i don't know how to end a story.

"Happy Birthday, @myjaps." Julie's staring at that one particular tweet. For an hour. Or two maybe? She lost count. Well, why not? It was from him. Yes, him. Elmo. You read it right. The Elmo Magalona greeted her on her birthday. Hindi nga lang tulad ng greetings for Janella na punong-puno ng effort. Pero, at least di ba? Hindi niya nakalimutan. Bumati siya. It was also past May 17th. Kaya biglang-bigla, at gulat na gulat siya. "Bugak ka talaga Elmo eh." Sabunot ni Julie sa sarili. You can't snatch it away from her. Yung ganung effect ni Elmo sakanya. No one can, actually. Kahit yung rumored boyfriend niya pa. Elmo yan eh. Ben lang yun. Julie revisited Elmo's twitter account. Napangiti siya when she saw that tweet again. Yung totoo? Kinikilig siya. Kaninang-kanina pa. She also saw his photo that he tweeted on Mother's Day. Napatawa siya. It was not the first time she saw it. Marami na ring nag-tag sakanya non. "Sume-sense of humor ang Mokong." Sabi niya na tumatawa. Sabay haplos sa mukha ng gwapong dating ka-loveteam. Parang nung sa Yellow Note. Medyo same feelings pa nga eh. She scroll down below at nakita niya yung mga replies dun sa picture. So, may something pala sa loveteam nila ni Janella yung 'Meow'. Uminit ang ulo niya. Is she jealous? Imposible. May boyfriend siya eh. Sinara niya ang laptop. Take note! Pabagsak ha. Hindi basta-basta sinara lang. Walang pag-turn off. Selos nga. She find herself na gegewang-gewang pababa ng hagdan. Kukuha lang sana siya ng tubig na maiinom. Julie's a bit tipsy. Konti lang naman ang nainom niya. Pero, for a person na hindi sanay sa alcoholic drink, may iba talagang epekto. Safe naman siyang nakabalik sa room niya. Pabagsak na humiga sa kama at nagtakip ng unan sa mukha. Sakto kase, "Bwiset ka Elmo!!!" sigaw niya. Madaling-araw na. Ayaw naman niyang maistorbo ang pamilya niya. Dahil lang sa kabaliwan niya. She grabbed her phone and fidget. She doesn't know what to do. Bigla na lang she tap the Music icon on her new iPhone. She stared on a super familiar song na kaka-purchase niya lang ulit sa iTunes. CSN - Elmo Magalona "Bakit ba ganito ang album cover mo? Sana man lang mukha mo." She grinned. "I actually love staring at your beautiful face. Your eyes are my favorite." Bulong niya. She looked for her earphones and plugged it onto her phone and started listening. She's smiling. The whole damn time. "Sobra yung inimprove ng boses mo. Pero ganon pa rin yung effect. Nakaka-inlove." She said. She wanted to hear and see all versions of this new Cold Summer Night. She opened youtube on her laptop. There were versions nung sila pa yung magka-tandem. She was feeling nostalgia. "Grabe! Ang tagal na pala." Sa isip niya. Medyo nalungkot siya going down memory lane. Kase nga naman, ito na sila ngayon oh: hindi nagpapansinan. May nakita siyang most recent videos na version din nung song. It was the one with his new ka-loveteam. Si Janella. When he was a guest sa isang parang mini-concert. Huminga siya ng malalim before hitting the play button. While listening to it, may kakaibang naramdaman si Julie. Was it guilt? Bakit naman? Or jealousy? Mas possible yan. She hold her phone tight and dialed a familiar number na kabisado ng puso niya. Sakto naman pala kase, she still have his old number. While dialing, she's praying to all the gods na sana yun pa rin yung number na gamit niya. "Hala nag-ring." Gulat na sabi ni Julie. Isang ring lang, binaba niya na. Hindi pa ba talaga siya ready? Baka nga. She played another video. Another version na surprise pang lumabas si Janella. The song's launch sa ASAP. The one where she did the rap verse. Napa-ismid si Julie. Ayun na naman yung naramdaman niya kanina. "Bwiset. Bwiset." Sabi niya. And, dialed his number for the second time. Tatlong ring. Cancelled. Nasisiraan na yata siya ng bait. Nagtakip ulit siya ng unan sa mukha. Yung favorite niyang Elmo the Muppet na pillow. Sumigaw, "Elmo, bwiset ka. Bwiset." Habang pumapadyak sa kama niya. Nabaliw na nga ng tuluyan. Sa sobrang ingay niya. Hindi niya na narinig yung phone niya. May tumatawag. Returning a phone call. Si Elmo. Si Elmo tumatawag. Si Elmo, tinatawagan siya. And it stopped. Ang tagal na rin namang nagriring eh. May tumatawag ulit. This time, sinagot na ni Julie. Hindi pa nga nakakapag-hello yung nasa kabilang linya, inunahan niya na, "Elmo, bwiset ka." sabi niya, sabay baba ng phone. Natawa siya sa saril niya. Hindi niya akalain na masasabi niya yun. Naguguluhan siya ng may biglang nag-notify sa phone niya. It was a twitter notification. May bagong tweet si Elmo. Hello. Of course she subscribed from his tweets. Hindi naman nito malalaman eh. Stalking at its finest yan. "Ganun na pala magthank you ngayon" Natawa siya. Tawang-tawa siya. Hanggang sa may tumatawag na naman. Hindi lang basta call 'yun. Kase, it was an invite through Facetime. Huminga siya ng malalim and accepted the invite. "Well, hello, Julie." Namiss ni Julie yung boses na yun. Natulala lang siya. "Why are you still awake? Nasa bahay ka ba? Or nasa taping?" He asked. "Bahay." Absent-minded niyang sagot. Napa-smirk si Elmo. That is very familiar to her. Sobrang familiar. "Ahh. Okay. So, you have early call time kaya gising ka na?" He's trying to make a conversation. Umiling lang si Julie bilang sagot. Wala pa rin sa sarili. "Ang pogi mo." She said. Wala nga sa sarili. "Alam ko." Natatawa at mayabang na sagot ni Elmo. May sasabihin na sana si Julie. She was trying to redeem herself. Pero, wala eh. Nauna pa rin si Elmo. Tulad ng dati, mabilis pa rin talaga magsalita. "Bakit pala napatawag ka? Tapos, sinabihan mo pa ako ng bwiset ako?" Bumalik na kay Julie lahat. "Eh bwiset ka naman talaga eh." Napa-awang ang bibig ni Elmo. "Una, bakit ba bigla-bigla ka na lang magtu-tweet? Ha?" Sasagot naman dapat si Elmo. Pero, pinipigil siya ni Julie. "Pangalawa, bakit mas lalong gumaling ka ng kumanta?" Napa-iwas naman bigla si Julie ng tingin. "Dahil ba sakanya? Tinuruan ka ba niya?" "At, pangatlo. Mas magaling pa rin akong mag-rap sakanya. Mas bagay pa rin yung boses nating dalawa." Elmo was surprised. He doesn't know saan ba galing lahat ng 'yon. Sa sobrang pagkalito, he asked, "Where are all these coming from? What happened?" nag-aalala niyang tanong. "Well, I'm drunked. Konti lang naman. Need ko lang din ng lakas ng loob to ask you all those." Elmo gave her a straight face. "Aww. Bakit ka naman uminom, baby?" Pareho silang nagulat sa sinabi niya. "I'm sorry. I mean, Julie." Bawi niya. "Kase naman. You confused me." She said. He felt like, she just want an answer. "Okay. I'm sorry if this confused you. Gusto ko lang din talagang i-greet ka. This is an important day for you di ba? It was once an important day for me too." He smiled. "Medyo late na nga. Kase, busy ako kahapon sa taping." Kamot-ulo niyang pahabol. She felt it. That familiar pang in her heart. She missed those. "For your second question. I am attending voice lessons. Since lumipat ako, they've been so good to me." Julie's waiting for further more. "It was not really because of her. It was all because I wanted to put an effort to this. Ever since naman my dad died, mas naging passion ko na yung pagkanta." Smile is evident to his voice. "Miss ko na nga rin yung dati kong voice coach eh. Nakalimutan na niya ako." Iwas naman si Julie. "Loko lang Julie. Pero, sana nga, if may time ka, try mo ulit na i-coach ako. Effective ka naman eh." May kilig na naramdaman si Julie. Tinago niya lang. "Well, for the 3rd question. Which is yung pinakamahirap sagutin." He grinned. "Don't compare yourself to her. Janella have her own style pagdating sa music. Pero sige, let's give it to you kase birthday mo naman. Mas may swag ka talaga when it comes to rapping. You can easily mirror my ways in rapping kase eh." Tawa niya. "Pero, seriously Julie. Wag mo i-compare. Magkaiba kayo. She's special. And you are too. Magkaiba kayo ng ways of being special to me." She smiled. A bit weak. "You like her?" She asked. Yumuko si Elmo, and answered, "Yes." Julie's in the midst of crying. "Julie di ba may Ben ka na?" A tear fell. Habang nakayuko siya. And then, she nod. "Pero, gusto ko akin ka pa rin." Umiiyak niyang sagot. She's emotional. Maybe, dala na rin ng alak sa katawan niya. "Julie. Look at me." Umangat naman ang ulo niya and faced him. "Hindi kase pwede yun eh. Kung ako, ako lang. Kung siya, siya lang." He gave her a weak smile. "Medyo matagal din akong na-stuck sayo eh. Now that my heart is starting to be happy, ito ka na naman." "Ang unfair lang eh." Dagdag ni Elmo. "Am I the one to blame? Kung hindi ba ako naging ma-pride. Pwedeng sa akin ka pa rin?" Natawa si Elmo. Yung mapakla. "As long as alam kong ako lang Julie. Sapat na yun. Kahit pa naging ma-pride ka, ayos lang. Basta sana ako lang eh." "Alam ko naman that I've hurt you Moe eh. Ito na ba yung price nun? Hindi pala okay sa pakiramdam na makita kang masaya kasama siya. I am seeing myself to her. Yun nga ata yung mas mahirap eh. Kase, madali niya akong mapapalitan." Saad ni Julie. "Miss na miss na kita, Moe." "Mas miss na miss na kita, Julie. If you ever knew." "Sabi mo nga sa song mo, is there any way for you to turn around and come back? It has been years. Sawa na din ako na ganito tayo. Yung parang hindi magkakilala." Elmo smiled at her. Yung may pagmamahal. "It'll be a matter of time, baby." Julie was too focus on him. "Let's give it some time. Iba kase yung nasa puso mo ngayon eh. Iba din yung sinasabi ng utak mo. At lalong iba yung sinasabi ng bibig mo, dahil nakainom ka. You are under the influence of an alcohol. So, let's not trust that, okay?" Tumango-tango si Julie. "Kasalanan ko din naman Julie. Hinayaan ko lang na hindi ka tumawag. Na, hindi ka nakapagpaliwanag. Don't put all the blame on you, okay?" "Wag ka na rin, umiyak. Okay?" Puro pagtango lang ang sagot ni Julie. Kanina, siya itong madaldal. "There will always be Julie and Elmo along the way. Let them find their way back into each other." "Thank you, Elmo." Natawa si Elmo. "Bakit? Anong nakakatawa?" "That was the answer I'm looking for kanina. Hindi yung bwiset ako." Sabay na silang natawa. Masaya sila na at least nakapag-usap sila. Gusto pa rin naman pala nila ang isa't-isa. Mukhang madaming magiging masaya na malaman yon. Kaso, hindi pa nila pwedeng i-share sa lahat. It's complicated. "Julie, you sleep. You look tired." Pupungay-pungay na rin kase ang mata niya. "Sing for me please." They look at each other and smiled. "Just like 2012." Sabay nilang sabi. Ano pa nga bang bagay na kantahin sa situation nila ngayon? Of course. Cold Summer Night. Julie was so happy that finally, she talked to him. And he made her feel in love again. She's starting to close her eyes. And he was happy and satisfied. "I miss you baby. I need you here."

"You seem happy. And it was not because of me anymore." I was walking through studio 7's hallway when I saw you. With him. Naka-upo kayo. You are waiting na tawagin para makapag-rehearse. You two are holding hands. Looking so in love. Masakit. Na makita kang masaya kasama siya. Well. I want a second chance. Kaya nandito ako. Nagbabakasakali. I'm praying and hoping na tatanggapin mo ulit ako. Pero, parang late na ako. Sobrang late na nga yata. You are smiling. Napapangiti ka niya. Ngumingiti ka ng dahil sakanya. Masakit. Pero, I'm still happy that you're happy. "Ang ganda-ganda mo." Nasabi ko sa sarili ko. "I miss you, Julie." I said it aloud. But, you didn't hear me. Miss na miss ko na yung Julie na matatawag kong akin. Miss na miss ko na siya. Babalik ka pa ba? I'm still looking at you two. Ang saya niyo. Inggit na inggit ako. Nagtatawanan kayo. Unti-unting pinapatay ako. Tumayo ka. Hinihila mo siya. Habang tumatawa. Kunwari ayaw niyang tumayo. Sumenyas siya. He is asking for a kiss. Tinuro niya yung pisngi niya habang naka-pout. "Aww. Nagpapa-cute ang baby." Sabi mo. Malakas yon. Feeling ko tuloy pinaparinggan mo ko. Yung tipong, pinaparinig mo talaga sakin. Lumakas kase lalo nung sinabi mo yung word na 'baby'. Ang sakit naman nun. Bigla mo siyang niyakap. You kneeled down para magkapantay kayo. And, and you kissed him. Masakit. Nakaka-inggit. Tinignan ko siya. Mukhang kinilig siya. Ganon pala talaga yung epekto mo sakanya no? Tama nga sila. Halata sa ngiti niya. Ramdam kong mahal ka niya. Pero, mahal din kita. Mahal pa rin kita. "I love you baby." Sabi niya. Gusto kong sumigaw din. Aminin sa lahat ng tao dito kung gaano pa kita kamahal. "I love you too." You replied. Nakakainggit pala talaga na sa iba mo na yan sinasabi no? Sana ako pa rin yung kasama mo. Sana ako na lang yung nasa lugar niya. Mahal pa rin naman kita eh. Nagulat ako kase, you two look at the side where I am at. Agad akong nagtago. Sa sobrang kaba ko, nalampasan niyo na pala ako. Wala akong kamalay-malay. Tulad ng pagkawala ko ng malay na siya na pala yung gusto mo. Siya na pala yung mahal mo. I was your first boyfriend. But, I took you for granted. Sorry. Nasaktan kita. Totoong nung una sinubukan ko lang naman na ligawan ka. Sikat na sikat ka nun eh. Baka sakaling ako din, sumikat. It was my dream. Hindi ko yun sinasadya. What I didn't know is totoo na pala. Totoo na palang mahal kita. Sinayang ko no? Pasensya ka na. I tried to find where are you. Nasa Green Room pala kayo. Your mom looked for you. Kaya pala umalis muna kayo. Hayaan mo na lang muna ako na gawin 'to. Ang tignan ka sa malayo. I smiled when I saw your siblings. Jac and Joanna. Naging close din naman kase kame. Nung tayo pa. I am happy to see them. "Hi, Kuya." Jac was so excited to see him. I felt naman na she liked me for you nung tayo pa. Pero, iba si Jac kapag kasama siya. She was so comfortable with him. I never heard her laugh like that before. Buong pamilya mo yung napapasaya niya. By standing there. By being with you. Ako kase, I tried everything to fit in. That is how much I love you, Julie. Your mom is talking to you. Hindi ko marinig. Ang layo niyo eh. Sobrang layo mo. Sobrang layo mo na sa akin. Ang dami kong sinayang. Nakikipaglaro siya sa mga kapatid mo, then your father came. Buti hindi niya ako napansin. He greeted your father. "Hi, Tito." Nainggit ako. The entire time that we're together, kung hindi Sir ang tawag ko sakanya, e Mr. San Jose. Ang bias no? Dati pa lang ba talo na niya ako? "Hi, son." Your father said. Talo nga ako. Talong-talo na niya ako. Hindi lang sayo. Pati sa buong Pamilya mo. Masakit. Magpapa-alam pala sila sayo. Tuloy na pala yung pangarap niyong mag-vacation out of the country. Their flight is a day early than yours, kase may mga showbiz commitments ka pa. They trusted him more than they trusted me no? Iniwan ka nila sakanya eh. Dun ka na daw matulog sa condo niya. Walastik. Nung tayo pa, hindi nga pwede yung mga surprise visits eh. Kailangan ipagpaalam ka pa. At lalong hindi pwedeng tayo lang na dalawa. Bakit ganon? Yung points niya 10 na, ako negative 1 pa rin. "Baby, are you excited?" He asked. "Yes, baby yes." You answered habang tumatalon at pagkatapos ay yumakap ka sakanya. He smiled. Mukha namang totoo. "Thank you for arranging everything and for making this happen. I love you, I love you. I love you." Sa bawat I love you, you are kissing him. Hindi ako nakaramdam ng kahit ano. Parang namanhid na ako. Parang nasasanay na ako sa thought na meron na talagang 'kayo' at wala ng 'tayo'. Mali kase si Ed Sheeran dun sa sinabi niya na 'Ain't nobody love you like I do', kase, mahal ka din niya eh. Mas mahal ka pa nga yata niya kesa sa sarili niya. I shed a tear. Mabuti na lang nakalabas na kayo. Nakakakahiya eh. Mahal na mahal ka din niya, Julie. Bagay nga kayo eh. Pero sana tayo na lang. Kase, mahal pa kita. Mahal na mahal pa kita. "Uy Pare! Tama na yan." Someone tap me on my shoulders. Si Ruru. Nakita niya ako. I smiled and I shake it off. Tina-try ko pa rin itago. "Pare! Nakikita ka namin. Kanina pa. Dun pa lang sa hallway." Akala ko walang nakakapansin. "Hinayaan ka na lang namin kase baka if you see it for yourself mas madali mong matatanggap." I'm about to say something nang pinagpatuloy niya. "Julie is happy with Elmo, Pare. She seems happier." He gave me a smile. "Sobrang mahal siya ni Elmo, Ben. And, alam naman nating pareho how Julie love him too. Kahit dati pa." Tumingin ako dun sa kung nasaan sila kanina. "Surrender na tayo, Pare ha? Be happy for her. You'll be happy too." Sabi niya at umalis na. Ang gulo-gulo na ng isip ko. I am here para makuha siya ulit di ba? Bakit ganito? Parang kabaligtaran ng lahat ng plano ko. Ang hirap. Ang hirap masaktan. Binalak ko ng umuwi when I heard you sing. Rehearsals. It was a familiar song. It was 'Baby You Are' - the first song you've written. And it was for him -- for Elmo. It was familiar for me kase I heard it before. Pero para kay Elmo, he's home. You're looking at one direction while singing. Siyempre, kay Elmo. Kanina medyo tanggap ko na, pero, ang sakit pa rin pala. Ako yung unang boyfriend. Pero, si Elmo yung unang minahal. Ako yung pinakilala sa buong mundo. Pero, si Elmo, siya yung naging mundo. Ako yung laging kasama. Pero, si Elmo yung hinahanap. Dati pa, talo na ako. Dati pa, siya na ang nanalo. I look at him. Bakit ganon? I felt na yung smile niya for her is genuine. I shouldn't feel that right? Kase di ba I am winning her back? Pero kase, talong-talo na ako eh. They are happy with each other. Mahal nila ang isa't-isa. Dati na akong naging kontrabida sa love story nila. I think, it is time for their happy ending. Dapat pa ba akong humadlang? Tumabi ako kung saan naka-upo si Elmo. Habang nasa backstage si Julie. "Magalona!" Gulat siyang lumingon sa akin. "Alves!" Hamon niyang sagot. "Ingatan mo na yan ha? Kase kapag pinakawalan mo pa, I'll be there in a second." He smiled. "I already knew her worth. I won't let anyone get her from me. We are happy. I hope you can find it in yourself to be happy too." And then, I left. I opened my tumblr account and wrote: "Dear Boo, You look happier. But, if he hurt you, just know that I will wait for you. Truly, Boo" I locked my phone. And, I closed my eyes. I am seeing you. But, you are with him. "Julie, you look happier. You do. Elmo made you the happiest. I think I'll be fine."

"Let us all welcome, Mr. Elmo Magalona." Hands clapping, lips smiling. The people are so warm. That made me happy, excited and kabado all at the same time. "Good Morning, everyone. Thank you all for coming. I know, this will be fun." I greeted them. Today is June 30, 2021. Everyone's ready for my movie's press conference. The media people are all here. "May we request Direk Paul Soriano to join us here?" The host announced. Here comes the best director ever. Sumaludo siya sa akin at nagyakap kame. Direk Paul was asked about our experience while doing the movie. "Masaya. Sobrang chill nung atmosphere. Lahat ng bumuo ng pelikulang ito sobrang cool. It's like, everyone's cherry picked, kase first day pa lang nagkasundo na ang lahat. The staff and the crew. And of course, the actors. Si Elmo magaling. Magaling siya." He looked at everyone of us at nag-bow. This is a once in a lifetime chance kaya sobrang proud ako sa kung ano yung naging outcome. "Now, Elmo, pwede mo ba kaming ipakilala kay Chris?" The host asked. I smiled at her and answered. "Yes. Of course. Well, Chris. He looked like a typical guy, yung parang just a random guy that you meet na hindi tatatak sayo. Pero, hindi. There is something about him that made him so special." I am hoping to get everyone's attention and continued. "Chris is The Heir." I smiled. That was the movie. The Heir. One of the media people throw his question. "Sabi nila, there is a big chance na you can be nominated for this movie or even manalo ng mismong award." I got surprised with his words. Nagulat ako. More of like overwhelmed. Direk Paul opted to answer. "I am very positive with that. He was so natural when we are filming. Sabi nga namin, sobrang nag-level up siya pagdating sa acting." Sobrang nakakataba ng puso na marinig yon galing sa isa sa mga hinahangaan mo sa industry. "Thank you, Direk Paul." Nahihiya kong sabi. "Chris here is a lawyer na may gustong patunayan mula sa mga taong nakapaligid sakanya. He will always use his charm para makuha ang atensyon ng katapatang lawyer. They are all girls na sa huli ay papaasahin niya lang din. He do sex and stuff. Laging walang closure. Pero ang pinaka goal niya ay maging pinakamagaling na abogado para malinis ang pangalan ng tatay niya." Mahaba kong pag-explain. I felt like they are now to ask questions about me. About my personal life. Why are they so interested with that? Boring nga eh. "Elmo, kagaya ka ba ni Chris? Sa mga naging relationship mo, wala ring closure?" One asked. Napaisip ako. Isa lang siyang pumasok sa isip ko. Napa-iling ako while napapakamot sa batok. "There is always a closure. Except for one." I felt like mas naging interesado pa sila sa mga susunod na sagot ko. "Can you make kwento about it?" A girl asked. "Ano kase eh." Hindi ako bigla mapakali. "We just wanna know. And malay mo, after this, magkaron na kayo ng closure." She added. Convincing me. "You got a point there. Well. Okay." Sagot ko. "Bigla na lang kase kameng hindi nag-usap." Panimula ko. "I know for a fact na kasalanan ko why." Dugtong ko. "Ahm. I think, our relationship lasted for 4 or 5 years. Or, possible na it's still counting. Since, wala nga kasing closure." Natawa naman silang lahat don. "You're around what age niyan?" A guy asked. I believe, he's from the papers. Or magazines, maybe. "I'm 18. We're both 18. But, what we had was real. Sobra. Tapos, ayun, I think, 22 ako non na parang bigla na lang gumulo." Sagot ko while remembering. "I stopped calling her. Hindi ko na rin bigla sinagot yung mga calls and texts niya." The girls were not impressed. "Nagselos ako eh. Nasaktan. Ganon." Bigla akong natawa. May magtatanong ulit. "Can we asked kung sino siya? Or can you at least confirm if tama ba yung nasa isip namin?" I smirked. "Who was it?" I asked. "Is it Lauren Young?" I knew it. Sabi ko na eh. Siya yung akala nila. But, no. I just gave them a smile. Didn't say a word and just kept my cool. Seems like, naguguluhan sila. I knew this would be fun. "What happened, Elmo? Why were you jealous nung mga time na yon?" I was brought to the past. Hanggang ngayon nararamdaman ko pa din yung selos. "Masaya naman kame when the relationship started. Sobra. Kahit na ang daming hadlang. Or, ang daming problema. Kaya naman namin eh. Until naging busy ako sa career ko. That was when I transferred as a Kapamilya. Siguro, she felt like wala na akong oras sakanya. Pero, it was nothing like that. Kase, I still find time para magkausap kame. Ako yung guy eh. So, ako yung mas nag-effort." Which are all true. Totoo naman ah. Di niya pwedeng tutulan yan. Hahalikan ko siya. "Na-link siya sa isang particular guy. I felt like, nabalewala ako. Parang gusto kong isigaw, boyfriend here, hello. There are times na magkausap kame, pero, kinukwento niya how funny that guy was. Or how talented he was. Ewan ko. Nagselos na lang ako bigla. Then yun, di na kame nag-usap." Ang sakit. "Feeling ko pa, napalitan na ako sa puso niya. Kase, according sa mga nababasa ko, he can make her happy. Yung sabi ko sa sarili ko dati, napalitan na ako." Sobrang sakit. "Are we talking about Julie Anne San Jose?" That question. That name. Her name. Napatahimik ako. "So, Elmo? This is a confirmation na Julie and Elmo once happened?" A guy from the press asked. Matagal bago ako nakasagot. "Yes." A plain yes to answer them. Nagkaroon ng bulungan. Marami sakanila ang kinilig. Ang iba ay nakangiti. Nung binalik ko yung tingin ko sakanila, parang sobrang satisfied na sila sa nalaman. They asked about the movie and the details kung kelan ang show date and whatnot. After the presscon, I chose to go sa favorite kong cafe. Sakto din naman na it's lunch time. A pasta and a frappe would be great. Bluerange Cafe. I was once told na isa daw sa JuliElmo fan ang nagpatayo non. It is a cozy place and masarap talaga yung mga ino-offer nila. While munching with my tuna pesto, some girl occupied the seat in front of me. That made me whoa. "What are you-" I was hesitant na ituloy nang malaman ko kung sino siya. I was just looking at her. Confused. "So, aware ka naman pala?" She asked. Aware? Aware saan? Saan? Ibubuka ko na sana yung bibig ko para magtanong. Pero, naunahan na naman niya ako. Edi, nakanganga lang ako. "Na wala tayong closure." I remained silent. Hindi ako naka-imik at bigla na lang nag-iwas ng tingin. Kinakabahan kase ako. Bakit siya nandito? Gusto ko siyang tanungin. "Ehem." Tikhim niya and she was able to get my attention. Just like the old times. Pag-angat ko ng tingin, she was intently looking at me. "So? Wala tayong closure?" Tanong niya na may pilyang ngiti. I sip from my drink and look at her. Umiling ako. "Yes. Wala." Simple kong sagot. "Can we talk?" Julie asked. Tumango ako. "Of course." I answered. She smiled. Oh God. Sobrang ganda niya. Paulit-ulit na naman akong na-iinlove. Alam ko naman na after ng pag-uusap na 'to, ako yung talo eh. Kase, hanggang ngayon, umaasa pa ako na magkakaron ulit ng 'kame'. "Do you want to transfer or dito na lang tayo?" "No, Moe. It's fine here." "Okay. Do you want to order something?" "Bottled water na lang, Moe." I quickly get the waiter's attention and na-serve din naman nila agad yung water niya. "Where do we start?" I asked her. Really clueless kung anong magiging ending nito. "Bakit?" "Anong bakit?" Balik kong tanong kay Julie. She looked straight into my eyes. Feeling ko tuloy, she's seeking to see the deepest side of me. "Why'd you stop loving me?" Seryoso siya. Parang may luhang gusto ring kumawala sa mga mata niya. "Julie, I never stop." She gave out a bitter laugh. "Talaga? Ano yun? What happened back there? Nagtrip ka lang? Biglang ayaw mo lang akong pansinin at kausapin?" "I was jealous, okay." I butted in. "Dahil lang you're jealous, bigla ka na lang bumitaw?" A heavy silent. "Ano Elmo-" Nakayuko ako. "Umasa kase ako na ikaw naman yung mag-eeffort for us." I met her gaze, seeing her staring at me. She was caught of guard. "Those times na pinili kong humingi ng space, pinabayaan mo lang ako eh. And there is this guy who took advantage of our situation." "Ben." She whisphered. "Julie, you made me feel unwanted. Alam mo kung ano pa yung mas masakit? Ha?" I am seeing tears in her eyes. Parang gusto na nilang bumagsak. Umiling siya. "Pinaramdam mo sakin na wala na. Wala ng tayo. Na tapos na tayo." A tear fell. "And for all those years na miserable ako. You were so happy. Kasama siya." I looked away. "Julie, pinili mong maging masaya. And that is without me." I feel relieved. That, after years, I was able to finally say this to her. When she felt like na tapos na ako sa sinasabi ko. Nagsalita siya ulit. "Elmo, for weeks, nabalewala yung texts and calls ko sayo. Hindi mo ako sinasagot. Bigla ka na lang naging ganyan." This is the perfect time to laugh bittterly. "Texts and calls? Wow. Big thing, Julie." I continued. "Effort na yun for you? E yung okay lang sakin na nagdecide ka na wag aminin sa mga magulang mo na tayo? Hindi ba points yun sakin? Yung first 2 years natin together na puro lang tayo tago, and I tried to keep up with everyone in your life, texts and phone calls lang katapat non?" "Elmo-" "No, no, Julie. Let me." "Oh. How about all the flowers, candle light dinner, surprises, out of the country trip, text and calls lang talaga? Seryoso?" I sighed. "E yung pinili kita kesa yung family ko? Ano yun? Pang-texts and calls lang?" Masakit pa rin pala talaga. "And nung finally, natanggap na din ako ng Mommy at Daddy mo. If you remember your exact words, sabi mo, 'Ang kulit mo kase baby eh. You never stop fighting. Ayan, payag na sila Papa.' Di ba, isa yun sa pinakamasayang nangyare sa buhay natin?" Ako yung pinakamasayang lalaki sa buong Antipolo nung mga oras na yon. "O baka naman I just assumed? Kase you are way much happy with him." Sobrang hirap niyang sabihin. "Hindi naging kame, Elmo." Sabi niya. "Maglolokohan pa ba tayo, Julie? Okay lang. Magiging okay din ako. Siguro, after this talk, I can finally move on." She's shaking her head. "Hindi talaga naging kame. But, I'd be honest with you. Those times na I was so cold towards you, na parang wala na lang sakin kung anong meron satin, Ben was the reason." "Mas masakit pala marinig no?" Hindi niya pinansin yung sinabi ko. Nagtuloy-tuloy lang siya. "Siguro kase, namiss ko yung feeling ng nililigawan. He was out in the open. There was no normal courtship between us. Ganon pala yung feeling. Naging gusto ko yung ganung feeling." "Pucha naman Julie. The whole time na girlfriend kita, I made you feel like a Princess, di ba? And everyday pa rin kitang nililigawan." "I know." Disappointed siya. Maybe sa sarili niya. Dapat lang. "Hindi mo man lang sinabi sakanya na you have me? Na tayo?" "I told him. Sinabi ko, Elmo. Pero, mapilit siya. Gaya nung pagpilit niya na siya na lang maging leading man ko dun sa music video." "Dahil mapilit siya, ganon na lang yon? Eh. Tangina." "Elmo-" Pigil niya sakin. "Bullshit yon, Julie. Bullshit yon." "When you were not around, he was there. He made me feel alive. I was happy with him." Sige pa, saktan mo pa ako. Natahimik lang ako. "Pero, he was never like you." Hinawakan ng dalawang kamay niya yung kanang kamay ko sa mesa. "It is a human nature to compare, Moe." "Hinahanap-hanap ko yung lalaki na sobrang komportable sakin. Yung walang pakialam kahit mukha na siyang tanga kakahintay sakin sa taping. Yung nakanganga matulog whenever may sleepover siya sa bahay namin kase busy ako sa thesis ko, and just choses to stay with me kase miss niya na yung girlfriend niya." I felt she's sincere. "Namiss ko yung boyfriend ko na, walang hiya-hiyang uutot sa harap ko. Yung tititigan ko siya, pero sasabihin niya lang, 'Walang mabangong utot, baby.' Kase, yun pala talaga yung totoong nakakapagpasaya sakin." She's looking straight to my eyes. "I missed my Elmo. Kaya I never choose Ben." "Bakit di mo ko pinaglaban, Julie?" "Kase, hindi mo rin ako pinaglaban. Pinili mo na lang maging ganon tayo. Nagpatalo ka, Elmo." "The same way na nagpatalo ka, Julie." Sabi ko. "I knew that. And, I am sorry. I felt sorry for myself too. Kase, pinakawalan kita ng ganun-ganon lang." "Mahal mo pa ba ako?" "Hindi naman nawala yun, Elmo. Pero, marami na tayong nasayang na panahon." "This is probably the closure that we both need?" I asked. She nod. "Namiss kita, Julie." "I'm still missing you, Elmo." "I'm already in front of you, miss mo pa rin ako?" Nakangisi lang ako sakanya. "Yes. Kase, hindi ikaw yung Elmo ko. You are no longer comfortable with me and you are not mine." Napatigil ako. "I may not be comfortable when you're around, but, I'm still yours." Kinuha ko yung right hand niya at tinapat sa puso ko. "Mahal ka pa nito, Julie." She gave me a smile. Isa pa yan sa mga namiss ko eh. When I met her gaze, I asked. "Pwede pa ba?" Nginitian niya ako. "Elmo, we just had our closure a minute ago. Finally. Tapos, may ganyan ka?" She said while laughing. "This talk maybe was not that late, kahit 5 years yung lumipas bago tayo nakapag-usap. Pero-" "Pero?" Putol ko sakanya. "Pero, you were 5 days late, Elmo." "What do you mean?" "Ben, again." Parang nahihiya siya na hindi ko maintindihan. "What?" Di ako makapaniwala. After 5 years, epal pa rin siya? "He's courting me again. Pumayag ako." I sighed. "Hindi ko naman alam kase na-" "I will fight for you, Julie." Pigil ko sakanya. She smiled. "I know, I'm never too late, baby. I will win you back." "Wag mo masyadong galingan, Elmo. Baka sagutin kita agad."

"Okay na kaya 'to?" Kausap ko sa sarili ko. I'm in my bedroom. Alone. "Hmm?" Pagsagot ko rin sa sarili ko. Di kaya parang nasisiraan na ako ng bait nito? "Re-read it, Elmo." I convinced myself. "Hi Julie. Good Evening. Do you still use the same number?" I want to send her a direct message via twitter. I think, okay na yun as a starter. "Send the freaking message shy muppet." Pang-aasar ko sa sarili ko. "Kuya?" That was Clara. "Are you calling me? Or, may kailangan ka ba? Naririnig kase kita from my room. Tho, I can't understand you." She smiled. "No, Claws. Sorry at naistorbo kita." I returned her smile. "Alright. Good Night." She left. I am thinking na good sign yon, since it's Claws. Sa lahat ng siblings ko, siya yung unang na-inlove sakanya. "Ang tagal naman niya mag-reply. Nagsend naman right?" Bulong ko. Words fading till I complete the sentence sa pag-iisip na baka hindi ko nga nasend. "Nagsend naman. Ano kayang ginagawa non bakit hindi agad nagreply?" Napatayo ako mula sa kama para magmuni-muni habang hinihintay ang reply niya. I jumped to my bed nang makita kong umilaw yung phone ko. Si Mom. Reminding me of my schedule. "Moe, para kang high school na naghihintay ng reply from your crush that you stalked." Sabi ko sa sarili ko habang napapa-iling. Things that you do to me, Julie. "Diret message from Moe?" Di makapaniwalang tanong ko sa sarili ko. "Bakit naman magme-message yon?" "I don't think it is because he'll greet me happy birthday or to congratulate me for graduating. He probably knew na it is too damn late." Sabi ko. "Ah. So Julie, umasa ka na he'll greet you?" Sabi ng konsensya kong hindi naman kagandahan. Ganern? I slap my cheeks, left and right. Para magising. Baka panaginip lang 'to. "Edi inamin mo rin na lagi siya sa panaginip mo." Aba? Walang hiyang konsensya 'to binubuko ako. Bigla na lang akong napasabunot sa buhok ko. Sa tinagal-tagal, pinapasakit pa rin niya yung ulo ko. Sa isang message, nababaliw ako. "So, Elmo. May ganitong effect ka pa rin pala sakin." I smirked. What would be the reason ng DM niya? Napapa-isip talaga ako. "Hmm?" Thinking of the possible reasons. "Baka it's a virus thingy. Yung automatic message that was sent sa followers niya." Possible. Convinced ko sa sarili ko. "Or baka gusto kang kamustahin. Kase, miss na miss ka na rin niya." Oh my God. Pwede naman di ba? "Umasa ka pa, Julie. Baka he'll ask you some favors lang." Epal na konsensya. "Favor?" Isip ko. Ano nga kayang favor? "I think, gusto niyang i-promote mo yung bago niyang show. Yung Born For You." Luh. "Ang pogi niya don. Sobrang fresh niya. Ang sarap i-hug and i-kiss." Hoy Julie, nababaliw ka na talaga. "Aba teka ang kapal naman niya kung yan yung reason niya to send me a message." Bigla akong napanguso. "Open the freaking message, Julie." After several minutes, nakatitig lang ako sa phone ko. "Aaaaaaaahhhh." Sigaw ko. "Ate? What happenned?" Si Joanna. "Ay wala yun, Joanna. Sorry." "Okay. Good Night, Ate Julie." Things that you do to me, Elmo. "Hindi pa rin siya nagrereply. Hindi pa naman tulog yun eh. Kaya nga saktong after niya mag-tweet ako nagsend ng DM." Julie, I am going crazy. Crazy for you. " Hi Julie. Good Evening. Do you still use the same number?" I read his message. Finally, Julie. My fingers were as if on queue, typed him a reply. "Yes, Moe. Why?" She replied. "Can I call you? I will just discuss to you our itinerary to Europe." He sent me another message. "What?" Napabuga ako sa iniinom kong tubig. Anong sinasabi nitong Elmo na 'to na itinerary? Baliw na ba siya? "What?" I replied. I'm waiting for his reply. Pero, wala. Bigla na lang siyang tumawag. "Hello, Julie?" His voice. I missed it. Napapikit ako. "Hi, Elmo." Her voice. Sobrang namiss ko yun. Pati siya. Napangiti ako. "Ah Julie yung sinasabi ko sa -" She cut me off. "Ano yung sinasabi mo ha, Elmo?" She asked. "Pupunta tayong Europe." I answered. "Pupunta akong Europe." Sagot niya. "Anong-" I didn't let her finish. "Kasama mo ako." I knew that my smile will be evident to my voice. Kase, masaya ako. Naging tahimik sa kabilang linya. "Julie?" "Ye-yes?" Utal niyang sagot. "Excited na ako. Excited ka na ba?" Tanong ko. "Teka nga Elmo. Ano bang pinagsasabi mo ha? Ang alam ko pupunta akong Europe, oo. Pero, ako lang mag-isa." Mahabang sabi niya. "No, Julie. And, I can explain this." She sighed. Feeling ko, hindi talaga siya makapaniwala sa sinasabi ko. "Can you meet me tonight? Maaga pa naman eh." "Sige." She surrendered. "I can go to your house. Then, sa Fairview Terraces na lang tayo. Okay lang?" She didn't answer agad. I think, she's thinking. "No. Wag na tayo sa mall. Dito na lang sa bahay." "Okay. Ikaw masusunod, Julie." "Dapat lang no. Tsaka, baka may makakita satin. Baka maging reason pa ako ng pagkapalpak ng bago mong love team and may new show ka pa." Parang ang bitter niya dun ah. Pero, hayaan ko na nga lang. Baka maging dragonesa bigla. I just answered her with a laugh. "Do you know how to get here?" She asked. I smiled and answered her. "Yes, Julie." "How? Paanong-" "Basta, Julie. Pupunta na ako agad." I quickly got my keys. Nagpaalam lang ako saglit kay Mom. Alam niya na yon. Then, headed to the San Jose's. "Julie, I'm here na. In front of your house." Text ng Mokong. "Bwiset na Elmo 'to. Bigla na lang may pasabog. E kung pasabugin ko kaya yung mukha niya?" Ay wag, sayang. Ang pogi pa naman. "Bakit ang traydor ng konsensya ko?" Napa-iling na lang ako. Elmo Magalona calling ... "Ano 'to? Hindi makapaghintay?" I answered his call. "Julie nan-" Of course, I didn't let him finished. "Ano Magalona? Di makapaghintay? Taeng-tae?" He chuckled. "Hindi naman Julie. Akala ko lang, you were asleep-" "Ito na. Pababa na." Pagsusungit ko. Pero, wag ka. Excited yan makita yung ex niya. Okay konsensya, again? Really? Ex-loveteam-partner. Pagbukas ko nung maliit na gate nakita ko siyang nakatayo sa gilid ng kotse niya. Naka-white na v-neck shirt. Black tokong shorts. Black converse. And a black cap. Converse din. May hawak siyang frapp from Starbucks. Hala. Ang gwapo niya. Natulala ako. Natulala si Julie. Napangiti naman ako. She's wearing a white v-neck shirt and a black sweat pants. Naka-slippers. Yung hair niya nakalugay. Sobrang ganda niya. Natulala din ako. Namiss ko siya. "Ehem." Tikhim niya. "Oh." Gulat ko. "Tara, Elmo. Pasok ka." Pag-aanyaya niya. "Thanks, Julie. For you." Sabay abot ko nung coffee jelly. "Thank you. Where'd you want? Pasok tayo sa sala or dito na lang sa garden?" Pinagmasdan ko yung buong bahay nila. Ang ganda. Simple and eligant. Parang siya. "Ang ganda." Nasabi ko pala ng malakas. Habang nakatingin sakanya. Bigla siyang namula. "I think, dito na lang tayo sa garden." "Okay. Kuha lang ako ng water mo." "Sige. Gusto mo samahan kita?" I asked. "Wag na. Saglit lang ako." "So?" Pagbalik ko sa garden. Inabot ko agad sa kanya yung glass of water. Giving him a questioning look. "Europe?" I asked. Ngumiti lang si Elmo. Nung mukhang naiinis na ako. Bigla siyang nagsalita. "I'll join you. Totoo yun. Here's the flight details." He handed me his cellphone. Totoo nga. Pero paano? Halata sa mukha ko na ang dami kong tanong. Kaya Elmo started talking again and explained. "Alam na nilang lahat 'to. I meant, your parents and my Mom." "Si Papa." Biglang naalala ko. "Nagpresinta pa si Papa na siya na daw mag-aayos ng lahat. Pati pagbook ng flight. Ibig sabihin, it was you?" I asked na parang hindi makapaniwala. Tumango siya. "Yes." "Pero paano?" Nakatulala lang ako. Hindi ko siya matignan. Kase, ang dami kong tanong. Alam kong lahat yon kaya niyang sagutin. Pero, natatakot ako sa kung ano yung isasagot niya. Madaming tutol. Madaming nagsasabing, hindi pwede. He was about to say a word. Pero, nauna ako. "Elmo." Mahina kong sabi. "Anong sabi ng Mom mo?" "How's Janine? You still have her di ba?" "Kakalipat mo lang. Paano yung show mo?" "Yung love team niyo ni Janella? Anong balak mo don?" "Elmo naman eh." Natawa ako. Ang haba ng nguso ni Julie tapos nakakunot ang noo. Ang dami niyang tanong. Hinampas niya ako. I missed this kind of Julie. Yung parang bata. Nginitian ko siya. I hugged her. "Pwede naman kitang i-hug di ba?" Tumango lang siya habang nakayakap ako sakanya. Nung maghiwalay kame. Pinatingin ko siya sa akin. Sa mga mata ko. "First, okay na okay tayo kay Mom. Sobrang love ka non. Siya pa nga nagbigay sa akin ng idea na gawin 'to. My family's in love with you, Julie. They really are." Looking at her. Parang gusto niyang umiyak. "Sobrang mahal ka nila, baby." Lumaki yung mata niya after hearing the last word. "Oh bakit?" Tanong ko. Niyakap niya lang ako bilang sagot. Napangiti naman ako. "They are also proud of you for finishing college." I gave her my sweetest smile. "Janine and I. We're done." Nagulat siya and felt relieve. "She knew naman na I'm in love with you. Yung sa amin, nag-try lang naman kame kase we knew na makakatulong yon sa love team and sa career naming dalawa. So, another problem solved, baby." She gave me a smile. Pero, hindi yun buo. Uminom muna ako ng water then look into her eyes and continue explaining. "Alam mo, baby, feeling ko nga everything's in our favor. Like, I knew na this is our fate. Kase, with my new network, ibang-iba. They seem to finish every episodes first before they air the show. Kumbaga, while it's starting, we are to do the finishing na lang. Ibig sabihin, pwede akong umalis and be on a vacation with you while it's airing, baby." Parang nagtataka siya. "It's unlike sa GMA na they will rush you today to finish a scene kase it will be air din the next day." "Oh. New kapamilya, huh?" Tawa niya. "And as per Janella naman. Okay lang daw sakanya yun. Alam naman niya how much I am in love with you eh. Alam niya na I am leaving to find love. To be in love again. To be with you. To finally find love, with you, baby." "Yung love na akala ko wala na. Baby, I'm sorry if feeling mo iniwan kita sa ere." Ayun na. Naiyak na ako. Si Elmo naman kase eh. "It's not like that naman eh. Na iniwan kita. Hindi yun ganon, baby." He wiped away my tears. As he always did. "It's just that I don't know what to do that time. Hindi ko talaga alam ano dapat kong gawin. Tama ka naman eh, maraming tutol. Maraming hindi sang-ayon sa atin. Pero, hindi kita iniwan since day one. Kasama mo lang ako lagi, baby." Patuloy lang akong nakikinig sakaniya. "The first few months, we can still keep it from everyone else. Pero, habang tumatagal humihirap. But, kinakaya ko. Kinakaya natin. Di ba?" I smiled, remembering those days. "Hanggang sa parang sobrang hirap ng itago. Those times na I can't hold your hand sa harap ng ibang tao, sobrang hirap non for me." "Kaya nga sobrang saya ko na nagagawa nating maging tayo when we're on stage. I was able to made you feel you are loved." "Pero, baby, sorry ha? If feeling mo bigla akong nawala. Siyempre, susunod lang ako sa sinasabi ng management since they gave me a new chance with a different love team. Pero alam mo ba? Kakampi ko non si Papa Jonathan. Siya nagsabi sakin ng dapat kong gawin. Sabi niya pa, if we're meant to be, our fate will bring us together. Sakto naman na kakampi natin si Manong Destiny." "Julie, mahal na mahal kita." Elmo said and gave me a peck on the lips. These tears are because of the happiness that I am feeling. That finally, we can be together. I can't stop hugging him. "I love you too, Elmo." I said after the hug. "I know. Sabi ng mga kanta mo for me." "Wow ha? Conceited?" Sabi ko na nang-aasar. "Di ba para sa akin yung Secret Love Song?" Tanong niya. Lahat naman para sakanya eh. Wala namang iba. I didn't answer. But, I asked him a question. "Yung Born For You, para din naman sakin di ba?" Laban ko pa. "Yes." Mayabang niyang sagot. "Baby? Yung pagpapa-sexy mo ba para sa akin din ba yun?" Hala lagot na. "Bakit di ka makasagot?" Tanong niya ulit. "Eeeh. Ayaw ko naman nun no. Wala lang talaga akong magawa." He smirked. That naughty smirked. "Sobrang naaakit mo ako, baby. Yari ka sakin sa Europe."

"Hello?" His voice. Silence. And some sobs. I missed him. He said, hello, Julie. He said hello. He answered. Are you nuts? Why aren't you saying a word? I asked myself. I'm crying. It felt sureal. He finally answered the phone. He sighed. "Elmo, baby ..." I said. Afraid that he'll hung up. Silence. An awkward one. He sighed. Yes, again. "Julie ..." I cut him off. And, sing. " I've been looking back. On everything, everything we had. Must have been out of my head. To say those things, say those things I said." Singing those lines is a relief. Music talaga gave me hopes. Feeling ko, mas kaya ko na siyang kauspin after nito. "Elmo, it has been years." A sob. "Years simula nung may nagbago." Another sob. "I hope, it is okay to say I'm sorry. Because, I am really sorry." And with that, I am crying. "Sshhh. Don't." He said. "No, Elmo. Kasalanan ko naman talaga eh. Please, hayaan mo na akong gawin 'to. I owe this to you. Baby." I hope, the smile in my voice is evident after saying the word baby. Because, I mean it. Silence. He's ready to listen. I hope, I am as ready as he is. "Elmo, can you hear me? Are you still there?" "Yes." He answered. "Okay." "And Julie, please call me baby. It really felt right." Can I assume na after niyang sabihin yon, kinikilig siya? "Alright, Elmo. Oh, and I mean, baby." It felt real right. "I am having dreams of you and me, baby. Those days that we were so in love. Nung medyo bata pa tayo. Lahat mg memories ko with you, yun yung mga favorites ko." I started. "That one in LA, baby. We are so free. Free to be together. And free to love each other. I missed those days. Those days with you." I think, I'm gonna cry. "Elmo it was wrong na iparamdam ko sayo before that I love you, but you were never in my list of priorities. It was wrong. And, I am sorry." "Julie, I told you before, it's okay." He said. Silence. Yung nakakabingi. "Pero, Julie, bakit? Bakit bigla ka na lang nawala? Bigla mo akong iniwan." He was hurt. His voice was evident. And I am crying. Kase, hindi ko rin alam kung bakit. "Elmo, I don't know. Hindi ko alam." My voice cracked. Nauutal kong sabi. "Hindi naman yata pwedeng ganon lang yon." "I know. Ang alam ko lang dati, nasobrahan ako ng pagseselos. Na, lahat ng nakikita ko sayo is yung mali. That I never see those things that you did for me. Yung lahat ng sacrifices mo. And love." Silence. I think, this is the part na kailangan kong magpatuloy. "Elmo, sabay-sabay lahat eh. Yung school. You know naman kung ano yung condition ni Papa para ipagpatuloy ko yung career ko. And yung sa career ko. You know how important it is to me. Ikaw yung pinaka nakaka-alam how happy I am when I make people happy." I smiled. Remembering all those things na ginawa ko for my career. "Ang dami kong kailangang patunayan, Elmo. Na, kapag sinabi ng management, wala na akong ibang magawa kundi sumunod. Aaminin ko, sa career ko lang umikot ang mundo ko. For quite some time. Nakalimutan kita. Nabalewala ka." I tear fell. He didn't deserve those. "Yung kay Alden, sabi ng management, I should go for it. Matutulungan daw namin ang isa't-isa. To have a name of our own. Para sa fame. Baby, I was blinded. Kase, yun naman talaga yung gusto ko eversince. Yung sumikat. Yung makita ko yung fruit ng lahat ng efforts ko to be in this industry." "I know." Sa lahat ng taong malapit sakin, siya yung pinaka nakaintindi noon. "Sabi nila sakin, ikaw daw Magalona ka na. You don't need to do this and that para makilala. Kase daw, konting galaw mo lang, people will recognize." "Elmo, I was jealous. Jealous of you." Now, I am being honest. "Kase, laging ikaw ang magaling sa mata ng press. Ikaw yung main attraction." "Julie, no." "Oo, Elmo. That was true. Kaya nung maramdaman ko na sobrang proud ng fans natin sa akin, I did everything para mas lalo pa nila akong mahalin. Sobrang I owe everything to them. Kaso pala, hindi ko alam, naiiwan na kita." "Elmo, I'm sorry." I cried. "Umiwas ako sayo. Nilayo ko yung sarili ko. Nasaktan din ako nun, believe it or not." I continued. "Naramdaman ko kase how different our worlds are. It is so much different. Your friends doesn't like me. Hindi daw tayo bagay. Sabi nila, you are way too cool to be with me. Elmo, sobrang sakit non. Bata pa ako non eh. I self pitied." "Julie naman eh. Bakit mo sila pinakinggan. Hindi ba importante sayo yung mga salita na galing sakin?" He was mad at me. "Alam ko, kasalanan ko. Nagpadala ako sa mga narinig ko. Sa emotions ko. And, I know, I should've call before pa. Para sana napag-usapan natin." He sighed in disbelief. Rinig Sa kabilang linya eh. Bigla akong natawa. "Why are you laughing lady? Nakakainis ka ha." He said. Pero, tumawa lang ulit ako. "Baby, nagpaka-cool kid din ako para sayo. Kahit hindi naman bagay sakin maging conyo, I tried." He chuckled. Speaking of conyos. His family are mad at me. "Elmo, yung family mo." Nauutal na naman ako. I did them wrong. I don't know if I can still regain their trust. "You know how I typically say that I am sorry, Elmo. Pero, sobrang sorry talaga kase alam kong nagalit sila sakin. Alam kong sobrang clueless sila bakit bigla na lang akong nag-iba. Lalo kay Clara. I don't answer her calls and texts before. Hanggang sa she send me an email. Sinabi niya don how bad she felt. Feeling niya daw, tinalikuran siya ng best friend niya." Sobra din akong nasaktan na Clara felt that way. With that, again, I'm crying. I'm not sure how long Elmo and I are on the phone, but, the line got cut off. "What's my name? Elmo. Elmo. Elmo." That was his caller ringtone. *Elmo Magalona calling* "Hello." "Baby, Julie, stop crying, okay?" "Galit sila sakin, baby." Sobs. "Nakausap ko isang beses si Kuya Frank. Nagkita kame sa GMA. Biglaan lang. He was honest enough na nagalit din siya sakin. Lalo na daw sina Ate Maxx and Tita Pia. Kase daw, they were thankful before na ako yung pinili mong mahalin pero, I left you hanging. His exact words were, "Julie, iniwan mo siya sa ere nung time na hulog na hulog siya sayo. My brother is deeply in love with you. Real shit." Tapos, sabi niya pa. Ako lang naman daw ang makaka-ayos nito." "Honestly, yes. Ikaw kase yung sinisi nila why I became so cold towards them. Pero, baby, I think naman, if ipapaliwanag mo sakanila, they'll understand. Love na love ka nila di ba?" This kind of comfort from Elmo is what I missed. Still sobbing, I ask. "Elmo, how are you?" Silence. A good one. "I am perfectly fine. If you will ask me what I am feeling right now. Sobrang okay sa pakiramdam that you called." Aww. This guy is sweet. My guy. "But, if you're to ask how I was when you left?" Silence. The guilty one. I felt it. "It felt like I'm dying. Those times that you are not there. I honestly don't know why. Kung bakit mo ko iniwan." "Alam mo Julie, gustong-gusto kitang i-hug nung nagkikita tayo sa rehearsals. It was tough decision nung pumayag akong maging part ng Sunday All Stars. Kase, alam kong iiwasan mo lang ako. But, Arkin made me realize na if I said yes, that will give me opportunities to look after you. Agad-agad, I called Mom and said yes to their offer." "Elmo, I was in deep shit nung bigla na may pa-welcome daw sayo sa show. I'm always at lost when I'm hearing you sing. Lalo na, kapag hindi ako ang kasabay mo na kumanta. Ramdam ko din yung pag-iwas kaya mas naging masakit. Maraming beses that I wanted to talk over. Pero, ang hirap. Kung before, sobrang dami lang nating diferences, that time feeling ko we're million miles apart." "And, I was jealous. Well, I am still jealous." I continued. And this is the most honest line I uttered tonight. "You don't have to." He said. "Elmo, I miss you." "Julie. I miss you too." "I love you, Elmo." Anothet tear fell. But, I guess it was the one that they call, tears of joy. Because, finally, I was able to say those words again. Those words that are for him alone. "Just call me baby again and we're fine."

"Another day passed. Namimiss pa rin kita." It's always been her. Always been Julie. Bakit nga ba kahit ang sakit-sakit na, gusto ko pa rin siya. Mahal ko pa rin siya. I laughed bitterly. "She'll be the death of you, Elmo." At napahilamos na lang ako sa mukha ko. "Julie, Julie, Julie." Sabay bagsak ko sa kama. Tingin sa kisame. Nakikita ko yung maganda niyang mukha. "Am I this crazy?" Ewan ko ba. Simula nung mawala siya sa buhay ko, nagkaganito na ako. I'm no longer the old Elmo that everyone knew. Pati nga ako hindi ko na rin kilala yung sarili ko. Basta ang tanging alam ko lang is, I love her. I love Julie Anne. Katulad ngayon, 15 minutes before 11. She used to call me at this hour. That is when she made sure na tulog na both si Tito Jonathan and si Tita Marivic. "Hello?" "Hi, baby. I missed you." Hearing her voice made my day complete. Ganyan kami araw-araw. What we have before is indeed perfect. Kahit na secret lang yung relationship namin. Well, I understand na hindi pa siya pwedeng pumasok sa isang relationship, na kailangan niya pang unahin yung priorities niya. Which are, her family, her studies and her career. Wow di ba. Wala ako sa list ng priorities ng girlfriend ko, ng babaeng sobrang mahal ko. Noon pa lang, nasasaktan na ako. But, if keeping this as a secret was the only way to be with her, okay lang. Sobrang okay lang. Tatanggapin ko lahat para sakanya. Mahal na mahal ko siya eh. Not until one day. Nagbago siya. Iniwasan niya ako. Sobrang naguluhan ako. Hindi ko alam. Ayokong mawala siya sa akin. I was so hurt na sa rehearsals hindi niya ako pinapansin. Yung parang gusto ko ng mamatay kase, bigla na lang siyang iiwas. I was so clueless. I tried to chase after her. I asked help from our friends. Pero, wala rin. It all come to waste. Pati nga yung mga mutual na kaibigan namin parang iwas sa akin. That was it. Commumication was lost. But, the love I have for her stayed. Hindi nagbago yun. It came to a point na napabayaan ko na yung career ko. Pati mag-aral ayoko na. I'm always at the bar. Tho, I never fuck a girl. I still respect my Julie, kahit pa sinasaktan niya ako ng paulit-ulit. I'm at lost. "Julie Anne San Jose, diamond recording artist." That was the headline. Kilala na siya ng maraming tao. Her songs are all over the radio. She got multiple music videos, and all of it were on top when I'm watching the music channels countdown. Seems like, I'm left with nothing. She finally got a reputation for herself now. Mall tours and out of the country shows. Magazine covers and commercials. Multiple awards and TV shows. Her name has a brand of its own. "And that is all without me." I whisphered. Bitter na kung bitter pero bakit ba bigla na lang siyang nagbago. Ano bang nagawa ko? I am so down. Feeling ko, iniwan ako sa ere. JuliElmo nga di ba? I was so alone when she got everyone. Totoo naman eh. Yung mga fans, she got them. Alam kong she deserves it but I'm fucking clueless why I don't. When I'm reading their tweets, it's as if I did her wrong. Mali na bang mahalin ko siya? Ang sundin ang gusto niya? I've been thru a lot when she left me without a word. Pero, bakit mahal ko pa rin siya? That is probably the ultimate question. That I can't seem to answer. Sa tuwing nakikita ko siya. Gusto ko siyang yakapin. Gusto kong bumalik ulit kame sa dati na kahit patago, masaya kame with each other. Gusto kong iparamdam ulit sakanya na mahal ko siya. Na mahal na mahal ko pa rin siya. And everytime I see her achievements, I can't help it but smile and be proud of my girl. She's still my girl. Kung tutuusin, girlfriend ko pa rin siya, at boyfriend niya pa din ako. Wala naman kaming proper breakup eh. "There is still hope. I can use that." I said, after checking her new Instagram post. Malaki na rin yung pinagbago niya physically. I am certain that she is eating less. Nakakainis na wala akong magawa about it. Samantalang dati, kapag sinabi kong eat up, she'll finish her plate. When Julie's wearing a bit less than the usual, tatawag na agad ako kay Frencheska. We agreed naman na she'll not mention it to Julie na I'm watching over her. Isasagot na lang ni Maqui lagi, "You love her that much talaga no?" I will always agree and our phone conversation will end with "Good bye Dakilang Magalona." I know that my family are not okay with Julie after what happened to us. Akala din kase nila, we're doing just fine tapos biglang ganito. Gusto naman nila si Julie for me eh. Well, nung una talaga hindi. But, when Julie became a good influence, my family accepted her. And that was the happiest day of my life. I always wanted to go back with either years 2011 or 2012. Even some parts of 2013 will do. Or probably, I should win her back instead of just remembering the old times. I am with my train of thoughts when I hear my phone ring. It was so familiar. "You are my dream, you are my hope, you are my love and baby you are my heart. I want you to know and let it show that I'm in love." That was her. That was my girl. That song was written for me. "Julie, baby." I said unconciously. Suddenly, the phone stopped. Hindi kaya nananaginip lang ako? A tear fell. If the two of us we're okay, it will only mean one thing. She will tell me how her day went and will call it a night. "You used to call me on my cell phone Late night when you need my love Call me on my cell phone Late night when you need my love" *Frencheska Farr is calling* "Hello, Maq?" "Ah eh, napindot ko lang Moe. Bye." The call ended just like that. "Something is up. I need to figure this out." I said. When I am about to get up from my bed. That song again. "You are my dream, you are my hope, you are my love and baby you are my heart. I want you to know and let it show that I'm in love." *Baby is calling* "Hello?" I heard her. No, I mean, she's not saying a word but she's crying. "Elmo, baby ..."

"Why is he so matagal?" I'm waiting for his call. Patiently. For a video call. For him. 'Elmo Magalona calling.' "Finally." I said. Finally. "Hey. I miss you." I smiled and nagpa-cute pa sakanya, feeling and looking so in love. "Hi, baby. I miss you too." He's still that Elmo I fell in love with 3 or 4 years ago. Obviously, he's in the living room while I'm lying comfortably in the bed. This is planned. Everything was planned. Maybe, because, this is the last. "I've come up to a more exciting activity, baby." He said. Too much excitement is evident. He gave me a grin and a smirk, all at the same time. "What is it?" I asked. Feeling excited and nervous. I was a liar. I gave in to the fire. I know I should've fought it. At least I'm being honest. Naisip ko na naman. I was the one who asked for it. "Will do scissor, paper, stick and stone." He's too cute not to feel so giddy. "Aah. Bato-bato-pik. Pinaganda mo pa. Oh, tapos? What's the mechanic?" I asked. "As always, too eager, eh?" Elmo, why do you give me so much Christian Grey feels with that. I bit my lower lip. "Stop." He said. I just gave him a look. A questioning look. "You're biting your lip." I get it. And, I wanted to laugh. I know what my lip biting does to him. "Well, anyways." Patuloy niya. "Ayun nga, bato-bato-pik, kung sino ang matalo, will remove anything na suot niya." He instruct. And he was so hot doing that. "All right. I'm in, baby, I'm in." Sagot ko. Nag-ayos na siya. He positioned his iPad, I think on the table. I put mine on the bedside. Did I mentioned how hot he is right now? Oh my golly gosh. He is wearing a white v-neck shirt and a tattered jeans. With his eye glasses on. He is everything that a woman will ask for. My Elmo. First round: I got scissor, and he got the stone. I'm removing my eye glasses. He smirk and gave me a flirtatious smile. Second round: I used the scissor again; and unfortunately, he still got the stone. I'm removing my ponytail. "Can you do better than that, baby?" He asked. "Heh!" Third round: I've gotta use the paper now. And he still used the stone. "What now, baby?" Yabang ko. "Okay, tsamba." He's removing his white v-neck shirt. How is it possible to feel so hot after he does that? Well, ladies and gentlemen, that is Elmo Magalona, my Elmo Magalona. And, that is legal. Napalunok ako. "Kaya pa ba, Julie?" He asked, then, he smirked. I gave in to the fire. I know I should've fought it. At least I'm being honest. Yes, this is Julie Anne. Fourth round: I've got the stone, and he got the stone too. "Okay, next." I said. "No. Not, really." Pigil niya. "We both have to remove something." Whoa. Nagulat ako. "Okay, fine." Laban ko. I removed my shirt; leaving my bra. He removed his jeans; leaving him his boxers. Fifth round: He got the stone, while, I choose to have the scissor. That leave me with my orange bra and panty on. I saw it. Napalunok si Elmo. He can't handle this anymore. He can't handle me anymore. Sixth round: I'm having the paper, he's having the scissor. Whoa. I'm trying to unhook my bra. Elmo, give me a look; but then, he left. Nawala siya sa screen. What the hell. I know I should've fought it. At least I'm being honest. And, I heard it, a knock on the door. It was him. It was Elmo. My Elmo. "I always dreamt to see you with just your orange bra and panty, because you look so damn hot and beautiful." He was saying habang lumalapit siya sakin. "But, I'd be more than glad to unhook this for you." Pinalitan ng maiinit na palad ni Elmo yung bra ko. He is massaging both of my breast in a slow phase. I moaned. I miss this feels. This feels I got from him. One last time. I need to be. The one. Who takes you. Home. This isn't the first time. Me and Elmo. But, we are each other's first. He made me face him. I put his eye glasses aside. And, we're on his bed. On his condo. I moaned his name. And he brings me to heaven. Yet, again. I need this. I need him. Because, this is the last time. Elmo. Elmo still has Janine. He still have her. Still. One last time. I need to be. The one. Who takes you. Home. Nagpahinga lang kami saglit. Nakahiga kami sa kama niya. Nasa kanan siya; nasa kaliwa ako. "I miss you. I miss us." Sabi ni Elmo. That made me miss us as well. I kiss him; hungrily, as if he'll be gone any minute. I'm gonna ride him. I'm on top now. That made him moan "aahhs" and "oohhs"; and he also scream my name -- Julie. I wanted to give him a blow. A first and the last. "No." He said. He is so firm. I asked why. "Just don't." I feel like a failure. I know that I'd fail you. I should've done you better. "Did they give you one before?" I asked; he nod, confirming it. "Why don't you let me?" "I respect you way too much, Julie." I felt his sincerity. But, I am nothing but hurt. I lay down to his bed. Beside him. "Why did you leave me, Elmo? Why did you stop wanting me?" I asked. "I did not, Julie." "What are you saying?" "You are the one who leave, Julie. You are the one who ask me to stop." "No. Elmo, no." I am screaming because he got everything wrong. I started to cry. "Stop crying, baby." He is kissing my tears away. "Elmo, I want you." I need to be the one who takes you home. One more time after that I promise I'd let you go. Elmo is rocking the bed. His hands on the sheet; my hands on his hair. We are making love. Yes, love. This is the best sex ever. And, the last. "Elmo, I'm sorry." "You don't have to say you're sorry." He smiled at me and then kiss me on the lips. "Just say you love me, Julie." Elmo, I do, I love you. But, what is it for? Isn't it too late? "Just say it, baby." "This is the last time, Elmo. I don't want to be hurt anymore." I need to be the one who takes you home. One more time after that I promise I'd let you go. "Julie Anne, mahal na mahal pa rin kita." I was speechless. He always does that. He always made me speechless. "I will choose you, Julie." I need to be. I need to be the one. I need to be the one who takes you; Home. "I love you, Elmo. I love you." One more time. "Julie, I am home with you."

"You have all the chances, Elmo."

"Moe, tara, kain muna tayo." I am trying to get my car key on my pocket when I heard my buddy, John, called. I gave him a smile. I am saying no, kaya dapat ngitian ko siya ng malawak. "John, pare, sorry. I have someth-" "I have something to do. Iba na ngayon Pare. May naghihintay na sa akin sa bahay." He cut me off. Pero, siya na nagpatuloy ng sasabihin ko. Natawa ako. Natawa sila Andy. Natawa silang lahat. Pero, si John, sumeryoso lang ng tingin sa akin. "Magalona, you are a change man. I am proud of you." It was John, talking to me, while patting my shoulder. "Kadiri John, ang seryoso mo." Sigaw ni Makoy. "Proud lang ako dito sa hayup na kaibigan natin na 'to. Yung dating babaero na madalas mag-aya satin para lumandi, a man with balls na." Tawanan na naman. Ngumiti ako. This means a lot. Lalo na kapag galing sa best friend ko. Masarap sa pakiramdam na you are changing for the better. For her. Am I really changing? Or maybe, I'm just in love with her? I'm driving my way to her. To her, where I feel home. "I'm home, baby." Masigla kong bati. Pero, wala siya. Nasaan naman kaya yon? Sabi niya sa text niya kanina, nasa bahay lang siya. Wala sa kusina. Not even in our room. Wala sa banyo. Not inside her music room. Prolly, I know where she is. "Entertainment room." Sigaw ko. Alam mo yung parang sa mga cartoons, yung may matching light bulb pa. Bumalik muna ako sa kwarto namin. Change into shorts and sando. Walking my way to the kitchen, to get her something to munch. A popcorn maybe. "Aye aye, Captain." I said while entering the room. And there she was. Sitting comfortably on the couch. Lumapit ako. I kissed her on the lips. Smack lang pero for 5 seconds. Sobrang namiss ko siya. "Hi, baby." She greeted after our lips parted. "Spongebob again?" "Yes." Tango niya habang naka-pout. "We've watched this for the nth time, baby." Lumungkot ang mukha niya. "You don't want na ba?" I flushed her my sweet smile. "Of course not. Watching this with you feels like brand new." "Aww. Ang sweet. Pakiss nga, baby." Hindi na ako nag-aksaya ng panahon, at hinalikan na siya. "Your lips is the sweetest candy to taste." I said. "Yours is like a chocolate. I can't get enough of it." She said. She is the sweetest of them all and I am really in love with her. Nagsimula na kaming manuod. Nararamdaman kong napapapikit ang mata ko, but I don't want to fall asleep. She's combing my hair with her hands. Lalo akong inaantok. "Moe, gising na. Past 7 na oh." "Elmo, gising na." When I woke up, mukha niya agad yung nakita ko. She will forever be beautiful, and maybe I am just in love with her. "Nakatulog pala ako. Sorry." "Okay lang. Alam ko naman na pagod ka. Galing ka pa sa work." She's too understanding. She's the perfect girl for me, and maybe I am just in love with her. "Are you hungry?" I asked. And as if on cue, kumalam yung sikmura niya. Nagtawanan kame. Her laughing is my comfort zone. "What do you want for dinner?" She never cook. She don't even know how to cook a rice. It's her biggest problem. "Baby, I want some pasta, please." Malambing niyang sabi. When she's like this, kase may kailangan. Lalo akong sobrang naiinlove. "Your wish, is my command." After saying that. I received a kiss on my left cheek. One thing why I love to cook. While doing the pasta, "What if I tattoo your name on my wrist?" I asked out of the blue. Napa-isip siya. She hugged me from the back and check on the noodles. "A sweet gesture, babe." I faced her and walk to the fridge na magkayakap kame. "But, no need to do that. Just to let me know na mahal mo ko kaya mo gagawin yon?" Tumalikod ulit ako. Naka-back hug pa rin siya sakin. Pagkakuha ko nung cheese, humarap ako ulit sakanya, tumango ako, and said, "Yes." "Sweet mo Magalona. Pero, wag na." She's checking on the noodles again. Gutom na talaga eh. "Pagluto mo na lang ako everyday." And, it's my turn to give her that back hug. "Of course, baby." "Thank you." She said and kiss me on the nose. I will always love the way she kiss me on the nose, and maybe, I'm really just in love with her. Eating with her is like a beautiful scene in a romantic movie. She is my happy ever after. She is my one and only. Magliligpit na sana ako nang magsalita siya, "Elmo Moses, I will do the dishes." "Baby, ako na." "Wag nang makulit. Akyat na don." Wala na akong nagawa. Baka magalit si Boss eh. "Okay Mrs. Magalona." "Hoy Elmo!" Sigaw niya pag-akyat sa kwarto. Nagulat ako. May nagawa ba ako. I've been faithful to her. Sobra. Simula nung makilala jo siya, siya lang naman eh. "Ba bakit?" Para siyang natatawa na naiinis. "Anu yan? Bakit level 9 ka na agad? Akala ko ba hindi ka marunong maglaro niyan? Lagi pa nga kitang natatalo kapag magkalaban tayo di ba?" Pasigaw, mabilis and medyo galit niyang sabi. Napakamot ako ng ulo, "Ah eh, ano kase." "Elmo!" Sigaw niya. Kinurot ako at pinaghahampas. She's being childish again. Ganito pa rin siya kahit kasal na kame. This is the Julie that I will be in love with all over again. Yes, Julie. I married Julie. Julie Anne San Jose is now a Magalona. She never changed. Even a bit. Surname niya lang nag-iba. "Baby, tsamba lang yan." "Tsamba mo mukha mo. Wag kang tatabi sakin matulog. Akala mo ha." Hala. "Julie! Sabi sayo eh. Tsamba lang yon. Na-dead na oh." Lumapit ako sa kung nasaan siya, sabay yakap ko sakanya. Nakasimangot siya. She's cute when she's like this. She's cute everyday. Or maybe, I'm just freakin' in love with her. "Baby, tsamba lang talaga yon." "Sus. Kung di ka lang gwapo eh. Dun ka talaga matutulog sa dog house." "I love you, Julie." "I love you too, Elmo. And, I have a gift to you, tomorrow." "Tomorrow pa? Bakit hindi na lang ngayon?" "Kase nga, best feeling, bukas na." She really like surprises. Kaya pati ako, I appreciate its essence na rin. Julie is a surprise that I would love to receive each day. Or maybe, I'm just deeply, madly, truly in love with her. Humiga na akong ng maayos sa kama. "Oh? Anong ginagawa mo?" Nagtaka siya. "Matutulog na. Para makuha ko na agad yung gift ko na galing sayo." She smiled at me at niyakap ako. "Good night, Magalona." "Wake me up, Misis ha." It's been my dream since I met her. Yung ganito, yung matutulog kasama siya. At gigising na kapiling pa rin siya. It's like, starting and ending my everything with her and that is because I am in love with her. "Daddy, gising na." That was Julie's voice ah. "Wake up, daddy." Pero, bakit daddy daw? Pagdilat ko ng mata ko, mukha niya agad ang nakita ko. How is it possible to have your day complete even if you just woke up? It's always possible with Julie. She smiled at me. Tumayo siya. Ang laki ng tiyan. Tapos, naka-maternity dress. Nananaginip yata ako. "Elmo, sabi nila di ba, a husband and a wife can be call a family, if they have a baby on wherever they are na nangungulit at naglalaro?" Nakanganga lang ako at napatango. "Elmo, this is what will I look life for the entire 9 months. Okay lang sayo?" She asked grinning. "Oo." Lutang kong sagot habang nakanganga pa rin. "You're crying." Julie said. "Julie, thank you for waking me up with the best gift."

"Hi, Sir. Good Evening." This little man in front of me greeted with a smile as I open our front door. I didn't say a word. Why would I. He's offering his hand. For a shake. I simply look at his hand and back at him. Napansin niya yung kagaspangan ng ugali ko at binawi na lang ang kamay. "Sir, I'm here to visit your daughter. My name is-" I didn't let him finish. I know him. "I know you. Stop being formal, kid. And, my answer is no. You can go." Matigas kong sabi. "Pero, Sir." He's stopping me from closing our door. He looked so determined. I liked it. But, no. He can't have my daughter. "I said, you may go, kid." Polite ko namang sabi. "Sir, babalik po ako. Hanggang sa maibigay niyo na po ang tiwala niyo sa akin. Salamat po." I simply smiled at him. I passed by the music room. There I saw my princess playing the piano. She's really like her Mom. Napangiti naman ako. Speaking of her Mom. Puntahan ko nga sa kusina. My Queen is at the kitchen. Preparing our dinner. Her hair in a messy bun and she's wearing an apron. She look sexy. And I love her. I hugged her from behind. "Hey." Tumingin siya sa akin at humarap. "Sino yung nasa labas?" She asked while playing with my hair. "The same guy." Lumukot ang mukha ko. "Persistent ha." She smiled. "Impressive." She said a matter of fact. "Impressive my ass." Pagsalungat ko. "Grumpy kid as ever." Natatawa niyang sabi. "I'm not grumpy." "Over-protective monster." Inaasar talaga ako nito eh. "I'm over protective but I'm not a monster." "You are becoming one. Boo." Magsasalita pa dapat ako pero bigla siyang nagsalita habang papalayo sakin, at may kukunin sa fridge. "Akala ko ba you want to be like your dad to you. Yung sobrang cool." Sabi niya habang hinuhugasan yung mga patatas. Magsasalita na naman sana ako pero humirit na naman siya. "Eh as you aged, you are being like my dad. Dahil ba close na kayo masyado? Huh? Daddy Monster?" Tanong niya habang natatawa. Pero, I sensed naman na seryoso siya sa kung anong gusto niyang sabihin. "I was just protecting her. You know that over-sa-luwag-mommy-na-minsan-hindi-na-cool." "What? Ako, hindi cool? Baka ikaw diyan." "You know naman na crush ng anak mo yun." I let her remember. "Alam ko. Alam na alam ko. Kaya nga natatakot ako na one day, magalit na sayo yang prinsesa mo kase sobrang rude mo sa prinsepe niya." Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. "He's not stealing your daughter. Hindi naman niya inaaya ng kasal. Tinatanong ka lang kung pwedeng maging prom date niya si Jaja, umiikot na agad yang puwet mo." "Prom date, to courting stage, to date date." Oh no. Ayaw ko nang ituloy. Hindi ko kaya. Jaja's still my baby. "Over acting na si over-protective monster." "Let's not talk about this over dinner, baby, please." She just give me a grin. Dinner is over. Naging okay naman. The usual. Me, Julie and Jamaica. Yes, I am Elmo Magalona. Kiko and Pia's son, Maxx, Frank, Saab, Arkin and Clara's brother, the rapper, the actor, Julie's loving husband and Jaja's over-protective dad. If you're not getting it right, yes, si Julie ang nakatuluyan ko. Siya naman talaga yung mahal ko. Mahal niya rin ako. Edi nagpakasal kame. We now have, Jaja. Artista pa rin kame. Ako at si Julie. Julie became a household name. Sobrang sikat na sikat yung pangalan niya. Kilala siyang magaling na performer at singer. I'm more than proud of what she achieved. Madami kaming napagdaanan. Sobrang dami. Baka, kaya ganito ako kay Jaja. My father in law didn't give me an easy fight to win his Julie. "Sorry Elmo. Hindi pa pwedeng ligawan ang anak ko. She's too young." Yan yung paumpisa pa lang kame as a tandem. Wala ka pa nga sa starting point, pina-stop ka na eh. Ayan. Ganyan si Daddy Jonathan. Sobrang straight to the point. "Let her finish her school, Elmo." The second time I tried, fail pa rin. Ayaw pa rin niya. "Wag na lang natin ipaalam kay Papa. Mahal din naman kita." That was Julie being brave. We've been inseparable. Sobrang saya ko nun. Kahit patago lang yung relationship namin. Sinuway ni Julie ang mga magulang niya. Pinagtanggol niya ako. Hanggang sa dumating yung maraming changes sa buhay namin. "You can never have my daughter. Ang saktan lang naman siya ang alam mong gawin eh." "Ang kapal ng mukha mo na magpakita pa dito, Elmo. You don't have a place here." "You don't deserve Julie." Tatlong instances. Iba't-ibang pangyayari. Lahat naging masakit. I admit. Nasaktan ko si Julie. Pero, nasaktan din naman ako. May minahal akong iba. Pero, iba siya. Iba si Julie. Si Julie pa rin ang hinahanap-hanap ko. Ng puso ko. Ng isip ko. Nung nabigyan ulit ng pagkakataon ang loveteam namin, di na ako nag-atubili. Niligawan ko ang mga magulang niya. I tried so hard para lang mabalik yung trust nila. Mommy Ivic opted to forgive me. Pero, iba si Dad. Pinahirapan niya ako. There were times, na he's just ignoring me. Sobrang cold ng pakikitungo niya. It came to a point na ako pa yung naging reason ng pag-aaway nilang mag-asawa. I was so guilty that time. Naglakas na lang ako ng loob talaga na kausapin si Daddy na kami lang dalawa. It was never easy. Loving Julie and to fight for her was never easy, but it was the best feeling ever. "Prove yourself again, Magalona." That was indeed the happiest day of my life. "Huy." Di ko namalayan I was daydreaming. Nandito na si Julie sa kwarto. Nang maka-upo na siya sa tabi ko, I held her face at siniil siya ng halik. It was not the first time we kissed but every time I'm doing this with her, it feels like the first time. Always. "I will forever be in love with you, Julie." She smiled at me and motioned me to bed. We've done it. We made love again. I'm combing her hair down, nang magsalita siya. "Let him, Elmo." Nagtaka naman ako. "Let him in, to her life." I get it. This about Jamaica. "Natatakot ako." I confess. She look at me. Tinignan niya ako sa mata. "Baka masaktan lang yung baby ko." Nginitian niya ako. "It's part of falling in love. Being in the same situation, akala ko you'll easily get it." I don't know what she's saying. "Di ba, crush din kita noon?" Crush din ako ni Julie? "Ta-talaga?" Tumango siya at ngumiti ng kinikilig. "Papa knew that kaya sobrang nilalayo niya ako sayo. He didn't tell you that? You don't notice it?" "I don't know that." Sabi ko at kiniliti pa siya sa tagiliran. "So ayun nga, since crush daw kita, baka daw you'll take adavantage of it. Pero you know what? Kaming babae, likas na sa amin ang magpa-kipot. Yung tipong gusto munang makasiguro na gusto din kame ng lalaki bago kame pumasok sa isang relationship." Tumango ako. "Bear this in mind, Daddy, Jamaica is now a lady. She needs to experience things hangga't bata siya." "And, one thing is for sure, mana yun sakin. Kaya, you don't have to worry." Dagdag pa niya. She really is sure with everything she said. Kaya mahal ko 'to eh. "Yun nga kinakatakot ko eh. Mana sayo. Kita mo nga ako, di na makawala sayo." She blushed. Nakita kong namula ang pisngi niya. At nag-init ang tenga, since nakapatong iyon sa dibdib ko. It was a double meaning shiz. Hindi na ako makawala sakaniya, dahil sa sobrang mahal na mahal ko siya. At hindi ako makawala sakaniya literally, dahil nakapasok pa ang akin sakanya. Tawa na lang ako ng tawa nung pinagpapalo niya ako. "Bastos mo. Kadiri ka." Hampas dito, hampas doon. Ang bigat pa naman ng kamay. "Alisin mo na nga yan. Alis. Baboy." Tulak dito, tulak doon. Ang lakas ng babaeng 'to. Pero, mas malakas ang kapit ko. "No. Not gonna happen." Hanggang sa makapatong na ako sa ibabaw niya. I started kissing her at saka ko siya ulit inangkin. Habang ginagawa namin yon, nandon pa rin kame sa kaninang topic. "Seriously, aaahh, Elmo, let him, aaahhh, in." She said while moaning. Alam ko naman na ang anak nina James at Nadine na si John ang tinutukoy niya eh. Double meaning lang ako. Green minded kase. Pervert pagdating kay Julie. "Yes wife, uhhh, I will let him, uhhhhh. In."

"Ouch. Elmo, that's my skin." Oh. "I'm sorry. Hindi ko napansin." She laughed. "Ang cute mo. You're too serious with that." Tinatanggalan ko siya ng buhok sa kili-kili. "Julie, wag kang malikot. Konti na lang oh." Tinitigan niya muna ako saka siya pumikit. She look so divine. Ang ganda niya talaga. I would love to wake up to this everyday. Today is Sunday, and it's raining. "Now I got you in my space, I won't let go of you." Julie is singing me a song. Kinikilig ako. "Tama na yan, Moe. Let's cook na. What do you want for breakfast?" She asked, smiling. We are sitting in the living room's couch. Here is her favorite. This is a personalize one given by her bestfriend, Maqui, on our wedding day. That was exactly 4 weeks from today. And yes, Julie and I, we got married. When you love someone and that someone loves you back, go, get a ring and marry her. "Can I have you for breakfast?" I asked. I'm about to hug her pero umatras siya. "Enough of me, please. You need some energy, okay." She smiled and I mimicked her. "Okay?" Tanong niya habang tumatango. "Yeah. Okay, Misis." Lumapit na siya ulit sakin. She even sitted on my lap. "So? Ano bang gusto mong kainin?" Nag-isip ako. "Hmm?" "Don't you dare tell me na ako ha." She said at may pagtaas pa ng kilay. "Too much confidence, baby." Kiniliti ko siya sa bewang at binigyan ng marahang halik sa labi. "Feeling ko busog na ako." I said. "Bahala ka diyan Elmo." Tumayo na siya at akmang aalis. "I'm just kidding." "Alright. So, what's for breakfast?" "Baby, can you cook champorado today? Sakto oh. It's raining." "I can try." "Can I help?" She nod and guide me to our kitchen. This is my fourth Sunday with her at gustong-gusto kong masanay. It's great that we have our groceries complete. With this rain I don't think we can still go out to buy some stuffs. "Moe, is this enough?" Tinatanya niya yung dami ng bigas. "Baby, that's so konti. Dalawa kaya tayo." Binawasan niya at tumingin pabalik sa akin. "Alam mo, you're so pogi." Hinawakan niya din ang balikat ko. Isa lang ibig sabihin niyan. May punchline 'to. "Bat ang takaw mo?" She's about to go back into the sink pero pinabalik ko siya by hugging her from behind. "Mahal mo naman." She faced me at binatukan ako. "Kaya nga eh. Pasalamat ka, mahal kita." At sabay na kaming naglakad papunta sa sink. Habang hinuhugasan niya yung bigas, nakapatong lang ang ulo ko sa right shoulder niya. I am the luckiest guy to have her as my wife. Winisikan niya ako ng tubig sa mukha. I will forever be in love with the playful kind of Julie. And I mean, forever. "Ang bigat kaya ng ulo mo." Sumimangot ako at nag-pout. "Naglalambing lang naman eh." Umupo ako sa counter. Nakapangalumbaba, naka-pout at nakatingin sakanya. "Aww. Ang baby ko, nagtampo na." She held my face and look at me. "Wag na magtampo. Dali na, lutuin na natin yon." "Kiss mo muna ako." She just stared at me. My lips and I are both waiting. She's teasing me. Aynako. Ako na nga lang ang hahalik. Her lips are the sweetest. I could taste it every second. When the kiss ended, bumalik na siya sa ginagawa niya. Naiihi ako. "Baby, akyat lang ako ha." Sa taas na lang ako iihi para makuha ko na din ang gitara. Going up, napatingin ako dun sa board na naka-hang sa isang pader malapit sa pinto ng kwarto namin. "Napakagwapo mo talaga Elmo Magalona." It was written carelessly by an orange chalk. Halatang nagmamadali. Lalo akong na-inlove sa asawa ko. Pagbaba ko, hindi ko pinahalata. Dahan-dahan lang ang hakbang. I strum the guitar and sing her a song. "You can't go to bed without a cup of tea. And maybe that's the reason that you talk in your sleep. And all those conversations are the secrets that I keep. Though it makes no sense to me." She just stared at me and listen. Oh how I love this girl. "I know you've never loved the sound of your voice on tape. You never want to know how much you weigh. You still have to squeeze into your jeans, but you're perfect to me." Yes. She is perfect to me. "I won't let these little things slip out of my mouth. But if it's true. It's you, it's you they add up to. I'm in love with you. And all these little things." "Julie Anne, I am in love with you." Julie gave me a kiss. It was too sweet. It was full of love. "I love you, baby." If Sundays are all about these sweetness, can I have Sunday, seven times in a week? I've help her with our breakfast. Minutes passed, and it's ready. I arranged our dining table and she placed the champorado on top. Kumain na kame. It may not be the pinakamasarap and the best champorado but it was the sweetest. Siya ang nagligpit ng pinagkainan and I washed the dishes. After doing what I'm doing, dumiretso ako sakanya. Julie's trying to clean her nails. Aha. "Tulungan kita, baby?" "Ha? Sure ka?" Gulat na tanong niya. I wanna laugh at her. But, my heart melted. She was the cutest ever. "Yes, baby." "Aray naman, Elmo." Naku. Nasanggi ko na naman. Nakakatakot. Baka magdugo. Julie's laughing at me the whole time. Kita mo yan, siya na nga 'tong pinagsisilbihin, pinagtatawanan pa ako. Pero okay lang. Seeing Julie laugh is my own happiness. "What color po Ma'am?" She intentionally laugh harder kesa sa tawa niya kanina. "Red po, please. Para di halata yung mga blood dahil sa sugat na ginawa mo." At least she managed to finish her sentence. Pero, tumatawa pa rin after. Ayun, lagpas tuloy lahat sa daliri niya. I tried to give her the best hair braid. Comb her hair and do some knots. She looked pretty but I don't think she'll love what I did. I put her some make up too. Pink blush and lipstick. Eyeliner and mascarra. I didn't let her see her face in the mirror. "Elmo, akala ko ba mahal mo ako?" "Baby, don't doubt it, I love you." "E ano 'tong ginagawa mo sakin? Trip mo ko ha. Sapakin kita eh." "Ayaw kitang mapagod, baby. Kaya nga I'm doing this for you eh." "Talaga lang Elmo ha?" "Yes. Actually, I'm loving you more." I love this day. I love this girl. And I'm done. Napasigaw si Julie. "Bwiset ka Elmo. Anu 'tong ginawa mo sakin?" Tumakbo na ako palabas ng garden. "Elmooooo." Feeling ko hindi niya ako susundan dito. Ayaw non magpa-ulan eh. Nice move, Elmo. "Elmo, not my haaaaiiiirrrr." Inis na siya. At, nagkamali ako. Nandito na siya sa garden. Hinahabol ako. May dalang pamalo. "Julie, baby, teka, ang ganda mo nga oh." "Hahambalusin kita, bwiset ka." She's not even angry for what I did. She just want to be the playful Julie that I will forever love. "Next Sunday ulit, Mrs. Magalona ha?"

"Hey. You ready?" The guy asked. The girl stiffened. Halatang nagulat. Nasa isang dressing room. Sila lang dalawa. "Ahm. Yes, yes. Oo naman." She stutter a bit, but it's fine, emotions not bulgar. The little man smirked. I'm not sure if it's a good sign. "Are you like sure it's okay that you'll do it with me?" He asked. I'm not getting the point why he's asking. Nagtaas ng kilay si babae. It was just for a favor why she's doing this anyways. She look at him. "Of course." All confident. He get it. Hindi naging maganda yung pagtanggap ni babae sa tanong niya. "No .. Ahm, what I meant is okay lang ba talaga sayo to do this, ano, yeah. Ano, with me. Because, it's me. For God's sake, I don't know what I'm saying." Napabuntong-hininga si lalake; medyo natawa si babae. "Okay. Elmo, calm down. It's all fine with me." Sincere niyang sagot. "Julie, sorry." Kung hindi ikaw si Julie, you won't get it. Pero, kung ikaw si Julie, madali mong maiintindihan kung para saan yung sorry. Tawang mapait mula kay babae. Sobrang pakla that you don't want to see that smile ever again. "May dapat pa bang ika-sorry?" She asked. "You know that there is." He said. "Wala." Sagot ni babae. Natahimik si lalake. "Hindi na dapat. Tapos na di ba?" Pagkakataon na ni lalake para tumawa ng mapait. "May natapos ba?" Sagot ni lalake. Natahimik si babae. "Walang natapos. Dahil in the first, walang sinimulan. It was your word, di ba? Sayo galing lahat yan, di ba?" I looked at him. It was probably the unseen Elmo that he said was the deadliest. A death-glare to Julie. "Ano bang pinupunto mo ha?" Naiinis na si babae. "I'm just trying to reach out, pero nagtataray ka. Hindi talaga kita maintindihan." "Reach out? Para saan?" "Para sa atin. Sa ating dalawa." "Sa atin? Wala namang tayo di ba?" "Ano ba Julie? Maglolokohan na lang na ba tayo dito palagi? Ano 'to laro lang sayo? Taguan ng feelings, ganon?" He became frustrated. Ginugulo na niya ang sarili niyang buhok. She was cut off. "Yung mga songs na sinulat mo, di ba para sa akin lahat yon? Ako lahat ang nasa isip mo nung sinusulat mo yon di ba?" His eyes are begging. His eyes are asking her to say yes. That yes, it was him all along. Tumawa si babae. Nakakainsulto. "Ang kapal naman ng mukha mo. Ganon ka na ba kabilib sa sarili mo?" Napahiya si lalake. Hindi yun ang inaasahan niyang sagot. "Edi kung ganon, para kanino?" "You don't have to know." She answered. "Julie, kelan ka magiging honest sa sarili mo?" "Why not ask that to yourself?" "I've been honest to myself all my life." It's Julie's turn to face him. Nagulat siya sa sagot niya. "May honest pala sa sarili niya na hindi niya maamin sa pamilya niya kung sino yung tunay niyang mahal." She sounds so bitter. "Honest ka nga. Nung sinabi mong, ako lang." Tears started to fall from her eyes. "Honest ka nga no? Nung akala ako ayos pa tayo pero bigla mo na lang akong iniwan sa ere kase may iba na." Tumalikod si babae kay lalake. "Kung sa bagay, it was you being honest when you told me that you'll wait for me kahit alam mong matatagalan." Pinunasan niya ang mga luha niya bago siya ulit humarap. "Sobrang honest mo nga. Salamat ha sa pagiging honest ha." In a typical confrontation, the guy will say sorry and would whisper words to his girl to win her back. But, this is not typical. This is a confrontation between almost lovers who broke each other's heart without them knowing. Ramdam ko yung galit ni lalake. "Edi lumabas din." Nagkatinginan sila. "Lumabas din lahat ng galit at inis mo sa akin." Yumuko si babae. Umiiyak. Nagtuloy si lalake. "From the start, I was honest and true to you. I told you that I love you and I wanted to be with you forever. Pero anong ginawa mo? Pinaasa mo ko. Ako naman 'tong si tanga, umasa." "People say, si Julie, macho yan. Sobrang brave niyan para harapin lahat ng challenges sakanya. Aba, sino sila para sabihan ang mga yan? Mali naman sila. Hindi ka talaga nila kilala. Or should we say, nagpapanggap ka lang? Kase alam mo, ikaw ang pinaka-duwag na taong nakilala ko." "Julie alam mo, takot ka sa sarili mo. Takot ka na baka isang araw mawala na lang lahat sayo. Takot ka na baka when you give your everything, bigla na lang may hingin na kapalit." "When are you gonna take risk and be brave?" Julie's crying. Elmo's just looking at her. "Wow naman Elmo. Ang tapang mo eh. E magdesisyon nga na pangsarili mo, hindi mo magawa eh. Lagi kang nakadepende sa pamilya mo. Sa mga kapatid mo. Be a man enough." Tawang nakakainsulto mula kay lalake. "Alam mo, nakakatawa ka. Ano ba yang kinaiinis mo sakin? Yung hindi kita ipinaglaban sa pamilya ko?" "The were circumstances that time Julie. But, I choose to stay with you. Pinili kong ipaglaban ka. Pero ano? Ako lang ba ang lalaban para sa ating dalawa? Nung una kaya ko pa eh. Pero Julie, nakakapagod pala. Hindi yung mahalin ka. Pero nakakapagod umasa." "Elmo, never kong naramdaman na sapat ako para sayo." "Ang sakit naman na marinig yan." "E kase totoo." "You know what, Julie? Ikaw lang eh. Wala kang tiwala sa sarili mo at napakaraming insecurties. How will you appreciate me kung umpisa pa lang nagdududa ka na?" "It was your fault kung bakit ako bumitaw." Umiiyak na rin si Elmo. This is unusual. Sa totoong buhay, konti lang naman talaga ang lalaking umiiyak eh. "Pero, mahal pa rin kita. Mahal na mahal pa rin kita. Julie." Napatingala si Julie kay Elmo. She was shocked when she saw him crying. "Sorry if I was not man enough. I'm sorry if I stay in love with you all this time." I looked at Julie. Tumakbo siya sa kung nasaan si Elmo. She held his face and kissed him on the lips. It was full of pain, hatred and guilt. "Sorry if I made you like this." She said. She gave him another kiss. This time, it was full of love, longing and lust. Nagkalas sila. Sa pelikula or kahit ano mang kwento ng pag-ibig madalas sa halik na natatapos ang lahat. Yung magiging okay na sila after that. But, this is not a typical love story. Hindi pa tapos. Most of the confrontation between ex-lovers don't have a good ending. But, Julie and Elmo, they're almost lovers that they choose not to end the story just like that. Laging may twists. Nakaupo sila sa couch. Confrontation to confession of love. "Loving you isn't enough para magkaroon na tayo ng start." Sabi ni Elmo kay Julie. "I have to be a little more patient, I think?" She nod. "Alam mo Elmo, ikaw talaga si baby." He became a little bit confused. She smiled. "Yung sa first composition ko. Yung sa Baby You Are." "Alam ko." Pagyayabang ni gago. "Aba't-" Hahampasin sana siya ni Julie pero napigil niya yon. He interwined his fingers to hers. "Basta, Julie, we'll start from scratch ha. Manliligaw ako ulit. And this one would be official." She nod looking at their hands. "Loving you means I should trust you as well." She gave him a smile. "Sana next time, yung mga compositions mo, hindi na pang-brokenhearted." Nagtatawanan na sila. They need this. Para hindi sila magkailangan. Babalik na kase sila. Yung original. Yung kung saan naging parte ka. Yung JuliElmo. Yung matibay ang samahan. "Rehearse na tayo?" Elmo asked. Yun naman kase talaga pinunta nila dito. Para sa 26th, ready na sila, yung tipong walang nag-iba. Magpapakita na nga ako. "Ready na kayo?" Tanong ko. "Direk Rico?"

"Oh my God, Elmoooo." I heard my girl crush scream. She's in pain. "Julie, Julie, push. Ayan na si baby." The guy said. I'm at the delivery room with the two. I am to witness the fourth part of the JuliElmo love story. Julie and Elmo and the art of being a parent. The guy is like his dad. He wanted everything to be documented. That's why I'm here. To captured everything. Kung paano sumigaw si Julie. Kung paano sabunutan ni Julie si Elmo dahil sa sakit. Kung paano mamutla si Elmo sa sobrang kaba. I'm laughing at the sceen. But, nevertheless, I'm happy. A new Magalona will be born. A new apple of the eye will be joining the Magalona clan. "Elmoooo. Aray ko." Iyak ni Julie. Natatawa ako na excited at the same time. "Ayan na, ayan na, baby. He's here na Mommy. Konti pa, Mommy." He's holding her hand. "I love you Julie. You can do it, Mommy." Elmo is the sweetest amongst us. "Aaaaah." Julie. And finally, at 4:30 in the afternoon, John Earl Magalona arrived. Julie's smile is way too priceless but Elmo is much happier seeing his own kid. "Thank you, Mommy. I love you." He kissed her on the lips. "Pahinga ka muna. Bigay ko muna si baby sa nurse." "I love you too, Daddy." Lumabas muna kame. Bumaba sa canteen, para bumili ng kape. Sobrang saya niya. You can't sense the stress na inabot niya before his baby arrived. Hindi mawala yung ngiti niya. Inakbayan niya ako. "Thank you, Barq." "Huh? Thank you?" "For being the supportive brother ever." I nod. "That's nothing, Kuya." Nasa tapat na kami ng room na pinaglipatan kay Ate Julie. "You know naman yung pinagdaanan namin ni Julie di ba before maging okay ang lahat." He gave me a weak smile. Pero, napalitan naman agad yun ng totoong ngiti. I wanted to be like my Kuya Elmo. He fight for his love. He go through everything para sakanila ni Ate Julie. It was never easy. Julie's family doesn't want her to be associated to a showbiz guy. Our family wanted other girl for Elmo. Their lovestory's never easy. It was never easy. At the age of 24, umalis silang dalawa. Nagising ako ng bandang alas-kwatro ng umaga. Saw Elmo sneaking out. I intented not to interfere. Baka masira ko lang ang plano niya. Kunwari, tulog ako. Walang nakita. I send him a text message. To: Kuya Elmo Whatever it is, I'm with you. Nakatulog ako not knowing na he replied. Nabasa ko na yon, umaga na. Malamang nasa plane na sila to LA. "Thanks, Barq. Vacation lang 'to, we'll be back in a week or 2." Walang may alam non na magkasama sila. Ako lang. Hindi sila nagpaparamdam the whole time ng stay nila sa LA. People also didn't realize na magkasama sila. Wala naman kasing may alam that they're okay. Na sila palang dalawa. Tinago nila. Ang alam ko, Julie's family knew na nasa LA siya pero hindi nila alam na si Elmo ang kasama. Muntik pa akong mahuli ni Mom non na kausap sila via video call. "Get a room, you two. Stop kissing in front of me." Tumawa lang sila. Tawang may halong pagmamahal. They were the happiest at that time. They are so in love. "Selos ka lang eh." Elmo said. "Selos?" Julie asked. Naku. Mukhang ibubuking na ako ng magaling kong kapatid ah. "Hey, hey. Don't you dare tell her." My voice's louder than normal. "Barq. Any problem?" Mom asked. Getting my attention. "Ahh, ehh. Nothing Mom, may kausap lang ako. I'll go to my room." She just nod and I excuse myself. "Elmoooh. Arkin's there." Julie and her not so familiar voice. What the fuck. They're making out. He's been kissing her in her full mouth. My brother is a maniac. He's fucking gross. Julie on the other hand is responding wholeheartedly. Oh my God. It's hot. One hot sceen. Oh la la. "Hey, hey. Kadiri kayong dalawa." Getting their attention. Naghahalikan pa rin. And Julie's moaning. Shit. "Bye, Barq, aaah." And the video call ended. "Hoy. Arkin. Nakikinig ka ba?" Oh gosh. I'm day dreaming. What the fuck. Iniisip ko kase na ano kaya kung ako ang nasa lugar ni Kuya Elmo. Oh. Heaven. "Ha? Ano ba yun?" "Wala. Sabi ko, I'm too blessed to have Julie no?" I nod. Well, totoo naman eh. Julie's the right girl for Elmo. She brings out the best in him. He became a man and the matured one for her. "Swerte rin siya sayo, Kuya." Tumingin sa akin si Kuya. Seryoso. "I may not tell you this before. Pero, proud ako sayo. Idol nga kita eh." He gave me a questioning look. "Real talk, Kuya. Nice job for fighting for your love and pursuing Ate Julie." "Mahal ko siya, Barq. Mahal na mahal ko si Julie." That was the most sincere line that I ever heard from him. My brother is too in love. "Julie made me the man that I am right now." Tumingin siya sa pintuan ng hospital room ni Ate Julie. "I will never regret loving her and choosing her. Everyone might be against us pero nung pinaglaban namin ang isa't-isa, yun yung pinakamasarap na feeling, Barq." "Salamat ha." Nakatingin siya sa akin at ginulo ang buhok ko. Bago pa ako magsalita naawat na niya ako. "Simula umpisa kakampi na kita. When everyone's against nandiyan ka para sa akin, para sa amin." Hindi ko na lang siguro aaminin sakanya pero na-inlove ako sa love story na meron silang dalawa ni Ate Julie. "Wala yon. Alam ko kasing she will make you a better man and you'll be at your best with her love. Worth it naman lahat di ba?" Nginitian niya ulit ako. "Nung narinig ko yung iyak ni Early kanina. Sobrang saya ko Barq. Nawala lahat ng takot at alinlangan ko. Tatay na ako, Barq. Sobrang nakaka-proud sa pakiramdam." "Tatay na ako ng anak namin ni Julie." Hours had passed. The Magalona's and the San Jose's came. The first part might be hard for them pero pasasaan pa't matatanggap din naman nila. Love is the most important thing in the world and acceptance is a part of it. "We have the same chubby cheeks, baby." Romae. "Early's too cute." Clara. "I'm a Tita na." Jac. "Baby Early, Tita Joanna loves you." Joanna. "I'll be his Ninang, okay?" Maxx. "Moe, he's pretty handsome, mana kay Julie." Mommy Pia. "Matangos ang ilong, Julie. Buti nakuha kay Elmo." Tita Marivic. "Santi will have a new playmate na." Saab. "I'll teach him yung mga move sa girls." Frank. "Thank you Moe for bringing Early in the world and for loving my Princess." Tito Jonathan. This has been the start of the fourth chapter of the JuliElmo lovestory. Having Early around. "Everything that I'll do would be for my son and Julie."

"I’d be the first to greet you again."

"Don't you dare touch me, Elmo." The girl said. Full of emotions. "Ju ..." He was cut off. "Don't even say my name, Elmo." She's mad. She's fuming. She's hurt. "Sorry. Please. I'm really sorry." She let him finish and give him a sarcastic laugh. "Is that it? Your done? Tapos ka na?" She's giving him a flaming look. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry." The guy said. "Sorry again? Is that everything that you can say? Ano? Pagtapos mong mag-sorry, okay na lahat? I'll be the Julie na tanga at hahabol sayo?" Tumawa si babae. Mapait. "Not in your dreams, Elmo." Elmo's about to speak but Julie started crying. One tear fell. Hindi alam ni Elmo ang gagawin. He just don't want to see her girl cry. "Where were you when I needed someone when I was so down? Yung kahit isang yakap mo lang sana, I'd be fine. Pero nasaan ka? Nasa babae mo di ba?" Pinunasan ni Julie ang mga luha niya. "Nung mga panahon na kailangan kita, naramdaman ba kita? Well, oo nga pala. Yung mga flowers na pinapadala mo almost everyday. Akala ko dati, that makes you a perfect boyfriend." Wala na siyang luha. All her emotions is within her eyes. Nasasaktan siya. "Yung mga linya mo dati na despite of your busy schedule you still finds time to spend it with me. Alam mo ba, I was the ever so proud girlfriend at pinagmalaki kita. Sa family ko, sa workmates ko, at lalo na sa friends ko. There were all jealous of me, may perfect boyfriend daw ako." She chuckled. "At ikaw daw yon, Elmo Magalona." Dinuro niya si Elmo. "Pero ang hindi nila alam. You are the worst person ever. You're too good to be true." She paused. Her eyes, breaming with tears. "Mayabang ka. Mataas ang pride mo. Napakalaki ng ego mo. Selfish ka." Tumalikod si Julie. "Tatalikod na lang ako, Elmo. Hindi kita kayang tignan. Sobrang sakit eh." Elmo look like he's hurting too. "Ang masakit pa, ako yung una. Yung una diyan sa puso mo. Sabi nila di ba, when a man falls in love with another woman kahit he's still in a relationship, mas mahal niya yung pangalawa. Kase daw hindi naman siya magkakagusto dun sa pangalawa kung he's secured at mahal niya talaga yung una." "Julie, ikaw ang mahal ko." Elmo said. Doon lalong nainis si Julie. She faced him. "Wag Elmo. Stop saying those lies." "Pero, yan yung totoo." Julie laughed bitterly. "Tangina mo. Ano yun, libog lang nararamdaman mo sakanya? After kong makitang nakapatong siya sayo? Libog lang ba yon? Kahit na you're screaming your own happiness. Libog lang yon? Wow ha. Sarap na sarap ka pa nga Elmo di ba?" Nakayuko lang si Elmo. "Tanga ba ako para gaguhin mo ng paulit-ulit?" Umiiyak na si Julie. Tumalikod na siya kay Elmo. Niyakap niya si Julie, patalikod. "Julie, ikaw lang. Nadala lang ako. Sobrang nirerespeto lang kita. Alam kong ayaw mo pang gawin natin yon." "Julie, lalaki lang ako." Kumalas si Julie sa yakap. Sinampal niya si Elmo. Pinagpapalo. "Cut." Sigaw ng direktor. Napangiti ako. Nakatingin lang ako dun sa dalawang tao. Elmo handed Julie a handkerchief. Nagpunas si Julie ng luha. "Baby, let me." Oh my gosh. Kinilig ako. Pinunasan ni lalaki ang mga luha ni babae. He's combing her hair. He held her hand and umupo na sa isang tabi. Gaya ng dati. Malapit sa amin ng direktor. Busy pa si Direk. "That was heavy." The girl said. "Yeah, I know. I'll get you water. Give me a minute." The boy offered. Malaki na rin ang nagbago sakanila. Ilang taon na ba ang lumipas? Sinundan ko ng tingin si lalaki. Si Elmo. Yung lalaking yan. Sinaktan ako niyan eh. Yung parang he never cares about my feelings dati. Pero okay na yun, focus na ako sa ngayon. Si babae naman. Nakaupo lang. Si Julie. Yung babaeng 'to. Kung meron akong ayaw sakanya, natatakpan yon ng mga gusto ko sakanya. Even before. Julie and Elmo. Babalik rin pala talaga sila. Maraming naghintay. Kasama ako. "Baby, your water oh." "Thank you." He gave her a peck. Kinikilig ako. Punyetah. Mas kilig talaga kapag si boy ang nag-eeffort. Bumalik sila na may dalang liwanag. Umakbay si lalaki kay babae. Hinilig ni babae ang ulo niya sa balikat ni lalaki. Yung kilig ko, hindi niyo maiintindihan. Shet. Busy pa rin si Direk. "Baby, I can't wait for the scene na ipapakita how sweet we are. Yung sa flashback. Makaka-chansing ako non." Hinampas ni babae si lalaki sa dibdib. Nothing's change. "Pero Elmo, hindi ka ba nagtataka bakit Elmo at Julie din ang name ng character natin?" The guy didn't respond. "Elmo?" The girl keeps on getting his attention. "Hoy!" Deadma pa rin. "Elmo, isa." She yelled. "Anong tawag mo sa akin?" Elmo asked. "Elmo." He kissed Julie. "What was that for?" "You calling me by my name, not baby. I told you to call me baby di ba?" Aww. Shet. Ang sweet ng Mokong na hayup na 'to. "Oo na po, baby." Boom panis. Ayun. Nagkwentuhan lang sila. Ang sweet nila mga friends. Bakit ganito. Yung kilig ko bumalik sa 2012. Mga 5 times na ganon. "Ehem, ehem." May umuubo. Yung literal para makuha ang atensyon ng isang tao. Grabe sina Julie at Elmo, hindi matinag. "Ehem ulit, ehem, ehem." Magkayakap pa rin sila. Haneps. Ako nakatingin lang sakanila. "Aray." May bumatok sa akin. Ayy. Si Direk. "Hindi ka maistorbo diyan ah?" "Omg, omg. Kinikilig ako. Pakshet. Bakit ganyan silang dalawa? Ganyan ba talaga sila? Sasama na ako lagi sa shooting." Naka-tanga lang saakin si Direk. "Where is my classy writer slash producer?" I was taken aback. Graduate na nga pala ako. Matagal na. Writer at producer na din. Natahimik ako sa circulation dati kase bumalik ako sa pag-aaral habang nagta-trabaho. Just to fulfill my dreams. This fangirling is crazy. I should act right. And with class. That happens to be my future. Fangirling with class. Nagtawanan kame. "Anyways, I'll introduce you to them." Oh. My. God. This. Is. It. "Julie, Elmo. Come here." The director said. Tayo naman sila. Lapit agad. Direktor yan eh. "Did you know her?" The director asked. "She's familiar." Elmo said. "I know her. Wait." Julie paused. "Marse?" Natawa ako. Pakshet na Julie 'to. Bigla akong nahiya tuloy. "Well, anyways, this is Charmaine Doble, our writer and the co-producer of this film." "Kaya ba Julie at Elmo ang name ng character namin dito?" Julie asked. Being the normal her na may pakialam sa lahat. Si Elmo? Nganga lang. "Oo, shunga. Kase, kwento niyo talaga yan. Dinagdagan at binawasan ko lang."

"Yes. It's a yes, Elmo." I heard her say. What does she mean? She probably notice my what-are-you-saying-face. So, she repeats, "I said it's a yes, Elmo." A smile form into her face. She is perfect, good Lord. "You mean? Yes? As in yes?" I think, I get it. She nod and smile at me. "Oh my God." Niyakap ko siya at biglang inangat. "Yes, yes, yes." It felt surreal. Tulad nung mga nakikita ko sa movie at nababasa ko sa libro. "Put me down, Elmo." She said. I did what I was told. "Pero, wait. Di ba yung sa mga movies, kapag sinagot na nung babae yung lalaki, they have to kiss?" Namula siya. She's so cute. Nasa isang park kame malapit sa bahay nila. Maraming bata ang nagtatakbuhan. Naririnig ko silang nagtatawanan. Everyone seems happy. Feeling ko pa nga masaya sila para sa amin. Lalo na sa akin. First time kong magka-girlfriend; yung manligaw first time ko rin. I don't know how to. But being a good reader saves me. Inasa ko ang lahat sa libro, sa blogs at sa experience ng mga kakilala ko. Isang bagay lang kase ang sigurado ko, na hindi ko na kailangan ng libro para makumbinse ang sarili ko. Yun ay ang pagiging sigurado na mahal ko siya, mahal ko si Julie. Mahal na mahal ko si Julie. "I love you, Julie." Napatingin ako sa mga mata niya. Hanggang sa hindi ko na namalayan na I am looking directly to her lips. I wanted to kiss her. It'll be both our first. Natatakot ako na baka magkamali ako, pero, bahala na. Nilapit ko ang agwat namin. Nakatingin ako sa mga mata niya. Then suddenly, I felt her lips to mine. Ang sarap sa feeling. Mas masarap 'to kesa sa sinasabi nila sa libro na yung lips daw ng mahal mo, parang cherry pag nahalikan mo na. Napapikit si Julie. Pumikit na din ako. Hindi ko alam kung paano humalik, first time ko 'to. Si Julie din eh. Mga 15 seconds na pero hindi pa rin gumagalaw ang mga lips namin. Magkalapat lang. Pero masarap, masarap talaga. Napadilat kame ng sabay. Lumayo siya at ngumiti. "Tama na ba yon? Is that a real kiss?" She asked. I don't know. First time ko rin 'to. Nagkibit-balikat ako. "I'm not sure but it felt right. I don't care if we did it right or what, basta ang alam ko sobrang saya ko." I give her a smile. "And dahil yon sayo." Inakbayan ko siya. "Tara? Uwi na tayo?" Aya ko sakanya. She nod. Nagsimula na kaming maglakad at umalis sa park. "Ahm Julie?" "Yes, Elmo?" "Di ba pag magboyfriend-girlfriend na may tawagan?" "Ye..yes?" Hindi niya siguradong sagot. "Why not, honey?" Natawa siya. "Ang pangit. Parang pangmatanda." "Oo nga no? We're what, 16? Tapos honey?" "Sweetheart?" I asked, but she didn't agree. "Pangga?" Natatawa niyang suggestion. "Seriously, Julie?" "I was just joking, Moe. Sobrang seryoso mo naman." "Love na lang kaya? Love naman kita eh." Banat ko sakanya sabay kabig sa bewang niya. Namula na naman siya. Ganyan ba talaga kiligin ang mga babae? Ako kaya? Baka kanina, nagbu-blush din ako ah? Nakakahiya. "Ayoko non, baby." Sabi niya. Napangiti ako. "Baby." Pwede. Yun na lang, yun na lang. "Baby na lang tawagan natin, ikaw naman ang baby ko eh. At ang magiging mommy ng babies ko." Double blush. Sobra na yung pagka-red ng mukha ni Julie. "Elmo naman eh." Palo niya sa akin sa balikat. "Totoo naman yon, baby. Pero sige na, hindi ko na uulitin." "I love you, Elmo." Out of nowhere na sabi ni Julie. "And there, you're blushing again." She said. Sabi ko na eh, namumula din ako. "That's your effect on me. I love you too, baby." I hold her hand. That's the first and definitely not the last. After a week, pinakilala ko si Julie sa family ko. They invited her for lunch. They get along. Family ko saka si Julie. This is the 2nd best day of my life. This is the first and will definitely be not the last. Umuwi din agad si Julie. Hinahanap na siya sakanila eh. "She's pretty and nice." That was Maxx. "I like her. She loves music as much as I do." Saab said. "She likes me Kuya, she said I'm beautiful. I think I love her." My favorite baby, Clara. "Nice catch, bro. Good taste." Frank said. "Elmo, she's jolly and I like her. She's sophisticated and classy. One more lunch with the family, I think I'd love her." Yung kaba ko after sabihin ni Mom yun. Ang saya ng feeling. "I have a crush on her. Aagawin ko siya sayo." That was Arkin, binatukan ko nga. A week after, Julie decided na ipakilala na din ako sa family niya. We'll have dinner sa house nila. First time kong kabahan ng ganito. Naiihi ako. "Baby, teka lang. Naiihi ako eh." Tawa ng tawa si Julie. Kainis 'tong babaeng 'to. Pinagtatawanan pa ako. "Baby, wag ka kasing masyadong kabahan." She hold my hand and give me a peck. That was the first. Yung si Julie ang humalik sa akin. I smiled. Tapos biglang nawala yung kaba ko. "Hi, Elmo." Bati ng daddy niya. "Hi, Sir. Good Evening po." Formal kong sagot. Natawa sila. Sadyang masayahin ba talaga ang pamilya ni Julie or binubully nila ako? "Wag kang masyadong formal, Elmo." Her mom said. "Sorry po, Ma'am kinakabahan lang po ako." "Drop the Ma'am and Sir, soldier. Tawagin mo kaming Tito at Tita. If we don't like you, hindi ka namin i-invite mag-dinner dito sa bahay." Everything went smooth. Went well. The day after, we have school. First time pumayag ni Julie na sunduin ko siya at sabay na kaming pumasok. Masaya pala talaga yung alam mo sa sarili mo na may nagmamahal sayo. Yung secured ka na ikaw lang. Sobrang sarap at saya sa pakiramdam. "Hi, Julie." "Hi, Tony." Binati siya nung lalaking maangas. As if wala ako dito ah. Magkahawak pa ang kamay namin habang naglalakad sa hallway ng school. Parang wala lang ako ah. "Ang ganda mo talaga, Julie." "Salamat, Kuya Errol." And the saga continues. Hanggang sa makarating na kame sa loob ng classroom. Nakasimangot lang ako. Ayun, si Julie, nakikipagkulitan sa mga classmates namin. Ako, nandito lang sa upuan ko. Nakamasid, nakasimangot, nakakunot ang noo. Nagseselos ba ako? Bakit ang insensitive naman ni Julie para sa akin at sa feelings ko? Parang mas masakit pa 'to kesa nung tinuli ako ah? "Hey." Bati sa akin ni Julie. Hindi ko siya pinansin. Sinusuyo niya ako. Pero, wala pa rin. Hanggang sa parang nagalit na din siya at hindi ako pinansin. Maling-mali 'to. Nakakainis naman eh. Ito ba yung sinasabi nilang lover's quarrel? Di naman pala masarap sa feeling. Uwian na. Binitbit ko yung mga libro niya. Kinuha ko na rin yung bag niya. I'm still the boyfriend, okay. Pilit niyang binabawa yung gamit niya sa akin. "Ano ba, Elmo." Galit na tono niyang sabi. "Tara na. Uwi na tayo. Ihahatid na kita." Nasa classroom pa rin kame. Konti na lang kame sa loob. "I can manage." "No. Ihahatid kita. Sabay tayong uuwi." Emotionless kong sagot. "Julie, ano? Una na ba kame?" Tanong ni Marie. Bestfriend ni Julie. "Sige Marie. Ako na bahala sa kaibigan niyo." "No, wait. Marie." I hold her hand. Her right hand. Mahigpit para hindi siya makawala. "Elmo, it's my birthday today. Sunod na lang kayo sa bahay, mamaya." Marie said. Naka-alis na sila Marie. Kaming dalawa na lang. Napa-upo siya at sinapo ng kamay niya na binawi sa pagkakahawak ko ang ulo niya. Parang iiyak na siya. "Ano bang problema mo ha? Elmo naman eh." "Wala. Tara na. Uwi na tayo." Malamig kong sabi. She grab her things at akmang aalis na. Pinigilan ko siya. Hinawakan ko sa braso. "Let go of me." Pilit siyang kumakalas. Kinulong ko siya sa mga bisig ko. I gave her a hug. "Nagseselos ako. Oo, nagseselos ako." I release her from my embrace. Halatang nagulat siya. "First time ko yun maramdaman. Yung parang hindi ako importante sa taong sobrang importante para sa akin. Sorry, Julie." Tumawa siya. Yung malakas. Halakhak. "I love you, baby. I love you, I love you, I love you." And then, she give me a peck. Oh my God. Bakit ganon? Yung insecurities ko bigla na lang lahat nawala? She explains to me na kaibigan lang ang tingin niya sa mga lalaking nakapaligid sakanya. Bigla kong napagtanto na it is one of the reason why I fell in love with her. Yung pagiging close niya sa guys and being one of them sometimes. She even give me the assurance na ako lang talaga. Nakakabading pero ang saya-saya ko. Yung kilig ko ang dami. From then on, Julie never fails to send me sticky notes that have all those ka-cheesy-han. "Elmo, bakit ang pogi mo?" I read it when I flip the page of my Math book nung sinoli niya na sa akin. "Baby, I love you kahit napaka-seloso mo." It was written on the back cover of my notebook. "Magalona, lumayo-layo ka sa babaeng mukhang butiki na yan o kakalbuhin kita? PS, I love you." This made me laugh. Selosa din eh. Maraming bagay kaming pinagsaluhan sa piling ng isa't-isa. May masaya, malungkot. Iba't-iba. It felt right, because it was Julie. It's always been her. "Moe, I have to go, may practice pa kame nila Alden." She said after the class. College na kame. Same University. We're that clingy, I know. "Hintayin na kita, baby. I've nothing to do naman." "No need na. Medyo mahaba yung practice namin ngayon." Hindi na ganon ka-sweet si Julie sa akin. Pero, sabi nga niya, ako lang eh. Kaya maniniwala ako. Alden. He became Julie's friend when we enter college. Pinagselosan ko na siya ng maraming beses. Naging dahilan na siya mg away namin. Yung matinding away, yung muntik na kaming maghiwalay. Julie and Alden won. Mr. And Ms. University. I am too proud for my girl. Hindi ko naman akalain na mas magiging close pa sila. "Elmo, Alden invited for a dinner. That's after class. Una ka ng umuwi." It seems like nababaliwala ako. Buti na lang, Lauren is always here. She accompanies me everytime hindi ko mapigil si Julie na samahan si Alden. We got to the mall. Nag-dinner lang din kame ni Lauren. Nag-aaya pa nga siyang mag-movie eh, umayaw na lang ako. Baka nasa bahay na nila si Julie. Bibisitahin ko siya. Sa parking, may dalawang nag-uusap. Bakit, kinakabahan ako? Pamilyar yung boses eh. I don't know anong meron sa akin pero sinilip ko sila. "I love you too, Alden." "Pero, paano si Elmo, Julie?" "Makikipaghiwalay ako sakanya. Basta ba, ako lang ha?" Malanding sagot niya. Napa-awang ang bibig ko. Naghahalikan sila. Nakita ko si Julie na nakangiti habang ginagawa nila yon. Sobrang sakit. Naghiwalay kame. Hindi kame naging magkaibigan. Galit ako. I'm always crying myself to sleep. Parang nasira ang buhay ko. Lagi akong bagsak sa exam. Paano, lagi ko siyang nakikita. Sobrang unfair naman oh. Siya masaya, ako hindi. But, not until Lauren happen. I never court her. Yung parang, bigla na lang. Bigla na lang na mahal ko na pala siya. She's the best buddy ever. Hindi gusto ng pamilya ko si Lauren. Galit nga sila sa akin eh. Bakit ko daw pinagpalit si Julie sakanya. Kung alam lang nila. Pero, I won't let them know kung ano talaga ang nangyari. Kapag magkasama kami ni Lauren parang laging may matang nakamasid. Hindi ko na lang pinapansin. "Hon, anong gusto mo?" Lauren asked. Nandito kame sa Mcdo, malapit sa school, taking our lunch. "Kung ano na lang yung sayo, hon." Naging masaya kami ni Lauren. Habang si Julie, she's being miserable. Nakarating sa akin yung balita na hindi niya daw pinagbigyan si Alden na kunin ang virginity niya kaya ayon, hindi na girlfriend ang turing sakanya. "Buti nga." Sabi ng isip ko. "Kawawa naman siya." Sabi ng puso ko. Sila pa rin ni Alden. Pero, alam naman niyang ginagawa na lang siyang laruan. Bahala siya, buhay niya yan eh. And then one day, she keeps on insisting herself to me. Sa school, lagi niya akong kinakausap. Hanggang sa naging partners kame sa thesis na ginagawa namin. Being the gentleman, okay lang sa akin. Nasa condo kame ni Lauren. Kailangan kong ipaliwanag 'to sakanya. "Hon, it's just for school." Sigaw ko habang nasa kusina. Pinagluto ko siya ng favorite niyang pasta. She's arranging the table. Binaba ko yung pasta sa lamesa. I hug her from behind. "Hon, sorry na." Sabi ko. Pinaharap ko siya sa akin. I kissed her lips. "Basta, good boy ha." "Opo." And then, she give me a wet kiss. Nilalapit niya yung katawan niya sa akin. Nadadala na rin ako. Pinasok ko yung kamay ko sa loob ng shirt niya. May nararamdaman akong nabubuhay sa ibabang parte ko. Ngumisi si Lauren at hinawakan yon. Masarap pala 'to. She's about to unbuckle my belt nang biglang nag-time yung oven. Okay na yung bread. Napasimangot si Lauren. Matagal na niyang gusto kaso, ayaw ko lang. Ngayong gusto ko na din, mukhang ayaw naman ng tadhana. Days have passed. Puspusan na para sa paggawa ng thesis. Julie and I. Nagiging close na ulit kame. Nagalit sa akin si Lauren. Kase pinagpaalam ko sakanya na Julie will stay sa condo overnight for our thesis. Nagalit din ako. Sobrang sensitive naman niya. Ending, Julie at my condo. She changed into a short and shirt. Bakit ganon? Parang mainit? Bukas naman yung aircon. We're on my sala. Nakasalampak siya sa sahig. She look hot that I wanted to take her here. Bakit ang libog ko pagdating kay Julie? I have to erase that in my head. So, I ask for a break. Kakainin ko lang siya. Oh God. I mean, kakain lang muna kame ng dinner. Nagpa-deliver lang kame ng pizza at pasta. Ang sexy niya tignan habang kumakain. Bigla na lang she look into my eyes. "Sorry, Elmo." I didn't say a word. "Feeling ko ang sama-sama ko. Sinaktan kita. Pinagpalit kita. Elmo, pinagsisihan ko ang lahat ng iyon. Sorry. Patawarin mo ako. Akala ko mahal ko siya. Pero, ikaw pa rin pala." After she said that. I kissed her frenzy. Galit ako. Sasaktan ko siya sa paraang gusto ng isip, puso at katawan ko. I will get what is mine. Nagulat siya. She's not even responding. Tinulak niya ako. Sinampal. Ngumisi ako. Ipaparamdam ko sakanya kung gaano kasakit ang ginawa niya. Hinawakan ko ang ulo niya at hinalikan siya ulit. Mabagal lang sa umpisa. Hinihintay kong sumabay siya. "Jackpot. Alam ko namang bibigay ka rin eh." Sabi ko sa isip ko. I enter my tongue. This is getting hot. I start touching her skin. Her soft skin. She's moaning. I like that. My hands start wandering. Feeling her bare breast. I took off her shirt without breaking the kiss. This would be my first, and I love it. Yung babaeng pinangarap ko ang makakasama ko. We're each other's first. She took off my shirt too. Binuhat ko siya papasok sa kwarto. Ang sarap pagmasdan ng half naked Julie Anne. Inihiga ko siya sa kama. Unbutton her shorts and kiss her there, with a fabric on. Nakakalibog lalo because she's moaning. "Elmo. Ahh. Yes. Elmo." I don't know what will I do. Should I use my fingers on her or what. This. Is. My. Freaking. First. Too. Kiss her frenzy on the lips. Massage her breast. Paulit-ulit lang. Hindi. Ako. Marunong. Sa. Sex. Hinubad na ni Julie ang shorts ko. Kasama ang boxers. Nagulat siya. Napangisi ako. Hinubad ko na din ang panty niya. This is lust that I am feeling. Hubad na ako. Hubad na siya. Pinasok ko na lang bigla. Galit ako. Parusa 'to. "Ouch. Elmo, masakit." Dapat lang yan sayo. "Elmo, dahan-dahan." Pero, gagawin ko ang kabaligtaran. Labas - mabilis. Pasok - mabilis. She's crying. "Elmo, wag. Tama na. Elmo." Umiiyak lang siya. Wala akong pakialam. Gumaganti ako sa lahat ng sakit. She became silent, to moan is the only thing she can. Lalo kong binilisan. She can keep up with that. Nasasarapan na siya. This can't be. Binagalan ko. "Ohh. Elmo. Bilisan mo." Sigaw ni Julie. Well. I. Don't. Care. Labas - mabagal. Pasok - mabagal. "Elmo, please." She begged. Labas - mas mabagal. Pasok - mas mabagal. "Elmo, baby, I love you. Love me hard." She said. Tapos bigla niya akong hinalikan. "Faster, baby." Sigaw niya. "I also dreamt of doing this with you." Kinain na ako ng libog at pagmamahal kay Julie. I love her the way that a Princess like her should be love. "Ahh. Oh my God, Elmo." Paulit-ulit lang niyang sabi. Hanggang sa sabay namin naabot yung climax. Nainis pa nga siya kase sa loob ko nilabas. Daldal siya ng daldal, hanggang sa nabuhay ulit yung nasa baba ko. Ginawa ulit namin. May third round pa nga, at don, si Julie na ang nasa ibabaw. Thesis pala ha. Ewan ko. Pero, parang nakalimutan ko na si Lauren. "Tara Julie. Gawa tayo ng thesis." Aya ko sakanya. After class. Nginitian ko lang siya ng nakakaloko at ginantihan niya ako ng malanding ngiti. We became fuck buds. I only do this with her. And she to me. My first. Our first. Lauren and I broke up. Akala ko nung una hindi niya maiintindihan. I've explain it to her. Sabi ko mahal ko pa rin si Julie. Sabi niya, she expect this to happen. Kaya nung una pa lang, takot na siya. We graduated college, together. We became professionals. Magkahiwalay kame ng work. Pero, hindi pa rin mawawala yung selosan. Her current selos machine is Janine. Yung ate ko sa office. Yung partner ko, pero hanggang sa trabaho lang. "You don't have to be jealous of her, baby. Okay?" "E paano kung nagseselos ako?" She beamed. Tinawanan ko siya. "You don't have to. Ikaw lang ang mahal ko." Okay naman yung relationship namin. Masaya. And I think, it's time. "Tara, road trip tayo." "What's with you, Elmo?" "I'm just bored, Julie." Huminto kame sa tapat nung playground. Yung sa park. Kung saan niya ako sinagot. Sabi ko dun muna kame. Umupo lang kame. Pinagmamasdan yung mga bata. "Yes. It's a yes, Elmo." The little girl, whose 7 years old said that to a little boy who wears a blue shirt, with a printed design saying "I am Elmo." "I said, it's a yes Elmo." The teenage girl, whose 14 years old said to the teenage Elmo. Inagaw ko na ang atensyon ni Julie. "Those are your words saying yes to the 16 year old Elmo Magalona. You said yes to me, Julie. That was the happiest day of my life. I love you. Too much that I don't want to loose you again." Arkin and Kuya Frank came. They held me the big sticky notes. Tulad nung binibigay sa akin ni Julie dati. It says, "Marry." "Me." "Please." I was the one holding the "Me." sign. Maxx, Saab, Clara, Joanna and Jac came. Their shirt says, "You." "Should." "Answer." "Yes." In that order. Jac shirt says the exclamation point. Julie walks out. Hinabol ko siya. "Hoy, teka lang. I'm proposing here. Tapos, lalayas ka lang?" "Akala mo purkit nag-propose ka sa harap ng pamilya mo't pamilya ko, papayag na agad ako?" Pinandilatan ko lang siya ng mata at tumango. "Ano ka? Sinuswerte?" "Hindi ba?" I asked. "Hindi." She said. "Bakit hindi?" "Elmo, ayokong mag-settle agad-agad. Sabi ko sayo dati, magpatayo na tayo ng bahay para sa future natin. Pag-ipunan na natin, sabi mo wag muna, bata pa naman tayo. Oh ngayon, pag kinasal tayo, saan tayo titira?" Tinawanan ko siya. "Tawa ka diyan." "Edi, just say yes to my wedding proposal, Julie." "What?" She asked. "Turn to your right. Yung katapat ng playground." There is this big tarp that says, "You are my future, Julie Anne."

"Baby, can I be your first dance?" She look straight to me then smile. It's more like of a smirk. "Of course, your handsomeness." We dance as slow as the music playing inside the ball. She's pretty. Sobrang ganda niya. Yung mga ngiti niya yung isa sa nagbibigay ng lakas sa akin. She's one of a kind and I really love her. Tumingin siya sa akin. Mata sa mata. Then, she whispered "thank you" and after she gave me a hug. A warm hug. Lumaki siyang sweet and caring. And I feel so lucky and bless to have her. Habang nagsasayaw kame, may naalala akong isang event sa buhay ko na never kong makakalimutan. Sabado nun. Technical rehearsal ng Party Pilipinas. Third episode simula nung ibalik ito at wakasan ang Sunday All Stars. One way of reuniting with her. With my Queen, Julie. Just like her old self. She came early and prepared. She's having chitchat with some friends and is laughing along with them. I like her like this. Yung Julie na carefree, yung Julie na masaya. But, I am missing the Julie that I love. Yung Julie na ngumingiti dahil sa akin, yung Julie na tumatawa dahil ako yung dahilan. Yung Julie na yon, miss na miss ko na. Ang dami nang nangyari. February 14, 2015. Valentine's Day. At ang araw na pinili kong sundin ang puso ko. I planned everything. Mula sa parents ni Julie, sa mga friends niya at co-artists namin dito, the directors, the staffs. Basta lahat. Si Julie na lang ang kulang. Nung una nagre-rehearse lang sina Kuya Mark at Ate Jen tapos bigla akong pumasok. I cleared my throat. "To the girl who's wearing an orange shirt and a maong pants that have a blue cap on, Happy Valentine's day." Tinutukso ng lahat si Julie. Umiiling lang siya. Tss. Ayaw pa kunyari eh. "You know who you are but if you wanted me to name names, I will." I cleared my throat again. Pampa-alis ng kaba. "To the queen of my heart, Ms. Julie Anne San Jose, happy Valentine's day." Namumula siya. Nakangiti. Yung hindi ko ma-explain na ngiti. Bumaba ako ng stage. "Pwede ba tayong sumayaw?" I asked. I offered her my right hand and she instantly grab it. May kuryente. Kinikilig ako. "Ang ganda mo." Bulong ko sakanya. "Kahit ang haggard ko na?" "Haggard ka na ba sa lagay na yan?" Sa totoo lang, she's still the most beautiful in my eyes. "Ewan ko sayo, Elmo." Tapos hinampas na naman niya ako. Part 'to ng namiss ko. Yung Julie na hahampasin ako kase kinikilig. "Para saan ba 'to? May sayaw-sayaw pa. Parang timang." Reklamo na naman niya. "Wala lang. Gusto ko lang malaman ng buong Studio 7 kung gaano ko kagustong maging part ulit ng buhay mo." Natahimik siya. Tahimik lang kaming dalawa kahit ang ingay ng buong paligid. Her arms were encircled around my neck at ako nakahawak sa bewang ni Julie. "Julie, will you be my baby again?" I asked. I'm too nervous to have a long speech. Diniretso ko na. Nagulat siya sa tanong ko. "Manligaw ka muna." She smirked. Someone poke me and that bring me back to reality. "You're spacing out." The pretty girl said. May naalala lang ako. "You're blushing. I think I know who you are thinking." She said. The music stopped. "I think you better go. Your friends are calling you." Nginitian niya ako. Lumakad siya papalayo sa akin. Ni-ready ko na yung camera ko. Yun nga pala ang purpose ko kaya ako nandito. Kapag ngumingiti siya, isang tao lang ang naaalala ko. Kapag nagsasalita siya, parehong tao ang nasa isip ko. Nakatayo siya sa isang sulok. Naghihintay. May naalala na naman ako. Rehearsal non para sa birthday prod niya. She'll turn 21. May 16, 2015. Kinabukasan birthday niya. Nasa Green Room siya. Mag-isa, naghihintay. Naka-silip lang ako at inaabangan ang susunod niyang gagawin. Lalabas na dapat siya. Pero dumating si Arkin. Offering her the orange rose. There was a sound. Nagsisimula na ang surprise ko. All of our co-artist are here. Thank goodness, they support me here. Yung pang-20th orange rose, it was his dad, Tito Jonathan. "I love you, Papa. Thank you." Narinig kong sabi niya. Papalapit na ako. I will be her 21st orange rose. As I offer the orange rose, nagsalita muna ako. "Hindi ako naging part ng 18th roses mo dati eh. Kaya ito, gumawa ako ng paraan para makasayaw ka sa araw ng birthday mo. Okay lang naman di ba?" She nodded and smile at me. Pahampas niyang kinawit ang mga kamay niya sa balikat ko. "Ang dami mong alam, bat di ka mag-teacher." Natawa ako. Simpleng banat talaga ni Julie, iba yung dating sa akin. "Eh kase, mas magaling kang maging teacher, kesa sa akin." She was clueless. "Ha?" "Naturuan mo kase 'tong puso ko na mahalin ka." Natawa siya. "Corny." I was laughing with her when she kiss me on the cheek. "Thank you, Elmo." Everyone clapped their hands and greet Julie a happy birthday. Napa-balik ako sa ngayon. Nagpapalakpakan din ang mga tao. "Our Prom King, John Andrew Concepcion." Tapos may tumabing lalaki at babae sa akin na proud na proud. "Uy Elmo, pare." Si Sam. Nandito rin. Kasama si Jasmine. "And our Prom Queen, Kate Leslie Magalona." She was crowned. Sobrang ganda lang ng panganay ko. When she smiles, parang Mommy niya, parang si Julie. "Pare, I hope you won't be too hard with my son." It was obvious, John have something for my beautiful daughter, Kate. "Elmo, don't dare be a strict daddy to Kate." Jasmine warned. "I'm sorry but the Mom is the one who is strict." Nagtawanan kame. "Anyways, where is Julie?" Jasmien asked. "Kaya nga pare, nasaan ang Misis mo?" "She have to be home. Julie's 3 weeks pregnant with our 2nd baby."