honestly cain and abel aren’t even special like that’s just what having a brother is like

Yeah, but they didn’t know that yet because brothers had only just been invented.

choosing to believe every single story robert pattinson tells about himself in interviews no matter what he says to contradict himself. the only time hes lying is when he says he's lying

two robert pattinsons stand before you. one always lies and the other always tells the truth. theyre not guarding a door or anything though they're just hanging out

Italy got both the gay Euro and the straight Euro this year huh

don’t go to art school. pirate some drawing programs. buy a cheap tablet off of craigslist. take furry porn commissions. draw some wolf cocks. start a patreon. make ten thousand dollars a month. retire at the age of 25. buy an island with your dog dick money. invest in indie games. buy stock in mojang. fly to sweden and hang out with notch. become notch’s friend. have him buy you things because he’s desperate to have friends and doesn’t want to lose you. open notch’s mind. shape him in to a good person. get married to notch. give notch the spark to create a new game. become the artist for notch’s new game. it’s a furry hentai game. start a kickstarter and make another ten thousand dollars. run off with the money. buy another island. draw more dog dicks. get out there. live. 

it would've been cooler if those animals they sent into space came back with superpowers

This is an attack

last time i had sleep paralysis that kid Wen from lemonade mouth stood at the end of my bed and did the rap to Determinate for like 3 hours straight and i haven’t slept peacefully since

It wasn’t sleep paralysis he was actually there he actually broke into your house and intended to rob you but you woke up and he had to improvise