upside down

Have you tried this: [user attaches the first link to a Youtube video from her Google search…that she didn’t even watch first]? You might need to have your oven checked by the oven people. I don’t think it’ll explode, but you can never be too careful, right?

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Is this [...] a joke? Am I being tolled as the kids call it? Why would I bake jelly beans? Most brands aren’t even halal. But I did give my apartment building’s maintenance a call so hopefully they can make it stop before my niece gets home from school. 

[pm] I don’t know. It gets […] so confusing. I was locked in a basement most of my life and then I was in master’s clan. And now I’m here. Constantly told that I’m a monster, and then being told I’m not. Then told I am. My parents have been yelling nonstop. I mean, I let them because they have a right to be angry, but god, it’s so much. Sometimes it feels like I’ll always be nothing more than a monster or worthless. People see the fangs, and I’m just […] that.

Yeah, maybe you’re right. She deserves to feel comfortable wherever she goes, and like I said, I’d protect her with my life. I’m sorry you two have been through so much. Really. My heart goes out to both of you and if I can do anything to make it easier, I’d love to help. 

I’d like that too. Just tell me when and where.

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[pm] That is a lot to sort through, Metzli. I think it’s normal to be confused. For what it’s worth, I’ve been taught my whole life to believe vampires are monsters and I simply cannot believe that about you. I’m honestly not to certain what I believe anymore, you’ve given me much to think about, but I know you are good. Wait, your parents are here? 

I have no doubt that you would or that you’re capable. I appreciate that. Truly, I do. I think it’s somewhat more normalized to me, I’d been out in the world hunting before all of this happened. For Aylin, that was her first hunt. And [...] I don’t think I was happy before, not really. It was all just survival and I didn’t need more at the time. Now [...], well, I think having Aylin has put things into perspective. I don’t think I’d be much good at being alone anymore. 

Perhaps an early breakfast this week? Or... tea? Admittedly I am not versed in vampire eating habits. 

[pm] I know you do. You give me the biggest sense of security I think s possible for me right now. I wish things were simpler too. Like when I wrote in my journal when I was eight that I wanted to be you when I grew up. (Which is true, I wouldn’t ever lie to you).

I am glad. Your trying is super wonderful! I mean, in the best case scenario, my parents would be around with you, but you’re so super amazing, so I’m about as pleased with this situation as one could be. I don’t like any situation where you aren’t an important part of my life.

It was a bit limited, but yes. That makes sense. They are perhaps an exception to a rule, if such a thing is possible? It’s nice but weird to make friends. Oh, yes! I’d love that! Maybe we can make some classic dishes? I made some treats for him before and he seemed to like it, so I don’t think he’s super picky.

Yes please!

Oh, it was good! It’s been busy and I am still waffling around on what to do for a major, but all my professors are really nice. :)

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[pm] Good, I want you to feel as safe as possible given the circumstances. You wanted to be me? I don’t think I was all that interesting of a person when you were 8, Aylin, but I am glad you thought so. Things were simpler then, but [...] I think I like myself better now. There is still a lot I am figuring out, but my life has purpose with you in it. Purpose that I can feel, purpose I chose. Not simply purpose of what we are. 

You’re always so kind. That would be the best case scenario and it’s okay to wish they were still here. I know missing them doesn’t mean you love me any less. And I must say you’re doing extraordinary despite it all. I know there’s still much to fear out there and it’s okay if fighting isn’t what you wish to do with your life, but you’ve remained so good at the heart of everything. I’ve [...] seen enough death in my life hunting to know many don’t handle it with nearly as much grace. 

I’m unsure I know what the rules even are anymore. What I do know is that they are a kind and caring. And that perhaps destiny isn’t all that simple. I do know they add value to my life by being in it and that they would do most anything to be there for either of us. I think that has to be enough for now. At least, it’s all I can really wrap my head around. Classic dishes would be perfect. Perhaps set up a meze. And dolmas. I’d love to meet any of your friends. 

What are some of the majors you’ve been [...] waffling on? It is good to hear you like your professors. That must make the classes enjoyable. 

[user turns on his own faucet to find cheese. user is both unsurprised and grumpy about this.] Maybe there’s a gym or something in another part of town with showers that work. Wouldn’t recommend trying to bathe in the lake.

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My water seems to be back to normal for now... though it may be time to invest in some more Britta filters. Pretty sure the cheese ruined my last one. Not that I’m any good at remembering to change them. 

What’s in the lake? 

[pm] I like to think of it as pre-punishment. No point in fighting it. Have always been destined to be a monster. Does that make sense? I mean, even now, I can hear my parents just constantly yelling at me.

I actually went pretty easy on you. And my arm had just gotten ripped off a few days before that. Surprised I was able to stand honestly.

She probably isn’t, but it doesn’t have to be hunting, like you said. I train people on occasion. Haven’t really done it since I lost the arm. Kind of miss it. And you said she is scared of going out at night? Maybe if everything gets figured out, her and I could take walks at night? 

You’re welcome. I’m really glad you had a good day. I have a present too, but I didn’t want to make you any more uncomfortable. 

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[pm] I’m not sure destiny is quite that straightforward. Just as who you used to be was part of your destiny, so is who you’ve become. [...] I’m not sure if monster is an accurate descriptor. I once thought it should be for vampires, but I don’t quite know anymore. But who you are, who you’ve chosen to be, is a good person. 

I had gone pretty easy on you as well. Well, until the end at least. I got a bit carried away. Even then, your fighting was impressive. 

Perhaps it would be good for both of you then. Yes, she doesn’t like going out at night. I get why it frightens her. Her first and only hunt was... well, it ended with her parents being killed in front of her. I couldn’t stop it from happening. Only just managed to get her out of there. [...] It’d be nice if she could get to a place where she’d be comfortable going for nighttime walks with you. I know all the random changes in time throughout town haven’t been doing much to instill confidence there. 

[...]

I would like to see you. Perhaps soon? 

There’s cheese in the faucets now? Jesus Christ.

Yes, there is cheese in the faucets. Also, doesn’t smell good. I’ve gotten a few cases of water to keep us and the plants alive, but I’d kill for a hot shower right about now. 

[pm] I know this. I trust you more than anyone, and you make me feel safer than anyone ever has. Other than my parents, but… 

Yes, they said they were different - or at least wanted to be. Which does offer me some comfort amidst this confusion. I am glad you think I am easy to care about, and that I’m good. I think you’re wonderful, you know that?

That is good! I am glad you are able to go visit a mutual friend, and another ranger. I understand that, I’ve met a couple people who I already feel very able to talk to, which is new and different but really nice. One of them’s named Orion, and he’s even letting me teach him Turkish!!

Thai?

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[pm] I promise I value that trust. I’m glad I can give a sense of security. You deserve that. I wish things were much simpler than they are. I understand what you mean. 

If I hadn’t seen it for myself, I’m not sure I would believe it truthfully. I’m glad that offers some comfort. I don’t think, I know you are. [...] I’m not certain If I was better it would be your mother here and not I appreciate that. I’m trying. 

I think it will be good. Help me wrap my mind about this a bit better. I’m not one to deny what’s in front of me, but you know the things we’ve learned about vampires our whole lives... given it was fairly limited as that was never meant to be our focus. I’m glad you’re making friends. Perhaps you could have this Orion over for dinner some night? 

Thai it is. Your usual? 

How was your first week of classes? 

[pm] Oh it’s okay. Kind of deserved if you ask me.

I understand and nothing will happen. I’m very good at protecting myself despite losing one arm. That story is different.

I appreciate you being so kind. Was scared you’d see me as less than a person. Don’t think I would be able to handle that. But as for Aylin, I could protect her and teach her things if she’s comfortable. I go on hunts myself and know my way around a fight. I’d protect her and get her out of trouble. Only if you two are comfortable of course.

Take all the time you need. Hope you had a good birthday and enjoyed the lunch.

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[pm] That I am not entirely sure of. 

Good. That you’re able to protect yourself. Not about the arm. Though I suppose after our spar I can attest that you are a skilled fighter. 

You should be I don’t understand how you’re not How you possess such Vampires aren’t supposed to be It is obvious you are much more complex than I ever thought a vampire could be. I’ve never [...] really had someone I could speak to as candidly as I do with you. Guess I never really had anything all that deep to think about before Aylin. I appreciate that, Metzli. I’m not sure she’s up for going out for hunts, but getting some confidence back in the fighting arena could help. I think I find I go too easy on her when we spar now.

Thank you, Metzli. I had a good day and I very much enjoyed my lunch.

What’s she studying? I love hearing about university experiences. So much has changed since the last time I was there. Oh, no apologies necessary. You should see how messy my house is. I’ve always said it’s a sign of a genius at work!

A cooking day would be wonderful. Oh, yes, it they do speak Turkish. So do I, actually. Languages are something of a passion.

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She is still narrowing down her options, but seems to be enjoying it so far. I think having to take a language class seemed a bit pointless to her. She’s fluent in English and Turkish. Her Arabic is also very strong. She seemed particularly excited for her Geology class this semester which I know is one field of study she was considering. Not sure the car indicates genius for me. More that I maybe stop for one too many teas on the way to work. What kind of work do you do? 

Sen Türkçe konuş? Bunu duymak ne kadar harika! What other languages do you know? 

[ The sweatshirt is wrapped up in a box along with this bracelet, and some of Ceyda’s favorite baked goods - homemade, by Aylin - on their kitchen counter. There’s also a card with a “coupon booklet” inside with various IOUs such as - Aylin making dinner, a hike for the two of them, some version of a ‘spa day’ for Ceyda, and more. The card reads: ]

Happy Birthday!! I adore you, and so I got you some aunt related items, which I hope’s alright! Thank you for being there for me, always. I’ve looked up to you for as long as I can remember and I’m so glad to have you here.

Take out tonight? I’ll pay. :) 

Love you forever and always!!

Love,

[pm] I am glad you are also confused - well, no - not glad like happy but glad like, I’m relieved I’m not in this alone. It is quite amazing and also really nice how they hardly know me but seem to care about me. I will also support you, but if you decide that they aren’t someone you want to be around, I’ll be around them less, because I guess I’d feel weird otherwise, if that’s okay?? Okay, I am glad you have a friend who has experience with this. Can we do take out later?

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[pm] Aylin, I will always do my best to make sure you’re never in anything alone. It’s okay to be confused by this. Metzli is very different from everything we’ve learned about vampires. I do know they care about you, genuinely so. I may be biased, but you’re pretty easy to care about. You’re a good kid, Aylin. 

I need to sort my thoughts out a bit. I am visiting with a mutual friend we share who is also a ranger I went on a hunt with a while back with in Canada. [...] I think I will want to be around them once I figure myself out a bit better. They’ve been a very good friend to me. Someone I can easily talk to and understands how important you are to me. 

We can absolutely do takeout. What are you in the mood for? 

I would love nothing less. You are so kind. I appreciate your support. I opened my new restaurant, Pura Vida. We have all kinds of options and I would hands down make something custom for you if need be. Niece? What’s her name if you don’t mind me asking.

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Perfect, just let me know portions and prices, so I can make an order. I know my niece will appreciate it with the semester starting back up. 

Pura Vida, the new Mexican restaurant, correct? I have a few friends from Mexico. Will have to bring them by some time. 

[pm] Yeah. I was in it about 30 years. Forced to follow whatever master wanted. It was that or be tortured until death. So I made another option, and escaped. Master came back for me and I killed him this past year actually. He was the type of vampire you were told about. He wanted all of his fledglings to be like him.

It’s okay, Ceyda. The slayers are two men named Clay and Emilio, and the ranger is a man named Kaden. I trust them. Stupid of me? Probably. But I can’t ask people to have faith in me if I don’t offer the same thing.

Must be weird for you though, huh? I mean, you were taught a certain way your whole life. I can’t imagine all of your ideals being tested. It’s a lot, and I’m sorry. As for Aylin, she highly respects you and holds your word to the highest regard. If you don’t want to be near me, she won’t either. Which obviously I’m okay with. Well, I’m not okay, but I understand. Kind of. It just hurts? But, I don’t want to hurt anyone or make anyone uncomfortable either. This just really sucks. You’re like […] my best friend and it felt nice to be normal. I’ve never gotten that.

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[pm] That is terrible, Metzli. I’m so sorry you had to endure that. I am glad you got to rid yourself of him and live your life as choose. 

I know Emilio and Kaden. I am actually going to visit Kaden. Sort out my thoughts a bit. It’s [...] nothing you’ve done. You are just very different from everything I’ve been told. Which is not a bad thing. It’s good you are not like that. It just shakes up my own perception of things. But I understand what you mean, if you’re asking for trust, you must be willing to give it. I just don’t want anything to happen to you.

It is, yes. I will figure it out though. I just need some time to sort through my own thoughts. I don’t think it is fair for you to be the one to help me with that. [...] I don’t not want to be near you forever. I’ll get a grasp on this, I think. I just don’t want to project the idea I have in my mind of vampires onto you. That’s not something you deserve when you’ve been nothing but kind to myself and Aylin. [...] I think once we both adjust to the idea, being around you could actually help her. She’s been so frightened of everything since her parents’ died, given it was gruesome. I don’t necessarily want to push her to hunt, but I want her to be able to protect herself without any doubts or freezing... and feel comfortable going out at night again. 

I’m sorry, Metzli. You’ve been my best friend, too. I’ve never felt comfortable talking about most things that I’ve been able to with you. I want to try. To figure myself out and let things go back to normal. 

Ah, what brought you to White Crest? I’ve been here quite some time now, but I remember being new! It’s certainly a different kind of place. And I’d much prefer it if you picked me up. I’m not a big fan of driving. Never quite got the hang of it. I sort of assumed cars would be a passing fad.

Oh, that would be lovely! My kitchen doesn’t get nearly enough use. I have a friend who’s Turkish (or at least its body is) and I’d love to be able to whip up something to impress the next time we’re lounging about. 

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My niece is attending the university, so coming along felt natural. Home was too dangerous Could not risk It is definitely different, that is for certain. I can pick you up then. Perhaps this weekend we can make our way out there? I apologize in advance that my car is a bit of a mess. 

A cooking day soon, then. I usually have Thursdays off, if you’d like to plan something. You do? Does your friend speak Turkish? I would love to meet them some time. 

[pm] I know, but I’ve never been one to follow the status quo. It’s why I fled my clan. If it helps any, I have hunter friends. Slayers and a ranger.

That’s kind of you. Guess this means you don’t want to hurt me, which is nice. I went ahead and told the truth to Aylin, and I won’t hang around her. Not without your permission.

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[pm] I suppose that is what I like about you. You fled your clan. [...] That is brave. Slayers and rangers? Metzli, that is dangerous. Are you certain you can trust them? Who are they? I may know them. 

I don’t want to hurt you. I should want to hurt you I should have realized I’ve lost my I appreciate you being truthful with her. Aylin is old enough to make her own decisions. Whatever she is comfortable with, I will always support her.