You poisoned me, and I poisoned your memories of me.
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You poisoned me, and I poisoned your memories of me.

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I learned how to be full on my own again. I gave myself the love I had been giving to everyone else. That’s when I found him. The man who completes me when I finally thought I was complete on my own. I stopped believing in finding my other half, because I assumed I was whole on my own. I was whole on my own. But now I’m overfilled with every ounce of love in my life.
I knew the love was gone, I just didn’t want us to be gone too.
I thank you for all the times you were on my mind and kept the demons away from my thoughts, but now you’re gone and it’s their turn again.
It hurts to not wake up to a goodmorning message on a day you need it the most

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I’m no longer blinded by love. I wish I was still in the dark.
An eye for an eyes makes the whole world blind. Right now, our world is blind. We can not see anything from a distance. Everyone is viewing each other from the outside. Any and all assumptions are being made. Cops are being taken away from their own loved ones. Protestors are being taken away from theirs too. People trying to get home from rodeos and barrel races are having to mourn the loss of their horses because they decided to drive through a protest. Everyone is not seeing the big picture. We all have blinders on. For some f’ed up reason, we’re all okay with what we’re seeing. Because we believe that somewhere it can be justified. But it can’t be.
A black human can not be killed just because of a racist cop, but they are. They can not be killed just because there was an assumption made that he was a threat, but they are.
A cop can not be killed just because he’s a cop, but they are. “They made the choice to take that job and all the risks”. No. Their choice was to serve and protect, even if that meant die doing so. Not to be murdered in cold blood.
A retired police chief can not be killed just because he wanted to protect a store from looters, but he was. He wanted to serve and protect, even in his old age.
Things happen, and no, they can’t be justified. At some point we must start to care about everyone. At some point we must realize that not everyone is who you believe them to be. At some point, we must stop grouping everyone separately. We’re all humans. Every single one of us, no matter race and no matter the line of work, tend to make mistakes.
Cops have families too. Everyone has families. There’s hundreds of families mourning right now. Even more families are scared. Scared for their loved ones. This world is cruel, and they’re scared. Throwing bricks isn’t helping calm things down. Neither is pepper spray and rubber bullets. But you know what? All of them provide a sense of ease to those who use them because we’re all scared. We’re all human and we all have fears.
“An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind” and you know what? Our world is as blind as it can be right now.
Sometimes I write the most painful of my words down with a scented pen. Something needs to be sweet about them, even if it is just their scent.
I hope one day they name a natural disaster after you. That way, I won’t be the only one who suffered from the sweet sound of your name.
That’s not how love starts; that’s how a game is started.

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I have never been afraid to lose somebody before. But now you, you’re a different story. I’m terrified. I’m petrified. I’m any synonym you want to use to say I’m scared of losing you.
It was never about a lack of love, but a lack of connection.
I don’t want your pity. I just want your love to fill this void.
I got attached to him because we were always fighting. I had no other choice than to have a tight grip on my love for him. I wasn’t prepared to lose him from letting go too soon.
We said we would change to make it work. But we couldn’t. Especially not in the way we needed to. Especially not for each other.

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What should have broke me, just hurt me.
What should have just hurt me, broke me.
The sun has risen, can we try again now?