hunger makes me a modern girl

I don't think Amelia has done anything too wrong with the Cass stuff, her and Toni weren't together so its not like she cheated. It's not going to help things and its obviously going to set them back but it'll be interesting to see where Amelia goes from there and how she deals with the confronting feelings of knowing someone chose her and now she's maybe lost them (i don't think she has but I assume she might think that). I think Toni did the right thing in hearing Celine out but ultimately given they did have a life together and it seems like Celine was actually willing to make an effort but obviously she is not who Toni wants. I'm sure Toni will be hurt but its not something that cannot be overcome.

I don't like the Cass stuff simply because I'd have preferred to see what it would be like to see Amelia with someone who chose her and them navigate their life together and work through their stuff together. Amelia is very complex and it would have been nice to see her develop a relationship with Toni in the next season and what that would look like. How would Amelia reconciles her old flight mentality with the conflicting feelings of maybe discovering/accepting she does want some kind of domestic life with someone like Toni who maybe she feels sees all facets of her more acceptingly than others have and how Amelia copes with getting what she wants and if she could embrace that. I suspect instead we'll get some dragged out will they wont they finally get together rather than the more interesting dynamic of actually seeing them together navigating a life together and the baggage and tough choices that comes with that.

Sorry for this being so long but I really enjoy your thoughts on Amelia and her character journey and evolution since we first saw her on PP til now.

hi! don't apologise at all for the length i love these discussions and especially when it's not me shouting into a void haha 🥰 i'm glad you like my posts

first off i 100% agree she didn't do anything wrong and that they will be fine eventually. in the scene where she asks toni to choose her they explicitly said they hadn't defined anything, and with toni literally avoiding her and not making a choice i don't blame her for going for a hookup. obviously the timing was diabolical though. but yeah, having no build up and cass randomly in her apartment is the cheapest drama possible which is to be expected. i hope they don't get her even more involved with amelia. i don't usually get the rage at love triangles but i just finished watching the oc where they had an inability to create drama outside of that and i'm a bit sick of it 😭 i would have been less peeved at celine joining grey sloan à la addison if they wanted to continue the mess.

i find that perspective on the marriage thing super interesting. i can see that being the case, seeing as with owen we're supposed to take her rushing into that marriage as a symptom of the tumor, whereas she never actually got to the altar with anyone else. and her seeing the marriage that way despite the tumor and previously calling herself a terrible wife was surprising to me. but of all the characters to change their mind on such things i wouldn't be surprised if she does decide she wants domesticity. i keep thinking recently about how in s17/18 she seemed to equate the specific situation of lockdown with 4 children while meredith was dying and lack of access to her usual support system with domesticity. but then she moved back into the house with her sisters and the same kids after her and link broke up (until it burned down lol). i know it's not the same as being their primary caregiver, but still. and with toni having a kid too it would be something to get into.

i mean it was always the interpretation i had, but her saying marriage IS a more intentional commitment to someone and was different to her other relationships confirms she wasn't being honest about why she didn't want it with him. in 17x11 she's trying to sway him towards not wanting it by saying it doesn't lock a family in, and 18x01, she says 'why is your only option marriage? it's archaic, and it only really gets you tax reductions, if that'. so link interprets her no and her reasoning as, i would still be with you if you didn't want to get married. then she tells him she loves him and kisses him after he says he wants a lifetime with her.

it was always clear him wanting more kids and the stuff with fostering luna was a bigger issue, so even if kai wasn't in the picture and he went to tell her he didn't need to marry her, she probably still would've turned him down. i guess what it changes for me is i thought she was being truthful about not believing in marriage AND the mismatch of what they want in life being the main issue, but this shows it was only really the latter.

she kind of broaches it in the blow out fight saying 'i was losing myself in something i did not, could not want', and claims he knew this, but from what we see canonically she did not communicate that part of her decision to him at all beforehand. they show her talking about it to owen, richard, addison, and in meetings, her saying she 'can't tell him' and that she's not mad at him, only herself. i absolutely cannot stand how hard he pushed for it, and how he didn't even look at her reaction when he brought up what he wanted from the future, but i do feel a little sad for him that she never clearly communicated it to him and is now speaking more positively about the institution and implying she never wanted that intentional commitment with him, especially after everything she asked from him with the paternity question.

AMELIA SHEPHERD in Grey's Anatomy 22.18

AMELIA SHEPHERD in Grey's Anatomy 22.17