I live to spite [my mind].

I had my expectations low. But, I do love a good Sherlock Holmes adaptation. I was in no way disappointed. I went into the show mostly blind. All I knew was that it took place when Sherlock Holmes was younger, as can be inferred from the title.

For the first few minutes of episode 1, I was a bit concerned that it would be lacking a Watson for Sherlock's... Sherlock-ness. This concern was - unfortunately - not needed. I say unfortunately because I am not at all prepared for the level of heartbreak that will occur in the next season if this show gets renewed.

The dynamic between James and Sherlock is incredibly compelling. They play off of each other well, and are in many ways opposites. Sherlock is, well, Sherlock Holmes. He's not super great with people and is pretty uptight. James, on the other hand, is a friendly, flirty jokester. Both of them are incredibly intelligent.

They meet each other after a lecture, and go to a party together, and then get accused of a crime. At this point they have only known each other for minimal time. More stuff happens, and Sherlock gets locked up for a murder (which he didn't commit, for the record).

And James is there to break him out. How long have they known each other?

It's just...

You can tell that they care about each other. You can tell that they're friends.

But, they are also different. Sherlock has a strong moral code. Despite the pickpocketing, the breaking and entering, and breaking out of prison, he has a respect for the law. He has a respect for human life. James kills a man (in self defense) and later admits that he felt no remorse. He craves power and recognition. He takes things a bit less seriously than he should - Sherlock accuses him of treating everything more like a game than like reality. James cares about Sherlock, but in the end they have conflicting goals.

Watching them together on screen, I found myself imagining them going home after the events of the show and having a nice happy life. They'll be friends. They'll go to university together. They'll confide in each other and continue to solve mysteries and get into trouble.

I found myself imagining that they were Holmes and Watson.

But they aren't. They will be friends, probably for a bit longer. They will joke and get into trouble but their words will grow harsher and their ambitions will collide. James will realize that in order to have the power that he dreams about, sacrifices must be made.

And soon that friendship will turn into hatred.

They will face each other one final time on the top of a waterfall and they will fight.

(James taught Sherlock how to fight, didn't he.)

And they will fight. And they will fall.

And I find part of myself wishing that they both die, in that moment. That their story ends with them together.

But it does not. Because they are not destined to be friends.

They are a friendship doomed by the narrative. They will get no happy ending, and no happy life. They will grow apart. One will become an agent against crime, the other will become the one in the center of it.

And you know what? I'm here for it.

okay so i split them up into the characters (i love making lists)

James:

NFWMB

Arsonist’s lullaby

Angel of small death and the codeine scene

It will come back

Talk

From eden

Butchered tongue

Sherlock:

Take me to church

Like real people do

Nobody’s soldier

Abstract (psychopomp)

First time

Both/either:

unknown/ nth

Sedated