Yet do I fear thy nature

The older characters, established professionals in their middle age, are very aware of the relative youth/inexperience of certain other characters and consequently protective of them. This plays out most directly between Murray and Demodus Blix, but is also visible in the way other characters behave towards Occtis at times- Thaisha, sometimes, but also Murray, who seems to have a high degree of sensitivity towards this dynamic, as a teacher.

Azune, while fully an adult (described 27-28) and only relatively young, was forced to grow up quite early and IMO clearly covets the protection and feeling of personal responsibility extended towards the youngest ones. After release from an acutely high-pressure situation, Azune frequently falls apart and, consciously or no, seeks comfort from an authority figure. I can't remember the episode, but the main instance of this conversation occurs around the testimony to the Einfasens, when he breaks down to Murray and directly says "I can't do this anymore," to which she essentially responds, "I know, but you have to bear it a bit longer."

It's interesting to watch, because Murray clearly understands that Azune is crying out for help, but also knows that he is essential and that they (they being the Magpies, and the larger nascent rebellion) cannot afford to relieve him. Concurrently, Murray is expressing her reluctance to expose Demodus to any of this- he's just a boy, and her student. She feels the weight of her obligation to keep him safe, and while she wishes she could help Azune, it is not a duty she feels in the same way. In his fellow Schemers, Azune has friends and even a pseudo-father figure, in Hal, who he can lean on, but he is an adult who is ultimately responsible for himself, and there is nobody in the world who is obligated to keep Azune safe. His yearning for a certain kind of protection can't be fulfilled.

https://wheelofnames.com/kch-gkt

this is a really really cool idea! Thanks!!!

You can't do this for a week!

You have the literal sunset in your eyes. That light isn't fading, it's just right on the horizon. And it hovers there. All right?

And then you have to go into mortal peril once again, for this cause you've altered yourself for over and over again, and you ask for what you need to come out alive. Maybe for the first time in a long time, you're a little selfish. You want to live (for your own sake, for the first time in how long?). Can't someone you need risk a little, too? And you're turned down and suddenly it's all too much, you can't handle it, you're always strong because you need to be, and you can't help breaking down but maybe if you do it right, if you find just the right way to express what you're feeling, you'll get what you need.