I Eat Everything

i have seen this post on my dash 7 times now and every time i think more loudly, 'this is what Batman villain The Penguin's dialogue sounds like when they let him be fun to watch.'

#Children’s media used to be about making you feel the entire depth and breadth of the human emotional spectrum#All while your 7 y/o brain struggled to make sense of if all. But it was like an emotional vaccine#Comprehending loss at that age didn’t make it any easier to bear with age. But atleast it was familiar (conserving these tags by @jonairadreaming because yes)

Instead of people rushing for it, I imagine people sprinting at break-neck speed away, and it becomes a game of dodgeball instead.

the tension between the genuine cleverness of the joke and the incompetence implied by putting it on two-sentence horror is what makes this for me

Things feel even crazier if you name the Gerbils.