a blog of great social and political import

i cant wait to be a piece of shit w/ a bachelors degree

it’s really quite a life, get ready

personally relatable

Why do Americans put the month first. It just makes no sense.

oh

I find this very funny cause you say that but your independence day is not called July 4th, its called the 4th of July.

What I find funny is that our armies were about half the size of the British army and yet we were still able to crush your crumby asses, declare independence and pour your tea in the ocean.

sorry I haven’t replied to ur texts I’ve been overwhelmed by literally anything that’s ever happened or will happen

Are you a “hello darlings” gay or a “what’s up my dudes” gay

I’m not here for this “hey y'all” gay erasure

This is super real.

Completely accurate.

“a person i know and also like” why are you harassing me for my feelings, website

Dying rn

@butterynutjob

He stopped in front of the mirror and sighed. His penis was just a little too large to be fashionable, and his balls were just a little lopsided. Most days it didn’t bother him, but today he pushed at his genitals, trying to make them look more normal, like the men in magazines. It was hopeless. He dropped his junk in resigned frustration. There were worse things than having too large of a penis, he thought.

oh my god😂

longlifebrooke

[audio transcription: So I’m sure we’ve all seen the videos recently of these things *squeezes the honking chicken several times* little chickens. Um. Well, so I discovered recently that if you pull the head off and then pull the noisemaker out it’s the right size that you can stick it in the end of a trombone mouthpiece. And then *deep breath* *the loudest, most horrible blatting noises* Yeah.]

Has science gone too far

Hyperbole and a Half

this is happening to me at this very second.