i know we'll face each other again

"do it scared" this "do it tired" that. well no one ever talks about the fucking insurmountable "do it with greasy hair"

so i was talking to my grandmother about old-school video games and she was all “y'know there was one game i used to play, and it had like a maze, and it was underground, and there was a guy in first person and he had a weapon” so knowing her penchant for puzzle games, i started guessing like myst, or legend of grimrock so we start hunting through these 90’s-era games featuring dungeon crawls. turns out. it was not a puzzle game. it was nothing close to a puzzle game. apparently, in the mid-90s, my grandmother would sit down and play fucking Wolfenstein 3D and listen to AC/DC for like hours on end.

Au contraire, the puzzle was “how to kill Nazis” and the answer was “use gun”

"i asked chatgpt-" okay well i asked the frontman of the black parade and they said they didn't know so they asked their freaky baby puppet who offered nothing helpful in a funny voice

some royal jewels were stolen from the louvre which is unfortunate for historical reasons but you gotta appreciate a classic crime. so many crimes are online these days it’s nice to see heist culture is still alive

While you were studying the blade, I was studying you. You're weak on your left side and your footwork could use improvement. Also I think I've fallen in love with you. Who said that.

(gesturing towards your little sister) you know that thing would eat you if you died, right?