sluggin’ it

Eating another can of sardines. People are too fucking scared to talk to me. Heh. Can't say I blame em...

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

I mean if you're stranded at sea and you do kill a seagull with a golf ball and it lands on the deck and you don't have any water you COULD drink its blood for hydration but you run the risk of losing more water if it makes you too nauseous, and you would get more hydrated just eating the meat. If has bird flu you're fucked tho.

of course any sailor could tell you "don't kill a seagull it's bad luck" but personally if a sailor told me that while I hucked another wilson soft at a screaming airborne beach menace I would probably not handle the advice too well. I would most likely not take it with a lot of patience if I'm being fully honest

Id use my fantastic machine that turns blood into water.

it's always the fantastic blood machine with this guy

We should popularize more hispanized phonetic spellings of classic character names like we did with esnupi

quirky fourth wall breaking character but theyre just fucking. wrong about the medium theyre in. they keep making references to cinematic techniques and directorial styles and the other fourth wall breaking character is like "dumbass we're in a fucking comic book" and they are in a video game.

Well currently they’re in a tumblr post but I see your point

all the “peer pressure is bad” education we give kids is practically useless because all it cares about is telling them that Drugs Are Evil rather than the much more useful lesson of ‘the person who responds to you saying you don’t drink by telling you they’ll find a way to get you to is also going to be shitty about all your other boundaries’.

god forbid you teach kids that their consent should be respected rather than about the inherent immorality of all the sinful actions of their peers

I used to block people who called Pangur ugly, until she reached about 8 years old, and then I was like yeah okay I see it now

saw someone including "Mandate of Heaven" as one of those christian terms tumblr likes to use to sound profound. which i get where you're coming from but t☝️hat one is chinese

can I make a confession that might get me in trouble