mae

I always felt I couldn't possibly be upset about dying to an alien monster because proof of otherwordly life is exactly what it'd take for me to die happy

In the novelizations of the original two Resident Evil games, which came out before the series left Raccoon City or Umbrella corp, the author's own justification for all this was that the puzzles were commissioned by the same paranoid rich CEO who gave bored company engineers and scientists limitless budget and creative control to protect his evil secrets as obtusely as possible. So basically a delusional billionaire gathered a bunch of amoral computer nerds and told them "while you're farming artisinal lizard demons for the army, I need you to make it as confusing and difficult as you possibly can for anyone to get in and out of my office alive" and I guess their autism lit up like a blazing star with a free ticket to design a real world lucasarts adventure game. This is implied later in the book to be exactly the reason why none of them made it out alive.

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse danny devito and he would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

Your brother is the best

Who the fuck changed this from vampires to Danny devito

the real question is why I was completely ready to accept that this person had a debilitating childhood fear of Danny Devito

World Heritage Post

The depths of my coveting for the Haunted Beauty governess Barbie are too great to explain with human language.

I STILL covet that governess Barbie. I also want her outfit in my size.

:3 feels happier than :) But not as genuine as :]

:3!!!

You understand the treasures!

i know folks are gonna call me a pedo for this one, but i grew up seeing my mom and grandma naked. they had health issues and at times needed care and help showering. and i truly think more kids need to be shown the nonsexual reality of naked women at a young age. there is nothing sexual about my grandmothers breasts, they were simply body parts. more women die of heart attacks because people are too afraid of breasts to do real chest compressions, because they are scared to touch their breasts. the sexualization of our bodies literally kills us. i need people to be more normal about naked bodies and i'm 100% serious.

I grew up around naked old people who weren't even my family! Gasp! And it was a good thing. I grew up around old-school hippies at a place called Lothlorien (in Indiana) and one of my friends dads held a sauna day every Sunday in the middle of the woods (like you cannot drive to their house, you park about a quarter mile away and walk into the woods kind of woods). All day random old people came to get naked, high (pot), and sweaty. Just random old peen and boobs swaying with the leaves. No big deal. These are things that I believe made me more at home in my body, made me more excited about aging, made me more willing to fight for my security and safety.

Bodies are just bodies. Nothing sacred and nothing inherently shameful or sinful either. The fact that we still can't get that through everyone in however many years it's been is just fucking idiotic.

Friendly reminder that Purity Culture harms everyone and the overt sexualisation of people's bodies happens because they are viewed as objects and property and not as human beings!

mom just said “[place] would be a good place for a honeymoon. or a platonic relationship celebration if that’s more your thing” and i think ive trained her well