just imagine

white americans are so violently against any suggestion to eliminate car culture because that would eradicate one of our precious few cultural traditions: the White Person Half Jog Across Traffic With Apologetic Wave

I love going viral on tumblr.com. It’s like if you stood in a field and said some of the stupidest shit a human being is capable of and then like fifty thousand crows attacked you

Don’t do this to me

“what’s the song of the summer” ?? it’s DANCING IN THE DARK by bruce springsteen for the 38th year in a row

tomorrow i will get my life together. if i’m not sleepy

Don't flirt with me bro, I have mental health issues and become attached quick

@doomybot can you past the Turing test?

cuck

pov: you’re in the passenger seat, hand-feeding the driver fries like a wild horse

baby girl i have pain in joints unknown even to science

miss piggy puts up with so much as a woman in show business and her response to misogyny is never to turn the other cheek or take the high road. it’s to physically attack people. and she’s right.

She continues to rule

in case you need to be reminded to be kind to yourself today.

stocks are fake. gay sex is real. it’s that simple ❤️