Sugar Rush

It’s been a while Tumblebog! Well, well. Just felt like writing now that my inner peace has been destroyed for over a week now. I’m not gonna lie. I am in a very emotional state right now. Although I am able to control the urge to cry and breakdown which makes a lot of difference than how I used to handle moments like this. Can you imagine, I’ve been on the same wavelength 2 or 3 years ago. I can’t seem to fathom why I always end up being the one who always wonders. So because of this whirlwind of emotions and overthinking, I thought of giving myself some “me time”today and just go where my feet takes me not knowing it’s going to cost me. Haha. But it’s all good. Had a lot of really interesting stuff explored today.

So I woke up early than I usually do on a weekend. Was supposed to join my parents at Divisoria but kinda wanted to go elsewhere so there. (Good thing though because they ended up going home anyway because the roads where closed. Hehe) Anyway going back, I got hold of that go getter feels again so I planned to go to Makati today to buy stuff from the Global Pinoy Bazaar. But as I was browsing through my Instagram this morning, saw an artsy store who was giving away freebies for there first 100 customers this weekend. Being a fan of freebies and all sorts of art stuff, plans changed and I was headed to Rockwell first instead. Now here’s the start of my unusual day but amazingly an interesting one.

1) My UBER ride. Since I have a 100 peso uber credit, I opt to use it in order to get the fastest way to Powerplant Mall to reach the 100 customer quota. (haha! A for effort. Also did this in Kapitolyo wherein I forced myself to wake up at 6am and pretend to go to work just so I can make it in time for another Art store’s opening. With freebies of course. :p) So there I thought the ride was going to be a typical uber ride. Music background. My eyes on my phone or on the road. But interestingly, this uber driver was such a talker. Haha! In a good way though. We talked about a lot of things and he gave a lot of trivias from the same school we attended to in college, to Martial Law and the places we passed through. Really didn’t notice the traffic because of how our conversation turned out. We were disrupted though when another passenger booked him for uber pooling which is my number 2 interesting experience of the day.

2) UBER pooling. It was my first time to try the app with this option. Since I wasn’t really picky today, I thought of sharing the ride if ever. So in the middle of Mr. Driver and my conversation about Martial law, this passenger booked him. It was actually out of the way but there was no way he can cancel the booking so we headed for Passenger #2. When we finally picked her up (yes she is a she), he started interviewing her the same he did to me. The ride was full of stories and I found it better to listen to them since I wasn’t really in a mood for long talks haha. Don’t get me wrong, the convos were funny because Mr. Driver himself was all out being his crazy self. Even talked to him in japanese! Haha basic ones though :p

3) My arrival at Powerplant Mall. It actually took us 1 hour because of the uber pooling and everything but really didn’t mind. Before I alighted, Mr. Driver told me that he thinks there is something so deeply interesting about me. I wasn’t really creeped out because I thought, maybe this was God telling me there is more to me than what I think of myself. (which explains the whirlwind of emotions). it was both nice and comforting to hear those words from a stranger.

4) Common Room. I don’t really go to Powerplant Mall often so I’m not familiar where the stores are. So I did have quite a long time figuring it out. (I didn’t ask the guards hehe) After about 20mins or so, finally ask someone and headed to my destination. 2 meters away from the store and my heart was jumping for joy. This place was heaven <3 Took me a while to choose what I want to buy because of the many beautiful stuff displayed there. Some I think I could create on my own (oh if only the motivation to do it won’t fade) and some I wanted to try. Bought some stuff that I think might be a little therapeutic for my broken soul (LOL) and so spent some here and there. Was actually more anxious about the freebie which I was searching for while I was at the counter haha! Turns out it wasn’t the usual loot bag that I got previously. I was asked to pick up one from a bowl of papers and that would signify my freebie. I got a digitally printed painting of a world map. Not bad really. I displayed it infront of my desk :)

5) Global Pinoy Bazaar. After my hoard at Common Room, I headed to Glorietta for the Bazaar which was after all, my original plan. Haha. Actually found a lot of interesting stuff and I was really trying to control my urge to buy but ended up buying more than what I planned for. haha. Bought a pencil case, pair of shoes, new pair of glasses and had a little detour to Bench and bought some undergarments. Whew! There were really a lot of good stuff there and the best things was, everything was Filipino made and a Filipino owned business. So yehey for supporting our own! (Common Room goodies were also Filipino made by various Pinoy artists)

This entry is getting kinda long already so I am stopping at number 5. I actually went home after my last purchase since I wanted to be home while the sun was still up and just so I wouldn’t spend anymore haha. Shopping therapy - check!

Arrived home with my family playing mahjong. Was really not in the mood to join but I still did for a few games. Now here I am, in front of my computer, trying to juggle thoughts of cleaning my stuff, pack for a work trip this coming week, do some delayed errands, go through my hoard purchases and finally overthink about life. And before the latter got the best of me, I decided to visit Tumblr and here I am writing this long crazy entry! Still not a 100% okay about what I wanna do but I’ll get there. Somehow, somewhere, some time soon hopefully.

I know its better to count your blessings and the good things that happened. I have always been a believer that everything happens for a reason and it pays to look at the bright side of things. But sometimes, there are really those moments that you will feel you're off the grid. I guess it is inevitable in some way.

And so, i thought of just letting all this piled up thoughts in my mind steam out. I hadn't actually felt it until today, an hour and a half before my birthday, when i am supposed to feel atleast a bit happy. Don't get me wrong, i am happy. Like 60% happy. While the remaining 40% is getting in me tonight.

First of, 2 weeks ago when i was having the time of my life at Cebu, my iphone got wet. We all know that when an iphone gets wet, it's either gonna break you or make you haha. And it did break me. My 3 month old iphone gone just like that. Okay fine, it's just a gadget. But.. But. You know how much the gadget costs right? And so me, trying to move on from this heartbreak is thinking of ways to look at it on the bright side. I tried getting comfort from my family, asking them what i should do. I appreciate how my sisters were helping me try to recover files, pictures (huhu) and contacts which i failed to back up (another huhu). And then here goes my dad, saying that it was "karma" for me. I tried to think of it as a joke or just an initial reaction but he again said it and even backed it up with "isipin mo bakit ka nakarma". I couldn't help but walk out because tears began to shed. In my vulnerable moment all i wanted was a little bit of words of comfort. I wasn't even asking for money or what not. And there he was trying to make me feel worst. I thought of where those came from and i think that was it. It just hurts.

There are still a lot of things that happened. In other aspects and circumstances. Though they are just small things, i'm kinda having a hard time now not stressing over it.