the boy that disappears.

Bishan kept an eye on him as he tried the tea, he wasn’t so certain Liam wouldn’t sputter and throw the tea all over him. But none of that happened, he raised an eyebrow as he watched Liam actually trying to enjoy the tea. Clearly not a hundred percent sure whether he did. “Does it help?” he asked. Since that was mostly the whole point of the ginger. 

He laughed. “Yeah, well, for me. That pretty much did the trick. For you, you might need more than just better food.” 

                                ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

“i think so. it’s really interesting,” he nods, giving the tea another sip. he could do this. he could manage it. or, so he hopes, anyway.

Yahnaa looked at him with wide eyes, then squeezed his hand again. “I am keeping you to teach me these things!” She stated. “See, I take in all these things without fact-checking them. So thank you!” She held a hand to her mouth as her cheeks darkened a little. “Yes, good to know,” she said, as if an inside joke between the two of them. She needed to reign herself in more, but she worried that was never going to happen. And she was only going to be worse when she was a shriffling grandparent. 

“Ah, so you have a year’s worth of skills,” she suggested. “Jesse is your brother?” she asked. She too had a brother who helped people, she had never much been the person to learn a helpful skill to do the same, but she understood the interest. She had always wanted to be of service to others. Mostly through company however. “You solved the water thing? I think that makes you a bonified hero!”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

“yeah. he’s on the council.” from where they stood, liam nods towards his older brother with a small and sad smile, still observing how he spoke to different members of the town, how he put on a front to support them if he could. not that either of them wanted to be there but, jesse would always take the duty he’s given seriously, wouldn’t he?

— 🩺 —

Kai’s was his happy place. 

Jo didn’t know who this Kai was, but clearly he was someone here in town, someone who had given Liam something new to hold onto. And damn, wasn’t it adorable?

“Okay. Kai’s,” Jo agreed with a nod, running with it. Not exactly what she expected, but it would work - though if Kai was somewhere here, Liam could very well be there with him now, couldn’t he? Regardless - 

“So imagine you’re at Kai’s, you’re comfortable relaxing on the couch or wherever. Run through the five senses with me. What do you hear? What do you see? Taste, smell, feel?”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

it isn’t terribly difficult to picture and yet liam still fidgets uncomfortably where he sits, closing his eyes as his fingers curl into his chest and he sucks in a shaky, unsettled breath. 

“um, i hear him humming and tapping on his knee, ‘cause he’s always singing to himself quietly when he’s concentrating and um, i see his books, and his empty bottles and, um, i see — he has this weird little corner in his room that he said max sleeps in when she stays over. and um. taste, uh, i can taste — “

liam pauses there, a flood of red shooting to his cheeks.  he’d skip that one.

“uh — i can smell him and, and dinner and i feel... i feel like...”

when: August 26th, midafternoon where: Town Square-ish somewhere?  who: closed @liamhart

The storm had come through town without warning. One minute it had been another hazy day in Georgia, if a bit cloudy. Jesse had actually been relieved not to have the sun bearing down on them for a day this morning. But the clouds had turned angry and churning, the winds had picked up, and the rains had begun in what felt like a blink of an eye. 

Jesse had ushered anyone he could into Town Hall, but the damp and disheveled faces were not the one he was looking for. It meant Liam was still out there. And while it had been years since Liam had last huddled scared under blankets because of a thunderstorm, he still didn’t like the idea of him stuck at the home all alone - or the library, or…well, he couldn’t even be sure where else the boy might want to go.

He steps out into the pelting rain once more, looking for any other residents that might need shelter in the darkened halls of Town Hall - but more importantly the stubborn younger Hart. He’s heading in the direction of their home when he stumbles upon him, calling his name over the din of the storm.

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

strange, how rain could hurt so much against bare skin.

stranger still that he barely notices it as he fights the cold wind and the fear swallowing him whole. it’d be smarter, to stay in doors he thinks. and maybe he would’ve, cowering away beneath his bed, if he didn’t know that kai was out there somewhere far more afraid than he would ever be when the sky crackled and screamed.

only, rational thinking is far more difficult to hold onto when the mind wishes to escape entirely and as liam stumbles through the weather without a real destination in mind, he almost doesn’t hear jesse, doesn’t see him through the static of the rain.

— 🐕 —

“Yeah, alright,” Jesse agrees with a nod of his head, thinking it should be easy enough to come to Liam when he needs his help. Frankly, Liam was probably the first Jesse would go to for just about anything other than council specific details - and even then, he wasn’t that keen on keeping him out of the loop. But at the same time, what was going on now - the supply shortage and all that - well, it just seemed like something more to worry about that Liam didn’t need on his plate.

The desire to work in the clinic, however, was news - but now that it was out in the open, he supposed it made sense, to some degree. Liam always had interest in the science and medicine area. The area he’d planned to go into, forensics, wasn’t terribly far off in the grand scheme of things really. And besides, Liam had always been a quick study - far quicker than Jesse ever had. “Of course,” he says simply, a lift of his shoulders in a shrug accompanying the words. “I think we could always use more hands in the clinic, Fletch and Holly and the others will probably appreciate the help.” And he did have a valid point - it was still within the walls and relatively low risk, at least at the moment. He supposed that could change at any minute - but that was true of just about anything. 

But as Liam launches into an explanation of what he’d do if he hadn’t gotten permission Jesse just shakes his head a bit. “Don’t threaten me,” he huffs, giving Liam a playful nudge in the ribs. “You do that I’ll have to wring your neck myself.” 

Bishan stopped fanning the tea and took a sip from it himself. Puta, it was good. He brushed his own saliva from the mug with the back of his hand and handed it to Liam. Expectingly. Maybe the kid wouldn’t even know what hit him, or not like it at all, but he decided to just deal with whatever Liam felt like dramatically sharing about the strong ginger. 

“Yeah, used to be just as scrawny, small kid, very little to no muscle or meat on my bones,” he explained. Though, it had been an easy fix for him. More food, constantly being outside and working. He didn’t do any training, he hated the idea of working out. But he was always lifting things. 

He laughed at Liam too though. “Eat better,” he suggested. “Maybe come work in construction.”  

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

he’s not entirely convinced by bishan’s reaction to the tea but he takes it anyway with a pinch of salt, bringing it to his own lips to take a delicate sip. the taste... isn’t one he can begin to describe and as he swallows, he makes small popping noises with his lips in the attempt to decide whether or not he liked it. “oh... it’s... hm...” another sip, another series of noises and then leon sits back against the couch and hums into the cup, taking more and more in with a curious expression. it was alright, not something he’d reach for on the day to day but he could drink this now. it’s different; and he liked different. 

— 🩺 —

“No, Liam,” she says firmly, leaning just a bit in the direction his eyes are looking to try and get his attention on her - without touching him, of course. What she wanted to do was grab his face in between her hands and tell him everything would be alright, but this case very much didn’t seem like that would help. “It’s not stupid, you’re not being stupid. Pain is never stupid.” 

She shifts her position, instead sitting down on the floor in front of him and crossing her legs. Her elbows rested upon her knees, hands folding in her lap. 

“That does sound difficult.” Having to go through watching family suffer, especially in a world like theirs where there simply wasn’t any easy answers for things, any confirmation that they’ll heal up in a few days after seeing the doctor. “I want you to do something for me,” she says after a brief pause. “Tell me about a place where you felt…most relaxed. Happy. Or even a place that you dream of that you’ve never actually been to - a hammock on the beach with a good book in your hands, or I dunno - a cabin in the woods with a bunch of cuddly critters around. Where’s that happy place for you?”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

“a happy place...” 

there were plenty, or at least, there used to be. the park near their house back in chicago, the library. his brother’s bedroom when they hung out together and his own room when the ceiling full of stick on stars glowed in the dark. 

but as of recent, his happy place remained wherever kai would be, didn’t it? his apartment or the tavern, the park under their tree. wherever kai went, liam’s happy place would follow; that undeniable feeling of being safe no matter the circumstance. an acceptance long overdue he’d never felt before outside of jesse and their parents.

“i... like it at kai’s,” liam begins to say slowly, watching jo’s hands in her lap for something to focus on. “s’always comfy there.”

— 🐕 —

Jesse didn’t really have a straightforward answer to Liam’s words. He wasn’t struggling, not really. He didn’t have anything to talk out or work on. 

He was just tired. 

Their supplies were running low, but they had a plan for that - well, as much of a plan as they could have. Fairvale was still standing, and it was how they would continue to survive. 

But there was always more to think about. More to worry about. Jesse had always been the type to overthink things, so it wasn’t as if him being burdened by the weight of something so heavy should be new.

“Talking it all out with you isn’t going to help me.” It would only give him reason to worry more - to worry about Liam more than he already did. Because knowing Liam he’d try to help by doing something drastic that might end up getting himself hurt, or bitten, or killed. And Jesse already had enough of that to worry about as it was.

“I just need you here, safe. That’s what I need from you. That’s how you help me.” 

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

it’s with a small and exasperated sign that liam sinks down into the couch beside his brother, perhaps somewhat close to accepting this defeat. for now, anyway. jesse would be a tough nut to crack it seemed. not that he expected any different but, well, they were talking.

at least it’s a start.

“then... then i want to ask something in return,” the boy begins, his words hesitant and yet filled with a stubborn kind of determination that doesn’t generally come so naturally to him these days.

“well, two things. but um, first; when you do need help, you’ll come to me. even if it’s small. even if i’m your errand boy for the day or something. you just... ask me, okay? and... and the other thing is, i want to help out at the clinic. m’gonna talk about it more with fletcher but, i want to help. and at least the clinic is within the walls, right? it’s still here and it’s safe. but i think someone like... well, like you, on the council? needs to say it’s okay. so... yeah.”

then, with a cheeky head tilt and a small smirk that he’s most certainly picked up from kai as of late, liam looks to his brother with raised brows.

it was odd. kai used to never be the type to say no to a party or to any excuse of getting drunk. but the waste of resources and crowded company within the tavern just didn’t seem appealing. especially when he could rather be here, alone, with liam. it was much more enjoyable that way. granted, if liam wanted to go, kai could grin and bear it. but not to much shock, it wasn’t exactly liam’s seen. 

there were furrowed brows on kai’s features though as liam spoke up. he debated on making a guess, but suppose the list of silly things to want were seemingly endless. and knowing liam, it probably wasn’t even all that silly. “and what do you want?” malakai questions back quietly, a hand moving to comb through the older’s hair. 

“wild sex all night? gee, didn’t know you had the stamina in you,”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

giggling to himself, he greets the hand at his hair with a grin, cozying up all the more to his boy with a rather large temptation to say yes, that’s exactly what he wanted and could perform just as well in kind. and while he doesn’t fall into such a trap so easily, he does put a pin in it for later. 

they had all night, after all. better to make the most of it.

“um, well, it’s just that — the school dance thing was my first dance, right? and well... we didn’t get to dance. and i don’t want to go to the bar to have an excuse to and, i heard you humming the other day and it sounded really nice and —” 

liam inhales, exhales, then performs his best case of the puppy eyes.

things had to have changed. and while kai only got bits and pieces of how the hart brothers’ relationship was before prior to now, it was evident that months away, while thinking the other was dead, things were bound to change. not to mention the grief of their parents. and jesse didn’t exactly seem the… talksy-feelsy type. cupping liam’s cheeks in his hands, he pressed a soft, reassuring kiss to his forehead. “it’s not weird,” he promised out quietly. 

“maybe he’s just… more broke now. doesn’t wanna show that? y’know, seems like he was the.. macho type? doesn’t know what to do now that you can take care of yourself,” he murmured his observations. his guesses. all while lightly letting his fingertips mess with the strands of liam’s hair. “there’s just… a dynamic change. you two will work it out. fit together again. promise.”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

though it isn’t a promise that kai can keep, liam hangs onto it anyway. there’s an awareness that he needs to speak to jesse himself, sit him down and clear the air and hope that would be enough. but it’s true, isn’t it? that his brother isn’t the same any more just as much as he himself is. they’re different; broken in different ways, new demons haunting the cracks that neither would wish to burden the other with. 

a new dynamic that, liam isn’t so sure he likes.

Yahnaa’s eyes shone brightly when she spoken, then turned into a bubbling laugh when she realised he was thinking other things than she was. “Oh, oooh, I was thinking you meant like… our spirits. But yes, you are right, bones can survive for a long long time, calcium is immensely strong. It’s why our nails grow when we’ve already died. Though… fire does break bones down.” She shuddered slightly, then laughed a little. “I am sorry. I always fear cremation, you know, the idea that someone would burn the body after death, but I’ve grown up Muslim, in a country with a lot of Hindu’s, and one of my biggest nightmares growing up was being on a funeral pyre because my parents couldn’t find me or something. If I die, you’ll have to bury me, understood.” She pressed her hand against her mouth again. “I talk way too easily about that, sorry.” 

“Forensics! Oh, very interesting! Did you get a chance to do some studying? Or was it mostly a dream?” She mused for a moment, humming with interest. “Well, I guess you’ll enjoy my macabre humour then, or… talk in general. I obsess over the wrong things. I mean… you and I know they’re not the wrong things, but society restricts us.” 

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

“that’s a myth. your nails don’t grow, it just appears like it does. it’s ‘cause as we decay and shrivel, and our nails and stuff don’t, it just looks they’re still growing.” or so he thinks he remembers, anyway. what he doesn’t expect however, is yahnaa’s preference for after her own death and it’s not really something he wants to think about. not here and now and, not ever, actually. he liked her company. he liked the way she was simply so unapologetically herself. “it’s not gonna happen but, good to know?” he offers instead.

— 🩺 —

“Oh,” she remarks, setting her things down and turning her attention fully to the young man hiding in her office. “Well that probably doesn’t feel too good, does it?” 

Chest pain certainly wasn’t a very good thing and was probably one of the more common reasons that someone showed up in the ER, thinking they were suffering from a heart attack or something horrible like that. But more often than not the reason was much less severe, even if the confirmation of such wasn’t particularly reassuring for most. 

She knelt down before him, trying to offer a reassuring smile. 

“Like your heart is going to explode,” She repeats, pursing her lips thoughtfully as she considers that. “So definitely not a stabbing pain, or a sharp pain, or anything like that, right? Just kind of more like an achy feeling? When’d this all start?” 

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

the boy rests his chin upon the top of his knee, already feeling silly despite the evidence of his will to fix such a thing the way he’d obsessively checked the clinic for either the woman before him or the man who’d saved his brother. it’s an issue, one he’d rather ignore but, how does one ignore the way their chest tightens with the feeling of not being able to breathe?

“it’s like... my heart skips a beat and i can’t think straight. and it hurts and... and i don’t feel real any more. like i’ll suddenly come back into play like i’ve been on autopilot and i don’t know where have the day went.” liam swallows, bringing the already bruised knuckle of his finger to his mouth while his soft blue eyes can’t quite find it in them to meet jo’s.

🚑💨

It could be beneficial to cross-train anyone into knowing even basic medical care. It isn’t like the whole roster of medical staff is qualified for all types of emergencies, and formal training and education doesn’t exist. They’ll have to go back to this - hands on learning.

“I’d be more than happy to show you a few things. You’re also way smarter than me - you could probably learn even more from Jo or Holly. But basic first and emergency response? I have the reins in that category.” A double-edged sword that gives him the advantage in dire situations that requirement immediate stabilization of the patient, but presents to him the lack of knowledge in what to do to see to it they recover completely. It’s an anxiety he doesn’t like to have to handle, and he really hopes with all the new medical staff it won’t be as difficult a job to accomplish.

Liam is trustworthy and determined enough for this. He is one of the good ones. You don’t shit on people like that. “And even if don’t get a pass or anything, I can still show you things on the side. Good for being out there, if anything happens. If you’re cool with that?” He wants this to happen now: Liam is not that shy puppy dog tripping over uncoordinated feet in anyone’s wake anymore, like when he first arrived and was trying to get his footing.

“I’m excited to have Jo on the team, she’s a good one for sure. Sorta wish we had her when shit hit the fan. But you know, silver lining. I learned about how you can I can like, work cohesively and stuff. Even with walls between us. Maybe I’m too excited about this idea, I haven’t stopped talking.”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

seeing as fletcher falls into planning and considering all the things they could do already is more of an encouragement and a comfort than liam could even begin to explain. the opportunity to do more than place books on shelves day in and day out, to be somewhere he could actually be of benefit if ever needed or at least knowing a thing or two should things grow to be so dire... it felt better. it eased a million different weights pressing nails into his shoulders and, if he could gather up enough of a reason, he can’t imagine jesse saying no, either.

“did i tell you i was gonna go into forensics?” he asks, the fingers on one of his hands toying with the hair on the arm of the other. “so i... i like the science side of it. i don’t get grossed out, or anything. not any more. so maybe i could do something with that too, y’know? i mean, i know we’re not equipped but, just a thought.”

Bishan studied Liam for a moment. “If you’ve never had ginger tea before, I’ll warn you that it’s very very strong. Not a taste everyone likes, but it’s very good for your stomach. Kind of like a detox, but not the disastrous types,” he informed Liam, using a fan he’d gotten somewhere to help the hot tea to cool down a bit. 

He looked away, licking the inside of his teeth as he sat on his own chair. Luckily for Liam, he didn’t have any plans that day. He could just chill at home and take care of someone who shouldn’t have been drinking as much as he had. Bishan scoffed. Sure, he had those people. He felt like some people saw more in him than what went around about him, but so many people had yet heard the stories, some he kept close would still learn one day what type of person he had been. 

Still, he had to laugh when it came to the sun coming out of his but, that was funny. He wasn’t a huge fan of Fletcher, mostly because he deserved the attitude. “Maybe two,” he said. Maybe more, for now. “You’re right, though. I do see you as a kid,” he offered, grinning. “You’re pretty scrawny, remind me of myself when I was younger.”

                             ━━━━━━⋆✩⋆━━━━━━

with bishan’s explanation of what to maybe expect, liam looks back to him with a nod, accepting already that there’s a very good chance he’s going to be knocked off his feet by the unexpected taste and that alone might make bishan all the angrier with him for intruding on his space. a risk he’s willing to take, if it meant he didn’t have to feel so overwhelmingly terrible any more. at least long enough to make it to kai’s, anyway.

“you looked like me when you were younger?” liam asks, perking up with raised brows. bishan certainly didn’t now. even if he’d been wearing a shirt in liam’s company right now, he’d be able to tell bishan’s built. “how... how do you even... i can’t even flex. i tried. kai laughed at me.” the boy sighs and sinks into the couch, slightly sulking at the thought.

it’s a little bit romantic, really, how kai agrees to stay with him at his apartment instead of venturing out to join the drunken fun at the tavern. and he might just feel bad about it, if their reasoning’s weren’t the same. the pair were tired, too tired and exhausted after so much in such a short amount of time and, the idea of being surrounded by most of fairvale with loud noises and the suffocating feeling of not being able to move simply didn’t appeal.

and while it made him happy to know he’d get kai to himself for the night... well, it didn’t stop liam sitting on the couch beside him with a cheek puffed out and his lips a pout now, did it?