Hey there, sugarcube

are you looking for help with creative writing? want someone to go over your fic before you hit publish? i just so happen to be trying to fill out an editing portfolio!

i love writing and also went to an arts high school and studied english in college, with a focus on creative writing. aside from the credentials, i do also just enjoy reading people’s works and helping them fill out plot holes, rounding out their characters, work through writer’s block, etc and I’m very good at it, if i may say so myself. i’ve worked on a handful of more “professional” projects aka publishing and production as well.

if you’re interested in my help and input, feel free to message me here on tumblr and i’ll give you my email and we’ll get started! it can be anything from original stories to fics. if it is a fic you’re asking for help on, if it’s not one of the fandoms you’ve seen me reblog, i’ll just ask for you to also give me a run down of what’s important to know in order to fully connect with the fic (gotta know the source material before you break it!)

“Tikki, spots on!”

Ask to be put on the Do Not Call list. If you think it’s necessary, ask to watch them get out the territory card and write it down, but realistically, Witnesses in my experience are pretty good about this and the only time it won’t be honored is if someone forgets to check your address or if it’s been like 10+ years

Tell them you are an apostate. They are not allowed to speak to apostates at all, ever, but especially in regards to their beliefs. They aren’t supposed to go to places/events where they know apostates will be

Argue with them. Jehovah’s Witnesses are instructed to end the conversation and leave if it becomes clear that someone wants to debate rather than just passively learn and accept that they were wrong before. This might get you put on the DNC list without even asking

DO NOT answer the door naked. You wouldn’t think this needs said, but intentionally flashing people is sexual harassment, and Jehovah’s Witnesses frequently preach with children— both as a training thing and because people are more likely to be receptive. They say every JW who’s preached long-term has gotten a naked householder at least once. Do not do this

DO NOT unleash your dogs in the yard. First off, your dogs aren’t as mean as you think they are lol. Second off, almost every JW has been dealing with giant jumpy dogs— again— since they were children. Letting loose your dogs will get their dress clothes muddy, possibly tear them, and maybe scare some children/a few adults who will simply pass the door to someone else. It will also make every other dog in the neighborhood start barking. This isn’t helping you or anyone else

Remember that you are dealing with a high-control cult. Jehovah’s Witnesses have falsely prophesied the end of the world almost a dozen times. Around 33,000+ members have died for the sake of a doctrine they made up in the 60s. Whoever you are talking to has trained for years or possibly their entire lives on exactly how to sell this, and make literally anything sound reasonable and appealing. Jehovah’s Witnesses believe that God will kill all non-JWs at Armageddon, as they deserve, and are actively praying for this. They won’t tell you that on the first visit, or the second, or the third. Don’t let them get their foot in the door. Don’t talk to them more than once

spoon your gf and then crush her (with love)