Oh, the shame

When the rumor the autobots have been hearing turned out to be true, it gained a lot of reactions. Shock, confusion, dread, even disgust. It was a hard pill to swallow.

But after the third time, they just got competitive instead.

Yes, but not as much as he’d been during his fourth (and last) gestation. The first three pregnancies had been a breeze, until he finally carried a tank baby. The whole gestation took a huge toll on him, to the point where he’d drop his ego and sought Megs’ comfort. Megatron had never seen Starscream so vulnerable in millions of years of knowing him.

And was Starscream ever self conscious about his appearance during the pregnancy?

During his very first gestation when his bump was just starting to show, he’d threaten ANYONE who dared to go near him. But as the new spark grew and his carrier protocols took over, he became mellowed out enough to accept Megatron’s affection and even let him smother his stupid face into his growing bump (and the baby did actually kick Megs in the face)

And yes. VERY. He’s a vain bot after all. The only thing that managed to quell his worry is because Megatron found his increasingly large form hot.

Contrary to popular belief, it’s Megatron who usually gets morning sickness (which Starscream enjoys almost immensely until the contractions ruin his mood)

Normally the notion of being cared for disgusts Starscream. But Megatron’s sire protocols have turned him into a sap, and Starscream is already emotionally and physically vulnerable as it is so he just allows Megatron to spoil him. He loves the attention anyway. AND the foot massage.

Calm Starscream moments are very few and far between. Megs was wise enough to keep his distance and thoughts to himself here so he could cherish the rare silence.

Most days during Starscream’s gestation, however:

PROPAGANDA:

[Odysseus]

"Look. I submitted him last time. I've already made a legacy for myself. Jorge Rivera-Herrans himself found out about the poll and I'm mortified about it every day.

IS THAT GONNA STOP ME FROM TRYING TO PUT A BABY IN THE ODUSSY??? ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT!!!!

This is an adaptation of the Odyssey where Odysseus is 10000% faithful to his wife, Penelope. He's down bad. She could do it. I've read her do it in fanfic.

But also this fandom has the manwhore AU (courtesy of animatic artist and Tumblr user anniflamma) where Odysseus SLUTS OUT to save his crew. He sluts out for Poseidon. He sluts out for Zeus. (Maybe he sluts out for Hermes? All the Hermes/Odysseus interactions are incredibly fruity).

ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, SOMEONE IS GETTING THIS MAN PREGNANT!"

"Look this is less about needing Odysseus to be pregnant (though I'm not disregarding the idea 👀) and more about believing that Penelope of Sparta is the og "if any woman could knock up her husband, it's her" type of woman and Odysseus would be 10000% down for it just because it's Penelope asking. Like yeah Epic the Musical is newly finished, but the tale of Odysseus simping for his wife and costing people their lives along the way back to her is over 2000 years old. (And I mean, they had mpreg stories back then, but it was like, Athena bursting out of Zeus' forehead 🤷)." (*This is a resubmission of propaganda from last season, but not from the original submitter)

"He's just. Such a guy. He's a gentleman. Very loyal and loves his wife. Already has a kid but damn he needs another. His wife tops you cannot convince me otherwise. He can killed 108 men out of sheer absolute rage but also “PenEoLPe WHYY~ you know im too shy~~” at the same time. He is girlboss. He is malewife and according to the media has amazing thighs. He might be a bisexual. Go listen to the cut song “appetite” (trust me on this bro) a siren thought he was a girl dad and no matter how wrong she was she was also totally right. I don’t want to do it but it’s a: “Guards, impregnate that man!” Situation Please bro."

"That man is bottom-coded and I think Penelope would want him pregnant."

"Come on! Look at him! The man that spent twenty years trying to get back to his wife isn't the one getting pregnant? Also please, have you LOOKED at his wife? The woman from Sparta? She's the one getting him pregnant 100%. Plus, he made it pretty far last time! (Also there's a community that ships him with almost every other character and he's almost never the top there so)."

"He is the optimal form of malewife, trekking over seas for a whole decade to find his beloved wife and i think he would enjoy being allowed to carry Penelope's child."

"Tragic manwhore who misses his wife and child and has huge pecs. Perfect for feeding baby."

[Prowl]

"I want to study the child he has for new forms of mental illness. Also he has huge tits."

"This man. He needs a baby. He'd be such a bad parent, but I need it to happen."

PROPAGANDA:

[Odysseus]

"Look. I submitted him last time. I've already made a legacy for myself. Jorge Rivera-Herrans himself found out about the poll and I'm mortified about it every day.

IS THAT GONNA STOP ME FROM TRYING TO PUT A BABY IN THE ODUSSY??? ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT!!!!

This is an adaptation of the Odyssey where Odysseus is 10000% faithful to his wife, Penelope. He's down bad. She could do it. I've read her do it in fanfic.

But also this fandom has the manwhore AU (courtesy of animatic artist and Tumblr user anniflamma) where Odysseus SLUTS OUT to save his crew. He sluts out for Poseidon. He sluts out for Zeus. (Maybe he sluts out for Hermes? All the Hermes/Odysseus interactions are incredibly fruity).

ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, SOMEONE IS GETTING THIS MAN PREGNANT!"

"Look this is less about needing Odysseus to be pregnant (though I'm not disregarding the idea 👀) and more about believing that Penelope of Sparta is the og "if any woman could knock up her husband, it's her" type of woman and Odysseus would be 10000% down for it just because it's Penelope asking. Like yeah Epic the Musical is newly finished, but the tale of Odysseus simping for his wife and costing people their lives along the way back to her is over 2000 years old. (And I mean, they had mpreg stories back then, but it was like, Athena bursting out of Zeus' forehead 🤷)." (*This is a resubmission of propaganda from last season, but not from the original submitter)

"He's just. Such a guy. He's a gentleman. Very loyal and loves his wife. Already has a kid but damn he needs another. His wife tops you cannot convince me otherwise. He can killed 108 men out of sheer absolute rage but also “PenEoLPe WHYY~ you know im too shy~~” at the same time. He is girlboss. He is malewife and according to the media has amazing thighs. He might be a bisexual. Go listen to the cut song “appetite” (trust me on this bro) a siren thought he was a girl dad and no matter how wrong she was she was also totally right. I don’t want to do it but it’s a: “Guards, impregnate that man!” Situation Please bro."

"That man is bottom-coded and I think Penelope would want him pregnant."

"Come on! Look at him! The man that spent twenty years trying to get back to his wife isn't the one getting pregnant? Also please, have you LOOKED at his wife? The woman from Sparta? She's the one getting him pregnant 100%. Plus, he made it pretty far last time! (Also there's a community that ships him with almost every other character and he's almost never the top there so)."

"He is the optimal form of malewife, trekking over seas for a whole decade to find his beloved wife and i think he would enjoy being allowed to carry Penelope's child."

"Tragic manwhore who misses his wife and child and has huge pecs. Perfect for feeding baby."

[Prowl]

"I want to study the child he has for new forms of mental illness. Also he has huge tits."

"This man. He needs a baby. He'd be such a bad parent, but I need it to happen."

AND VELOCITY?????????????? SPREAD THOSE VALVE LIPS OPEN BABY MAMA WANTS TO GO IN HIDING FROM THE US FORCES AFTER HER REGIME CRUMBLED IN 2003 👅👅👅👅👅

*A gnome runs past me*

Woah what was that. Did you guys see that