LambOfRegress

First Impression

I first got into Digital Circus three years ago when a friend sent me teasers of the show. Ive followed the creators behind Glitch on their side channel and have known Gooseworx since the Undertale days.

When the pilot dropped I got pulled into the world immediately. I was dragged into it, I dragged people into it, and it blew up. I was ecstatic as an Indie enjoyer to see the project grow. As each episode came out, I was there on the day of release.

When The Final Act came to theaters I went immediately after work. I took my Jax Burger plush, did not get the bucket (F;$k!!!), sat through the whole thing, and left absolutely floored. I drove home with little music and went to my couch, collapsed on my Jax pile, and cried for the first time in a long while.

Finale Thoughts

My first impression of the movie was fully emotional. I didn’t go in expecting answers of the lore, and I think that influenced the way I see the finale. Most of this Review is AFTER my second watch from the release today.

The finale overall is a mess. Pacing is everywhere, emotions are zigzagging into chaos. It’s very confusing snd hard to understand. And I LOVE it.

The story of digital circus feels like a cycle that needs rewatching and spiraling deeper for answers. Watching Jax’s mind felt like a true look into the Circus and what it was. It was really interesting to see the characters in a perspective outside our main girl Pomni.

The lore in this episode is a strange one. The Caine lore makes more sense on rewatch when you realize the scene is a present / flashback moment. It’s hard to get a grip on the ideas sometimes because the lack of communication is harsh.

(I also did not like the social media stuff but thats because I hate social media in any form of content unless it’s done in a specific way. This is a nitpick, bleh.)

As a finale to the series, it felt like a confusing yet oddly satisfying end. I think that’s the time the ending was going for. As Gooseworx said, “Find meaning im a stagnant life”. Nothing is satisfying enough to make you stop living, so the show goes on without us and were left back to our world.

OKAY THATS ENOUGH ITS TIME TO TALK JAX.

This is all like personal story mixed with a character analysis and isnt important so skip if you like.

Fun fact i actually hated Jax up until episode 6. I thought he was annoying and pissed me off a lot. I hated seeing fanart and memes- everything. My favorite character was Zooble and they’re still my #1 favorite design and overall character in the series.

Also because I’m Non-binary and wanted to do Tattoo Work for a few years and also liked the idea of bartending. Felt very called out by their existence.

Anyway- When episode 6 “they all get guns” released, I felt myself start to grow intrigued by Jax. Then episode 7.

The look into Jax’s head as everyone slowly moves on without him. He’s miserable, everyone’s clearly happy without him, and even Zooble comes up and wacks him. Yay. The moment he laid in the bed where th arms crawled from the darkness ans he began to abstract, my view on the series seemed to change.

I’ve always been interested wirh abstraction. Ive posted my artwork on here before about how my brain perceives colors and shapes im this abstract colorful way. The moment Jax began to abstract, and the colors filled the screen, it felt like my brain fell onto the screen and finally made sense. That’s the moment I began to look into Jax more.

Episode 8.

I’ve been a fan of I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream for years. I don’t remember exactly when I got into it, but I was specifically interested in the Radio Drama and the Book. Both of which came from Ted’s perspective, which most fans for the IHNMAIMS theory beloved Jax was like Ted.

Caine started to torture. Like AM and his twisted adventures and tortures each one was personalized for each person to suffer as much as possible.

Jax was flayed. Ripped by skin. I found it interesting the animation team said they hand animated it because they wanted the rips to be perfect. They unironically added more torture to Jax because they liked how it looked. Theres something interesting there.

As the Finale pops up it’s time for me to address a chicken egg in the room. The egg is Jax, we’re talking Trans Jax theory.

I became aware of Trans Jax WAY back during the Pilot days. Gooseworx would post artwork and vague posts and people would run with it. I saw it a lot and was very curious on the direction the show would take if Goose did in fact go with it.

At the time I was TransMasc. Extremely uncomfortable with the girl me, trying to hide in the societal normal, blah. It took me until the recent years outside of school did I identify as Non-Binary and begin to wear more femme presenting clothes.

One thing I wore when Masc was maid dresses. I wanted to be a man but flirted around in costumes and dress up. When I saw Jax in the maid dress- the anger quickly sliding away as he just wears the dress and is fluid with- it felt familiar.

Rabbits, Gender, Masculinity and the brain are all part of Jax. It’s also weirdly a party of me.