Ninja Fan

PROLOGUE: 

Word on the street as long as I've known them has been that the Norrisville's ninja's a grand and respected icon in the city.

The protector clad in black and red robes; running on rooftops and swinging around to fight monsters; all so you can get home safe at the end of the day. With his arsenal of ninja weapons, smoke bombs, and crimson scarf billowing in the wind, he makes it look so easy!

Or I try to make it look easy ever since I got the mask. Sure, the fighting is hard, and the staying alive part too— but do you know what part takes the most from a guy?

The people skills.

Bet you didn't know fighting bad guys had a lot in common with a retail job!

The same taxing amount of patience, stressful split second decisions, and dealing with happy and unhappy monsters— I mean customers; the similarities are uncanny! Funny thing is: it's my favorite part of the job.

Working with all these people and getting to know them makes the job all worth it. Even when the situation at hand is rough, I believe we can get through it together— if everyone in this crazy town actually agrees to work together. Though that difficult mission usually lies in my day job's jurisdiction— but more on that later.

Norrisville is home, but it sure does know how to keep you on your toes. The posters on the walls love to exclusively advertise the picture of a bustling little city nestled in the valley between beautiful mountain ranges and a dense forest, equipped with lots of local businesses for you to peruse. 

With my best salesman's voice, I'd shout,"If you like a drink, McFist's Brewery offers tours and tastings via appointment; or if you're a foodie, Dempsey's Diner or McClucks offers great service at a fair price! Looking for something activity wise? We have a concert hall in the northeast part of town, or the splendor of our beautiful main street! 

"Hell if you're looking for all three and more— there's always the Game Pit! A bar with a more limited food menu but has various kinds of entertainment! Including both the gambling sort of activities as well as not, and live music every night while you play, drink, and eat! We got lots of fun stuff!" Those lines are true, just not all our fair city has to offer.

Yeah, just like all the people in charge, I'd wave off the unseemly parts of life here.

Like the killer trees on the Northern Border; shady politicians that seem to be taking over the upper social scene; a wealthy and influential, yet rarely seen, family that practically runs half the town (with almost zero public records of how they got to that point, mind you) and a dense forest to the west and south that's dark, foggy, and apparently very haunted.

They try to sell those parts as part of our charm, yet hate to talk about the eight mystical gates on the Southern Range. Funnily enough, those gates are the harmless parts. Well, the least harmful anyways.

Of course, beings called yokai live through those gates. There's different kinds of them, but you know they're nice and normal when they're in their home realms. Only weird thing happens when they cross over to our town: they go berserk. They seem almost possessed, lost; and my friends and I help herd them back home so they can get back safely. We can't always save all of them… sometime's the Royal Guard or Antfee Security goons get there before us. They don't care about these guys as they truly are— just see them as an eyesore. In those cases…we at least bring their bodies back to their home realm. Give them a proper burial and all. 

They make the public fear the yokai from the eight gates, but if anything, I'd worry about the gate we can't see.

That ninth gate, the only one I don't know the location of, is the one that spawns these giant, feral rats that are…barely alive. 

They give me the major creeps— they don't bleed, don't communicate, not even to each other, and if we deal enough damage to them? They turn into a green mist that smells incredibly rank, and dissipates into the sky! They cause loads of property damage, and lots of civilian trauma, so we don't hold back on these guys. 

My best friend Howard coined the term "gutters" for them, and they're the most common issue we've dealt with these past years in the city. The Guards and Security never step in for these occurrences, and just love to blame us when things go wrong! Well, if they were reliable I guess The Viceroy Company would be out of work, wouldn't they?

If you're in the market of any of the following: any humane approaches involving yokai; gutter pest removal; technological fixes; or looking for help with any kind of community concern, that's where TVC shines! We may be a small company, but we are very thorough and efficient!

Oh, here's my card just in case you need anything. Even if it seems like a weird request, we're here to help!

[RANDY CUNNINGHAM]

[The Viceroy Company] 

[Secretary, Bookkeeper, Scribe]

[Certified Book Guy]