Scared to Death (Chris Evans x Pregnant!Reader)
A/N: I wrote this as a second installment to go along with Surprise. I'll link it down below if you want to check it out, but FYI this one can be read as a stand alone as well! Also if you know what scene from what show I was inspired by for this one, you're freaking awesome. x
Summary: Something goes wrong while you're in labor with twins.
Pairing(s): Chris Evans x Pregnant!Reader/ Wife!Reader
Warning(s): Some language, some medical stuff, mention of blood, and childbirth complications.
âThis. Sucks.â You groaned and leaned back into your pillow.
The last contraction had just subsided and it was the worst one yet.
Even with the epidural youâd had earlier, the pain was still excruciating.
âWeâre almost there,â Chris offered you a weak, tired smile.
âOh, shut up,â You glared at him. âThere is no we in this, just me. And I am not even remotely close to having these babies, Chris. Iâve been lying in this bed in labor for almost thirteen hours and I'm only at like five centimeters. How? How is it possible that Iâm only halfway there?â You groaned again, feeling hot tears of frustration prickling at your eyes. You quickly wiped them away with the back of your hand. You hadnât exactly been the easiest, nor the most pleasant person to deal with over the last several hours, and Chris had been nothing but patient, supporting and loving towards you. Youâd snapped at him, cursed at him, and there might have been a point in time where you had flung your pillow at his head during a particularly painful contraction before you had been given any drugs. "Iâm sorry, I know Iâm being insufferable right now, Chris. But I hate this. I just hate this so much.â
Chris reached out and gently stroked your hair. âI know, honey. I know it hurts and I know youâre tired. Itâs been a really long night.â He trailed his thumb softly down your cheek. âThereâs no need to apologize to me.â
Although he wasnât the one in labor, he looked just as exhausted.
You hadnât slept a wink in the last thirteen hours and neither had he.
An assigned nurse had brought in a cot for him to sleep on, but Chris, being the stubborn man that he was, refused to sleep if you couldnât.
âThings are moving really slow, Chris,â You told him after a moment. âI really donât think anythingâs going to be happening anytime soon. You need to rest.â You gestured to the cot. âItâs almost three in the morning, you should get some sleep. Iâll be okay on my own for a while.â
âIâm fine. Besides, I think coffee number three is kicking in now," Chris joked, nodding towards the growing pile of empty Starbucks cups on the bedside table. âIâm fine, really. I donât want to miss a single thing.â
You didnât have the energy to argue with him, so you simply let it go.
Letting out a small sigh, you stared up at the ceiling of your room.
The few moments you werenât in pain, your mind was busy racing.
Part of you wanted these babies out already. But another part didnât.
Youâd read all the baby books. Youâd nested and set up the nursery.
Chrisâ successful acting career made it so youâd all be financially secure.
You had everything that you could possibly need.
And yet, you felt so incredibly unprepared for what was to come.
âWhat is it?â Chris had noticed the pensive look on your face.
âIâm scared,â You murmured quietly, eyes still fixed on the ceiling.
He reached out for your hand. âI know youâre scared, but remember what the nurse said earlier, your body knows exactly what to doââ
âNo, not that,â You interrupted him. You turned, bringing your gaze to meet his and frowned. âDonât get me wrong, this is terrible. But giving birth isnât what scares me, Chris.â
âThen what does scare you?â
âThe fact that this isnât even going to be the hardest part of it all,â You laughed in spite of yourself. âWeâre about to be parents.â
Chris chuckled, lightly. âThat just now dawned on you?â
âI guess it hadnât really sunk in until now,â You admitted, sheepishly. âI know it sounds ridiculous, Iâve been pregnant for nine months and Iâm just now starting to realize that we are going to be responsible for not just one, but two lives. Weâre going to have these two little babies and we have to raise them and take care of them, and it terrifies me. What if I screw up? What if I make the wrong decisions as a mother?" There were so many anxieties beginning to surface and you couldn't believe that they decided to wait until the last possible minute to appear. âItâs scary as hell to think that one bad decision on your end could fuck up your kidâs entire life.â
âHoney, you know Iâm usually the worrywart out of the two of us and even I think that youâre overthinking it a little bit.â
âMaybe youâre underthinking it,â You retorted. âThat's a possibility.â
Chris tilted his head to the side, fighting back an amused smile.
âItâs not funny, Chris!â
He held his hands up in defense. âI know it's not, Iâm sorry.â He quickly apologized, but you could tell that he was still biting back a bit of laughter. âI have had moments where I feel overwhelmed too, baby. Iâve had a lot of those moments, actually. We might not be the perfect parents, hell I donât think those even exist. But what I do know is that weâll be good parents.â He placed a hand on your stomach. âThese little ones are so loved already and theyâre not even here yet. We have done everything that we can to prepare for them, and weâve taken the classes, read all of the books. And whatever we donât know, weâll figure it out together, somehow. Weâre going to be just fine, trust me.â
âYou really think so?â You chewed nervously on your lower lip.
âI know so,â Chris assured you with confidence. âI know itâs hard, and I know that youâre scared. But I want you to set aside your fears for just a minute and think about all of the exciting things to come. Getting to see who the twins will look like, getting to know their personalities. Moments like hearing their first words and watching them take their first steps.â
Maybe you doubted yourself as a mother, but there was no reason for you to doubt that Chris was going to be an amazing father.
âYouâre right,â You said quietly after a while.
âI have that annoying habit some times.â He winked. âStill scared?â
âAsk me that again when the twins are here.â
âNoted.â Chris sat back in his chair and yawned. âAnd just as quickly as it kicked in, coffee number three is already wearing off. Iâm going downstairs to grab another. Think youâll be okay on your own for five minutes?â
âYeah, Iâll beâoh!â You sat up slightly, bracing yourself. âContraction.â
Forgetting all about the coffee, Chris stood up, grabbed your hand and looked up at the monitor. He gave it a reassuring squeeze. âOkay, here we go. Remember, you have to do your breathing, alright?â
You felt a sudden, sharp pain shoot throughout your body.
It was agonizingly different and unlike all the others that youâve had.
At first, you had thought it was just the one abnormality. But then it was followed by another. And another. Something was wrong.
You let out something mixed in between a scream and a sob.
Chris looked at you, alarmed. Heâd watched you go through labor for the last several hours and he had not heard anything like that come out of your mouth up until now. âWhat? What is it?â
âThis isn't a contraction!â You cried, shaking your head. âChris, this isnât a contraction!â
âWhat do you mean? Whatâs wrong?â He tried to remain calm for your sake, but his heart had started racing inside of his chest.
âItâs in my back! The pain is in my back!" You sobbed, another wave of searing pain coming on and causing you to cry out. The monitor above your bed started to go off loudly as your vital signs began to change dramatically, some of them skyrocketing, and others plummeting. Then, as if that wasnât terrifying enough, the machine that monitored the babiesâ heart rates began to sound off too, the numbers flashing a dangerous red. A nurse who had heard the alarms nearby rushed into the room and you looked at her with wide, fearful eyes. "Help me, please! Something is wrong!"
âWhatâs happening to my wife?â Chris demanded, a trembling edge to his voice. He was still trying to remain calm, but between your crying and the monitor alarms going off, he was now struggling to hide his own panic.
Ignoring him, the nurse yanked your blankets back from your legs and she gasped.
Chrisâ blue eyes darkened as they filled with terror, his hand covering his mouth in shock.
âWhatâwhat is it?â You sat up a little more and glanced down to see a pool of bright red blood between your legs, staining your hospital gown as well as the hospital bedsheets. âIs that b-blood? Why is there so much blood?! Whatâs happening to me?!â
The nurse rushed to the door, poking her head out into the hallway. She shouted for a doctor, and fortunately, your obstetrician had been nearby and was in your room in an instant. She rushed over to your side and checked all of the monitors before murmuring something to the nurse, who then paged for assistance. Two more nurses came hurrying in, and was all just utter chaos. âAlright,â The doctor said, urgently but calmly. âLetâs go. We need to get her upstairs to the operating room, letâs move it.â
âOperating room?â Chris repeated, his throat going dry. âWhat do you mean? Whatâs wrong with her?â
âSir, please, we need you to step back out of the way.â A nurse pulled him away from you as everyone else worked to prepare to wheel out your bed. Within seconds, you were unhooked from all of the machines and the nurses were wheeling you out of the maternity ward and up towards the operating room.
Chris followed behind, his emotions going from worried, to scared, to angry because no one was telling him a damn thing. âDoctor, can you please tell me what the fuck is happening to my wife?! What is happening?!â He looked at you, noticing that you had gone pale, sweat dripping down your face and neck. You had also suddenly gone quiet, your eyes hardly able to remain open as if you were seconds away from losing consciousness. âPlease! I need someone to tell me what the fuck is happening to her!â
âMr. Evans, your twins are in distress. Theyâre not getting enough oxygen and we need to get her into emergency surgery now to deliver.â She spoke without even looking at him, she was too busy focused on you. âIt can be life threatening to both your wife and the babies if we don't deliver them as soon as possible.â
Chris felt his blood go cold in his veins. Life threatening? âWhat?!â
As soon as they reached the operating room, the doors swung open.
âCome on, letâs go,â The doctor urged the nurses. âRoom three. Scrub up and get her prepped. Let the NICU know weâll need some help up here with the babies.â
One of the nurses looked at Chris, who had every intention of going into that room with you. âYouâll have to wait out here, sir.â
âWhat? No! I need to be with her!â
He tried stepping around her, and the nurse held an arm out to stop him despite being a foot shorter than him.
âSir, I cannot allow you in the operating room, it is a sterile environment. Iâm sorry, but you have wait out here.â
âChris?â Somehow, through your daze, you managed to say his name, your eyelids feeling heavier and heavier with each passing second. âChris?â
âItâs going to be okay!â Chris managed to choke out behind you. âIâm right here! Iâll be right here! Everythingâs going to be okay!â He wasnât sure if he was trying to convince you or himself of it.
âThere is a waiting room around the corner to the left.â The nurse who had stopped him from entering the room with you looked at him with an empathetic expression on her face. âI understand you are worried, but we will do everything we can for your wife and babies. The doctor will come out and speak with you as soon as she can, okay?â
Unable to speak, Chris gave a weak nod of his head and she followed behind your bed as they continued to wheel you away. He could only watch helplessly as you disappeared behind a corner and the double doors of the operating room swung closed.
The next two hours that passed felt like an eternity.
Chris paced the waiting room, unable to sit still. He didnât care about the stares coming his way, nor did he care about the classless asshole who decided to sneak a picture of him with his phone.
Not knowing what was happening to you or the babies, it was hell. It was agonizing and there was absolutely nothing that he could do about it.
By hour number three, Chris had finally dropped down into a chair, his body feeling worn out.
He hunched forward, dropping his head in his hands. He was scared to death.
In his entire life, heâd never known a feeling like this before.
He didnât know what he was going to do if anything happened to you or to the babies.
âMr. Evans?â The doctor called as she emerged from the operating room.
Chris jumped to his feet, rushing over to her. âDoctor! How is she?â
âYour wife is out of surgery and in recovery. Sheâs a little groggy, but it all went well and sheâs going to be just fine.â
âAnd the babies?â He prompted anxiously. âAre they okay?â
âThe twins are still being tended to, but they are okay,â she confirmed.
Chris let out a shaky sigh of relief. âWhen can I see my wife?â
âI can take you to her room now. Follow me this way.â
He followed her to the recovery ward where you had been placed in a private room. He stopped short and nearly fell to his knees as soon as he saw you lying there, but managed to collect himself. âHey you,â he said softly, coming up to the side of your bed. He sat in the chair that had been placed next to it and gently touched the back of your hand, his fingertips lightly brushing against your cool skin. The doctor explained that it had been an invasive surgery, and as much as Chris wanted to just take you in his arms, he had to be delicate. âI hope you know that you scared the living hell out of me for a minute there.â
You were still slightly out of it, but managed to shoot him a small, tired smile. âSorry.â You were just coming out of the anesthesia, and everything before theyâd put you under was a little fuzzy, but it was all slowly starting to come back to you, piece by piece. âYou know me, I just have to make things extra dramatic. Canât ever make anything easy.â
Chris laughed, despite the tears welling in his eyes.
âHave you seen them, yet?â You asked him, softly.
âNo.â He sniffed, shaking his head. âNot yet.â
As if on cue, two nurses entered your room, each of them wheeling in a bassinet. There was a tightly wrapped little bundle in each one.
Chris automatically rose to his feet, his heart fluttering wildly in his chest.
âCongratulations,â One of the nurses beamed, bringing the bassinets up beside your bed. âA healthy baby boyâand a healthy baby girl. We will be back for them in a couple of hours to run some more standard tests. If you need anything, please call us.â They excused themselves, leaving the room so you and Chris could have some private time with the twins.
You watched as Chris slowly walked over to them, an emotional lump rising in your throat.
âHey there,â he cooed to them. âHey guys.â
The feeling that he had seeing their two little faces was inexplicable.
It took Chris a moment, but he then realized it was a feeling similar to the one that he had felt when he had first fallen in love with you.
âIâm your daddy," he told them through a tearful smile. âHi guys.â
âHey, I want to see them too,â You whined. âCome help me up.â
âHoney, you just had surgeryââ
âChris, please don't make me beg you. Because I will. Shamelessly.â
Chris shot you a reluctant look. He couldnât say no to you.
âOkay, but we have to be really careful. Come here.â He slid an arm around your back and gingerly helped you into a sitting position so that you could have a better view of the twins. He noticed how you were biting your lip as you craned your neck and tried to get a better look them and instantly knew what you were thinking. Chris walked over to the bassinets again and carefully lifted his son from one of them. It was almost surreal, watching him hold his child for the first time. The look of pure adoration on his face as he smiled down at the baby was almost too much for your heart handle. âHere. Hold out your arms.â Chris delicately helped you take the baby into your arms. âYou got him?â
You nodded, feeling a tear slip down the side of your face. âI got him.â
âCan't forget about this little angel.â He picked up his daughter, who looked identical to her brotherâthe only thing that helped you two tell them apart were the standard hospital blankets that they were wrapped in, one pink and one blue. Holding her, Chris managed to squeeze next to you, perching himself on your bed. He made sure that you werenât in any discomfort before finally relaxing with his baby girl in his arms.
âI canât believe this,â You whispered, looking from one tiny face to the other. âI can't believe theyâre actually ours. Theyâre so perfect.â
âMust take after you,â Chris grinned, turning to you. He noticed how it just felt so natural to see you sitting there holding your newborn. You, the same woman who was expressing how scared she was becoming a mother earlier during labor, the same woman who had just been through a life threatening birth complication, looked so incredibly calm and relaxed. It might have been your maternal instincts that were kicking in, but you didnât seem worried about anything at all. âAre you still scared?â
âNope,â You replied, grazing your son's soft cheek with your finger as you grinned back at Chris. âIâm not scared anymore. Now that theyâre here in our arms, everything feels right and the fear is just gone. Iâm ready for this, Chris. Iâm ready for this chapter of my life with you and our children.â
âThat's my girl,â he whispered proudly, leaning towards you. "I love you."
You leaned in too, giving him a kiss. âI love you too.â