kelbyjade

“like two years ago”

“you mean i could’ve been drinking the tap water all this time?”

“yeah. they gave us individual mailboxes too finally, you don’t have to dig through the communal bin anymore”

“are you for real right now?? i just redirected my mail, i didnt know”

and the new tennant is like “why did you guys even live here if it was so bad”

“we like it.”

“i know, so sad. he was really gross”

“i mean, his cousin streaks through the commons sometimes and knocks on all the doors”

Old Resident: yeah we have no idea where that guy came from. We’ve left messages with maintenance ‘bout ‘im but-

“Oh! Thats from the crab infestation!”

“The crab infestation?! Wow, glad they got that under control before I moved in.”

“Oh, no no, it was an intentional infestation.”

“Uh….”

Knives are decorating the walls for the Ides Of March.

There’s a community movie night held on October 3rd where tenants choose to watch either Mean Girls or binge watch all of Fullmetal Alchemist.

Every single apartment opens their windows and blasts Earth, Wind, and Fire on the 21st of September