magic.madness.heaven.sin

“Judas, I’m not lying. They are dead,” Magnus insisted, watching the other seriously. “The last line was murdered by their own father around the same time Valentine was on the rise.”

Originally posted by hwob

Jude continued to look at the other before letting out an angry groan, slamming his fist down on the table, “I’ve only ever wanted one thing in this miserable life, to get the justice that was deserved. And I can’t even get that- how is that fair.”

Diana took another sip of her drink. “Well, I am sure whoever you have lost would not want you to just get by.” A warlock of her age would be well versed in the signs of drinking while mourning, it was a practice she had indulged with on some of her more vulnerable moments over the centuries. She twirled the stem of the glass between her fingers absentmindedly while looking him over. “I’m intrigued to know what your idea of enjoyment is, care to give me a taste?”

“I’m not sure you’re at liberty to say what my family would have wanted, honestly I’d rather be with them then here.” Sometimes he thought that, thought that it would be easier to end his suffering and just be with his wife and his child once more, but he knew that wasn’t the way things should be done. He was stronger than that. Jude chuckled darkly at the others mention of giving her a taste, “Well this is one, drinking myself into oblivion. Revenge is another. Dark magic. Light torture sometimes comes close.”

“Yes, I’m sure!” Addy sighed softly, still smiling. “What’s wrong with me not liking confrontation, or not being good at fighting? It’s not like life is all about that. Right?”

She nodded and kept walking. “What kind of deals do you usually make with people? I mean, you did mention you have a business… what do you do?” She asked curiously.

“When you’re a Shadowhunter, then yeah, it kind of is all about that. Your job is to fight, it’s what you’re paid to do. So you’re clearly in the wrong job if you don’t like doing either of those things.” He pointed out, because they were soldiers to the Clave and soldiers were expected to fight and kill. How would she be able to do that if she hated confrontation. 

“This and that, it varies. But I get a lot of business other Warlock’s don’t get because I delve in magic they won’t. Basically people come to me when they want things in their life to be better, I give them a potion or use a spell and then they pay me for my services.”

Magnus frowned, turning to look at him. “Lying? Think about it, Judas. Why would I lie about this? What’s in it for me?”

Jude was quiet for a long moment, trying to think of reasons as to why Magnus would lie to him about this, “To save the family- because you know what I would do to them if I found them. Telling me they’re dead stops me from going out and hunting them down one by one.”

Breathing deeply, Magnus took a long sip of his drink, eyes trained on the liquid in the cup. “That won’t be necessary,” he said carefully. “That Shadowhunter family… they are all dead.”

“Why not?” He asked, wondering what kind of good guy speech the other was going to give him about why he should get his revenge and probably something about him and his moral compass. But what came out of his mouth, well he hadn’t been expecting that. “You’re lying.” He deflected, because he didn’t want to believe it was true, how else would he be able to find closure if they were all dead.

“Wouldn’t you rather have a good time in this life than just get through it?” It was almost spoken in a way that challenged his current state of mind; a specialty of hers. Diana rolled the stem of her glass through her fingertips some more before picking up the glass and taking another sip. 

“You’d think that would be the good way to approach it, but I’m not so sure anymore. Getting by seems to be enough, that and my idea of enjoyment is probably not the same as most people’s.” He was a bitter person, hooked on death and revenge as well as alcohol, pry him with enough of that and he did tend to have fun, but not tonight. Tonight was a night of mourning for him. 

Diana took the seat beside the handsome man, ordering herself a drink. Her eyebrow quirked at his rather intense statement. As the drink was set in front of her, she clasped the stem in between two fingers and brought the glass to her lips, tasting the bittersweet, rosy liquid it contained. “Rough night?” She brought the glass back down to rest on the napkin, twirling the stem through her fingers.

Jude scoffed at the others question, still only focusing on the drink in front of him instead of the company beside him, “More like a rough life.” Because sure the night and the day had been bad for him, but then he didn’t think the anniversary of his wife and son’s death would ever become easy to deal with. “But I get through it, with the help of some very strong spirits.” 

“A man can hope, right?” Beau laughed and it was warm. He enjoyed poking fun at Jude, which was interesting considering he was a warlock. “Pretty sure he’s spoken for anyways and I’ve heard about the Lightwood’s fighting skills. Dangerous battle that would be.” He smirked a little. “I know what you’re saying. It was more a figure of speech than an actual comment.” He shrugged. “Maybe. But maybe not. Have you ever asked him? Ever felt like he was lying to you?”

“You can, but I’m going to turn you down every single time. I’m more of a redhead kind of guy.” He continued to tease the other, a smirk clear on his face as he did so. “He is and I’ve heard he’s good, but I’m better. Though then I’d have to deal with Magnus condemning me for killing, maiming or transforming his boyfriend. It might be easier to let Lightwood win.” He considered, because a death with silence and peace sounded better then a life of Magnus whining in his ear. Jude thought about the others words for a moment before sighing, “Sometimes he’s twisted his words or purposely held back, but I can’t say he’s ever lied to me.”

Lucas didn’t have many people in his life, none really that he would call close to him but from the moment he met him, Lucas had felt a connection even if it wasn’t there on Jude’s side. He really tried hard to build a friendship there though as usual it appeared to be failing.  He sat and drank the drink on his table before he moved to pull a couple of notes out of his pocket, sliding it across the bar to where Jude was. “For a drink at least.” He murmured simply before he headed out of the bar. 

Jude wished the other would understand that this wasn’t going to work, they weren’t going to be friends and Jude’s outlook of the other wasn’t going to magically change because he told him he was worth the hassle or that he should have someone with him. His life was not a movie, it was real and hard and heartbreaking, it wasn’t some fantasy. A fantasy that the younger warlock was clearly stuck in when it came to looking at Jude and thinking of him as some mentor that would help him succeed. He didn’t know why he felt the need to grow an attachment to him, but he didn’t like it and he wished the other would stop. When he noticed him coming back other he had to hold back a groan, but when it was simply to put cash down in front of him he muttered a thanks, not even noticing that he had left the bar because of his behaviour.

Honor could understand that. Jude was, to the surprise of most people, incredibly sensitive when it came down to it. He held onto a lot of pain. They all did in fact but they dealt with it differently and it was born of different situations. He had been through something Honor hoped she never had to endure. “Mhm… Good for you and your community perhaps… which consists of just yourself but continue to talk out of your arse if you wish Mister.” She playful jibed, humming as she brought her glass to her lips to drink a sip again, sighing in disappointment as the taste didn’t quite hit the spot the way she wanted it to and ghosting her hand over the rim. The drink changed before their eyes into rum; a far more palatable beverage in her eyes causing her to elicit a happy hum. “I figured you would have but we both know I’m amazing and have far more talent than you give me credit for and unless I offer my assistance you are far too proud to ask for it because that would be admitting I am better than you.” Their words were as usual, simply for show, an act that kept their friendship if you could call it that, ticking over. “Oh? A really happy Nephilim… You don’t come across many of them. Jude; you insult everyone. Maybe she has heard of you and is therefore not phased by your ever charming demeanor.”

"A community of one is the best kind of community that you can get." Because he was not a people pleaser, he was not someone who would choose to be around people unless he was very drunk. Sure he may talk to people in passing, but the conversations tended to be kept short and to the point, not much room for lingering questions and idle chit chat. "I've never said you're not talented, I simply keep you out of my plans because most of the time it's things you don't believe or agree in. Best to keep you out the way so I don't have to sit and listen to you lecture me about the risks of using dark magic from time to time. So I don't think me not asking for your assistance is quite what you explained there." Jude hummed in acknowledgement, "She's new to the shadow world of New York, give her a few weeks and she'll be as miserable as the rest of them. She hadn't heard of me, she just took it as though I was complimenting her, it was very unnerving."

“Well I have to say, if we are alike in any ways it must mean she was a particularly amazing woman because I know I am.” She teased lightly, giving him a smirk. “I’d like to learn a little more about her some time if you ever feel like sharing that is.” It wasn’t something she would insist on because some pain was never lost and some memories were private and intimate for only those who experienced them. Jude was a private person when it came to his past and much of his life. He was selective about what he shared. “Jude; you are up to mischief all the time, that isn’t a new realization.” Honor chuckled though, sipping on her drink as he spoke, face becoming a little more serious as he mentioned his family. “Is there anything you need help with?” She knew it was pointless to mention finding them as Jude was the type to have explored every avenue in that way but there may still have been some use for her that he knew of. “A Shadowhunter that doesn’t like to fight? They must be quite the odd one out in the Institute.”

“Maybe one day, but not today.” He told the other whilst swirling the liquid in his drink around in his glass, because today it hurt to talk about them, a few snippets here and there and he was fine. But to dredge up all those old memories of them on their anniversary would break him. “I’m appalled that you think that way about me, I do nothing but good in this community.” He responded with a sly smile on his face, showing that his words were utter bullshit. “I’ve got it handled, but if I need back up I’ll call you.” He noted before letting out a small scoff, nodding in confirmation that she had heard right. “Well when I took her there the other day, it was her first time in the city. First time encountering downworlders up close and by herself by the sounds of it- she was really happy too-... even when I insulted her. Odd all around that one.”

“I wouldn’t be me if I allowed you to completely get your way now would I. Besides, I’m possibly the one person who doesn’t bend to your will, someone has to keep that ego of yours in check just a little bit.” She smiled softly though, resting a hand on his back for the briefest of moments before removing it. “No games it is then.” Honor wasn’t about to force him but likewise she wanted to offer him company without it being too out of character. Jude wasn’t the type to like that. Then again, he didn’t particularly like company either. “Tell me about your latest ventures.” She asked, picking up her own glass to begin drinking from it.

“Unfortunately it’s because you remind me too much of Lori and hurting you would equivocate to hurting her in my head, you’re lucky.” Though there were other reason as to why he didn’t mind Honor’s company on occasion, she knew when to back off and when to push, she had an act of being able to read him well, a talent which he wished she didn’t have. “My latest ventures? You make it sound like I’m up to mischief all of the time, I’m not. I paid Magnus a visit, he gave me some information regarding the people who murdered my family though I’m not sure if it’s a dead end or not. I met a Shadowhunter who doesn’t like to fight- which... didn’t make sense in my head. Other then that business has been going as usual, nothing out of the ordinary happening.”

Adelaide wasn’t exactly comfortable with the subject they were debating. She had always followed the rules, but here she was, breaking them. Instead of talking about it more, she simply shrugged and smiled, eager to divert the focus of their conversation to something else. 

Chuckling, she shook her head a little. “No, I don’t think that’s it. I think they just knew I never really liked fighting, so they didn’t want to put me in situations that might involve confrontations,” Addy said. And she hoped that was true. It had to be.

Starting to feel like this had been the biggest mistake in her life, Adelaide gulped, hoping Jude would have a change of heart and agree to take her to the Institute. “It was valuable to me,” she mumbled, praying to the angel Raziel that she would make it through the night safely. A genuine sigh of relief left her lips as she nodded, agreeing to his terms. “Thank you. Thank you so much!” She said, running a hand through her hair and then holding onto the straps of her backpack tightly, her knuckles turning white. She was relieved that he was showing her the way, but scared that they wouldn’t get there before night fell. “Is it far from here?” Addy asked, waiting for him to lead the way.

"A Shadowhunter who doesn't like fighting, now that is a first. I thought that was the first thing they taught you, how to fight? How to be a soldier to the Clave?" At the mention of not liking confrontation Jude's brow furrowed further. "And you're sure you're Nephilim?"

"Don't thank me, we made a deal and I do tend to be a man of my word. Don't want rumours spreading that I go back on deals, I won't get any business if that happens." Because he relied on people trusting him enough to come to him when they wanted something only a warlock could provide, it's how he got paid. "Not far. Thank God."

Honor chuckled softly. “It sounds like bull shit Jude Dolohov but very you.” She answered back with a smirk. “Keep going and I might make you earn the drink with some sort of drinking game.” She teased, moving to pour a generous amount of the alcohol into two glasses, sliding one over to the other man. 

“I’m mourning, can’t you let me have my way for once?” He asked, an eyebrow raised in hopes that she would give in and he could start nursing the bottle until it was empty. “I’m not playing games tonight, so if you insisted on that’s how it was going to be - I’d find another bar.”

“That wasn’t what this was about.” He tried to explain sounding a little exasperated and attempting to get the other man to understand. “I wasn’t saying you were an inconvenience! I just… I wanted to try and help. To be there for you cause no one should have to be alone with that sorta thing. Being alone just… it makes it all so much more worse. That’s all I wanted. I’m sorry. Nevermind.” It was at that point he moved to sit elsewhere, too stubborn to leave just yet but not knowing what else to do. 

“Unless you can raise the dead then I don’t think there is anything you can do to help. I don’t need anyone to be there for me, I don’t need a shoulder to cry on or someone to tell me there there. I’m quite content on being alone, maybe you feel the need to fill your life with people for who knows whatever reason, but I do not-.. This isn’t going to get better just because you’re here. If anything you’re making the problem worse.” He didn’t understand why this young warlock tried to seek out friendship with him, he was pretty sure he made it clear from the very beginning that he didn’t do friendships. You’d think after many hints the kid would get it, clearly that was not the case.

“Only kind of hot?” Beau joked, waggling his eyebrows as a joke, barely holding back a chuckle. “You are never going to see eye to with everyone. If yo do you should marry them and never look back.” His smirked was sadder now, but only fractionally. “But even if you don’t agree you’d think he’d lie about something as serious as this? Magnus ears his damn heart on his sleeve. SPin him a sad story and he eats it up.”

“I keep telling you Ravenscar, you’re not my type.” Jude stopped his glass midway to his mouth, turning to look at the other with a horrified expression on his face, “The thought of marrying Magnus is a deeply unsettling one, so thank you for putting that into my head. But I’ve married once, I don’t think I’d ever marry again- Lori was and still is the love of my life, nothing will ever diminish what I feel for her.” Because he had been old fashioned when it came to relationships, he truly did believe that you only loved and married once and he had already done that, so for now it was just the waiting game until he was reunited with his family. “I don’t know, he knows what I’m capable of and what I’m willing to do when it comes to finding the family who did this to me. Maybe he evaded the truth to keep whoever they are safe.”