Life Chronicles

Three drinks deep and you were loosing yourself to the beat to the music, Han pressed against your back as you both danced to let off the weeks steam. It wasn't the usual for you to actually go to clubs but after a small disagreement with both Changbin and Chan you knew Han needed to go somewhere they would never be so a fucking nightclub it was.

You had done most of the drinking Han sticking to soda even though he was upset since you both knew he would get tipsy in less than a drink and stone cold drunk after two, but that didn't stop his enthusiasm to just escape into the anonymity of the dancing tipsy bodies that packed out the dance floor. His hands were firmly holding your hips as you moved tethering you to him despite the fact that you were not going to ditch him in his hour of need.

"I'm not going anywhere Ji promise" you called over your shoulder as he pulled you even closer to him.

"I know but I don't like how that guy is looking at you" he explained in your ear as his fingers dug into your short skirt.

"No one is looking at me Ji, I'm just here dancing with my best friend who is mad at his best friends because of a song" you pulled his hands from your hips and spun to face him letting him grab you once more.

"Oh yeah well the guy with the tattoos definitely wants to fuck you" he complained until you placed one of your hands on his chest.

"Well I don't want to fuck him" you grinned "I want another drink" you took his hand and pulled him through the packed floor to the bar where you plopped yourself down on an empty stool letting Han cage you in with his body. You had always known him to be protective of you but tonight was more than usual he would normally just tell you to be safe and have fun but the obvious jealousy and the slight aggression that he spoke with was doing things to you that you didn't expect but were starting to like.

"Oh here comes the motherfucker now" he snapped wrapping one arm around your waist possessively.

"Ji it's just you and me tonight, forget him and just keep your eyes on me. Unless you find someone you want to take home" you grinned cheekily making him roll his eyes at you. After another drink for you and half a beer for him he was at least smiling his hand still firmly attached to your wait holding you against him even though the other guy had totally gotten the hint and disappeared back into the crowd without even speaking to you.

"You going to tell me what the argument was over?" you raised your eyebrow at him as he took one last large gulp of his beer before pushing it away from him.

"No" he laughed "not ever going to tell you that".

"Why not?" you pouted batting your eyelashes at him making him giggle.

"Because you would get mad as fuck at me" he grinned back, you could see the alcohol affecting him more as the time ticked on he was now starting to relax now so you had gotten him to at least the tipsy point now.

"Why on earth would I get mad? your 3Racha arguments have nothing to do with me" you shook your head at him like he was losing his mind and dropped it until he was ready to talk about it which would probably be tomorrow morning at this rate. His hand squeezed where it was resting on your thigh as he seemed to be pondering what to do next.

"Come dance with me again?" His toothy smile and puppy eyes made it impossible to say no so you didn't you just laughed and nodded as he helped your from the stool and led you back onto the dance floor his hands not leaving your body even once you found enough room for you to actually move around in. With his hand splayed against your stomach you both moved in sync with each other and the music until the song changed to something decidedly sexier his hips pressing against you as he encourage you to grind to the music, his breath fanning across your bare neck and shoulder.

"Ji?" you groaned feeling his hands begin to wander from across your stomach to one holding your hip and the other grazing up your rib cage until it was ghosting along the underside of your breast. In your entire friendship he had never touched you like this and you weren't sure if is was the alcohol or the frustration from earlier but you liked it more than you were ever going to admit as you felt wetness pool between your thighs.

"Tell me to stop touching you and I will" he groaned into your ear rolling his body to the beat shameless it letting you feel the semi he was now sporting while he continued running his hands all over you. Your breathing sped up as the warmth started igniting in your belly and you were sure you didn't want him to stop even though you probably should, Han took your lack of answer as permission to do as he pleased now gently cupping your breast and massaging it as you moved making you shiver against him before he continued its path up your body resting it loosely around your throat to pull your body even closer.

You knew he could feel your body reacting to him by the way you gasped but when you accidentally moaned when his lips met your shoulder you knew it was going too far for you to be still in public even though the people around you seemed to either be enjoying the show you were putting on or ignoring you completely.

"Ji we're in public" you pleaded making him stop his movements.

"I can fix that" He smirked his voice deeper than you had ever heard it before he pulled you from the dance floor and out the front of the club. As soon as the cool night air hit you he stopped crashing his lips into yours messily his lips and tongue desperate to claim yours.

"My place is closer than the dorm" you breathed when your lips parted.

"Can't wait that long" he grinned wickedly once again taking your hand and leading you down the street for another minute before turning into a deserted alley between the buildings where you could still hear the music from the club you have just vacated.

"Need this now, need you now" he growled kissing you again and backing you against the rough brick wall not even giving you a moment to think as he hiked your tight skirt up and cupped your heat.

"Ji, you've had too much to drink" you gasped feeling yourself grind against his hand the wet fabric of your underwear obvious to him as his eyes closed and he took a deep breath.

"I'm not drunk I just need you, I've always needed you" he admitted sliding his fingers past the damp fabric to slip between your folds "Feels like you need me too". Whimpering at the feeling of his fingertips teasing your slit he kissed you again groaning into your mouth as your mouth fell open when his fingers found your clit.

"Just like that Ji" you mewled bucking your hips into his fingers as his circled the swollen bud before he replaced them with his thumb his fingers moving to tease your dripping entrance before his pushed two of them in without any resistance curving them to find the spongy spot that made your eyes rolled back.

"I'm going to make you come on my fingers baby, then I'm going to fuck you" he whispered into your ear making you clench around him moving to kiss down your jaw and along your throat.

"Please Ji, please" you whined as you hurtled towards your release.

"I never would have guessed you would let me fuck you like a whore in an alleyway" he muttered against your throat making you moan loudly "Gonna show the boys who's pussy this is. Let them watch you cum on my cock like a good whore".

"Jisung!" you wailed breathlessly as you came hard hearing him groan as he helped you through your high pulling his fingers from you and sucking them clean before kissing you deeply his tongue sliding against yours tasting of beer and your own juices, while he tugged his cock free of his jeans and hooked one of your legs around his hips.

"My girl now" he moaned impaling you with his length as he fucked into your still quivering walls deeply. "Mine".

"Yours Ji" you whimpered as he snapped his hips into yours feeling lightheaded with each thrust.

"Only mine, they cant have you, only my cock can fuck this tight little cunt" he babbled as you felt another orgasm crash over you at his words you whole body convulsing as he continued to chase his own high biting down on your shoulder to quieten his groaning.

"Fuck baby" he moaned as he came his warm seed filling you before staring at you panting eyes glassy and satisfied he slowly pulled his softening length from you before helping you to stand again.

"Ji" you whispered your voice hoarse from your unabashed moaning "what was the fight about?" you pulled your skirt back into place watching him closely

"I don't want to share you with them" he admitted almost shyly his voice quiet "I want you to myself, I'm in love with you".

"You love me?" you repeated smiling as you leaned forward to kiss him, trying to pour everything you felt for him into it even if you weren't sure it was love.

"Can I please take you home and take care of you" he smiled "I need to make sure my girlfriend is pampered after letting me treat her so roughly".

a/n: Thank you for reading even though this one wasn't as good as my others, as always your likes, reblogs and comments keep me motivated xx

Oh. He really likes the way you say his name. He thinks he'd like to hear you say it again.

And as if that wasn't enough, you fit into their group seamlessly. You crack jokes with Jisung, get along well with Seungmin, and at one point even managed to fluster Minho, which practically made you a god in Changbin's books.

Then at one point in the night you get a bit hot, so you take off your jacket. And when Changbin spots the tattoos on your skin, he chokes on his drink. Literally.

"Are you okay?" You ask, worried and startled at how Changbin was hacking and coughing for his life.

When he finally gets to breathe, Changbin frantically nods his head. His eyes were teary as he reassures you, "I'm fine, I'm fine, It just- went down the wrong pipe. You, uh- you have nice tattoos."

"Oh!" You exclaim, looking so much like an excited puppy that Changbin feels himself grin. "Thank you so much! I'm really proud of them."

And Changbin opens his mouth, about to ask the story of each tattoo and how you came to decide to get them so you just talk and talk and talk to him, but then Hyunjin is grabbing your attention and calling you over before he can say a word. Changbin tries not to huff.

You send Changbin another soft smile before you go though, and it eases him a little. Just a little.

For the rest of the night, Changbin watches as you coo at Felix and play games with Jeongin, fitting in with the group like you've been there for years already. And when it was time to eat, you weren't shy, constantly gushing about how good the food was. But even as you stuffed your mouth, you never forgot to take care of the younger kids and made sure they were full.

Changbin was slowly but surely falling in love.

Something about you just made Changbin want to know more and more about you. He wanted to know what made you happy, sad, annoyed. What you liked to do before bed and if you had any weird rituals. He wanted to talk with you all night, under the covers, in the quiet night of a room.

He just wanted to know you.

The final nail in the coffin happens immediately right after dinner. You're all full, right on the verge of a food coma, bodies scattered all over the floor. Content sighs can be hear everywhere.

You stretch like a cat as you sit, pat your tummy, then say, "I'm going to have to work twice as hard in the gym tomorrow."

Changbin freezes. Chan notices his wide eyed look and snorts.

Changbin slowly turns to you, lips parting in disbelief. You catch his eye and innocently tilt your head in question, as if you didn't just say the one thing that sealed the deal for him.

Just as you were about to ask Changbin if something was wrong, Changbin sputters out, "Marry me."

This time, it's your turn to freeze.

Minho and Jisung almost fall off the couch laughing. Chan is chuckling beside them. Felix and Jeongin have that wide eyed, startled look on their faces, while Hyunjin was pulled out his phone to record. Seungmin is making cheering noises. Changbin is as red as a fucking tomato.

That wasn't what he wanted to say!

Well- kind of. He did want to marry you, just not... now. When you haven't even started dating yet. When he hasn't even told you he likes you and would want to get to know you more! When he- it's-

It's hopeless. He's hopeless. He's thinking off all the things he wants to say but not a single word comes out of his mouth, stunned to silence as you and him stare at each other.

And then, just when Changbin starts to think he just fucked up whatever chance he had with you, you start to blush.

A pretty pink blush that starts at your ears and goes to your cheeks then all the way down to your neck.

Oh. Now you were red all over, and Changbin's heart jumpstarts with hope again.

You squirm in your seat, shyly meeting Changbin's eyes and stuttering as you say, "A-at least take me out on a date first?"

That's... not a rejection.

The rest of the kids make loud, teasing cheers, and somebody shoves Changbin, but he can't take his eyes off you. You were brushing so prettily and yet you never broke eye contact with Changbin, still facing him head on. It gives him the courage to get his act together.

So Changbin snaps out of his daze. He clears his throat and fixes his posture. He's been trailing after you like a lost puppy the entire night, eyes full of heart but never making a move.

Now that he knows he's got your attention, he's doing everything on earth to keep it.

minho looks at you with wide eyes. “is this you finally agreeing?”

“not so fast there, buddy. hear me out,” you say with a laugh. “i’ll dance with you, but it has to be on my terms, i don't wanna embarrass myself. so that means i'm going to be the one teaching you.”

“ok, you’ve piqued my interest,” he responds, eyebrow raised in curiosity. “what did you have in mind?”

“how about a private bachata lesson taught by yours truly?” you say with a grin as you motion to yourself.

“bachata?” he inquires. “hm, that could be fun…let’s do it! we can use my studio friday night.”

“really?!” you ask. you hadn't really expected the dancing king to actually agree to letting someone else try to teach him, so you had honestly set yourself up for him to say no.

“yeah, i think this’ll be a good time,” he says with a grin. “plus if this is what it takes to finally get a dance class with you, then i’ll take what i can get.”

friday finally comes, and you’re increasingly nervous about this “private lesson.” even though you’ve known how to dance bachata for what feels like your whole life, you’ve never taught it to anyone else. also, even though you’ve been friends for so long, minho has actually never seen you dance. you’d be lying if you said your heart wasn't racing as you walked into his studio. it was a pretty cozy space, very private with thankfully no windows where prying eyes could look in.

“hey,” you say shyly.

“oh hey!” he says with a smile as he makes his way over to you. “you ready?”

“as i’ll ever be,” you reply with a nervous laugh. “i made a playlist of some songs that i thought might be good for us to dance to.”

“oh sweet, let me hook up your phone,” he says as he takes your phone to connect it to the stereo system. he presses play as the familiar sound of “propuesta indecente” by romeo santos echoes through the space.

you spend quite a bit of time just teaching him the basics, how to step correctly, how to turn correctly, how to move your hips correctly. unsurprisingly, he catches on pretty fast, so you move on to teaching him some partner work. as he takes his hands in yours, you show him how to take everything he’s learned and put it into moving with a partner. giggles are exchanged as he does his best to follow you, but once he finally finds the right pace and rhythm and gets used to the movements, you’re dancing like you’ve been doing this together for years.

this is when you realize just how sensual this dancing style can feel. you always knew bachata could be a very sexual dance, but in the past. when you’ve danced with other people, it never really became sensual, it was just like any other dance. but when minho moves like this and when you move together with him, you feel your cheeks growing a little warm. you’ve never really felt this way about him before. obviously, he's a very attractive man, but you've only ever seen him as a friend. ‘it’s just the music and the dancing, it doesn't actually mean anything,’ you try and convince yourself.

this convincing works a bit until he starts to get even more comfortable with the moves and pulls you closer to him, hips moving together in harmony as you both step on count while his knee occasionally slots itself between your legs as he moves, bringing him somehow even closer to you. the butterflies in your stomach are growing by the second, and you’re finding it harder to maintain eye contact with each passing song.

it only gets even harder to remain calm when he decides to turn you around so your back is pressed again him, hips now moving against each other with each step as your ass grinds on him. you're thankful that you're facing away from the wall of mirrors in the dance studio because you feel your cheeks growing red at the intimate contact. you’re wondering if minho is feeling the same level of tension, but you get the gut feeling he is as his hands let go of yours and trace their way down your body until they land at your hips, allowing him to hold you even closer now.

you dance like this for a painstakingly long time, an ache growing between your thighs with each passing minute. he finally turns you back around and you continue to dance while facing each other, movements becoming more and more minimal until you're both standing still as music continues to ring throughout the studio. there's something in the air, a feeling between you two that you cant quite place as your eyes dance across his face, desperate to try and figure out what he’s thinking. you notice his eyes wander down to your lips before glancing back up to meet your gaze.

‘fuck it,’ you think as you lock your lips onto his. you feel him tense up under your touch, but he quickly relaxes and deepens the kiss. his hands grab onto your hips as your fingers tangle in his hair. his lips are soft and supple, pressing against yours like they were made to be there. almost as quickly as you kissed him, you push away from him, the realization of what's going on finally hitting you.

“minho, what are we doing?” you ask, panic slightly evident in your voice. “we’re best friends, what are we doing?”

“do you want to stop?” he asks, eyes darting across your face to figure out what to do.

“no,” you admit.

“good, me neither,” he states matter of factly. “we both trust each other and we both want this, so we can figure out the logistics later, but right now, i just need you.”

his words make you press your lips back onto his. without breaking contact, he slowly guides you so you're laying on your back on the ground so he’s hovering over you. he begins to press soft kisses along your jawline before he works his way down to your neck, nibbling and sucking occasionally. your hands tangle in his dark locks as his hand reaches up under your shirt to squeeze your breast over your bra, making you let you a slight moan.

“can i take this off?” he asks as he gives the band of your bra a slip snap against your skin, lips still attached to your neck.

“yeah,” you let out in a breathy moan.

he detaches his mouth from you to lift your shirt over your head. you arch your back to allow him access to the clasp of your bra.

“minho, wait,” you interject, making him stop his movements entirely. “what if someone comes in?”

“they won't,” he responds. “i locked the door before we even started dancing.”

you nod in response before he finishes ridding you of your bra. almost immediately, he attaches his mouth to one of your breasts, licking, kissing, and sucking all over it while his hand rolls your other nipple between his thumb and index finger.

“oh god,” you moan. he hums against your skin in contentment, loving the affect he has on you from just playing with your tits.

you reach down and palm him through his sweats. you feel your pussy clench around nothing when you feel how hard he is. you can also tell he is incredibly well endowed. all of minho's ex partners would rave about how good sex was with him, and now you're beginning to see why. he moans against your breast as you to continue to rub him over the material.

the feeling of desire in you is growing rapidly and you find yourself growing impatient. you begin bucking your hips up into his, craving any sort of friction. he clearly gets the hint as he immediately strips you of your clothes before ridding himself of his.

he peppers kisses down your torso, his mouth making its way to where you want him most.

“wait,” you pant out.

“are you ok?” he stops, looking up at you, and you nod in response. “can i taste you? i wanna taste you so bad.”

his words make you grow even wetter. “believe me, i want that so badly too, but i need you inside me. now.”

he crawls his way back up your body before placing a gentle kiss on your cheek. “are you sure? do you feel prepped enough?”

your hand reaches up to caress his cheek. you appreciate how thoughtful he is.

“oh yeah” you say with a slight giggle. “i've been turned on for so long tonight that i promise i feel more than ready down there.”

he laughs in response. “fair enough.”

he takes his cock in his hands and runs it through your dripping folds several times, coating him in your juices and making you mewl at the feeling. he aligns himself with your entrance.

“ready?” he asks.

“mhm,” you hum in affirmation. “ready?”

“absolutely,” he growls into your ear as he pushes into you, hissing when he bottoms out.

not shockingly, minho feels huge inside you, stretching your walls with a pleasurable sting. it takes you a second to get adjusted to just how full you feel. once you get acclimated, you give him the go ahead. “min, please move.”

he begins to pump in and out of you, hips rolling against yours in a deliciously sensual way. the crude sound of skin slapping against skin begins to fill the room along with the music still playing in the background.

“fuck, baby, you feel so good,” minho moans as he presses his lips to your jaw. your pussy clenches around him when you hear the new nickname. “you like that? like when i call you baby?”

“yes,” you gasp out as your nails dig into his back.

your hips begin to roll against his as he pushes in and out of you. he snakes a hand in between your writhing bodies and starts to toy with your clit. it doesn't take much longer before you feel the familiar knot growing inside you.

“min, just like that,” you say, breathing growing ragged as you start to chase your high.

he continues his work in earnest, doing his best to get you there. “cum, baby.”

your orgasm comes washing over you. your legs shake as your nails scrape down his back, his name escaping your lips like a mantra. your walls flutter around him as he languidly pumps into you, wringing you of every last ounce of pleasure in your body.

“that's it, baby,” he presses a kiss to your temple. your pussy continues to slowly clench around him, and he feels his own release quickly approach. “shit. i’m not gonna last much longer with the way you're squeezing my cock like that.”

you moan, and his movements pick up a faster pace as he feels his own high growing near.

“where?” he asks, hips snapping into yours.

it’s such a short question but you know exactly what he means. “inside. please. i'm on birth control, it's fine.”

his hips stutter and his body shakes while he groans in pleasure as he empties himself into you, warm cum filling you up. he throws his head into the crook of your neck in exhaustion as he moans your name. after a few minutes, he gathers his composure and looks at you, peppering soft kisses all over your face.

“damn, maybe i should have had you teach me bachata sooner,” he says, making you both laugh. “let's get cleaned up really fast.”

he slowly pulls out of you so he can go grab some tissues to clean you and himself up. he puts his sweats and shirt back on, and you slide your panties back on. he tosses you his hoodie to wear, and you take in the smell of his cologne as you pull it over your head. you move so you’re sitting on the ground with your back leaning against the wall. he grabs a couple of water bottles and hands you one to drink, joining you on the ground. you each take a sip before sitting there in nervous silence for a few minutes. your'e best friends that just fucked, so you're both trying to figure out what to do.

“sooooo…” you begin. “what does this mean?”

he takes a second to answer, trying to find the right thing to say. “i guess this means i should finally take you on a proper date.”

you look at him with a big smile and you tackle him to the ground in an excited hug before giving him a soft kiss on the lips.

“so is that a yes?” he says with a smirk.

“yes!” you respond, completely overjoyed.

another sob clogs your throat and his hand moves to start softly stroking your hair while he tightens his embrace further. "it's okay, just breathe. just focus on your breathing. i've got you now." 

he continues long after your sobs die down and your tears dry up, just holding you silently, letting his presence comfort you. finally, you pull away. his eyes scan your face quickly, giving you a once over to check that you are actually okay. 

"thank you," you whisper, offering a small, shy smile. 

"always," he says simply and the gentle smile on his face warms your heart even further. "do you wanna talk about it?" 

with anyone else you would immediately say no, you hate opening up about yourself. but this is chris. your best friend. the person who has been there for everything for the last seven years. so, instead you simply nod in response. 

"it's my mom." 

he gives you a knowing look before settling back against the wall next to you, his arm pressed against yours. his warmth melts into you and you lean your head against his shoulder as you start talking, telling him about everything that occurred between you and your mom leading up to your panic attack.

as you recount the events of the last week tears spring to your eyes and roll silently down your cheeks. you can feel yourself relive everything as you tell the story, but somehow you manage to remain calm the entire time, your best friend's presence stabilizing you in a way that nothing else ever could. you don't ever feel yourself slip back into the previous state of panic. not when you talk about the manipulation, or the lying, or the blatant gas-lighting, or even when you explain the phone call from your mom that triggered the panic attack in the first place. 

chris listens patiently the whole time, silently offering you the comfort and support he knows you need. when you finish your story the room goes silent for a moment before you hear him mumble a curse under his breath.

"i'm so sorry," he says, turning his head to look at you, "i'm sorry you're still dealing with all this shit from your mom. you don't deserve any of this. if there's anything i can do, literally anything, just say the word and i've got it."

your heart warms with how selfless and genuinely caring he always is and your lips tip up in a small smile. "thank you. really. thank you so much, i don't know what i would do without you." 

"the feeling's mutual." he smiles back at you before standing up and offering you his hand to pull you up off the floor. "okay, now, how about you rinse off in the shower and then we can eat some pizza and watch a movie. i got your favorite."

"that sound's perfect. but....do you think.... maybe," you pick at the skin around your nails nervously, staring at the ground between your feet. your words die off in your mouth and you shake your head, abandoning your request before you even make it. "nevermind."

"what is it?"

"it's nothing, just nevermind." you continue picking at your nails until chris' warm hand envelopes both of yours, gently stopping you. 

"what is it?" 

"it's just.... could you maybe.... yould you stay? like obviously not in here, but would you mind sitting just outside? and i'll leave the door open? that way i can still talk to and hear you?" you feel a blush rising up your cheeks from your embarrassment. aaying it out loud makes you feel even more stupid then when you just thought it in your head. he probably thinks it's pathetic that you can't even take a shower by yourself. 

"of course," he says immediately, "there's nothing i'd rather do." you sneak a glance at him, unsure if he is being genuine or just nice and find a soft smile on his face. he squeezes your hands gently. "really, i mean it." 

how does he do that? it's like he always knows exactly what you're thinking. 

he moves to the hall, sitting up against the wall right next to the door while you undress and get in the shower. he tells you all about his day while you scrub away the tears and sweat and snot from your breakdown. you don't respond to most of what he says, but he keeps on talking. he knows that what you need most in these situations is just to feel his presence, to know that he's there. so, you simply listen and let the comforting sounds of his familiar voice soothe you. 

you turn off the shower, dry off, and get dressed while he continues to talk about random nonsense and you lose yourself in thoughts of him. you don't know how you survived without him. he's the most genuine person you know and so caring and selfless. he always knows exactly what you need, sometimes even before you know yourself. and he's so funny, you don't think anyone has ever made you laugh quite as much as he can. and he's just the greatest person you have ever met.

god, i'm so in love with you. 

his words die off mid-sentence and you immediately realize what you accidentally just did. 

"shit. i said that out loud didn't i? i didn't mean to say that. shit, i'm so sorry, ummmm... just... just pretend you never heard that." you lean against the bathroom wall, burying your head in your hands as embarrassment and fear take over. a million thoughts start to race through your head as silence fills the air around you.

you never meant to say that out loud to him. yes, you've been in love with him for a while now, but you were never going to admit it. that would ruin your friendship. and chris' friendship means the world to you. today is just one of the many examples of why you don't think you could survive without him. but then you had to accidentally blurt out the one thing that could change all that. "chris, i'm so so sorry. i didn't mean to say that out loud, i just-" 

"you didn't mean to say it out loud, or you didn't mean to say it?" he cuts you off mid-sentence with an unexpected question that catches you completely off guard. 

"what?" 

"you didn't mean to say it out loud, or you didn't mean to say it?" he repeats himself, his voice much closer now. a moment later you feel him pulling your hands from face. the look in his eyes is intense in a way you've never seen before, as though your answer to his question is the most important thing he will ever hear. "which is it?" 

"well, i-" you cut yourself off, unsure of whether to take the safe route and lie or bare the truth while risking jeopardizing your friendship. your decision doesn't end up really mattering because chris continues before you can make up your mind. 

"because if you didn't mean to say it, i totally understand. it's been a long day full of a lot of emotions. all you have to do is say the word and we can just pretend it never happened."

even though you never meant to ever say those words aloud to him, the thought of taking them back now makes your heart ache. 

"but if you did mean them.... if you really, truly meant them," he pauses for a moment and you watch his throat roll as he swallows. you can feel a slight tremor in the hands holding your face and you don't think you've ever seen chris so nervous. you reach up and place your hand over his, squeezing gently. you do it not only to reassure him, but also to give yourself some confidence for what you say next. 

"i did."

the two words come out so quietly you're not sure if he'll even catch them. but when you hear him release a breath, you know he did. his hands slip down from your face to grip your waist, pulling you ever so slightly closer to him. 

"you have no idea how much it means to me to hear you say that. because......i'm in love with you too. god, i've been in love with you for years. every time i ever made you laugh and i knew that broad, beautiful smile of yours was all for me, i fell harder. and every time i got to hold you in my arms while you cried and opened up about your darkest moments, i felt like the luckiest guy on earth." 

your heart is racing and your mind is spinning from the confession that just poured from him. for a moment you don't respond. you just blink. you take a breath. you take a second to soak in the fact that this is really happening and not just a dream. 

"i.... i don't know what to say.....i just can't believe that you've felt the same way all these years. i was so afraid to say anything because i was scared it would ruin our friendship." 

you watch as he tips his head back against the wall and lets out a pained laugh. "god, that's the exact reason i never said anything! i have been madly in love with you for so long, but the last seven years of friendship with you have been the best years of my life and i refused to give that up."

he pulls you even closer before reaching up and gently grasping your face again, one thumb softly brushing against your cheekbone. he leans in ever so slightly and you feel your heart jump into your throat. "i'm going to kiss you now because if i don't get to kiss you in the next five seconds after all these years of waiting i think i might die. so, if you don't want me to you better say something now or else--" 

"just kiss me chris"

the words have barely left your mouth before he closes the small space between you and presses his lips to yours. 

your mouths intertwine and you marvel at how soft his lips feel moving against yours. the kiss is new and exciting, something you've been waiting for. but it also feels familiar, as if you were always meant to be kissing him. 

after a few moments he gently pulls away and kisses your forehead before resting his own against it. a comfortable silence envelopes you both as you soak in what just happened. 

"did we really just have our first kiss in a bathroom?" you wonder aloud. chris chuckles softly in response and you feel his chest rumble against yours as he pulls you even closer. he wraps his arms tightly around your waist as he dips his head to whisper softly in your ear.