♡

Tiktok ASPD makes no sense to me in the way they talk about romance. They want people to not see them badly so they just lightly word things as "it's not that Im incapable, it's just limited." That limitation makes you incapable of genuine forms of love, care, empathy, and sympathy to the point it is just something we're not capable of. We are very indifferent and uncaring individuals, they don't even acknowledge the difference between genuine vs cognitive training and treat them as if they are the same or don't use the words at all, and treat it like we can feel on the exact capacity as those without the disorder/make us seem all-feeling. It feels highly similar to "you just haven't met the right person to fix you," when just getting into a relationship will not suddenly make you less anti social. They all happen to be in very loving and fulfilling relationships, constantly saying things like how much they love their S/O's as well and that "they'd never hurt them." It's just so blatantly watering down the complexity of romantic relationships and makes everyone think you don't, and will not mistreat people as long as you love them enough. The thing with ASPD is you can only love as much as you can. You can't love to the full extent, what we feel as alot to us realistically isn't much/enough for a normal persons emotional tank. It's just that way to us, it's still very shallow. Realistically; we wear others down because our affection, and want to give it is beyond low. It isn't enough because normal everyday people who naturally have these things need more. We can't give that so we often get hostile about it. We wear them down to make it enough. It is abusive, we do very abusive things to others. Abuse is more broad than people will ever admit and honestly, I don't mind the fact people don't and take it for what it is. It's because everyone is so scared to hurt everyones feelings that they just think they're being accepting. It just makes these people easier targets.

With all due respect a lot of this sounds like a very you problem. While yes, emotions are shallow. The traditional sense of feeling or being in love doesn't exist. "Wearing people down" doesn't happen for everyone. We can't feel the same intensity if at all of romantic love our partners feel. But that does not inhibit romantic gestures being performed. You dont have to feel something in order to perform the gesture. Needs can still be met. The correct words can be said to satisfy the desire for closeness a partner may want. Abuse is unnecessary. Wearing someone down so that they will accept less bc you can't percieve a way to meet needs is a skill issue.

I think I hit a nail too close on it's head with this one.

Someone telling you that having a disorder does not equate to abuse isnt you getting it right. Its pointing out that having a disorder does not mean you get to be a piece of shit.

Oh yeah, I definitely got my point proven. We can all go home now, shows over.

Ah, your one of those

♡♡♡ thanks for the interactions and getting my notes up ♡♡♡

Dude, its tumblr no one cares about that. But I just saw you are 21. Genuinely I hope you figure out how to function with the disorder better ans avoid internalized ableism. Anyways, Im gonna go do other stuff now

Kayyy, message me when you're done ♡

Tiktok ASPD makes no sense to me in the way they talk about romance. They want people to not see them badly so they just lightly word things as "it's not that Im incapable, it's just limited." That limitation makes you incapable of genuine forms of love, care, empathy, and sympathy to the point it is just something we're not capable of. We are very indifferent and uncaring individuals, they don't even acknowledge the difference between genuine vs cognitive training and treat them as if they are the same or don't use the words at all, and treat it like we can feel on the exact capacity as those without the disorder/make us seem all-feeling. It feels highly similar to "you just haven't met the right person to fix you," when just getting into a relationship will not suddenly make you less anti social. They all happen to be in very loving and fulfilling relationships, constantly saying things like how much they love their S/O's as well and that "they'd never hurt them." It's just so blatantly watering down the complexity of romantic relationships and makes everyone think you don't, and will not mistreat people as long as you love them enough. The thing with ASPD is you can only love as much as you can. You can't love to the full extent, what we feel as alot to us realistically isn't much/enough for a normal persons emotional tank. It's just that way to us, it's still very shallow. Realistically; we wear others down because our affection, and want to give it is beyond low. It isn't enough because normal everyday people who naturally have these things need more. We can't give that so we often get hostile about it. We wear them down to make it enough. It is abusive, we do very abusive things to others. Abuse is more broad than people will ever admit and honestly, I don't mind the fact people don't and take it for what it is. It's because everyone is so scared to hurt everyones feelings that they just think they're being accepting. It just makes these people easier targets.

With all due respect a lot of this sounds like a very you problem. While yes, emotions are shallow. The traditional sense of feeling or being in love doesn't exist. "Wearing people down" doesn't happen for everyone. We can't feel the same intensity if at all of romantic love our partners feel. But that does not inhibit romantic gestures being performed. You dont have to feel something in order to perform the gesture. Needs can still be met. The correct words can be said to satisfy the desire for closeness a partner may want. Abuse is unnecessary. Wearing someone down so that they will accept less bc you can't percieve a way to meet needs is a skill issue.

I think I hit a nail too close on it's head with this one.

Someone telling you that having a disorder does not equate to abuse isnt you getting it right. Its pointing out that having a disorder does not mean you get to be a piece of shit.

Oh yeah, I definitely got my point proven. We can all go home now, shows over.

Ah, your one of those

♡♡♡ thanks for the interactions and getting my notes up ♡♡♡

Tiktok ASPD makes no sense to me in the way they talk about romance. They want people to not see them badly so they just lightly word things as "it's not that Im incapable, it's just limited." That limitation makes you incapable of genuine forms of love, care, empathy, and sympathy to the point it is just something we're not capable of. We are very indifferent and uncaring individuals, they don't even acknowledge the difference between genuine vs cognitive training and treat them as if they are the same or don't use the words at all, and treat it like we can feel on the exact capacity as those without the disorder/make us seem all-feeling. It feels highly similar to "you just haven't met the right person to fix you," when just getting into a relationship will not suddenly make you less anti social. They all happen to be in very loving and fulfilling relationships, constantly saying things like how much they love their S/O's as well and that "they'd never hurt them." It's just so blatantly watering down the complexity of romantic relationships and makes everyone think you don't, and will not mistreat people as long as you love them enough. The thing with ASPD is you can only love as much as you can. You can't love to the full extent, what we feel as alot to us realistically isn't much/enough for a normal persons emotional tank. It's just that way to us, it's still very shallow. Realistically; we wear others down because our affection, and want to give it is beyond low. It isn't enough because normal everyday people who naturally have these things need more. We can't give that so we often get hostile about it. We wear them down to make it enough. It is abusive, we do very abusive things to others. Abuse is more broad than people will ever admit and honestly, I don't mind the fact people don't and take it for what it is. It's because everyone is so scared to hurt everyones feelings that they just think they're being accepting. It just makes these people easier targets.

With all due respect a lot of this sounds like a very you problem. While yes, emotions are shallow. The traditional sense of feeling or being in love doesn't exist. "Wearing people down" doesn't happen for everyone. We can't feel the same intensity if at all of romantic love our partners feel. But that does not inhibit romantic gestures being performed. You dont have to feel something in order to perform the gesture. Needs can still be met. The correct words can be said to satisfy the desire for closeness a partner may want. Abuse is unnecessary. Wearing someone down so that they will accept less bc you can't percieve a way to meet needs is a skill issue.

I think I hit a nail too close on it's head with this one.

Someone telling you that having a disorder does not equate to abuse isnt you getting it right. Its pointing out that having a disorder does not mean you get to be a piece of shit.

Oh yeah, I definitely got my point proven. We can all go home now, shows over.

Tiktok ASPD makes no sense to me in the way they talk about romance. They want people to not see them badly so they just lightly word things as "it's not that Im incapable, it's just limited." That limitation makes you incapable of genuine forms of love, care, empathy, and sympathy to the point it is just something we're not capable of. We are very indifferent and uncaring individuals, they don't even acknowledge the difference between genuine vs cognitive training and treat them as if they are the same or don't use the words at all, and treat it like we can feel on the exact capacity as those without the disorder/make us seem all-feeling. It feels highly similar to "you just haven't met the right person to fix you," when just getting into a relationship will not suddenly make you less anti social. They all happen to be in very loving and fulfilling relationships, constantly saying things like how much they love their S/O's as well and that "they'd never hurt them." It's just so blatantly watering down the complexity of romantic relationships and makes everyone think you don't, and will not mistreat people as long as you love them enough. The thing with ASPD is you can only love as much as you can. You can't love to the full extent, what we feel as alot to us realistically isn't much/enough for a normal persons emotional tank. It's just that way to us, it's still very shallow. Realistically; we wear others down because our affection, and want to give it is beyond low. It isn't enough because normal everyday people who naturally have these things need more. We can't give that so we often get hostile about it. We wear them down to make it enough. It is abusive, we do very abusive things to others. Abuse is more broad than people will ever admit and honestly, I don't mind the fact people don't and take it for what it is. It's because everyone is so scared to hurt everyones feelings that they just think they're being accepting. It just makes these people easier targets.

With all due respect a lot of this sounds like a very you problem. While yes, emotions are shallow. The traditional sense of feeling or being in love doesn't exist. "Wearing people down" doesn't happen for everyone. We can't feel the same intensity if at all of romantic love our partners feel. But that does not inhibit romantic gestures being performed. You dont have to feel something in order to perform the gesture. Needs can still be met. The correct words can be said to satisfy the desire for closeness a partner may want. Abuse is unnecessary. Wearing someone down so that they will accept less bc you can't percieve a way to meet needs is a skill issue.

I think I hit a nail too close on it's head with this one.

I can't stress enough how much I don't care about the talking point we've coughed up on ASPD that: "it was a study only done on criminals and there fore it's bad." Because it really doesn't matter to me. This actually proves further the fact people don't like mental health if it's not digestible to them if you ask me. It bugs me/effects me zero that there's study work on criminals, are they suddenly not people? Are they not allowed to have mental issues? Are you not allowed to be a bad person and mentally ill OR a bad person because of the effects of your mental illness? Because it genuinely has no impact on my life or my treatment how these things came to be. Nor these people that don't even exist to me that are in jail for whatever reason. Theres all kinds of bad people with other disorders in jail that are also taken into account in study, It's not just ASPD. We're just so picky and sensitive that we act like everything has to like anxiety or PTSD if it's gonna be a disorder. Bad people, horrific people, some of the worst people you can think are probably disordered and just not diagnosed. Because it's not normal behavior, it's disordered and it puts you off for that reason. It doesn't mean you can armchair diagnose them, but I want more people to be open to the fact that its an illness and is known as a disorder for a reason. There's gonna be not good people in everything, but especially disorder spaces. I genuinely don't think we should care as much as we try to act like we do about this study. People only mention it to look like they care about us, because that's the only time they can bring it up. It's to look better by going "well I don't think you're bad because you haven't gone to jail. Not everyone is like that" And if someone did?... and I didn't?... I still wouldn't care. You people act like the criteria says you HAVE to be arrested to get diagnosed, it's "failure to conform to social norms concerning lawful behaviors, such as performing acts that are grounds for arrest." You don't have to actively be in jail, have gone to jail, are awaiting jail, ect to get diagnosed. You guys act like it's in the wording and it's physically not.

I think people say this because they're like "well they modeled the symptoms after people in their worst moments! So it's not accurate to ASPD as a whole." I personally don't know much about the study, thats just what I always heard people say and use as explanation. I absolutely entirely agree with your post anyway and I do think there could be a dehumanization aspect to it. Ofc since they're criminals they're all insane and therefore it's just not accurate at all then right 💀. And yeah its not bad or crazy to acknowledge the likelier criminality with ASPD like.... hmm. It's gonna happen.

The only people that hate the ASPD diagnostic criteria and are actually diagnosed, only think it's "making us look bad" is because they feel exposed and outted by it. They don't think that way genuinely, they just feel very exposed and are acting out because of that. Which is actually, very in character for the disorder.

That about proves my point

I'm crying why are you talking to me like a cartoon villain there's NO way you're being serious. This is clearly not in good faith so I'm just not gonna respond anymore, you can and get my notes up though, I appreciate the engagement.

The only people that hate the ASPD diagnostic criteria and are actually diagnosed, only think it's "making us look bad" is because they feel exposed and outted by it. They don't think that way genuinely, they just feel very exposed and are acting out because of that. Which is actually, very in character for the disorder.

That about proves my point