i've achieved my final form

Keskisarja was so right, Finnish students are living extravagantly

I need this man to write a poem or short story anthology about the woes of marriage as the divorce lawyer looking in. I think it would be FASCINATING. "it is the siren song that's gonna send you right into the rocks of my office" SIR. PLEASE. WRITE ME SOME MORE VERSES.

"time heals all wounds" WRONG. time is chasing me with a knife

"tiden läker alla sår" FEL. tiden jagar mig med en kniv

"aika parantaa kaikki haavat" VÄÄRIN. aika jahtaa mua puukon kanssa

i like how all cats regardless of species can either look rlly badass and cool or just incredibly silly stupid

Organised crime? Nah girl I'm into disorganised crime. If a goon doesn't have ADHD they aren't getting hired

Cops can't stop us if they don't know what we're doing, and they can't find out if we have no idea either

Minions stop this post from reaching 1k

On it, boss! Gettin' this post to 10k, just like you said!

pining is 100000% the most important aspect of pre-relationship fic for me. good-natured whole-hearted pining filled with lovelorn gazing and chest aching and fluttering touches, that’s my top priority. i was put on this earth to watch characters suffer over the profundity of their love for another person. unrequited love is why god made me. characters finding out that their feelings are reciprocated after long months/years of suffering is why the universe was assembled from nothingness. amen.

deeply unserious animal

That thing is straight-up a BUG

Why do you have this thing

very polite. 10/10

One incredibly good girl

this crab has better table manners than some of the people I served when I was a waitress at the pub.

Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!

Who wants to hear a DIY tiling pro tip that the experts won't tell you

Yes!

Do not drop your phone into the bucket of tile adhesive. This step is actually completely unnecessary and massively complicates the tiling process.

You say this but my uncle is a tiler and he swears by the “drop phone in putty bucket” technique. I think you’re just posting this for clout

Your uncle is caught up in a tradition that he was taught as an apprentice that he never questioned. Modern putty doesn't require phone, the formula has changed.

MY uncle says some customers still demand the phone putty technique because it "doesn't look right otherwise"

Drop an empty phone case in and those customers can't tell the fucking difference because there is no fucking difference.

My mum renovated houses for thirty years, she says “you’re half right, but in some cases - particularly in houses built before 1930 - the phone does add some benefit. Could be a tablet too if you’ve an old one in the garage. And anyone who says it’s got to be a particular model is just being precious about it, whatever the forums say.”

IPhones and tablets where invented in 1898, what did they do before then?

Nothing, tiles were invented in 1899.

my sister the historian studied ancient pompeiian tile mosiacs and there's definitely graffiti of dropping cans on strings into the buckets of putty, so it goes way back.