letters to you

How deep the wound was

How it shifted all my thoughts

How it molded me

To think it was just normal

For me to be used to pain

How alone I was

And how could it be easiest to ask

For me to forget

When they dont remember any of the pain

When they dont even regret

Finitas y esporadicas

Que refrescan mi rostro

Hacer cosas que no me gustan

Por que es lo mejor y nos hacen bien

A shadow

A mirage

Didnt meant to create it

Or dream with it

But it came

And I dont know

I think is already part of me

Makes me so sad

And it makes me cry everytime

Because I think it sees me

It sees my true self

My worth

Just like you did

But it is not you

Los sonidos suaves que me arrullan

Los sonidos contantes que se clavan en mi sien

Los sonidos que no me permiten concentrarme

La cabeza que me da vueltas

El silencio que no encuentro

When the start of it all

The birth of we all

Started with surrender

The general thought

The thread that joins it all

Is surrender

Surrender to you

Your love

Showing up

The fragile image

Of the child I used to be

Finally out

Has all my pain left me?

Has the trauma fully healed

Am I as broken as my parents before me

Has all of this work

All of your words

Finally mended all of my insides

The thread with your words

Engraved into every fiber of my being

Part of me

And you begin?

The construct of me

My body

And all that I am

What is the steady ground

The essence of my being

And how can i hold that in my hand

And remain me

Look at the small things

Look at the flowers, the grass and the ants

Insects sometimes unwanted

And never thought of

They serve a marvelous purpose

And in this tiny things

So much though from God was put in

So when we feel insignificant

Unwanted, and like the world is crushing on us

See him in the tiny things

The beautiful orchestra of nature

What makes a good man?

The love in his heart

To see everything out of love

The ability of not seeing fault in everything

To understand perspective

To relinquish control

Without losing himself

To find God in everything and everyone

To be silent and listen

Has my heart found you in all of this pain

Thankfully you are not as scared as I am

Can I raise a man after your heart

Because that is what I want

A gentle heart

Eyes that see you

Everywhere and in anyone

Wise mind

And an anchor in you

Weed out the past

May all that is left be

The roots in you

The love you have given me

How you have cared for me

And how you have saved me

May I be capable of showing that

The grip on who I am

The steady ground

Could you be my anchor?

The roots under my feet

Grab my hand

Embrace me hold

And make me capable

Just some images that would change our lives

Just the shock of the unseen

It just feels like a dream

Chasing you

Trying to cling to you

Like someone who is about to fade

To run away from me

But the truth is you dont

You dont run away

Your are here to stay

You are my sweet strength

My everlasting father

The castle and the rock

And I do want my heart to stay quiet

Steady

Calmed and rooted in you

To see you like the dawn

Full face bathed in your light

To be able to really see you

Grasp all of you

No longer clenching my fists

But see you

Feel you