Obsession

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Journal, Odd...I never thought I would write one of these of my own volition. Well..time has gone on quietly, yet quickly. The cafe has grown, I could easily staff each shift and only supervise, but of course I love working behind the counter far too much to take that stance for it. Obsession is mine, and I will make sure it runs smoothly and successfully. As for dancing..I've been looking into other styles than just modern, and I've been enjoying every moment. The instructors always praise me in each class, saying I'm a quick learner and that I have natural skills. I hope that it is true, and I will keep working..maybe I will be able to share my skills some day, but that day is not here. I've been thinking of my old career, but I can not find a reason to go back, so I will not worry myself with it. Though looking at my old shoots is always interesting, to see how much I have changed, and also..how much I could still be that..ah, but enough of old dreams. I've been trying to meet new people, make friends..goodness knows I need more company than just my employees and customers, and the instructors and other dancers. Sometimes I wonder if I can find someone who can take me away from it all again, that he can take me and make me forget when I am with him. My mind has been racing far too much lately...I do not know what to do with all of my thoughts, so I dance, and bake...and drink.  I think I'm going the opposite way that I want to, maybe someday I will find someone to take care of me again...because I seem to be losing myself. Kiseop

He frowned as he stared at the words on the page that seemed to be swimming now and a hand moved to his neck, a quiet gesture of his desperation, but the feeling of his skin, bare and smooth made him flinch and he slammed the book shut before stalking out of the room. He hated feeling the way he was, but what could he do but continue about life as though nothing were wrong?

That was what was going through his mind as he washed his face and then proceeded to dress up, a black button down and black pants that flattered his figure. He would have a good time that night, he was sure of it, or would do his best to make it so. He wasn't sure what would happen out there, but maybe he would find someone to make the evening more interesting.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down! You don't want to get even more hurt, do you?"

"Tell me where it hurts."

"Whoa, that's purple... It looks like your shoulder is dislocated."

"Oh my god. Are you okay?"

"You're bleeding... You're bleeding bad..."

"This is gonna hurt..."

"Holy crap! I may not know much about human anatomy, but legs don't bend that way!"

"It's all swollen up..."

"You have a black eye. Where you fighting with someone?"

"Okay... Okay, hospital. Hospital, now."

"I think you have a concussion."

"Calm down! Calm down! Your ankle is sprained, okay?"

"Here, lean on me."

"I'm gonna need more bandaids..."

"What the hell happened to you!?"

"Here, I need to clean you up. This might sting a bit..."

"We need to get the bullet out..."

"Oh my god, you've been shot!"

"Did... did you get beat up!?"

"Just hold on. You're gonna be fine..."

"Look out for that car!"

"Wake up! Oh god, please wake up!"

"You're alive! Oh, thank god!"

"I'm no doctor, but you should have that looked at. It's bleeding a lot..."

"What is that? Are there bandages under your shirt?"

"Why is your arm wrapped up like that? And are those blood stains!?"

"You must have hit the back of your head really hard."