Life, the Universe, and Bullshit

The reason was because I already knew that I already had an immortal soul, and it was going to Hell, and it would be a hundred times worse than the pain I’d feel when the sun exploded. 

Me, using an oven mitt as a trivet

I'll be scrolling through my phone and see something so annoying that I'll go into a defensive smile, and my family/coworkers/patrons will be all 'oh my gosh she smiles' and insist of seeing whatever set it off.

It meant that they get an ending, they don’t just drop off the face of the earth never to be heard from again. If a story ends it means I got to see it completed in my lifetime, and I’m happy about that. 

5. VICTORY 

I had to play Taako and I accidentally killed the entire party with an out-of-control fireball.

if i'd had to get a corporate job i'd've died