lets try this again

Was I frustrated? Yes. Very.

Did I let it show? Probably because I have a bad poker face. I am overwhelmed with my current workload and cannot commit 100% to this new project.

My co-worker said that my boss said something like [I] am probably so mad at her, and she can’t win, because if she doesn’t include me in things I get mad and I get annoyed when she does include me in things.

This is hurtful in so many levels because it makes me seem like a controlling bitch that bosses her boss around.

It also demonstrates a fundamental misunderstanding she has about the entire team, but specifically me…

I get annoyed when she doesn’t communicate effectively with me and the team, which happens quite a bit. We often find out about initiatives and projects that directly involve us second hand. What she doesn’t understand is that I’m not asking to have a hand in every single project, I’m just asking that she communicates with the team.

I also get annoyed when I’m volunteered for projects that I really don’t need to be involved in solely because she wants our program to have some sort of control (this project in particular can be handled by our fiscal team, I don’t need to be involved.)

She constantly cancels our team meetings or fills them with aimless chatter, when it would be great to use them as an opportunity to report out on things like this, updates from leadership, upcoming initiatives, etc.

I’ve thought and said this before, but I think we may be approaching the end of Linus’s time.

For those who don’t know, Linus was born in my garage in May 2025. I ended up finding a home for his siblings, but Linus made my home his home. He’s always been such a special cat. At around 6 months old linus began displaying weird symptoms - mainly, he began to walk funny. That quickly deteriorated into not being able to use his hind legs, though he still had full bladder and bowel function. In December, I took him to UC Davis for a neuro exam and after some testing it was determined he has a lysomal storage disease called MPS, which is very rare. So rare that nobody could tell me how long his life expectancy is.

MPS kitties are missing an enzyme that allows them to eliminate glycosaminoglycans (GAGs) from their bodies, leading to them accumulate in cells throughout the body. Over time, this can cause abnormal bone growth, stiffness, cloudy eyes, excess mucus production, heart and liver issues, facial differences, and more.

Linus eventually was able to walk again starting in mid-January and he seemed happy! He is different, for sure, his gate was a little stiffer and he was stuffy sometimes, but overall seemed happy and healthy.

He’s now 14 months old. He has recently lost some mobility and seems much stiffer and the mucus production has become a hindrance. Just yesterday and today he stopped meeting me at the food bowl every time I walked through a door, which is the most troubling part of it all. He is also sleeping more.

I knew this disease was degenerative and it would eventually lead to me having to put Linus down, if only because he was no longer comfortable. I have an appointment scheduled for tomorrow morning for a quality of life and wellness check.

It’s just so hard to know when the time is right.

Highest sneeze month: February (almond blossoms come out in February where I live, so this makes sense) with 49 sneezes

Lowest sneeze month: January with 35 sneezes

For a minute I thought I might surpass February’s record in June, but I fell short by two sneezes.

1. The big stressful event that I’ve been planning has finally come and gone and it was pretty successful! So happy.

2. The countdown to my 10-day vacation is on!

3. I had lunch with a friend today - we had kabobs and hummus then stopped at a new cafe for coffee and it was delicious.

Don’t get me started with the facility vendor! They were operated by the county until recently, but now they’re operated by the local irrigation district. Now everything is covered in even more red tape some how. For an event at a local lake, they want our visitors to pay for parking (even though we’re paying for the facility), they want an exorbitant amount of insurance, they want proof of insurance from our vendors. They fucking suck. None of this is in the spirit of community.

Stupid fucking risk management can’t follow instructions and can’t get the insurance right even though they are laid out in an email.