ABDL

I’ve seen a lot of posts lately of safewords. We all know safewords are important, right? But a lot of people forget that, especially in bondage, it can actually be quite impossible to say your safeword if something is restricting your speech, such as a gag.

So how do willing participants signal they are in distress during a scene when they are tied up and gagged?

The answer is quite simple, actually!

Safewords don’t actually have to be words - they can be hand signals, gestures, sounds, or whatever else you and your partner can find or come up with!

It‘s actually really vital and important to discuss alternatives to verbal safewords, as during different BDSM scenes there are many things that could restrict someone from being able to use just a verbal safeword.

Don’t get me wrong, verbal safewords are super important and probably the most popular way of being able to notify your partner that they are uncomfortable during scenes, however, there are many times where either speech is restricted during certain scenes, either by gear or instruction, or where speech is hard to understand or even say. Some submissives and masochists may, for instance, have gotten triggered by a certain scene or activity, and it may prevent said submissive to be able to speak coherently - when someone gets triggered (this is especially true for trauma survivors), it can make them mute and consequently, unable to speak.

In this case, it would be very vital for both partners to have agreed upon an alternative safeword in order to be able to notify the other that they need everything to stop immediately. 

So here are some alternative non-verbal safewords that could be used during bondage scenes or as a secondary safeword as a backup to your verbal safeword in the case that something may restrict both partners from being able to successfully and coherently state their verbal safeword!

Non-Verbal Safewords:

Hand gestures 

Waving your hand back and forth

Raising a specific number of fingers (such as 1 finger for slow down, and 2 fingers for stop)

‘Blinking’ Finger - putting your pointer finger up and down as if it is ‘blinking’

Clenching or squeezing an object (such as a squeak toy) 

Specific hand signals, as shown below

Sounds

These safewords are popular to use during times when your submissive is gagged or can’t speak, but can still make noises.

Whimpers - certain number of whimpers in a row can represent a safeword - *note* make sure that the number of whimpers is more than 2 in order to not be confused with natural sounds of pleasure or pain (i.e, 4 whimpers in a row = safeword)

‘Alarm’ - imitate the noise of that an alarm clock would make (i.e, beep, beep, beep)

Clapping - clap a certain number of times with your hands

Using Body Parts

A lot of these alternatives to safewords may be harder to catch onto if you are in a scene, so if you choose to use one of these as your safeword, both participants need to be more observant (particularly observant of the body part that is being used as the safeword)

Eyes - blink rapidly 5-10 times *note: make sure the Dominant of the scene is paying attention and looking at you first*

Toes - curl the toes 3 times consecutively

Head - move your head to the right (or left) side 3 times in a row

Nose - sniffle 4 times in a row 

Tongue - stick your tongue out 3 times consecutively

These are only a very few that I have been able to come up with. If you are creative enough, surely you could come up with hundreds more!

And finally, using objects to signify safewords is also a good choice, such as using a squeak toy or another object that makes noise when you put pressure on it. You can put the object in your submissives palm or even under there feet or toes so if they ever feel uncomfortable during the scene all they have to do is put pressure on the toy to make it squeak.

1. I ❤️diapers because they make me feel cute. 2. I ❤️diapers because it’s like always getting a hug around your waist. 3. I ❤️diapers because I’m too little to begin potty training. 4. I ❤️diapers because the potty is scary. (There’s a monster in there.) 5. I ❤️diapers because they make me feel safe. 6. I ❤️diapers because they make me waddle when I put more than one on a time and/or when my diaper is full. 7. I ❤️diapers for diaper changes. 8. I ❤️diapers for the smell of baby powder. 9. I ❤️diapers because they take me back in time where things weren’t as chaotic as they are now. 10. I ❤️diapers for stress release.

There’s a lot of expectations for Caregivers towards their littles, but they need looking after too! So here’s a few things I do for my Daddy, because I love him and he looks after me so well.

Make them something - Daddy is always spoiling me, but he is also impossible to buy for! So I love coloring things for him and looking up crafts to make him things to make him think of me and how much I love him.

Pamper them for a change - After a long day I like to give Daddy a massage, I enjoy rubbing all over his body with oils as much as he loves me doing it so it’s win win hehe. Sharing baths is one of favourite ways of spending time with Daddy and we both get to relax.

 Make them their favourite meal - I looove cooking/baking for daddy, it makes me sooo proud when I make something he really likes! If you can’t or don’t want to cook, even making them their favourite snack or sharing your sweets will make them smile. Be super duper careful in the kitchen though little ones, it’s a dangerous place to be so take your time and if you need help ask, they’ll appreciate the thought and some Caregivers might just like the idea of cooking with you!

Share your toys - Caregivers act all big and tough but everyone needs a giggle or a cuddle now and then so if yours has had a rough day then offer them your bad times stuffie! All my unicorns have magical anti-grump powers that work wonders on Daddy!

Tell them how amazing they are! - Caregivers need to hear they’re doing well from time to time, so let them know! Tell them how strong and brave they are, how much you appreciate their love and support. Caregivers have down days too and can doubt themselves, even get anxious and self concious just like us so make sure you help keep up their confidence with lots of little hugs, a ton of little love, smiles and support. I like to write daddy love notes and letters for him to find at work or around the house just to remind him how much he means to me.

Don’t ever forget how much your Caregiver does for you and how hard they work, sometimes just a smile and a cuddle is enough to make your Caregivers day!

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

2. Are relationships ever worth it?

3. Are you a virgin?

4. Are you in a relationship?

5. Are you in love?

6. Are you single this year?

7. Can you commit to one person?

8. Describe your crush

9. Describe your perfect mate

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?

11. Do you ever want to get married?

12. Do you forgive betrayal?

13. Do you get jealous easily?

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?

15. Do you have any piercings?

16. Do you have any tattoos?

17. Do you like kissing in public?

20. Do you shower every day?

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

28. Have you ever been cheated on?

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

41. Have you had sex so far this year?

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?

43. How long was your longest relationship?

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?

46. How many times did you have sex last year?

47. How old are you?

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

55. Share a relationship story.

56. State 8 facts about your body

57. Things you want to say to an ex

58. What are five ways to win your heart?

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?

64. What is your definition of cheating?

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

66. What is your favourite roleplay?

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

68. What is your sexual orientation?

69. What turns you off?

70. What turns you on?

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

82. Who is the last person you hugged?

83. Who was your first kiss with?

84. Why did your last relationship fail?

Are you sure about that, sweetheart?

Can you show me?

Is that too hard for you, darling?

Do you need help?

Are you excited?

Could you do one more for me, baby?

Are you going to sit nice?

Are you going to behave today?

Do you need to hold my hand?

Always doing naughty things without asking for permission.

I can’t post this on my Patreon due to my wand being used in this video so I thought why not try to post it here for all you kinky people of tumblr.😅

“This is the way I like my nappies - soaking wet, dirty and ready to be enjoyed. I have my own secret needs and desires that are hard to explain…”

Martin Coster

The Benefits Of Getting Spanked

Many people believe that if someone likes to get spanked, it is all sexual. That is not the case all the time. Even though getting spanked has some sexual effects or enhances sexual arousal, there are many non-sexual benefits from getting spanked. What can spankings do for you?

1. Getting spanked relieves stress.

2. Getting spanked is calming.

3. Getting spanked generates endorphins and puts you in a euphoric state.

4. Getting spanked generates adrenaline and gives an adrenaline rush, especially if you are anticipating getting a very harsh one.

5. Getting spanked lifts moods. Russian psychiatrists have found success in treating depression with bare butt whippings.

6. The marks left from getting spanked is like an art of its own.

7. For some, it can restore feelings of youth.

Don’t be ashamed of getting spanked, enjoy it! For those who never tried it in your adult years, give it a try. You never know, you may like it.