queen of my heart

Kudelia never thought she’d ever see Mars as home ever again, not after years of living on Earth, after being disowned by her parents. She’d made her life on Earth. Worked until she bled for a better star system.

For Hope.

So, she feels out of place, 68 years old and still standing, still fighting, as she steps in front of Tekkadan’s headquarters.

“Kudelia-san!”

She turns and sees her. Atra surrounded by small children, smiling at her like she did all those years ago.

"Wanna know why you lost?" Kitsunezuka asks, smirking his way.

Sarutobi ignores her but she goes on.

"You pushed her into a corner and then took what was most important to her. More than her pride or her position as heiress. Togame is someone Inugami Tsubaki would die for. She's that important." Kitsunezuka stops and snorts. "Stupid Inugami doesn't think she's much without her precious Togame by her side. Togame  is both her weakness and her strength-"

Touka visits her, very much against Yomo's orders, but very much as her heart desires. Yoriko seems confused, if slightly betrayed, Touko can tell as she watches her from afar. She's seen Yoriko at her front door- her old front door. She knows Yoriko's been warned to stay away from the area, thanks to people pointing out Touko's disappearance after the attack on Anteiku.

Yoriko looks tired and Touka hates it, hates that it might be (is) her fault, that her precious person is like that.

Touka wants to scream. Why isn't anything fair? Why did Yoshimura have to be targeted, why was Anteiku destroyed, why did stupid Kaneki disappear?

Why couldn't ghouls and humans just be happy?

Why couldn't she just be happy?

Shoko was a star, as far as Akira was concerned. She was light and good, always brightening everyone's day with her utmost effort. Shoko was who made sure everyone woke up every day when they had nothing. Shoko was the one who pushed them all forward to have something, even if at the beginning it was just themselves.

"Look I appreciate it," Saki started, rubbing the back of her head, "really I do, but I'm not interested in being a third wheel, ok?" she said bluntly. Akira and Shoko blushed to the tips of their ears, quickly tripping over themselves trying to explain to Saki that that was not the case or their intent, though Saki knew that well enough already. She watched them, keeping her expression blank, though frankly she wanted to laugh at them a bit.

They really don’t need her around as an excuse to not sort out their- whatever it is they are to each other. If even Saki can see how much they love each other and how much they don't want to hurt the other then they should really do them all a favor and just tell each other how they feel, because Saki is not going to hold their hands when they chose to do so.

"Hell if I know," is what Yuyuka says when Mamura asks her when she fell in love with Suzume, too. "You just don't know with that stupid country bumpkin, you know," she said passing him her water bottle. "One day, you can't believe you're on speaking terms with her and the next that you realize that you don't ever want to see her down. That her smile is really bright, if not the brightest in the world, or that, frankly speaking, you can't imagine a world where you don't love her."

"She's doing it to me," Kuroe says with a frown. "What she hates the most, she's doing it to me. She doesn't take me seriously, she acts like I'm her cute junior who ought to look up to her with stars in my eyes even though we joined at the same time," she continues until Tokieda offers her a tangerine. She mumbles her thanks, feeling awkward about losing her composure and getting interrupted by a fruit- no matter how much she likes them.

"She's not doing it to look down on you," he tells her.

"That doesn't mean that's not what it feels like," Kuroe bites back. "She's older than me I know that, but at least here? In border? We're equals and I want to be treated as such," she says before taking a bite of the freshly peeled tangerine. "I want her to take me seriously," she whispers the last part and if Tokieda-sepai heard it he doesn't pry further.

Up until now only her captain managed to get the truth out of her, and now Tokieda-senpai has joined her.

"Give me that," Touka said, snatching the bottle from Kaneki's hand the moment she has seen it when she had entered her apartment. She took a sniff of it and blanched, feeling her stomach curl in disgust. She quickly made her way to the bathroom, ignoring as Kaneki called after her in a soft voice.

"It was a gift," Kaneki said, looking at the ceiling with tired, empty eyes. "Miss Itori gave it to me," she trailed off.

"You can't drink that," Touka reminded Kaneki, taking her jacket off and draping it over Kaneki's curled body on her couch.

"I'm sure it had blood in it," Kaneki said, closing her eyes. She's not sleeping again, Touka thought sadly, running her hand through Kaneki's white hair. What did they do to you.

"Still smelled disgusting," Touka continued, trying to keep a conversation going. She wasn't sleeping which meant she likely was not eating either, and although Touka had food for them both she needed to know if it was ok to leave her alone even if only for a while to make her way to Anteiku and at least get more coffee.

Kaneki remained quiet, eye closed and expression empty until her brow furrowed and her lips twitched, catching Touka's attention immediately.

"What's wrong?" she asked once, and again when Kaneki didn't answer.

"Tsukiyama came by," Kaneki admitted. "He said he was ready to be my sword whenever I needed," she stopped, opened her eyes, looking somewhere behind Touka, turning away from her immediately afterwards.

"Kaneki," Touka said, looking at Kaneki's back, "what else did that guy say." It wasn't a command, but a plea. Trust me stupid Kaneki, she thought, stopping herself from putting her hand on Kaneki's shoulder.

Kaneki turned back to her slightly. "He said he was ready to be 'brothers in arms'," she whispered with a small smile.

Touka had to stop herself from flinching in rage. It didn't matter how much she threatened the moron, he just wouldn't stop showing his face. After everything Kaneki had gone through, did that moron not hear himself speak? Or was he so stupid that he hadn't noticed the signs?

"Hey," Touka started softly, "I told you, if that guy comes over just recite a book in your head, anything to ignore him. If he tries touching you then rip his arm off. Or call me, I'll gladly do it for you," Touka said, smiling at Kaneki.

"Thank you," Kaneki said, chuckling a bit before yawning.

Touka grinned. "Go to sleep, I'll wake you up when I make a cup of coffee," she said patting Kaneki's shoulder.

"It has to be a crime even in the deepest pits of hell to be that pretty," Hakutaku muttered watching Hoozuki walk away, the way her hips swayed. "A crime I tell you," she repeated at Momotarou, though he kept to his work, ignoring his boss as she went on another rant about lady Hoozuki's beauty.

"I don't really get it," Rukia started, holding her hand up when Ichigo looked ready to snap at her. "I'm not going to lie to you, I don't understand as much as I'm sure I should, but whether I understand or not has nothing to do with it," she started once more, making her way to Ichigo's bed leaving his closet behind her, sitting next to them, close but not too close. "What matters is that you're comfortable and worry-free so you can go hollow hunting without a problem, so if you need to ask something of me, please do so. If I ever make a mistake I expect you to tell me so I can rectify it. We're in this together until I get my powers back," she reminded Ichigo, "so we're partners so to speak. Trust me, whenever you're ready to, with full confidence. Trust me."

Ichigo stared at her, lip curl in mock-distrust, if the softness reflected in those eyes were anything to go by.

"Stop looking at me like that, you fool, you know I meant what I said."

Ichigo grinned at that. "Thanks, Rukia."

Rukia smiled back. "I still can't believe you don't think Chappy is cute, and don't roll your eyes at me, all the women back in Soul Society love Chappy!"

"I don't really get it," Rukia started, holding her hand up when Ichigo looked ready to snap at her. "I'm not going to lie to you, I don't understand as much as I'm sure I should, but whether I understand or not has nothing to do with it," she started once more, making her way to Ichigo's bed leaving his closet behind her, sitting next to them, close but not too close. "What matters is that you're comfortable and worry-free so you can go hollow hunting without a problem, so if you need to ask something of me, please do so. If I ever make a mistake I expect you to tell me so I can rectify it. We're in this together until I get my powers back," she reminded Ichigo, "so we're partners so to speak. Trust me, whenever you're ready to, with full confidence. Trust me."

Ichigo stared at her, lip curl in mock-distrust, if the softness reflected in those eyes were anything to go by.

"Stop looking at me like that, you fool, you know I meant what I said."

Ichigo grinned at that. "Thanks, Rukia."

Rukia smiled back. "I still can't believe you don't think Chappy is cute, and don't roll your eyes at me, all the women back in Soul Society love Chappy!"

"Davis," Elena said, ignoring the awe struck looks the rest of her team gave her, her younger brother even blushing and stuttering at her in shock. "What? You asked," she continued, turning another page of the inventory book captain Asimov had given her.

"Yeah, but- out of everyone you chose Davis?" Alexander blurted out. "Not that there's anything wrong with you- that- picking her I mean!"

"Nice save there," she teased sarcastically, shutting the inventory book to tap Ivan's mouth closed, "and you, stop that. You look like a moron."

Ivan shook his head, slapping his cheeks for good measure, though the rest of the team looked at him strangely.

"Soooo pretty," Morgan said, running her hands over Nah's scales with fascination evident in her eyes. Nah rolled her eyes, Morgan had been saying that for almost an hour now. She brought up a wing and let it fall over Morgan, the weight shocking her and fully bringing her down to the ground.

"You know," she started, giving Morgan a look that hopefully her dragon form could make her exasperation obvious, "if your dad finds out we're using dragonstones so you can check what I look like up close, we're going to be in trouble."

Morgan lifted her wing over her head, in a very comical fashion that Nah had to snort. Morgan grinned. "What he doesn't know won't hurt him."

"You're parents are the ones who always check the inventory," Nah reminded her, lifting her wing over Morgan's head, though she tried reaching upwards for it regardless. "They're going to know," she huffed, setting her head down, wondering why she agreed to this in the first place.

"Lady Sansa," princess Shireen started, taking the embroidery from Sansa's hands and setting it down as she knelt in front of her, much to Sansa's protest. "If you wish to leave, please just say the word and someone will escort you."

"I- I am fine here where I am, your grace-"

"Where would you like to be, lady Sansa?" the small princess asked with a soft voice. Sansa looked into her blue eyes, much like her father but warmer.

Blue like the sky but as bright as the sun.

It was different, it wasn't a promise to be married off to a kind man, in a land away from the capital, it wasn't a promise of marrying an heir of a place her father may have once called home, it wasn't a promise of one day ruling over the lands that her blood had ruled over for centuries.

It was a simple question.

"Home," Sansa admitted quietly, "I'd like to be home." She hadn't thought about home in years. Always a prisoner, here and there across the land, part of her had given up all hope. Part of her still remembered her home.

Shireen smiled, lifted herself off the floor and raised her small hand at Sansa.

"Your Grace, please, escape while you can," Phila pleaded, taking Emmeryn's hands in her own. Everything was falling to pieces, the enemy had already made their way inside the castle. Phila had heard her men and women scream, both in pain and in an attempt to bring out the last of their strength, but it was starting to get too quiet outside.

Emmeryn shook her head with a small smile and Phila felt her heart clench. This was their queen and gods be damned if she was going to seek safety while her people were left behind to suffer.

Phila loved her for it though it broke her heart, knowing the dangers it put her through. She nodded nonetheless, though every muscle in her body urged her to drag her queen away if she had to.

"I will keep you safe then," Phila swore to her. Swore to herself.

Emmeryn smiled at her and Phila tried to ignore the sadness in her queen's eyes.

She was ugly, Krista thought.

Not that there were any titans who weren't ugly, but Ymir was one of the worst. A head too big, legs too short (though they had incredible power to them), face and teeth distorted into something barely human-like.

Ymir was an ugly thing as a titan.

Ymir was an ugly person as a human, Krista knew that better than anyone.

Krista understood that better than anyone.

She was ugly too. Fake, worthless, freaky (if Eren's words were anything to go by, though he himself wasn't one to talk if she could be frank).

They were both ugly, they knew it best, but back then they had been ugly together.

Together to know that the other wasn't ugly at all. Together to remind each other that they had worth, that there was someone out there who saw them for what they put out for others to see and for what they kept hidden from the world except each other.

Back then they had been ugly together, and had been beautiful together.

Now they were ugly and alone.

"I guess I should consider myself lucky that you always wear that scarf around your neck," Annie said, pushing her arms through her hoodie's sleeves as she and Mikasa got dressed. "No one gets to know about what we do," she continued, sounding disinterested as if she wasn't the one to bring the topic up.

Mikasa said nothing, wrapping the scarf around her neck slowly.

Annie turned back to her, face blank. "Don't worry I already told you I don't intend to tell anyone about this," she said motioning to the space between each other. "Wouldn't wanna give you know who a heart attack."

Mikasa turned at that and glared, though the effort was pointless as Annie was already making her way away from Mikasa in the empty part of the training forest they'd managed to find away from the barracks. She sighed, ignoring the weight that fell on her shoulders as she watched Annie leave. There was no point to- to whatever Mikasa was feeling. Annie had always been this way, Mikasa wasn't expecting a change in attitude.

"She likes me," Konami said over breakfast, stabbing the pancakes in front of her with glee. "She totally likes me."

Youtarou looked up to her, once he'd managed to pull himself upwards to sit in one of the chairs, with a bit of Torimaru's assistance before making he himself made his way to a chair. "Who likes you Konami?" he asked before turning to the plate Reiji placed in front of him.

"She thinks Kitora has a crush on her," Reiji supplied, passing Torimaru a plate with bacon and sunny side-up eggs.

"Why's that Konami-senpai?" Torimaru asked, stopping Youtarou's hands before he started digging in. Youtarou quickly placed his palms together and spoke, too quickly for Torimaru to make sure he'd said his thanks correctly.

"Jun told me Kitora has a crush on someone with the initial K," Konami grinned, pointing to herself. "It's gotta be me."