Why Won't This Cocking Cucumber Behave?

hitting return early on libby when there's people waiting and feeling like a benevolent queen distributing alms to the poor

"for my own sanity, i'm going to stop thinking about this!" ← person who's going to think about it all the time forever

pillows have stopped having a cold side some time ago

you can experience life altering devastating emotion and then your cat will throw up next to you & look at you like does this help ?

Our age of strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is collapsing

i often feel like a dog that's been tasked with paperwork

when i reblog something for a mutual and they reblog it from somewhere else #WELCOMEHOMECHEATER

i’ve been having a rough day for about 5 years now

this is the restrained version of me. i could be much worse.

being called an old soul when you were kid and knowing you just got diagnosed as a weird cunt

Could really use $12000 and an orgasm right now