I am suddenly grieving all the lives that I have lived( and left)
I smelled my dad's deo in the bus and suddenly, I was under my blanket, huddled in snugly while he got ready for work.
I smelled oil on freshly washed hair on the woman beside me, and suddenly I was in my torn shorts and tee, knocking on Pri's door to be let in, so I could waddle about in her room and then curl up in her lap. I even smelled the exact fish curry we had had for three years straight in our hostel, and my ears started ringing with the pleasant cacophony that would surround us like a bubble whenever our "gang" got together in the dining space.
Stared at the streets for a little too long, and woah I was fourteen, on top of the Cellular Building, getting chills because of the turquoise magnificence in front of my eyes.
I began questioning, why now? Well perhaps because I have no idea what my âdreamâ life should look like, so there's no chance for me to grieve that for one , I thought wryly. But before the bitterness of self beratement could diffuse further ,I thought (or was it realised?), every good thing deserves grieving every once in a while. Every good thing deserves to be washed anew in tears every once in a while.