liah

surprise flashed over jungwon’s face. “you really remembered what i was drinking?”

had he been observant? maybe. 

or maybe, he searched the tab history from the night before. 

surprisingly, his calculations were spot on. a text at 1:51. a check at 1:53 from table 46 with only two customers. 

he just prayed that it was correct. 

“occupational hazard. it’s hard to forget that many glasses of the same beer going to a table with two people.”

must’ve prayed well.

“hm.” jungwon wrapped both hands around the cold glass, condensation immediately dampening his fingers. he looked at it for a second, then back at jay. “...thank you.”

jay shook his head with a soft chuckle, pulling his card from his pocket.

“don't make it weird.”

“i wasn't going to.”

“sure.”

jungwon grinned into the glass before finally taking a sip, one hand messing with his hoodie strings. 

“...okay,” he admitted after swallowing. “maybe a little.”

jay shook his head, unable to resist the tugging at the corners of his mouth as he paid his bill and turned back to jungwon.

“you're lucky i don't charge interest.”

“wow. is this how you treat all your customers?”

“only the ones that bother me.”

jungwon let out another laugh, absentmindedly turning the glass against the countertop as he looked down into the amber liquid.

“that's a relief.”

jay crossed his arms and shrugged his shoulders, letting his hip rest against the bar.

“...a relief?”

“yeah.” jungwon glanced back up, a smile spreading across his lips. “for a second i thought you were starting to like me.”

for a brief, humiliating second, jay genuinely considered pretending he hadn't heard him.

he stood there against the counter, looking at jungwon as if the answer might be written somewhere on his face. his brain, usually so annoyingly quick to produce something dry or sarcastic, had decided to clock out for the evening.

he finally let out a breath, eyes rolling playfully. 

“yeah, that would be just horrible,” he muttered as he turned towards the computer again, smile growing. 

a chuckle escaped jungwon, quiet enough that it almost disappeared beneath the hum of the refrigerators. he ran a hand through his hair. “it would.”

jay slowly busied himself with absolutely nothing, tapping at the register screen before realizing he'd already closed his entire tab. he stared at the receipt summary for a second anyway, clicking through menus that didn't need clicking before giving up entirely. he couldn’t even do anything with them, he wasn’t clocked in. 

with a quiet sigh, he grabbed the rag from beside the sink and switched to wiping down the counter instead, dragging it slowly over a section he'd cleaned less than five minutes ago.

unbelievable.

one simple conversation, and suddenly he was acting like he'd never spoken to another human being before. jungwon had only smiled, made a joke, accepted a drink…so why was jay standing here pretending the counter still needed disinfecting?

he scrubbed a little harder. there wasn't even a stain.

get it together, jay.

he'd worked behind this bar long enough to know how conversations with customers went. there were jokes, stories, the occasional bit of harmless flirting. none of it was supposed to stick.

except apparently, his mind decided that this conversation was very different.

but why was this one different at all?

just talk to him.

every time he looked over, jungwon was still casually sitting there, like he hadn't completely derailed jay's ability to function the way he's accustomed to. meanwhile, jay was one sarcastic comment away from forgetting how to operate a cash register.

this was ridiculous.

and somehow, also making him painfully aware of every second that stretched between them.

talk.

behind him, he heard jungwon finally take another gulp of the beer, the glass tapping against the counter.

say something, jay.

then came the faint vibration of a phone.

jay looked over instinctively.

jungwon had already pulled the phone out of his pocket. whatever expression had been sitting on his face only a second earlier disappeared—not dramatically, not enough for anyone else to notice, probably. it just settled into something simple, something distant.

his eyes lingered on the screen, thumbs hovering over the keyboard. he typed something, then deleted it. typed again.

jay frowned before he could stop himself.

"...everything okay?"

jungwon looked up, almost startled that someone had spoken.

"oh." he smiled, though it looked forced this time. "yeah. sorry." without finishing the text, he slipped the phone back into his pocket, fingers lingering there for a second. "i should probably get going."

something in jay's chest sank before he could catch it.

they’d been talking for not even ten minutes. probably, not even five. 

he couldn’t even fight it. it was the most frustrating feeling, the most confusing–it was unfamiliar, unforgettable, and unexplainable.

but it’s fine.

this is what happens. customers come and go. 

except somewhere between a free beer and a handful of bad jokes, jungwon had stopped feeling like just another customer.

"oh."

brilliant.

an entire language and ‘oh,’ was apparently the best he could manage.

he cleared his throat and folded the rag over once more, giving himself something to do with his hands. "yeah. sure."

jungwon slid carefully off the stool, glancing down at the pint sitting between them.

there was barely any gone.

"...sorry," he said, resting his fingertips against the cold glass. "i didn’t really drink much of it."

jay followed his gaze.

a thin ring of condensation had already begun spreading across the wood beneath the pint. the foam had settled into a narrow white line around the inside of the cylinder.

"no, it’s okay. if you have to go, you have to go." jay set the rag down, stepping back towards the counter. 

“i guess, you’ll just…have to buy me another,” jungwon said with a low voice, shrugging his shoulders slightly. 

his eyes almost sparkled, a wide grin growing on his face. it was exactly the kind that seemed to sneak up on jay before he realized he was grinning too.

jungwon stepped backwards, pointing vaguely at jay.

"i'll see you around?"

jay slipped both hands into his pockets.

"i mean, can’t lose your streak now, right?"

"then…tomorrow?"

“i come in at 8.”

“so…”

“tomorrow.”

jungwon nodded.

"...right."

he didn't move.

he shifted his weight from one foot to the other, one hand still in his hoodie while the other drifted into the air as if he were about to say something else. his fingers traced a small, aimless gesture between them before dropping again.

his eyes wandered briefly around the bar—the stools, the menu, the barely touched beer still sitting on the counter—maybe the right sentence might be hiding somewhere in the room.

he opened his mouth to say something, anything. nothing came out. he scratched lightly at the back of his neck, letting out a quiet laugh at himself.

"...bye."

jay huffed an amused breath through his nose.

"bye."

jungwon offered one last awkward smile before finally turning toward the exit.

jay watched him weave between the tables, hands stuffed back into the pocket of his hoodie . just before he reached the door, he hesitated long enough to glance back over his shoulder. it wasn't even a full second, just a quick look accompanied by a small lift of his hand.

jay returned it with a lazy wave.

then the heavy front door swung shut behind him, muffling the sounds of the street as it settled back into place.

the room felt strangely different after that.

jay found himself staring at the front windows long after jungwon had disappeared from view, arms folded loosely across his chest and expression somewhere between thoughtful and annoyed.

he looked away with a quiet sigh.

what exactly had he expected?

that jungwon would stop 100 feet down the sidewalk, suddenly remember something important, and come back inside? that they'd pick up the conversation where they'd left off and keep talking until something interrupted their flow?

jay's eyes drifted back to the glass still sitting on the counter. 

get a grip.

“jay hyung! hellooo?” a hand suddenly waved in his face, making jay blink and lean back on instinct. from the cologne drifting off their wrist and silver rings alone, he instantly knew who was about to bother him.

“god, you startled me,” he muttered as he turned towards the voice. he set one hand against the bar, resting against it. “what do you want?” 

“wake up. i’ve been calling your name, man,” niki said quietly with a concerned look on his face, reaching past the older to grab a coaster. “what’s wrong with you…” he muttered to himself, his words more rhetorical than anything. 

“yeah, sorry. weird day,” jay replied, letting out a sigh. he leaned off the counter. “are you closing tonight?”

niki took a deep breath, tossing the coaster down the bar to his friend like it was a frisbee. “ah, yeah. i’m on friday nights from now on,” he started, facing jay once more. “it’s a shit mess with the opening crew right now.” 

“i can imagine,” jay sighed. it fell quiet for a moment, his gaze falling onto the floor absentmindedly. 

too quiet. 

his eyes suddenly snapped to niki, who stood there with arms crossed, head tilted, and a knowing smirk on his face.

jay was never going to escape these questions now. 

“hyung.”

“what?” he asked, eyebrows raising.

“who’s that blonde guy you were chatting up?”

jay groaned before sliding a hand down the side of his face. “god, not you too…”

“huh?”

"i’m back.”

sunghoon emerged, drying his hands on his pants as he walked behind the bar. “oh, hey niki,” he waved. they dapped each other up, exchanging brotherly smiles. sunghoon barely glanced at jay before his attention landed on the abandoned beer sitting between the three of them.

"...whose beer is that?"

jay didn't even spare a second thought to responding. he instead reached for the glass, the chill dampening his fingers as he lifted it from the counter. he tipped it back farther than he meant to, swallowing through the sharp bitterness before he had a chance to reconsider. it wasn't terrible. it was just... unmistakably alcohol.

when he finally lowered the glass, nearly two-thirds of it was gone.

he set it back on the wood with a thud and wiped the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand.

"mine."

sunghoon and niki both looked at him for a long moment before shifting their gazes to each other, exchanging concerned eyes. sunghoon glanced at the beer then back at jay, one eyebrow climbing higher with every passing second.

"since when do you drink beer?"

jay let out a harsh breath, grabbing the glass and dumping the rest down the sink. 

"since now.”

“that’s not an answer,” niki scoffed immediately, a shake of his head following. jay shot him a look over his shoulder. “well it answered your question, didn’t it?” 

“it actually didn’t answer anything,” sunghoon replied, folding his arms across his chest. 

jay leaned over the sink, rinsing the glass before setting it on the drying rack. “are we done here?” 

"absolutely not."

he sighed. "i'm going home."

"you're avoiding us."

jay reached for his backpack hanging beneath the counter. "good observation."

before he could sling it over his shoulder, niki stepped sideways just enough to block him. so irritating.

"hyung."

jay stared at him.

"niki."

"who was that blonde?"

jay pinched the bridge of his nose. "a customer."

niki’s chin lowered. "...a customer.” 

"yes.” 

“just a customer?” niki repeated slowly, narrowing his eyes as if tasting the words for flaws.

jay looked at him flatly. “yes, niki.”

"that you bought a beer for."

"...yeah."

"that you stood here talking to for..." he looked vaguely around the air, hands coming up as if he was weighing word options before finishing his sentence. “...i don’t know, five minutes?”

"yeah, niki,” jay shrugged one strap of his backpack over his shoulder. “i work at a bar." 

"you hate talking to customers."

"i tolerate talking to customers."

“same difference.”

jay looked toward sunghoon. maybe one reasonable person was enough.

who was he kidding? sunghoon hadn't even said a word in almost thirty seconds.

his eyes bounced between jay, the abandoned pint, and the front door. his expression had gone strangely blank, like pieces of a puzzle were quietly sliding into place. 

then his eyebrows shot upward.

"wait." he straightened. “blonde?” 

“yup,” niki nodded, an amused smile showing on his face.

"...hold on." sunghoon lightly smacked the back of niki's chest with the back of his hand, eyes never leaving jay. "you mean, the blonde you were telling me about at the rink? he was here?" he asked with disbelief, both hands motioning to the area surrounding them.

jay instantly regretted existing. "...maybe."

"maybe?"

"he came in."

"by himself?"

"...yes."

"and you bought him a drink?"

"can we please stop saying it like that?"

"like what?"

"like it sounds."

niki blinked. "...how else does it sound?"

jay stared at niki for a long moment.

"...shut up."

“it was just a question?” niki scoffed, face irritated. he stepped passed jay towards the computer. 

“jay.”

jay’s head turned to sunghoon, who looked at him with soft eyes. this was his best friend, they knew each other too well. the expression on his face was telling enough, sunghoon knew he couldn't deny it.

"do you like him?"

the question landed with far more force than it had any right to.

do i like jungwon?

no. surely that wasn’t it.

...did he?

jay's thoughts screeched to a halt, the question echoing around his head in a way that felt almost unfair. liking him? where had that even come from? they'd spoken twice. two short conversations didn't magically turn into feelings, did it? that was ridiculous.

wasn't it?

he couldn't even admit that he'd enjoyed talking to him, not even to himself, much less declare his possible feelings for him. every time the thought crept in, he buried it beneath excuses. 

he's just easy to talk to. he's just another customer. i was just being nice.

feelings didn't fit anywhere in that equation.

they couldn't.

jay blinked twice.

"...what?"

"the blonde."

"okay stop. i know which person you're talking about, and his name is jungwon."

"okay. jungwon,” sunghoon repeated with a proud nod, slightly impressed with this new revelation. finally, progress. 

“no.”

the answer came too fast, and the two boys caught it almost immediately. I mean who wouldnt, when jay was at this unmistakably insane level of denial. niki made a face to himself, fingers tapping at the POS.

"that was suspiciously quick," he commented, glancing at the other two over his shoulder briefly. 

jay couldn’t help but roll his eyes. "maybe because it's a stupid question."

"is it?" sunghoon asked, leaning back against the bar. jay couldn’t fool him. “you basically responded the same way when i asked about him yesterday at the rink.”

"you two are unbelievable,” jay muttered under his breath, adjusting his backpack straps.

sunghoon scoffed and leaned off the bar, patting jay’s chest lightly as he stepped past him and away from the bar. "and you, my friend, are deflecting."

"i'm leaving,” jay announced. 

he made it exactly one step before he was stopped, niki pivoting on his foot and grabbing his arm lightly.

"jay."

"what?"

he stopped despite himself. he couldn’t keep talking about this, especially not with these two…not with this weird feeling he couldn’t explain.

niki’s expression softened just enough to be irritating. he pulled jay’s arm lightly, turning the older to face him.

"you were smiling."

jay frowned. as if. that didn’t mean anything.

"that doesn’t mean anything,” he grumbled, pulling his arm out of niki’s hold. he began to walk past him once more, doing his best to escape this awful conversation. niki straightened and took a step with him, putting a hand on his shoulder this time. 

"yes, it does.”

“so what? people smile.”

“not you.”

jay genuinely had no response to that, and niki made it clear he knew that when he pointed at him dramatically.

"see! you know it’s true. you smile like..." he paused, searching for the comparison. "...once every leap year."

"that's not true,” jay shook his head, eyes falling to the floor.

sunghoon tilted his head from across the bar now.

"jay. when's the last time you smiled at a customer like that?"

jay searched for an answer almost immediately. there had to be one.

he'd worked behind that bar for years. thousands of customers had come and gone, conversations blending together until faces and names became little more than receipts and drink orders. surely there had been someone. someone he'd laughed with. someone he'd stood around talking to for longer than necessary.

he sifted through memory after memory, reaching farther back than he expected. busy friday nights. regulars who came in every week. birthdays. hockey fans. first dates. girls who flirted shamelessly just to score free shots.

nothing. not one conversation stayed with him the way this one had.

the realization settled somewhere deep in his stomach, and not because it answered sunghoon's question.

because it didn't.

"...i don't know."

the words left his mouth quietly.

and for the first time that night, they scared him a little.

jay had spent the better part of the last 12 hours insisting to everyone—including himself—that jungwon was just another person who came into the bar to drink. just another conversation. nothing worth thinking twice about.

except...normal conversations didn't follow him home. 

and they definitely didn't leave him completely unable to remember the last time he'd looked forward to talking to someone again. that was the part he wasn't ready to examine.

so instead, he looked away.

"exactly."

silence settled over the three of them for a moment.

jay hated that they weren't laughing anymore. it actually somehow made the conversation worse, because underneath all the teasing, they weren't trying to embarrass him. they were just genuinely curious.

and that made answering feel impossible.

what was he supposed to say? that some random guy had walked into the bar twice in two days and somehow managed to throw him completely off balance?

that five minutes of conversation had him scrubbing a spotless countertop just to avoid looking like an idiot?

that he'd spent the last three minutes staring at a front door like someone in a romance movie?

absolutely not. he'd rather quit.

he let out a slow breath. "...he's just..." the words caught in his throat. niki leaned forward immediately.

"he's just...?"

jay looked between the two of them.

"...a customer. he’s a customer."

niki groaned loud enough for someone in the kitchen to probably hear it.

sunghoon only smiled.

"right."

"...he is."

"keep telling yourself that."

he dropped his keys onto his kitchen island, the tinkling echoing slightly. his jacket followed, thrown over the back of a chair.

he dragged a hand down the side of his face as he leaned back against the counter, the exhaustion from being on autopilot his whole shift finally settling into his bones. he worked much later than normal, his brain felt fried, and all he wanted was a cold shower and sleep.

he tugged his phone out of his back pocket, swiping on the home screen.

03:27 AM. 

noti2fications: not many. 

he kept swiping, instagram dms, text messages, and youtube updates from the last couple hours lined up. 

and in the middle of it–

Fri 01:51 +82 (XXX) XXX XXXX: how’d i do?

jay stared at it for a moment longer than mandatory.

his thumb hovered over the notification. not pressing, not swiping. just…there.

right.

the napkin. 

him.

his head tipped back slightly as if that would shake the memory, a quiet breath escaping his nose. it didn’t work. if anything, it only became clearer. 

his slurred voice, his flushed cheeks and messy hair, the way he looked at jay like everything he said was something worth listening to.

annoying.

jay clicked it.

the thread opened, almost completely empty. 

the first message. 

yoooooo

the edges of jay’s lips threatened to curve up, his eyes darting a bit lower. then–

how’d i do?

he scoffed under his breath with scrunched eyebrows, shifting his weight slightly. “you disappeared,” he mumbled, wishing he could hear him. his fingers moved before he could think too hard about it.

jay: you were holding out on me

he stared at it. sucked in a deep breath, then hit send. 

the message delivered instantly.

read. 

jay blinked.

…already?

three dots. they jumped in a line a couple times–

then vanished. 

ten seconds passed, but to jay, it felt like minutes. 

the dots came back.

instead of simply retreating, the reply went through faster than it should have. 

+82 (XXX) XXX XXXX: i told u it was geometry

jay stepped off and away from the counter, a small smile just barely spreading across his face. he paced slowly into the living room, thumbs tapping away.

jay: okay i admit it you weren’t as bad as i thought

the typing bubble appeared again, the three dots dancing in a line briefly. 

+82 (XXX) XXX XXXX: wow that’s high praise coming from u

jay huffed quietly. 

jay: dont get used to it you still did it wrong

after texting that lie back, jay flopped back onto his couch, limbs spread across the cushions. he stared at the screen, thoughts quiet. 

read, but no dots? 

a minute passed. then three. then five. 

jay laid there, phone in hand and eyes on the screen. 

where did he go? can he please answer?

he closed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair, dropping his phone onto the side table next to him. 

i need to stop.

true. 

he lifted himself up off the couch by kicking his legs up to get momentum, grabbing his phone without sparing a glance at it. he walked to the bathroom with heavy footsteps, shutting the door behind him and setting it down next to the sink. 

after stripping off his sticky, dirty work clothes, he got in the shower and immediately turned the handle all the way to the left. 

the water sprayed against him, ice cold and sharp. he washed his face and began shampooing his hair, and although that was normally therapeutic enough to clear his mind, he was still overwhelmed with thoughts. 

then his phone buzzed. 

he heard the vibration, barely. his eyes snapped over to the direction of the sound, a moment passing before his hand reached out to open the shower door. he poked his head out and squinted his eyes at the screen, soap lather traveling from his hair to the tile floor. it buzzed again, lighting up. 

ice prince: are we still up for the rink tmrw? i really need to practice my triples

“god, sunghoon—“ jay grumbled, shoulders dropping. he reached for the phone anyways.

jay: yeah. 4?

ice prince: 👍

that’s it?

he tossed the phone back on the counter a lot harder than necessary.

“seriously, what is my problem?” he muttered to himself, shutting the shower door. the irritation sat in his chest for a moment before he frowned at himself.

with a groan, he stepped back under the freezing stream of water and shut his eyes, trying to forget it for the night atleast. 

the rink always smelled of faint metal.

not ice—people always said ice. jay thought otherwise.

ice doesn’t smell like anything. the rink smelled like sharpened blades, rubber mats, damp gloves, and the frosty bite of air conditioning working harder than it should. the cold settled into his lungs and stung his nose with every breath, familiar enough that he stopped noticing it years ago.

jay sat against the boards with his elbows on his knees, fingers wrapped loosely around a paper cup of coffee that had long since stopped doing its job. he was exhausted.

after his shower the night prior, he quicky shoved himself into bed and attempted to sleep off whatever this feeling he had in his chest was. attempted and failed miserably.

he had woken up multiple times throughout the night, limbs restless and thoughts loud. he was fighting every urge in his body to not text the stranger again, to not try to start up a conversation that would lead into more “hello, how are you”s than he was ever comfortable with. who knows what could happen after that.

across the ice, sunghoon flew past. the sound came first. 

the scrape of the outside edge, the shoot of snow from the blade, the soft hiss of the landing.

regardless of his mind wandering, jay locked back in with eyes following automatically. 

more crossovers. three-turn. jump, land. recover.

it was a rhythm. a rhythm jay knew well. a rhythm that today, jay could not find. 

sunghoon had always skated perfectly. he made every move look easy until someone else tried. every transition melted so smoothly into the next, it was sometimes hard to tell one move from another. skaters call it talent. jay called it 16 years of practice. 

from the very beginning of their decade long friendship, jay had been sunghoon's biggest supporter. he'd sat through endless training sessions, local competitions, regional competitions, national competitions. he'd filmed programs, held jackets and stuffies, listened to complaints about scoring systems, and spent more hours inside freezing rinks than any non-skater should.

jay knew what good skating looked like. he knew how difficult it was. 

sunghoon entered another sequence. he launched upward, rotating quickly beneath the fluorescent lights that the details blurred together. his landing was clean. not perfect, but clean. a small correction through his knee, some pretty arms, and now its fixed, settling back onto his edge. he moved into a series of turns, blades carving spirals into the ice below him before he accelerated again.

“...and you seem like one.”

a bad decision? what the hell does that even mean?

no, no. if anything, getting his number was a bad decision. he was just a drunk guy that wanted to fold silverware, and somehow, jay ended up with a text thread and a headache.

and no grasp on the situation? come on, jay. we all know you’re not keen on genuinely getting to know people, but you clearly cannot shake this and that's REALLY bad news. you know it too.

but the boy, he just looked so...mesmerizing.

stupid distractions, stupid blonde hair, stupid eyes, stupid– “what are you doing?” jay’s entire body jolted, head snapping up and coffee cup crunching beneath his grip. sunghoon stood in front of him, hands resting against the barrier. “uh–um…” he inhaled slowly with pursed lips and ran a hand up his thigh, posture correcting itself. he lazily pointed at the ice, letting out a soft click through his lips. “watching.” he scratched his nose as sunghoon raise an eyebrow. “...you skate.” sunghoon blinked. “right.” jay sat up slightly. “what?” “you know i can hear you even when i’m across the ice, right?” he tilted his head slightly, his expression furrowing. “hear what?” sunghoon cracked a small smile. “the whole conversation you’ve been apparently having with yourself.”

jay’s face dropped. 

he said all that out loud?

oh! play dumb.

“I’m not having a conversation with myself.”

he shook his head. “you absolutely are.”

“I’m absolutely not.”

sunghoon slowly leaned against the barrier with his forearms, eyes narrowing and the smirk still on his face. “you were just talking to yourself, you said something about…what was it? right, blonde hair–” jay shook his head a little too quickly, words racing out of his mouth. “i did not.” silence sat between them for a moment, the skater staring at him a little too closely.

sunghoon leaned forward slightly. “jay?” “...yes?” “who…has blonde hair?” “nobody.” “that's a lie.” “no it's not.” “jay.” “sunghoon.” “who?” “nobody!” sunghoon laughed and pushed off the boards. “you’re terrible at this.” “at what?” “lying.” jay opened his mouth, then closed it. opened it again. nothing came out. that’s because unfortunately, sunghoon was right. he was terrible at lying, especially when he didn't have any back ups prepared. sunghoon pointed a finger at him. “is it a girl?” “what? no–” “you answered that way too fast.” “maybe because it's not a girl.” “oh…okay.” sunghoon nodded slowly. “...so it's a guy.”

jay's eye twitched. “get back on the ice.”

sunghoon grinned. the kind of grin that meant he was never going to let this go.

“oh, this is huge.”

“it isn't.”

“park jongseong thinking about someone?”

“sunghoon.”

“and it’s a boy?”

“dude—“

“i've waited ten years for this.”

“go practice your jumps.”

sunghoon laughed outright this time, pushing backward onto the ice. “what's his name?”

jay let out a nervous breath, shaking his head slightly. “i don’t—i don’t know.” 

sunghoon froze, smile falling. “you don’t know his name?” he asked loudly, the question almost sounding like an accusation as words echoed through the rink. a couple skaters passed behind him, eyes darting towards the pair irately.

“we met at the bar and it was super brief. can't we talk about this later?” jay sighed, rubbing his cheek.

sunghoon huffed slightly. “will you buy me drinks later?”

he sent him a glare. “fine.” sunghoon smirked slightly, nodding to himself in approval. jay couldn’t help laugh once. “just go finish your jumps. you haven’t even touched your lutz or your loop yet and we’ve been here for two hours.”

sunghoon muttered a small ‘fine’ and launched himself away from the wall, already circling the curve of the ice and picking up speed. 

"i don't get it.” sunghoon let out an irritated sigh after another sip of his beer, absently rolling the glass between his palms. "everything feels right."

jay finished drying the last glass in his hand before setting it beneath the counter. "sometimes that's the problem, man."

sunghoon looked up.

"you've been skating long enough that your body fills in the blanks," jay continued, leaning his forearms against the bar. "you think you're doing the same thing every time because it feels familiar, but you've stopped paying attention to the little stuff."

"the little stuff?"

"your shoulders, mostly." jay gestured vaguely with one hand. "they're opening early again."

sunghoon frowned. "no, they're not."

"they are."

"i would've noticed."

jay laughed quietly through his nose. "clearly not."

sunghoon shot him an unamused look before taking another drink.

"i've watched every one of your run-throughs this week," jay continued. "you keep trying to muscle your way through the jump instead of trusting your edge. you're overthinking it."

"i'm not overthinking."

"sunghoon."

"...okay, maybe a little."

"a lot."

sunghoon groaned, letting his forehead fall into one hand. "this is exactly why i hate asking you."

"because i'm honest?"

"because you're annoyingly honest." he groaned. "the entire rink is conspiring against me."

"hah, there it is."

sunghoon pointed at him. "don't laugh."

"i'm trying not to."

sunghoon slumped farther over the bar with a dramatic sigh. "maybe i'm just getting old."

jay snorted. "you're twenty-five."

"exactly."

"that's not old."

"it is in figure skating."

“it’s not.” jay shook his head, amusement fading into something softer. "i think you've been chasing the perfect jump for so long that you've forgotten you're still landing them." he shrugged. "not every practice has to be the best one you've ever had. and you’ll get your quads by the beginning of next qualifier season anyways. then it's 'olympics, here we come.'"

sunghoon stared at him for a second before letting out a quiet breath. "...you're really irritating when you're right."

"i know."

another few seconds passed before sunghoon pushed his now empty glass towards the older.

"i'm gonna use the bathroom."

jay nodded and took the glass, setting it in the sink next to him. "take your time.”

he stood there for a moment after sunghoon disappeared around the corner, his eyes wandering absentmindedly across the bottles lining the shelves behind the bar. with his coworker busy taking care of another table, the rush had settled into something quieter. glasses clinked together somewhere near the back, the television hanging over the liquor wall mumbled through another sports recap, and laughter drifted over from a booth tucked in the corner.

his gaze eventually landed on the silverware tub sitting beside the POS.

he frowned.

i really need to stop thinking about him.

he leaned off the bar, turning to the computer to find his tab.

“excuse me?” 

the voice rang out from in front of the bar like extra smooth honey, unsure and sweet. it was soft, it was the kind of voice that acted like melatonin over a late night phone call.

without looking up, jay tapped at the screen mindlessly as he called out behind him. “i’m sorry, i’m not on the clock. someone else will help you in a moment.”

there was a small pause. 

“well…this is embarrassing.”

jay's fingers stopped moving. something about the voice tugged at the back of his mind, it was familiar. 

he turned, eyes widening before even fully processing who was in front of him.

blonde.

standing on the other side of the bar was the same guy from the night before.

except this time he looked so different.

his clothes still hung loosely off his frame, but his hair was smooth and draped perfectly around his face, his cheeks weren't nearly as flushed though still pink, and his eyes looked brighter now that they weren't fighting to stay open.

the edges of his lips curved up slightly, hands resting on the bar.

“I wasn’t really going to order anything.”

jay blinked once.

"you."

the stranger's smile grew, just enough to make the apples of his cheeks round. jay could only stare.

“me.”

"you came back."

"i did."

"...and you're sober."

 "yeah." the boy let out a quiet laugh, ducking his head for a second before looking back up. he rubbed the back of his neck and squinted slightly. "...barely."

that pulled the smallest breath of amusement from jay's nose before he could catch himself. 

"...well," he muttered, stepping away from the computer and towards the bar. "that's probably for the best."

"i figured." the stranger shifted his weight onto his other foot, his fingers drumming once against the edge of the counter before disappearing into the pocket of his hoodie. "thought it'd improve my chances."

jay raised an eyebrow. “of?”

"of, uh...not making a complete idiot out of myself...?" the stranger bit his lip slightly with an awkward half smile, settling his weight into one hip.

jay looked at him for a moment then let one corner of his mouth twitch upward. “i think it’s a little late for that.”

the stranger let out another laugh, this one louder. "fair."

his shoulders relaxed with the laugh, only a little, but jay caught it anyway. whatever nerves he'd might have walked in with hadn't disappeared—they'd just loosened enough that he wasn't standing quite so stiff anymore.

"i actually wasn't sure if you'd remember me," he admitted after a moment.

"i think i should be the one saying that."

the stranger smiled again. "i guess that's true."

"i mean..." jay shrugged, reaching to fold a rag next to him without taking his eyes off the boy. "you kind of argued with me while you were wasted over silverware, so..."

"yeah..."

"that's not exactly forgettable."

a sheepish grin spread across the stranger's face as he looked down at the floor for a second, almost laughing to himself.

"...i'll take that as a compliment."

another silence settled between them.

it wasn't awkward.

it was strangely easy.

jay found himself studying the stranger without really meaning to. without the alcohol, everything about him felt quieter. his smile came easy now, and instead of talking with his whole body like he had the night before, he seemed to hold himself back, carefully measuring every word before he let it leave his mouth. it made jay wonder how long he'd stood outside before finally working up the nerve to come in.

"this really is embarrassing," the boy murmured to himself, welcoming himself to the seat in front of him that sunghoon was previously sitting in. "...i came to properly introduce myself and i totally forgot to." 

he sat down.

jay laughed, his smile beaming. he couldn’t even begin to control it, no matter how hard he wanted to. “that’s impressive.” 

the boys eyes followed jay as he turned, reaching for a clean glass on the shelf behind him. with another nervous grin, he replied, “yeah, i was just…distracted.”

jay stepped back in front of him, hands mindlessly filling the glass with the tap next to them. “distracted?” he questioned, head tilting slightly. his gaze snapped back to him. “by what?”

the answer didnt come right away.

instead, the stranger watched him closely for a moment longer, smile softening sightly. no more funny business, no more awkward laughter filling the silence, just…honesty. 

“you.”

jay stopped the tap.

there was a beat of silence before he immediately looked away and set the glass down, clearing his throat as if that would cool the warmth creeping onto his face. 

“...right.”

smooth, jay.

real smooth.

a quiet huff escaped the other’s lips. it wasn’t mocking–if anything, it sounded relieved, like he’d finally managed to say what he had been thinking the whole time.

“anyway,” the blonde started, sitting up slightly. he pulled his hand out of his hoodie pocket and extended it across the counter. “i’m jungwon.”

jay's eyes dropped to the offer.

it hovered there confidently enough, but not impatiently. it actually seemed like jungwon was fully prepared for him not to take it.

after a brief pause, jay wiped his palm on his pants and reached across the bar.

his grip was firm without trying to be, and before he had the chance to think about it–or even process what just happened–he gave it a small shake and pulled away.

“jay.”

jungwon smiled. he shoved his hand back in his pocket. 

“i know.”

jay never tried to sound like a know-it-all. Its just that his day-to-day mindset consists of thinking that humans are stupid, and that they should be educated instead of dense and oblivious. living life as if everything will work out perfectly is not jay’s cup of tea. he doesn’t even like tea.

he tried going on a tinder date once during his third year of college. god, was that a disaster. 

the girl was nice and suggested going to kbbq, and jay was actually sort of enjoying himself. he had begun to share his struggles of being a blockhead after saying something that slightly offended her when the grill flared up. shockingly, everyone had to evacuate the restaurant. talk about clearing the air. 

yeah, no relationships for this guy. he’s never had any luck with love. that was the one and only time jay took something as a “sign.” afterwards, he swore he’d never again.

regardless of him being 25 years into his lifespan with having almost zero friends and definitely no relationships, jay was comfortable. he had a reliable job that was actually kind of tolerable, was settled into a nice apartment right smack in the center of seoul alone, and could keep his own peace on a daily basis by avoiding any type of human interaction besides when he’s bartending. 

speaking of. 

it was late. much later than jay normally stayed while clocked in. he would work until close but he wasn’t used to actually closing. he generally doesn’t work thursday nights, but his coworker insisted on swapping shifts because she found out her sister was in the hospital. it would make sense if she was dying or something, but she had just broken her wrist badly. to him, it seemed like maybe a fit enough reason. almost. 

he was still thinking about the last cocktail he poured five or ten minutes ago, thoughts mixed in with the alcohol and hands mindlessly rolling silverware next to the POS.

shit. did i forget the mint leaf? 

it was bothering him, more than it should. with furrowed eyebrows, his head snapped up and he glanced down the bar towards the woman he poured it for. his eyes squinted as he analyzed the drink. it was practically gone. up and down, left to right, his gaze moved, scanning every millimeter. 

It was buried under the ice. 

as he saw the tiny blob of green through the glass, he let out a small sigh he didn’t realize was in him, turning back to the silverware in front of him. 

of course, he fucked it up…and that’s what he gets for multitasking while he’s this tired.

he pulled the utensils off of the napkin and laid it back out properly, just like he had done millions of times before. you’d think he’d be able to do it successfully without looking, but maybe not.

“I could toootally do that.”

the voice dragged out like the words were heavy, vowels stretching oddly. it came from somewhere in front of the counter, too loud against the quiet hum of the bar to go unnoticed. 

jay paused mid-fold, knife slipping slightly against the fabric. 

“i mean–seriously,” the stranger continued, a soft thud following as if they leaned too hard against something. “you’re jus’ foldin’ some shit right now…like, reaally…how hard could it be?”

it was quiet for a moment, the stranger’s patience lingering in the air. jay could hear it, he could feel it. in his chest, on the back of his neck. 

on any other day, jay would have simply ignored the customer. he would keep thinking about what to eat when he got home, which clothes he would wear to bed, or what to hit at the gym the next morning…but for some reason, he felt drawn to the conversation.

for the first time in his life, he felt like he had to respond. he felt like if he didn’t reply, he would surely, weirdly…regret it later. 

clearly, this guy behind him is drunk out of his mind, but that made no difference for jay. not this time. not right now. though, he wasn’t exactly sure why.

jay didn’t look up right away. he couldn’t. instead, he adjusted the napkin again, smoothing out a wrinkle that didn’t exist to buy himself a second. the strangers opening lines echoed in his head another time, and he couldn’t help but purse his lips to hold back a smile.

he finally glanced over his shoulder towards the voice, their eyes locking. objectively, only a second passed. subjectively, it wasn’t even close. 

the boy slumped against the corner of the counter looked about his age–maybe a bit younger, but it was hard to tell under the flush of alcohol. his hoodie sat crookedly on his shoulders, his blonde hair was a mess, and his grip on the edge of the bar looked like it was the only thing connecting him to gravity. 

there it was again. the fighting urge to respond. jay didnt know if it was the look in the boys eyes, the softness in his cheeks, or the shine on his lips. it could’ve been the way his bangs kept slipping into his eyes, only for him to blink them away like it was a losing battle he wasn’t interested in winning. whatever it was, jay couldn’t resist it.

he clicked his tongue softly and looked away first, just for a moment, like that alone could undo it–whatever it was. the pull. the curiosity. the…something.

finally, jay raised a brow. “yeah?” his gaze quickly found its way back to him.

“yeah,” the boy nodded, a little too quickly. “gimmie one…i’ll show you.” jay let that sit in the air. there were hundreds of responses he could’ve gone with. 

no.

absolutely not. 

please dont touch anything. 

you’re drunk and out of your mind, leave me alone.

or…jay could give in to what his heart was telling him and let the guy fold one. but did he really want to do that? 

he found himself reaching for a second napkin and set of utensils before he could stop himself. “you ever worked at a bar before?”

the boy squinted at him like the question was offensive. “i have…watched people work at a bar.”

“right,” jay muttered. he set the things on the counter in front of the stranger. “knock yourself out.”

this is a bad idea.

jay thought it the second he handed the utensils over, watching as the guy fumbled with them like coordination was optional and balance was a suggestion at best. and the napkin didn't stand a chance.

he laid it out on the counter carefully, though it still ended up crooked. he picked up one corner, dragging it across to the opposite side. he stared at it for a moment before shaking his head and flattening it back out. 

“nice technique,” jay murmured with arms crossed, his hip settling against the side of the counter. 

the boy huffed and sent jay a weak, flustered glare. he quickly glanced back at the napkin and smoothed it with both hands, overly focused, like if he stared at it hard enough it would behave. “i’m doing my best,” he replied, voice low and words slurred. he picked the fork up and set it down on the napkin.

jay’s eye twitched. 

“you’re doing it wrong.”

“i literally just started.”

“yeah, and you’re already doing it wrong.”

“okay—wait,” the boy mumbled, squinting down at it. he picked up the knife next and looked at it closely, turning it around slowly up in front of his face. “this is…this is harder than it looks.” 

shocker. 

jay observed closely. 

there were so many things he could’ve criticized about what the guy was doing–the placement, the angles, how he kept readjusting like he couldn’t remember what he’d just done or even begin to think about what to do next. and still, jay didn’t say anything.

he just…watched.

then, like something clicked, the boy suddenly pushed the fork off the napkin with surprising confidence and set the knife down at a very specific angle. it couldn’t have been more incorrect.

jay let out a quiet scoff, amusement slipping through despite himself. “what are you doing?”

“geometry.”

“geometry?”

“ok, stop—you’re…you’re like, pressuring me right now,” the boy said, waving a hand vaguely between them.

jay tilted his head, shoulders raised. “i’m not pressuring–”

“nooo, no…you are.”

“i’m not!”

“shhhh,” the stranger shushed, holding up a finger to his mouth and almost missing. “this—this is a performance.”

jay pursed his lips together. “...a performance.”

the boy rolled his eyes with a dramatic sigh, shooting jay another feeble glare. “stop—stop repeating everything i say.”

jay lifted his hands in brief surrender, nodding once.

as the boy continued to try and fold the napkin, his tongue poked out of his mouth slightly in concentration, brows furrowed like this actually mattered. and truthfully, it shouldn’t have caught jay’s attention. 

but it did. 

“i’m jay.” 

what?

why is he blurting his name out right now?

to jay, telling someone your name means you want them to remember you. your face, your words, the impression you leave behind, no matter how small. 

and this…this wasn’t that kind of moment.

right?

it’s fine. its just my name. people share their names all the time. normal people do that.

sure, jay. 

normal people say their names, but not him. in fact, he couldn’t even care less about the names of the people he sees almost everyday. not once has he spared a glance at the apron of the barista that serves him his iced americano every morning, nor has he asked the name of the guy that goes to the gym at the same time as him every monday and wednesday night. 

so why did he just introduce himself like that?

no one asked, and he was certain that this drunk guy in front of him couldn’t give a shit either. there was no reason for it, no set up, no relevance. he just…he just said it, like it was a necessary step for what comes next.  

jay doesn’t do that. doesn’t hand out his name like it means nothing, like it doesn’t give someone somewhere to put him. names stick. that’s the problem. 

it’s fine. he’s drunk. he won’t remember this tomorrow. 

then tell us, jay.

why does it feel like it matters anyways?

this is what happens when he’s tired. exactly! right, he just needs some sleep…that’s just it. 

definitely.

his brain is just sloppy. that leads to loose decisions, unnecessary engagement…he should’ve ignored him. that was the correct move. that’s always the correct move. 

instead, he’s introducing himself to strangers now. 

fantastic. 

the boy didn’t react immediately, his hands slowly coming to a stop. 

“jay…” he repeated, lips blowing the bangs out of his eyes. his pupils rolled slightly, cheeks flushing more than before as he went back to messing with the fork. “yeaaah, i’m gonna forget that by tomorrow.” 

jay’s stomach felt queasy hearing that.

“then…let me put it in your phone so you don't." 

oh, so it was word vomit.

you dumbass.

didn’t he just say this wasn’t that kind of moment?

the boy stared at him for a second like he was trying to decide if that was a joke, his hands stilling once more. 

“…you’re serious?” he asked, words slower now as if they had to travel farther to get out.

jay didn’t answer right away. that was probably answer enough.

the boy snorted softly with a small grin, shaking his head as he fumbled for his phone, nearly dropping it onto the floor before catching it against the counter. 

“this–this is…a terrible idea,” he muttered, but he unlocked it anyway and slid it across. 

jay hesitated for half a second, a heavy gulp sounding from his throat as he reached for the phone.

“...and why is that?” he asked, already opening the contacts app. 

the stranger squinted at him. apparently, this question took effort to process. 

his lips parted slightly before a quiet laugh slipped between them. “mmm, ‘cause,” he started, dragging the sentence as he began to toy with the napkin again, “i make bad decisions.” 

he leaned heavier against the bar, his cheek almost pressing against the marble as he looked up at the other.

“...and you seem like one.” 

jay's thumbs froze mid-type, intrigue flickering over his face as he glanced up at the boy.

for a second, neither of them looked away. the air between them tightened, something unspoken passing back and forth. it was almost like a silent dare, like whoever broke first would lose something either of them named yet.

“yeah?” jay finally murmured, looking back down at the phone in defeat. “you always this honest when you’re drunk?”

the boy hummed as his smile grew, eyes half lidded as he watched him. “only when it matters.”

what game is he trying to play?

jay exhaled quietly through his nose, choosing not to chase that thought. instead, he continued to type.

Jay (Bar)

“there,” he said, voice lighter than he expected. he handed the phone back to the stranger. “text me something.”

“wow, official,” the boy said as he read the screen. he huffed softly, pushing himself up off the counter, “...and so bossy.” he grabbed the phone back slowly, fingers brushing against jay’s for just a second longer than necessary.

jay watched as the other tapped his screen an aggressive amount of times, his own phone buzzing in his pocket a moment later. he pulled it out, looking at the notification. 

+82 (XXX) XXX XXXX: yoooooo

jay let out a quiet breath, something almost like a laugh threatening to surface before he pushed it down. when he looked back up, the boy was already watching him.

“what’s your name?” jay asked, thumb hovering over the screen as he opened a new contact.

“…mm,” the boy hummed, thinking way harder than the question required. he slouched over the counter once more. “you can just…put something random.”

“that’s not how this works.”

“sure it is.”

jay sighed softly. 

of course it is.

“just tell me,” he urged, his voice quieter. 

“i’ll tell you when i trust you.” 

oh, look at that, jay. he sounds like you. 

that careful distance. that stupid, deliberate withholding.

his tongue pressed against the inside of his cheek, gaze dropping for half a second as something tight twisted in his chest.

it’s like he’s being mirrored.

that’s not how this works.

he’s the one that’s cautious. he’s the one who hesitates.

not the other way around.

jay’s lips parted, words already forming though he didn’t know exactly which ones yet. 

“hey, i just–”

“bartender!”

jay’s head snapped toward the other end of the bar, jaw tightening for half a second before he forced it to relax. right. his job.

he glanced back at the stranger, like he could hold him there just by looking. “don’t move.”

the boy didn’t answer. just watched him, the same unreadable expression in his eyes. 

jay turned away anyway.

it didn’t take long. just a drink, a quick pour, a nod, a receipt shoved across the counter.

one or two minutes. maybe three.

but when jay looked back–

he was gone.

no hoodie slumped over the marble, no messy hair, no flushed cheeks, no lingering presence, like jay had imagined the whole thing. 

just the quiet hum of the bar again.

jay stood there for a second, eyes scanning the space like he’d missed something obvious. 

his phone buzzed in his pocket. 

+82 (XXX) XXX XXXX: how’d i do?

jay scratched his head, gaze darting around as if an explanation would be floating in the air. 

what’s he talking about?

and at the edge of the counter, right where the boy had stood, the silverware was there. 

perfectly folded.

hopefully, this comes as a wakeup call to all the engenes acting recklessly and on impulse. i personally expected this to be the reason for him leaving the group to pursue his solo activities, knowing enhypen's schedule is packed full with short breaks rarely. maybe in addition to this, theres something else going on but thats not my place to say or expect. i'm just glad theres been no statement saying hee is injured/struggling health wise. before i saw this, i thought maybe because of his health, he couldn't do both at once. however, i'm grateful knowing he's ok (as far as we know) and that the main reason for his departure was simply because he just does not have enough time to do both.

to come back to what you said specifically, i completely agree. i was so lost as to why engenes comparing to other groups made any sense. i said this in my original statement post but heeseung is heeseung and enhypen is enhypen. they arent anyone else, and just because other idols have had fulfilling solo careers within their group activities doesn't mean just anyone can. every engene saying, "i don't get why he cant go solo while in the group, everyone else does!" heeseung is not everyone else. in fact, no one is anyone else. just like you mentioned, all of these situations are different. there is no one idol, group, or company that has had an exact situation to another i fear. theres always something different, whether we know it or not.

thank u for sharing all this info! im sure others will appreciate reading your ask and seeing how much ball you know. also thank u again for sending this.

now regardless, no one knows why heeseung is still involved in the merch, fancalls, or why he was weirdly removed from upcoming/happening schedules with the enhypen members. and like you mentioned, the en'o'clock episodes were going to be released but postponed due to heeseungs appearance them.

my key phrase here: no one knows why.

i definitely think its a little fishy, no matter how bad i want it to be a clean, drama free situation. thats not in my power, nor is it in any of the millions of fans that thought otherwise (lol). even so, it is still really weird, you're not wrong.

and queen u are funny LMAO "yes our ace whatever you want"

to that i say, i have no idea either. i honestly wouldnt past the company to treat him that way. this company x idol trope is giving situationship. toxicity but also bowing down at the same time, woof......

it seems really random, but even if it was OR wasnt, it is what it is and we need to accept it the way its given to us. i agree that he has enough of a standing to demand what he wants if he really decided to be an asshole, but like i said, these are all things no one has conclusions to. maybe heeseung was really the bad guy here. anything could've happened.

whether its true or false, what we strictly know is that belift sat down the boys and talked to them about what they see in their future as enhypen. heeseungs was very different due to him wanting to pursue solo activites. somehow someway, they negotiated for god knows how long and out of the blue, they tell us heeseung left enhypen to be a soloist and their reasoning is because that way, it is overall more fufilling for him and for the current enhypen members that want to continue as a group.

that is literally all we know.

if i had to guess, that is probably like 3% of what actually happened. there is so much that goes on behind the scenes that none of us will never know or even begin to understand. i repeat, anything couldve happened.

the worst thing to do right now is make up tons of assumptions and yell at other engenes thinking we know everything. i dont know if you could tell, but the comments on my other post are very mixed. some of the engenes comment are proving my point, others are agreeing with me.

i stand by what i say and my whole goal is to let engenes know that we really dont know shit and we need to keep it that way. meddling is doing NOTHING. the petitions are doing NOTHING. spreading rumors is doing NOTHING.

we need to support heeseung and ot6 enhypen and be EXCITED FOR THEM.

that is what i think.

regardless of belifts, hybes, and hitman bangs shady behavior, it is so clear that heeseung did in fact have somewhat of a say in the final decision of his standing in the company. taking things like "as per the companys suggestion" and running with it DOES NOT MEAN WE KNOW EVERYTHING.

what do you guys know about running a kpop group? oh nothing? so WHY are we assuming whats BEST for heeseung and the enhypen members? why are we attacking belift and heeseung for this decision that has already happened??? why are we attacking when maybe this could all be a good thing instead?????

you’re not the ceo of hybe, are you? do you work under belift? how do you know that heeseung could go solo while still being in group activities? oh, haha you don’t, right. and people sending trucks and sharing pictures that are allegedly yuki and heeseung and other staff members, saying, "oh my god they've seen the trucks!" gang, there is like 10 of them outside. you think they cant see? OH MY GOD THEY HAVE EYES!!! WHATT?? this is just embarrassing. i can’t imagine how heeseung feels. and i'm sick and tired of the comparisons going on. heeseung is NOT MARK and hybe is NOT SM. heeseung is NOT YEONJUN and enhypen is NOT TXT. just because we've seen successful solo careers from other idols while still remaining in group activities DOES NOT mean that any idol from any company can achieve that.

it is THAT simple. comment sections, reels, tiktoks, twitter, facebook, tumblr, god i've even seen on ao3 everyone saying #bringheeseungback and all of this bullshit. how do you think heeseung feels??? one million+ signatures on the petition to PUT HIM BACK IN THE GROUP he isnt in anymore????

this is his SOLO CAREER WE ARE TALKING ABOUT. this is how he makes MONEY, this is his LIFE. god forbid a full grown adult artist wants to CHANGE UP HIS SOUND and chase a DIFFERENT DREAM. and you all need to forget the fact you do NOT personally know heeseung. “i just know he wouldve picked the boys over going solo” “this isnt like heeseung, the company definitely forced him."

all of this is exactly what parasocial behavior looks like.

and if heeseung chose this himself, then what would he think?? imagine millions of your fans not wanting you to go solo. heeseung is not your bestfriend, he is not your boyfriend, your husband, your cousin, sibling, mutual, he is NONE OF THAT. so stop acting like you know him like that. we've all seen the horrible secrets that idols can hold whilst the fans obliviously support them. none of us know REALLY know him. enhypen has been a group for almost 6 years and the way this has been handled just makes me so disappointed in so many engenes. i have barely seen engenes show their support to the other members, did everyone else just forget about them? about their possible feelings? YOU ALL NEED TO WAKE THE FUCK UP. this is not some lucid dream where YOU ALL get to decide what happens to our boys. this is fucking reality, you guys need to ACCEPT whats happened and support heeseung and the enhypen members by RESPECTING their decisions and looking forward to their promotions and future activities as a soloist and group moving forward. this is not about what YOU think feels right or wrong, this is about what’s actually going on and taking it at face level.