JollyRazor

Laying out rhymes like it’s a puzzle

Arranging concepts as if it’s poetry

And finding beauty within the struggle.

Such a soothing feeling this is

Finally leaving the tunnel

Where my letters were imprisoned

And my expression became subtle.

I had no care in the world

Things stopped moving me

So I wore a numb texture

And it was fooling me.

I stopped believing in love

I thought of joy as a phase

Lost my way in search of feelings

But I was caught in a daze

A haze, a maze

A pitiful hole where I’ll start to decay.

I forgot how to be

I wore too many faces

I Lost my phrases

And The pages of my mind

Were filled with spaces

There were no traces

Of a human.

But my brain’s been haywire lately

It’s back to creating realms

And this time around

I’m not scared of what it tells.

Worried what the unknown may hold

It might hold a chest of gold

Or a body frozen cold.

It may unveil secrets

no human has ever known

Such as mermaids being real

Or Atlantis having a throne.

It may hold an entire universe

But it could be void of life

A dark world down below

That doesn’t come with a guide.

I don’t know what to think

But I’m not afraid to dive deep

I’ve dealt with that fear already

And it’s time to take a leap.

To a world undiscovered

Where magic might be reality

A world full of wonders

That floats without gravity.

So it’s time to face the waves

Take a deep breath and start the dive

And once my oxygen runs low

Find a way to survive

To stay alive

Maybe find a magic potion

And be the first person to say

I have conquered the ocean.

With melodies often violent

He keeps his eyes firmly shut

Praying he’d gain some silence

Gain some peace to dim the noise

Maybe find pieces of his tune

Picking apart each constellation

And playing catch-up with the moon

His eyes are locked on the prize

His heart ready to make a statement

About the chords within his soul

In a musical arrangement.

So he picks up a cello

Plays the strings of a guitar

Gives an instrument to every planet

And sells tickets to the stars

Oh what a cosmic gathering

All the cosmos are here listening

To a song so soothing

But often gets crippling

It pierces through the heart

Leaves a sense of non belonging

Reminds you of the times

You’ve been secretly longing

For a place to call your own

Instead of floating within space

Or a roof above your head

And the feeling of being safe.

But the stars are listening

You mustn’t look below

Just keep it all together

We need to wrap the show

So bring me the choir

Let them sing the epilogue

And lay this heart to rest

Without external monologue.

Birds chirping,

Seagulls singing.

The sound

of the wind

Intertwining with 

The dancing 

Of the waves.

Sand golden

Like the sun

And a sky

Partially clear.

I’ve always known

This place

As a shelter,

Where things

Come to be

Or come to die.

A safe haven

Disguised as

A lifeline.

A place to

Start over

Or continue 

What you started.

A cozy home

Without expectations

No family

And no complications.

I’ve always known

This place

As a shelter,

Till one day

It stopped

A soul too,

my darling,

can be hollow,

void of life,

and cold to the touch.

I’ve seen it myself.

How the mind

eats itself up,

leaving one with

no sense of being,

and an oozing melody.

A hymn for forgotten gods,

a eulogy for an unconscious self,

a chant for the soul that was,

and a march into madness.

Oh what a shame 

when it comes to this,

a person becomes a figure 

a mere vessel of an individual.

And so one becomes abandoned.

Cobwebs of regrets

start to pile up.

The carrier starts to deform,

and another soul gets lost.

One dies

in hope of a rebirth,

but the void

was never lavish.

And so as on decays,

the hollowness still lingers.

One must become

a mere canister,

a case that holds nothings,

a broken wooden box

forgotten in a cabinet

on top of a cemetery wall.

Then, and only then,

when one becomes none.

The soul too,

Shades of sanity slip between the madness, and a fleeting moment of pure silence emerges.

You’re okay, but that’ll last for a mere second; Soon, this too will be insignificant, and the delusions will find a way.

You’ll believe your mom’s dead again, and that your dad probably despises you, you’ll suspect your siblings are scheming, and your friends are all deceiving; but that’s only the start.

Soon the world will change, your entire reality will shift in color, you’ll forget the roads you once walked, the complications of your face, till eventually, you question who you are.

The madness will take over, it’ll take the shape of normalcy, it’ll be what you’ve known all your life and you’ll be accustomed to the routine.

Today, you’re a force not to be messed with, tomorrow, maybe you should die, the next day hate your entire family, and for the remainder of the week, wake up, live a warped version of reality, and repeat the process.

As we evaporate into oblivion,

Our memories cease to exist,

And our eyes stop blooming.

We are only remains

Of who we were,

Abolished by a sinister counsel,

Doomed to be in this cell

As we wait for

Light to come through.

But the walls are broad,

The windows are shut,

The doors are soundproof,

And the ground is freezing.

We may scream at full volume,

But no one would

Make out our voice,

They may hear mumbling,

That will be passed

As another lost soul,

And they are many in these parts,

Left waiting for extinction,

Or one’s simple demise,

Because the deafening sound

Of the blade used against us

Echoes deep within our ears.

And how could it not?

In my head

There are planets

Worlds I created 

Universes I made

And I’m lost in the middle

I struggle to move

Between all the wreckage

Trapped endlessly 

In a shifting reality

And I don’t think

People get it

One minute I’m on earth

The next I leave the plant

Then I find myself stranded

In a blurry space

With no sense of self

I juggle my own perception 

Piece out who I am

And though I finish the puzzle

Every single time

The final image turns out

Different

I am detached

From reality

And I am confused

As to who I am

I notice as things

move around me

But I can never

Make sense of anything

Everything moves

So rapidly

And the switches happen

So viciously

Till I can’t make sense

Of my surroundings

I say things

And do so much

But I never realize

What I’m actually doing

Then I go home

I lay in my bed

And I find myself

In a different plant

One I should call home

But for some reason

I still wear you on my ears

Disguised in the form of an earring

And I can’t help it but to hear

The sound of your voice as I’m tearing

As you keep on appearing 

Whenever I close my eyes

Because I always miss you

In the morning as I rise

But I keep my distance

And I entertain the lies

Hoping that when you come home

You’ll change the lows into highs

Though truthfully I’m hurting

And no one hears the cries

No one sees me walking

Into my own demise

Though they give me advice

Telling me it’ll be okay

But as I lay into my bed

Knowing you’re away

I don’t think of nothing 

I just want you to stay

But I’m not allowed to say

What’s on my mind today

Maybe tomorrow is a better day

Or maybe I’m just in the way

I don’t really know

But I want you around

Because you’re my safe space

Cupid shot his arrow

In the form of deadly ammo

But he struck not a person

This time he got the shadow.

Hence he was created

A soul cursed to be immortal

And a fleeting reflection

That can never be normal.

Trapped endlessly

Looking for connection

Following people around

With no sense of direction

Fighting for attention

Or a slight projection

Of someone’s affection.

Oh what a lonely feeling

For one to be a fraction

Not a whole person

But a light’s reaction

Not able to make moves

Can’t even take an action

Because only crazy people

Would enjoy your interaction

Yet for normal people

You’re just science in action

A joy to look at sometimes

But grant no satisfaction

You don’t give of passion

Admit it man, You’re only a distraction.

But you’re born to be a shadow

And shadows never leave

You’re like a ghost story

Most of us don’t believe

But we’d like to experience

Maybe to perceive

The level of madness

We’re bound to achieve.

And so just like a shadow

I can always guarantee 

That I’m always around