the amazing adventures of a stay-in

I just noticed my darling baby boy (cat) sitting in his little loft bed about 5 inches away from the most delightful sunbeam, so I scooted it into the sunlight for him and he looked me with the biggest widest expression. I don’t think he knew that was an option. I think I just blew his whole little mind

HOLY SHIT MY BOY

40,000 years ago, early humans painted hands on the wall of a cave. This morning, my baby cousin began finger painting. All of recorded history happened between these two paintings of human hands. The Nazca Lines and the Mona Lisa. The first TransAtlantic flight and the first voyage to the Moon. Humanity invented the wheel, the telescope, and the nuclear bomb. We eradicated wild poliovirus types 2 and 3. We discovered radio waves, dinosaurs, and the laws of thermodynamics. Freedom Riders crossed the South. Hippies burned their draft cards. Countless genocides, scientific advancements, migrations, and rebellions. More than a hundred billion humans lived and died between these two paintings—one on a sheet of paper, and one on the inside of a cave. At the dawn of time, ancient humans stretched out their hands. And this morning, a child reached back. 

you knock on my door and hear loud barking and scrambling noises and me yelling "no!! down boy!! down!!!" and then when i open the door there is a single crab on the floor

Sharks and stones may break my bones but worms will never hurt me

I Have Severely Underestimated the Potential Threat Posed By Worms

Stay safe, guys

This is important punks. Deadly important.

I’ve texted their hotline before. It was super helpful and even if it hadn’t been the amount of time you’re there can be enough to let your urges fade and stay safe.

The feminine urge to wear shark pajamas 24/7