Ya know, when I first watched Captain America: The Winter Soldier, and it was revealed that Bucky was TWS and wow omg what?! Because I hadn’t read any of the comics so yeah it was a super surprise for me. As I kept watching this man who used to be Steve Rogers ‘best friend’ (read as:secret boyfriend) who was a great man as we saw him in TFA, now turned into this mindless killing machine. A weapon. The muscle. The new fist of hydra. I first through of him as a robot basically, that they’d just keep on ice until needed again, then program the mission into, and press go. But the more his story line progressed and you see him very subtlety becoming more human like, from the moment Steve said “Bucky??” For the first time on the bridge, I noticed something. He’s not a robot. Robots have no emotion whatsoever. But TWS had emotion. He’s just been brainwashed to the point of being able to keep most of his emotions obsolete and more or less nonexistent. Fast forward a bit to Captain America: Civil War, and he’s obviously much more like a human, just not so much “Bucky” yet. And you watch him throughout the movie trying to regain some semblance of what he thinks he was or should be. And then you get to the interaction with he and tony, “Do you even remember them?” “I remember all of them.” And that.. Fucking THAT. Right there. It killed me so much. Remembering back to how I’d previously viewed him, now rather than seeing a “robot” that just looked human and did its job in TWS, I could now only see him as a broken, bruised and damaged man being held captive by his own mind. Like being possessed. The real Bucky Barnes was still in there, trapped inside the mind of the “Asset” but with no way to get out. No way to control himself because he’s been trained and taught to only obey orders or face the consequences and be tortured and scrambled until there was nothing left but a silent onlooker in the mind of The Winter Soldier. So yeah he remembers all of them. Because he was there. He knew what was happening but was completely helpless in being able to stop it. Because he wasn’t much more than still small itch in the subconscious of a monster. That is, until Steve said his name and that still small itch became a memory of an echo of a voice trying to break free that only became louder. But THATS another story for another post.