jack of all trades, master also of all those trades. no prablem 👌

having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved

basketball players fight over the basketball because they are hypnotized before each game to believe it is their egg

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

the thing about phone in bed is that it's so awesome. almost makes you feel like betraying & destroying yourself for nothing isn't all so bad

if you vote me for president i vow to make everything the ocean again. no more land only ocean. this will solve all of our problems and replace them with new, far more interesting problems

save me, rice mixed with some bullshit

you should get a second evening for reading fan fiction. And you should get an extra day in the week to do arts and crafts.

i need to change my whole life in one day. watch out world. i'm about to rearrange my furniture and cut my hair and develop new yet fully formed healthy habits all in the span of 24 glorious hours. i will also be buying groceries.