Clipping through the wall

this is what it feels like to be in your late 20s

stop drinking beer with the deer and come have a cider with the spiderrrr

Went to a fabric store yesterday and saw a sewing machine that did embroidery of photos and the example was of a newborn baby and it was so fucking insane looking I asked an employee if I could buy it and she looked at it and was like “oh my god eugh what the fuck… i think that’s my bosses grandkid….I think you should just take it” so I did

imagine if i did my work. if i sat down and Did it. and it was Done. can you even imagine such a thing

Back when i was like. 9 i watched a cuck porn video And i didnt quite understand the concept of what it was But i remember being so sad about how the woman was talking to her husband while she was fucking this other guy. and then she broke the couch and she said "uh oh sweetie we broke your couch.." all condescendingly And then he said "i LOVED that couch.😕" and it made me so upset i cried

i dont know what love island is but from what ive heard its like danganronpa for people that use snapchat

I love when someone is explaining instructions to a group I’m in and they look at me and it reminds them to say something about using preferred names/pronouns or that there’s vegan food options available. I go by my given name/pronouns and I’m not vegan but I’m proud that I can provide this service

“i also choose this guy’s dead wife” was easily the #1 funniest thing to ever be written on the internet.

i do also feel the need to add that phil8248 really liked the joke. he said his wife had always had a dark sense of humour, even about her illness and death, and seeing the joke made him feel like he was laughing with her one last time.