Soooo…. Is everyone back here

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Soooo…. Is everyone back here

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Cate Blanchett in Carol (2015) dir. Todd Haynes
Why Can’t ‘We’ Live Happily Ever After, Too? (Ronald Forsythe, New York Times; Feb 23, 1969)
“Blanchett’s performance is utterly right. Her hauteur and elegance matched with fear and self-doubt. When I first saw Carol at Cannes this year, she reminded me of a predatory animal suddenly struck with a tranquilizer dart. On watching it again, what I noticed was Blanchett continually touching her face and stroking her hair as she speaks to Therese: a “poker tell” of desire.”
💖 Favorite romantic w/w films of the decade 💖
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the older I get the more dog I become
obsessed with being given affection and being told im doing a good job… losing my damn mind every time I get to go for a nice walk
TERRIFIED of the doorbell
Patayin nyo na ako please.
This Stranger I Met 03
I don’t want anybody else.

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soliloquy
Even if you don’t feel like it, you are worth it. I promise.
Make yourself a priority.
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A family friend of ours messaged me today, saying that she was just with my mom. Sabi daw ng mom ko, sa mga anak nya, ako lang maaasahan. Haha. Medyo nakakatuwa na at least, ganito yung pananaw sa’kin ni mama.
Pero in my head, I felt like I had to be like this to compensate for being gay. Hahaha. Yung effort ko to ease my parents’ disappointment in me was so big, it’s been an everyday struggle.
Our family friend added that I should give my parents more time to come around. I said, medyo hindi naman na ako nag-eexpect. And she told me, wag ganun daw. Don’t say anything daw kung negative.
I haven’t spoken about it. How do you have hope about it if for the longest time, wala? How do you forgive?
Sana hindi na nila matahin pa kung ano at sino ang mahal ko.
Anyway.
-
On another note, I fucking miss you, okay? And I feel helpless because I don’t know what to do about it. What happened? I’m so confused.
I want to hold you close, run my fingers through your hair, and just feel your warmth. My heart would be rested.
But it’s a selfish, selfish thought.
I can only wish you well.