aziraphale: you can't kill me! there will be paperwork!
the paperwork:

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aziraphale: you can't kill me! there will be paperwork!
the paperwork:

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Riddle me this. if the mafia boss man Brian Cameron was supposed to be a mirror for God, then that would mean Aziraphale was supposed to outsmart God at Her own game. but instead he once again followed Her rules, Her ultimatum, and got played
We should have gotten a BAMF scene where Aziraphale delivers the smackdown to God a la the Crossword scene, with Crowley looking on in awe, maybe even after Crowley decided to sacrifice himself. For the emotional drama and and impact.
Aziraphale FINALLY going NO. I REJECT GOD. I REJECT HER RULES. I REJECT HER PLANS. And then outsmarting Her to end Her once and for all and give everyone a happily ever after
Putting aside the ending, the episode as a whole was not very well written. Season 2 ended with a huge relationship changing moment, but there’s not a lot of meaningful acknowledgment of it. They pretty quickly fall back into their old dynamic, we get one scene when Aziraphale does the apology dance and says Crowley has to forgive him and that’s it. What they really needed was a long scene with just the two of them akin to the confession from s2. Their fight about Aziraphale leaving and going to heaven wasn’t just about a fundamental difference of beliefs, it was a romantic rejection. Crowley confessed, Aziraphale rejected him, the season ended on a cliffhanger and nothing was resolved. Therefore in season 3, the natural resolution to that would be Aziraphale having his confession moment. Except we don’t really get that. There’s the scene when Aziraphale tells Crowley he was the best angel which was sweet but short, and Crowley has little reaction, just stares at him sadly. Then Aziraphale asks God “Why give me Crowley? Why make me complete and then take it away?” but again, Crowley has no reaction to it. The only acknowledgement of the kiss itself is when Aziraphale does the finger to the lips thing. It’s very anticlimactic. At what point does Crowley realize his feelings are reciprocated? We don’t know. They never get that moment together and so the story feels unfinished, all because the writers didn’t prioritize resolving the conflict they set up between their two main characters.
petition to tag the fake aziracrow as #effable husbands
Spoilers and full S3 rant below!!!
Turns out I cannot stop disappointment posting, especially after getting some sleep and really being able to think on all the reasons why the ending fundamentally bothered me so much.
One of the biggest ones is the strange turn in the depiction of the GO god.
From all the mentions of them in the book, to the actual voice we get to hear in the show, I was SO sure and felt it was so canon that the natural direction the show was leaning towards was the concept that angels and demons did have free will.
That both sides, under the guise of being forced along by a divine plan, were in fact making all the wrong decisions of their own free will exactly like humans do.
The ending of the book and S1 reinforce this especially. Everyone is convinced Armageddon has to happen! They tell Adam over and over again that this is the way things are, its part of the plan, and as supernatural beings, they all have no choice but to follow it.
But Adam doesn't. He says nope that's wrong, and does things his way. Even Aziraphale and Crowley. They act against their orders for years, sneak their way out of their executions, and this seemingly omnipresent god doesn't do a thing themselves in response despite all this supposedly being their will.
Then season 2 rolls around and Gabriel goes missing. THEE supreme archangel. Only for it to turn out in the end that he chose to do his own thing, as did beelzebub. They both turned against their orders and "purposes", and once again, there are no consequences beyond those attempted to be imposed by their immediate peers/coworkers. The almighty couldn't seemed to have cared less.
Even when the "bet" in regards to Job is falsely won. There's no way that god didn't know, and yet victory was still claimed and rewards were given out accordingly. I'll die on the hill that that was more of a test of the angels, and what they'll let happen, than it was of Job himself. And Aziraphale and Crowley are the only reason they passed, because they used their free will to do the right thing.
The series was moving in the perfect direction for the message to be that everyone has free will. That the angels and the Metatron especially were an excellent parallel to humans who do hateful things in the name of religion and claim the moral high ground because they're just following the will of a higher power.
But instead we got the bookshop scene and the last 30 minutes and a god that's holding the world and our angel and demon at gunpoint, telling them this is the way it has to be, and being very nearly cruel in her comments about Aziraphale's love for Crowley and how this story has to come to an end.
They should have kept her a mostly passive force in the story, it ruins so much of the series charm. The S1 and 2 almighty would never.
Instead, they should have put the responsibility on the angels and demons to fix things. Show them all that they do have the choice to make things better. That they can follow the example of Gabriel and Beelzebub and Aziraphale and Crowley. That there were consequences for the archangels coldness, and demons that can love despite their damnation
Like what was the point of going out of their was in S2 to show us that Aziraphale and Crowley were NOT outliers in their independence???
But nope sorry, just erase it all, yep!

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Me, hoping until the last second that they'll magically remember their past live or something
mad again. crowley's whole point is that humanity doesn't deserve to suffer for the crimes committed by heaven and hell, so his solution is to create a new universe without angels or demons. sacrificing themselves for humanity, sure, I get it. but what about all the humans who were wiped out with the book of life? god gave them the option of returning all those humans, and instead his solution is to start all over a la the great flood, something crowley was staunchly opposed to. so not only is there no happy ending for crowley and aziraphale, but there's no happy ending for recently corporeal jesus, or mrs sandwich, mr arnold, nina and maggie, adam and the them, newt and anathema. it's job's kids all over again. they didn't want the new children the angels offered them, job and sitis wanted their children back. it's the same choice they gave adam. he wanted things to go back to normal with heaven and hell behaving themselves so he could play with his friends. how could crowley and aziraphale be happy sacrificing their existence knowing it condemns all of the humanity they know and love?
For a moment I thought they were going to spend eternity together in the cosmic bookshop writing the whole universe back in existence in the blank books...
Hey so remember how in Season 1 Adam decided that he wasn't Satan's son anymore and made it so that it was always that way but he and everyone at the air base still had their memory? And he became something not quite human but still mostly human? Why the fuck couldn't have that been their ending.
sorry but s2 aziraphale did not hold trembling fingers to his lips thinking do it again because he wanted to boop crowley on the lips with his fingies

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Alright I'm gonna say it: the ending is basically an elaborate version of the "this was all a dream" trope. I'm gonna pass out.
aw they're gonna kiss when they're finally alone in the bookshop- nvm
aw they're gonna kiss after they made their decision- nvm
aw they're gonna kiss before they disappear- no what is the hand thing- nvm
maybe they'll kiss as humans- and then they pointed at me and laughed WELL FUCK ME THEN
mike in s1: omg wheres will
mike in s2: omg is will okay
mike is s3: omg dont think about will
mike in s4: omg i miss will
mike in s5: yooo wtf is goin on lmaoooo
i’m so locked out on canon that sometimes i’ll see like a mileven reel on insta and i’ll be like omg mike and el?? rarepair??
I NEED more ppl to be talking about cash from heartbreak high bc my god it’s the only canonically ace character that ever made me feel represented as an asexual, he’s not some bland two dimensional plot device that’s there to teach allosexuals about asexuality and he’s also not a character that gets like five seconds of screen time he actually feels like a three dimensional person do u know how rare that is

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