its so stimulating being your hat

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

“bend over” “bend what? over”

I hate this place

someone made a website where you can declare your favorite pokemon & why. let's all see if every pokemon is someone's favorite... Together

Two things: 1.) I'm actually crying. 2.) this is what it feels like getting hash browns at McDonald's

first rule of parasite infection is to have fun and be yourself

second rule is to start being something else

Me with my radroaches #myradroaches

Realizing the depression is not seasonal is like: Wow! What a beautiful flower! The birds are singing! I sure do love spring! I think I am fundamentally unlovable as a person.

Cooking horror game where you play as a cook working in the galley of a ship in the 1800s. There’s some kind of supernatural nautical horror story going on in the background but you barely notice this because you spend all day cooking in the galley.

As the game goes on you have to cook for fewer and fewer people but their orders--and the ingredients they bring you--become increasingly unhinged

fat pet cat is a kind of weighted blanket