Júlia O. R

Just as the video package, highlighting Shane and other finalists, wraps up, he turns to Ilya and whispers “I’m wearing a plug.”

Shane’s name is announced and he rises from his seat with a painted on media-smile as Ilya sputters beside him, eyes wide and hand digging into Shane’s forearm as though to keep him from going to the stage. Shane places a kiss on his cheek and carefully loosens his grip before walking away, leaving Ilya looking downright furious behind him.

The producers obviously invited Ilya and Shane, but Shane thought the experience sounded too over stimulating and too many days to be out of routine. Yuna would never subject herself to doing something where she couldn't control the narrative or the edit. David is really okay with going with the flow and Ilya seemed excited which is enough reason for him. They can even be called Team Hollanov still.

He knows it’s bad for his posture so he usually tries to be good and sleep on his back but often wakes up on his tummy. David’s heart had gone soft when Shane had fallen asleep on the couch at their cottage last summer, on his stomach and open mouthed deep sleeping. It had taken him back to baby Shane, who would curl himself up on his stomach on his bed or on David or Yuna’s chest, hands tucked up under his chin like he still does now. He’d always loved to make himself cosy, loved best of all falling asleep snuggled up to one of his parents.

Anyway- Ilya doesn’t find out until the cottage of course, this habit of his Shane’s, how he’ll wake up and Shane will have slipped out of the cradle of his arms and be sprawled on his front head turned so his cheek is all mushed into the pillow. Ilya started to realise on the nights Shane was extra sleepy, he’d subconsciously shuffle them so that Ilya was on his back and Shane could roll on top of him, he’d let out a happy little grunt and tuck his arms to his chest, hands under his chin and be asleep in seconds. Sometimes Shane tried to fight it, and he’s tuck himself down on his back or his side and Ilya would hear his breathing even out. Sure enough he’ll wake up to Shane soft whine and rolling in bed, shuffling until he’s onto his stomach, his brow going lax and lips pouted with a content sigh, arm thrown out on top of Ilya or his thigh hooked up over him.

Ilya loves it, he finds it sweet when Shane will go from watching a moving tucked against Ilya, big heavy tired blinks and then just sigh and wriggle until he’s on his tummy, and then in two breaths he’s out, deep heavy in sleep.

It’s cute, another thing that Ilya loves about him, a little Shane fact that lives in his mind. When Shane is fighting sleep with a spinning mind, fidgeting and worrying, Ilya will get his hand on Shane’s shoulder and mumble “roll over baby”, smooth him onto his stomach and rub Shane’s back, big open palm figure of eight between his shoulder blades, little kisses over the back of his head and neck till he settles.

This is going to be an very unpopular opinion, but I stand by it 😤

They're out, they're on the same team, they're not bound to one night meet ups, they're seeing each other all of the time, they're still getting frisky more nights than not

But one night they're both exhausted and just shower then get in bed. Cuddles and kisses yes of course, but no sex.

The wake up and have some more cuddles and kisses. Shane suggested a nice run before breakfast because the weather is really nice. So they go out, run, stop and climb on some rocks for fun, have a playful race back home. Then breakfast together on the couch, just chatting.

And the rest of the day is like that. They discuss getting some new patio furniture. Ilya wants a hot tub. Has practice been going well? That one rookie has been playing with more enthusiasm. Maybe he has a girlfriend now? Let's plan a trip for Mom and Dad's wedding anniversary - we can all go.

Dinner is eaten outside in the sunshine. The evening concludes with a long jog and a movie neither are entirely invested in but it's fun to make jokes about it. Then they shower and climb into bed. They fall asleep mid cuddle and conversation about game schedules.

When Shane wakes up in the morning, he is still in Ilya's arms.

"Ilya. We didn't have sex."

"Last night? Guess we forgot."

"Or the night before."

"... Or all day yesterday."

Of course they then pounce on each other and overcompensate for the past 36 hours.

Shane, however, begins to worry. Why didn't they have sex? Does Ilya not want him physically anymore? Does he not want Ilya? Is this what happens when you're with someone for so long?

Ilya is mostly confused with himself. What has he ever not wanted to fuck? Why didn't he initiate anything? Did he miss Shane's signals of interest that are usually so obvious?

But together, the conclude that they neither didn't want to have sex not wanted to have sex and missed the other's signs. They were just enjoying each other without sex. Like couples do. They can be intimate and show love without sex because they aren't hiding. They all of each other. They're entirely in this together. No disappearing for weeks or months. The other will always be right there regardless what they do or don't do.

The maybe they start having an occasional planned "celibate period" as a way to reinvigorated their sex lives and roleplay when they couldn't see each other daily.

Ilya Rozanov: Don’t do that.

Shane Hollander: What?

Ilya Rozanov: You think every time you say that, and flash those big bottom eyes, I’ll do whatever you want. Not this time.

Shane Hollander:

Ilya Rozanov:

Shane Hollander: Please, Baby? For me?

Ilya Rozanov:

It starts as Wiebe & Ilya just trying out new combinations and an off-hand comment that Ilya makes about “sticking the gays on the line together” but surprisingly, it works, after some fine tuning. Ilya at center, Troy at right, and Shane, after some solid practicing, at left.

When it first debuts, it’s in a low stakes game, but Twitter goes bonkers. Barrett scores a hat trick, and Ilya very nearly scores a Gordie Howe hat trick in a single shift. Ilya and Shane already are on the penalty kill together, and Barrett is on the first line with Ilya, but the three of them on a shift move through the poor Puffins D line like butter (throwing my team under the bus for sake of this narrative). The Cens were already having a killer season, but the press around the Husband Line goes crazy. Harris contemplates whether to kiss or kill Ilya for the idea.

Other players get in on the craze, making jokes about Barrett being Hollanov’s third. At first, the jokes make Shane really uncomfortable, until he & Ilya reaffirm there are no thirds and that there is more than enough space in their bedroom for just the two of them. That being said, Marleau, Sveta, Rose, and Bood have a field day on Twitter.

The Husband Line doesn’t get used frequently, despite its popularity. Wiebe decides to pull it out at 40 seconds left in Game 6 of the Stanley Finals, and the crowd goes NUTS. They don’t even have time to react between face off and Shane netting the cup winning goal.

“you are here” “of course i am” “shane hollander is taking me home” “shane hollander-rozanov is taking you home” “shane hollander takes my last name” “yes he did. do you want to come home with him?” “i’ll go anywhere shane hollander goes” “okay then let’s go home baby”

-

*at kingfisher*

Shane: Hey, Ilya, maybe lay off on the pizza. It’s a little too oily for when we’re not in off season 🤦‍♂️

Ilya: All the oil, it’s for owner old man Hunter’s old man joints 🤭

Scott: Hey!

-

*banter with kip about reasons why scott is goated*

Kip: see? look at his abs—rock solid 😋

Ilya: He just wants, what is it? a taste of home, to remind himself of the caves back in stone age 🤷‍♂️

Scott: 🙄😒

-

*Ilya sprays him with ice from his skates*

Ilya: Hey Hunter! You’ve got ice in your hair. Good luck getting it out though, it blends in with you’re white hairs 😈

Scott: shut up Rozanov, you’re the reason my hair’s turning white in the first place 😒

-

*at kingfisher*

Shane: Hey, Ilya, maybe lay off on the pizza. It’s a little too oily for when we’re not in off season 🤦‍♂️

Ilya: All the oil, it’s for owner old man Hunter’s old man joints 🤭

Scott: Hey!

-

*banter with kip about reasons why scott is goated*

Kip: see? look at his abs—rock solid 😋

Ilya: He just wants, what is it? a taste of home, to remind himself of the caves back in stone age 🤷‍♂️

Scott: 🙄😒

-

*Ilya sprays him with ice from his skates*

Ilya: Hey Hunter! You’ve got ice in your hair. Good luck getting it out though, it blends in with you’re white hairs 😈

Scott: shut up Rozanov, you’re the reason my hair’s turning white in the first place 😒