When youāre a little girl in America you grow up being fed the idea that there is only one form of beauty, automatically the image of the tall, thin model with blonde hair and perfect breasts comes to mind. You grow up feeling insecure about your body because everywhere you look youāre being told in multiple forms of media that if you donāt resemble the standard of beauty that has been set you are undesirable, unlovable and basically dehumanized. As a young girl I was very active, I did gymnastics, ballet, and multiple sports but somehow I was always theĀ ābigger girlā. I was teased at school because I wasnāt the same size as theĀ āpopular girlsā and the younger version of me began hating my body even though I knew my body could do amazing things like carry me across a football field to score the winning touchdown, and come in second place in the 200 meter dash and help my gymnastics team win in a competition. Even knowing all of the amazing things my body was capable of I loathed every single inch of it because I wasnāt meeting the criteria of beauty I had seen every day on t.v and in magazines. When I became a teenager I hated my body so much that I began self mutilating, and while I never forced myself to be sick after eating I did skip multiple meals a day. I hated my body because it never changed, I was always theĀ āfat girlā and was never treated as equally as the girls in my school who were thin; It wasnāt until I was 15 did I find out why my body never changed. I found out that I had something called Poly-cystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS for short. Itās an endocrine disorder that affects your hormones, reproductive system and causes insulin resistance. It also causes weight gain and inability to lose weight by conventional means, at this time there is no cure for PCOS; only management of the disorder and even sometimes those options donāt yield results. I am now a 23 year old wife, married to a wonderful and loving husband who sees the beauty in me when even when I couldnāt. As a young girl I never thought I could find someone who loves me so unconditionally as he does and for that I thank him, but now that Iām more educated about why iām always going to be theĀ ābig girlā iām able to see how important body positivity is and how little it is talked about. When I was a child if someone would have told me that itās ok to celebrate my body as it was I think I would have struggled less with self hatred and instead strived to love myself more; instead of skipping meals and self harming I would have been out with my friends more and truly make an attempt to enjoy my teenage years. There is so much pressure put on women to adhere to a certain standard of beauty and if for some reason we donāt we begin blaming ourselves or hating our bodies and that isnāt healthy. Constantly being told youāre not valued as much as a thin person because youāreĀ āfat, plus size, curvy, overweightā is mentally and sometimes physically detrimental; it can lead to self harm, self hatred, eating disorders, and sometimes even suicide, yet no one seems to think itās a problem. People think that byĀ āfat shamingā they are motivating people to live a healthier lifestyle and strive to fit the mold of beauty that has become socially acceptable and all it ever does is cause more harm than good, Another thing that is never talked about is people who are shamed because they are too thin to have theĀ ācurves of a real womanā and that is just as important, I see very thin women hating their bodies because they donāt have the curves of a Kardashian or the bust of Pamela Anderson and that is just as detrimental to them asĀ āfat shamingā is to us bigger women. Self hatred is not limited to one single body type, women of all shapes and sizes can hate any aspect of their bodies and think that itās normal just because it has become acceptable to tell women what it is they should hate. I see beautiful women everywhere who feel the need to get plastic surgery to better fit into the mold of what is beautiful and itās a multi billion dollar industry. People make billions of dollars by selling you on the idea that you are not beautiful as you are and you can not be a sexy fierce woman without the help of some new type of surgery, weight loss supplement, work out plan, ect. They program your mind to hate who you are even though you are beautiful the way you are and we let people make money off our insecurities. Do i feel every woman should have the choice to undergo plastic surgery if that is honestly what she wants to do? you bet your sweet ass I do but, I donāt feel that any woman should be shamed or pressured by society, a spouse or lover or even family and friends to undergo plastic surgery to better adhere to the acceptable for of beauty. Body positivity in all forms should be a topic everyone talks about, itās not theĀ āfat personāsā way of spreading or promoting obesity or making people feel like itāsĀ āok to be fatā itās just a way of letting everyone regardless of shape, size, weight, and race to feel beautiful in our own bodies without feeling the need to defend ourselves. Everyone has a right to feel beautiful in the skin they are in without the fear of being judged by others, if a woman who is 300 pounds and she wants to rock a two piece bathing suite or a crop top and daisy dukes because it makes her feel beautiful who are you to say she is wrong? and if a tall thin woman wants to rock her small chest and be proud who are you to say she needs implants? Since when did it become ok to tell other people that they need to follow your beliefs and rules when it comes to what makes them feel like a bad ass? As a society we need to move forward with body positivity in all forms because life is hard enough without people making you feel as though you are less of a human because of the way you look.Ā
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