I do like that this pandemic has got us all greeting each other like Jane Austen characters- “You are well, I hope? And your family? All in good health?”

mentally eel

mental eelness

we take the naps we think we deserve

The worst part about parallel parking is the witnesses

being in your early twenties is like [grocery shopping alone] [having instant noodles for dinner] [remembering random details about that one friend you haven't spoken to in five years] [feeling overwhelming guilt for every purchase that isn't strictly "necessary"] [having midday naps] [finding out through facebook that the girl who was mean to you in high school has a husband and a baby] [falling a little in love with every stranger on public transport] [pretending you're not afraid of being alone] [wondering when you'll feel like a fully realized person] [listening to bands you liked in middle school] [blinking and it's suddenly december] [failing to imagine yourself ten years from now] [feeling like you're running out of time]

no offense but the us military is the biggest terrorist organization in the world

annoying sun clingy moon bitch rising

bastard’s degree

bastard of sciences

motherfucker of arts

Very fun to be a lesbian and have men mean objectively nothing to you

Does anyone else feel, like, a weird inhibition against starting new TV shows?  Like, there are shows I want to watch but when I think about sitting down to start it something in me goes “no you can’t just do that.”  What am i waiting for?  I feel like I need to prepare?  Brain:  You have to wait.  Me:  Wait for what???  Brain:  WAIT