Here’s a transcript, if anyone wants to know what they’re talking about:
Question: Only 1.5% of trees in German forests are
A - fir trees B - oak trees C - spruces or D - beech?
MN: Let’s do this… with a.
GJ: A… fir trees. Ok. I’m just gonna tell you now, I would have never gone for A. The entire Black Forest, everything, wherever you- it’s all fir trees (Christmas trees), everywhere! And oak trees and beech trees are such beautiful, rare trees, I mean the parquet alone, how much that costs-
(audience laughs)
(Neuer sighs)
(Gabi Köster looks distressed)
GJ: So… spruces, oak trees, beech trees and fir trees … only 1.5% of trees in German forests are… FIR TREES!
(Maite Kelly loses her damn mind and starts screaming)
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“… and Bastian Schweinsteiger is exiting the field, and he gives his captain duties to— Manuel Neuer! The goalie that gained so much dislike from the start is now leading the red giants to their winning streak! Captain Manuel Neuer!”
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I want to scream at thomas PLEASE manu is not that funny! But it's ok he's in love
On Fußballgott Franz Beckenbauer this is every Neuller interaction these days:
I love that Thomas seems to hang on every word Manu says and laugh at all of his silly little dad jokes whenever they come. Manu isn’t much of a talker, but whenever he has something to say, Thomas always listens. I love that about them 🥰
It’s crazy, because I used to think Manu wasn’t that funny, but that was before I realized his sense of humor is just drier than the Sahara Desert 😂 and now I love it. Here’s some of his greatest hits (note: a lot of these are old, but that’s because young Manu was an absolute menace lmao):
2 photos by @thomas-mueller
8 photos by @miroslavs
4 photos by @lewypool
Favorite Manuel Neuer (+camel) quotes.
Do you remember? Manuel Neuer about his drug test.
The many adventures of Manuel Neuer
→ Manu vs. an annoying reporter. (x)
Video by @imakarmabutterfly
“Where are they going?”
Video by @imakarmabutterfly
Video by @imakarmabutterfly
The ball was there! - you’ll find the full translation in the comments, but this is the best part
The Coke Zero commercial - still can’t believe he got snubbed at the Oscars after dropping this gem - also, definitely search up “Manuel Neuer Werbung” on YouTube if you need a laugh; his acting does not improve
A journalist asks if the 1-1 draw was Manu’s fault and Manu asks him point blank “are you fucking with me?”
Manu dancing because of course it needed a mention
Nutella and Manu: the ultimate Romeo and Juliet
Honestly every time Manu’s ever been drunk (though the 2013 triple celebration was a standout - Manu’s introduction and entrance is at around 8:05)
“In the best hands 😂”
“Guys! I have to get to rehab…” (it’s the thought bubble for me lmao)
No thots just Manu’s hell yeah socks because our goatkeeper is a fashionista (we already know this diva)
And last but not least, whatever tf this was 😂
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