Look Alive, Sunshine!

why don’t you eat some hot soup from a carved wooden bowl and then maybe you’ll calm down

genius is never understood in its own time…

gonna go stand in a creek do you guys need anything

i wholeheartedly believe i deserve a sword. i am true. i am loyal. i despise treacherous men. what else do you need? knight me already

please hurry up and overthrow capitalism so that i don’t have to fill out any more job applications where i have to retype the contents of my resume into an application form after i already attached my resume

also today i was walking my dog and some old dude, in southern fashion, stopped to talk to me about her for a solid 5 minutes and at one point she started barking at something and i said sorry she’s so loud and he said to me “aw that’s alright. she’s a coonhound so she’s got lungs fit to blow the trumpets at rapture” and then chortled as though he hadn’t just spit the southern equivalent of shakespearean improv at me on the street

That’s some legit fairy tale level shit right there.