c!sam angst in january: my friends are being corrupted by an evil magic egg and im sad :(
c!sam angst in april: i am torn between my ambitions, my desire to keep the server safe, and my desire to protect the people i love. my actions indirectly led to the death of the person i wanted to save the most, and the guilt is destroying me from the inside out. i have become desensitized to torture. sometimes it is easier to slip into a numb, cold persona and commit horrible atrocities in the name of the greater good. i am slowly losing my humanity. i cut off the love of my life’s hand when he refused to give me back the prison keys he stole. i am trapped in my role as the warden as much as dream is trapped in his role as the prisoner. i can never truly rest or be at peace because this burden is not something anyone else should have to carry. my old friend is taking advantage of my guilt and business partnership with him to further his own ambitions. my other friends are still being corrupted by an evil magic egg, but even though they betrayed my trust and trapped me in a 1x2 box for hours on end, leading to me eating my own flesh to survive, i am desperate for any semblance of normalcy and will cling to any shred of remorse they might show for it, forgiving them without question. i canonically cry myself to sleep every night
c!sam angst in february 2022:
