too shy to say, but I hope you stay

You stopped in front of the doorway to your sister’s bedroom, seeing your dad reading your two younger sisters a bedtime story. You saw how he was cuddling them at the same time he was reading to them. You leaned against the doorway and crossed your arms, wondering when the last your dad cuddled you like that. It’s been a long time since your dad held you like that. You were standing in the doorway a moment before your dad noticed that you were there. He softly smiles at you.

“Hey, kid.” Bucky greets you.

“Hey, dad.” You greeted him.

“Are you alright?” He asks softly.

“Yes.” You answered.

You gave him a soft smile before going back to your bedroom to study. Bucky could sense that something was off with you by the way you said yes. If you’re being honest, you’re exhausted and on top of that, two girls at school are being rude to you, but you didn’t tell him that. You just don’t want to worry him and your mom is all. You sat back down at your desk, sighing before going back to study. After putting your sisters to bed, your dad went down the hall to your bedroom. He saw you at your desk studying with your head propped against your free hand. He could tell how tired you are just by looking at you. He knocked on the door a couple times to get your attention. You turned around to see him standing in the doorway.

“Oh, hey, dad.” You say.

“Hey, kiddo. I just put your sisters to bed and I wanted to see what you’re up to.” Bucky says.

“Studying like usual.” You say.

Bucky nods and walks further into your bedroom. He looks down at your desk to see what you’re studying. He picks up the textbook to get a good look at it.

“I’m assuming this is the test you’re studying for.” He says.

“It is.” You confirmed.

“Well, don’t let me get in your way. Let me know if you need anything.” He says.

“Ok.” You say.

You went back to studying as your dad left your bedroom. He stood in the doorway for a moment, watching you to make sure you’re ok. Then he left your room.

A few days later, the day of the test you were studying for, your dad was dropping you and your sisters off at school when he noticed how quiet you are. You’re never quiet in the car. That worried him.

“You ok?” Bucky asks again.

“I’m fine.” You say.

“Nervous for the test?” You asked.

“Yea.” You say.

Your sisters got dropped off at school first and then you did.

“Have a good day at school. Good luck on your test.” He says.

You gave him a soft smile before getting out of the car. Bucky watches you walk up to the school. He knows something is going on with you. He just wants to know what it is so he can help you. He sighs to himself before driving out of the school’s drop off line and going home. As you were walking to your first class of the day, the two girls who are always rude to you saw you and walked over to you. You just sighed and kept walking.

“Good morning.” They say, pretending to be cheerful.

You didn’t say it back. You just kept walking and tried to ignore them.

“It’s rude to not respond to someone when they’re talking to you.” One of the girls say.

You still ignoring them. That earned you a smack on the back of your head. You rubbed the back of your head as you looked at them.

“Are you gonna say it back or what?” One of the girls asks.

“Morning.” You say.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” The second girl says in a mocking tone.

One of the girls put her hand on your shoulder like she was going to give you a friendly pat on your shoulder, but she didn’t. She just shoves you into the wall before walking away with the other girl, giggling as they walked away. You just stood there for a second. You inhaled deeply and sighed before going to class. Those two girls didn’t stop there. They continued to pick on you throughout the school day. They got ruder and ruder if it’s even possible. It took everything to ignore them. You still didn’t tell your parents about it. You just shoved it deep down.

One day, your day was drive by your school to pick you up. He saw those two girls messing with you. Specifically, pushing you around and laughing as they did so. Then they shoved you hard, which made you fall to the ground. Bucky’s jaw clenches at what he just saw them do to you. He quickly parked his car and rushed over to you. A teacher was talking to the two girls. He crouches down to check on you and help you.

“Are you ok, doll?” Bucky asks softly.

You looked at him with teary eyes. He saw a cut on your lip and you holding your left arm. That told him that you’re not ok.

“You’re going to be ok.” He says softly as he helped you up.

Before leaving, he walked over to the teacher to talk to her.

“I really hope that you’re going to punish those girls for what they did to my daughter.” Bucky says.

“I am, Mr. Barnes. I’m going to call their parents and suspend them.” The teacher says.

“Good.” He says, narrowing his eyes at the two girls.

Bucky wraps his arms around you and lead you to the car. He turns to you after you two got in the car and takes another look at your injuries. You hissed when he touched your left arm.

“I’m taking you to the ER.” Bucky says.

“No! I want to go home!” You say.

“I know you do, but we have to make sure that your arm isn’t broken first.” He says.

You whined. Bucky took you straight to the emergency room. He stayed with you the whole time.

“I want to go home.” You say for like the tenth time.

“I know you do, doll. Let’s see what the doctor says about your arm and then we can go home.” He says.

You sighed and leaned back against the emergency room bed, still holding your left arm. The doctor came into the room a moment later.

“Good news is your arm isn’t broken or fractured. The bad news is your arm is sprained and you need to wear a sling for a while.” The doctor says.

The doctor put the sling on you and adjusts it.

“Aspirin and icing it will help with the pain.” The doctor says.

“Thank you.” Bucky says.

“You’re welcome.” She says.

Bucky wraps his arms around you again as he led you to the car. You were quiet on the car ride home. He looks at you at every red light with a sad look on his face. He wants to know what’s going on with you. Not only that, he wants to know why you didn’t try to tell the two girls to stop bullying you. He knows you’re not a violent person. He wants to know why you didn’t try to solve it out.

When you guys got home, he helped you get settled in. Then he got the first aid kit from the bathroom and patched up the cut on your lip. Bucky was gentle as he cleaned and patched up your lip. You hissed and flinched away when the alcohol got in the cut.

“Why didn’t you tell those girls to stop bullying you?” Bucky asks.

“I didn’t want it to escalate to violence.” You say.

“I know you’re not a violent person and I taught you self defense, which you could’ve used in that situation.” He says.

“I know.” You mumbled.

“Then why didn’t you?” He asks.

You just shrugged your shoulders.

“I need a better answer than that, kiddo.” He says.

Bucky saw your eyes tear up and your bottom lip quiver. He immediately wrapped his arms around you when you started crying.

“I wanted to stop them, but I was just too exhausted to do anything!” You cried.

“Why didn’t you tell me and your mom?” He asks.

“You guys are always busy taking care of Izzy and Daisy. I didn’t want to worry you guys and become a burden to you guys.” You say.

“Never say that about yourself again. You are anything but a burden, doll. You’re my baby girl and you always will be.” He says softly.

You cried and cried more. Bucky’s heart broke for you. He hates seeing you like this. He kept telling you that it’s going to be ok as he tried to get you to stop crying. His hand rubbed your back, which is something he does to help you and your sisters calm down when you guys are upset and it still works. You stopped crying after a few minutes. Bucky didn’t stop holding you. He was holding you like he was holding your sisters the other night.

“You don’t know how much I missed this, dad.” You say after a few more minutes.

“Yea, me too.” Bucky almost whispers. “That’s why you stood at the doorframe watching us a few days ago. I thought you didn’t want this anymore. Well, I was wrong. I’m so sorry.” He says softly.

“It’s ok. You didn’t know. Besides, I always thought that I was too old to be cuddled by my parents when I turned 18.” You say.

“You’re never too old for anything, kiddo. If you want cuddles from your parents, we’ll be more than happy to cuddle you. Like I said, you’ll always be our baby girl.” He says softly and kisses the top of your head.

You feel asleep on the couch after a little bit. You’re still in your dad’s arms, which is where you exactly want to be. Bucky looks down at you with a smile on his face and kisses the top of your head. Your sisters came into the living room after they got ready for bed to say goodnight to you and Bucky.

“We know Y/N is sleeping, but we want to say night and hug her.” Izzy says.

“Just be careful. She got hurt this afternoon.” Bucky says.

“We will.” Daisy says.

You woke up when you felt two small pairs of arms around you. You opened your eyes and saw your sisters hugging you.

“Night.” Both of them say at the same time.

“Night.” You say.

You went back to sleep and your sisters went to their bedrooms. Your dad went to go read them a bedtime story. Your mom came home a little bit later. Your dad greets her at the door and gives her a hug and a kiss.

“We missed you while you were gone.” Bucky says.

“I missed you guys too. How was everything while I was gone?” Your mom asks.

Bucky sighs before saying anything. That’s when your mom got worried.

“What happened? Did something happen with the kids?” She asks with concern in her voice.

“Izzy and Daisy are fine. Something has been going on with Y/N lately.” He says.

“What is it?” She asks.

“She was getting bullied by two girls at school and when I picked her up from school today, they were pushing her around, which made her fall down and sprain her left arm and cut her lip. She’s also really exhausted. She didn’t want to tell us, because she didn’t want to worry us and be a burden.” He tells her.

“Our poor baby.” She says, her eyes tearing up.

“She’s sleeping on the couch right now.” He says.

Your mom went to the living room to see you sound asleep on the couch. She still had a worried look on her face as she looked at you.

“Y/N will be alright. She just needs to sleep right now.” Bucky says softly.

“You’re right. Our daughters are strong.” Your mom says.

“They get it from you.” He says softly.

“That’s all you, honey.” She says.

“Agree to disagree?” He asks.

“Sounds good to me.” She says.

Your mom gives your dad a kiss before helping him get you settled in bed. They gave you a kiss on your forehead before going to bed. The next morning, you woke up and went to the kitchen to see that your mom is home. You smiled when you saw her.

“You’re home.” You smiled.

“I am.” Your mom smiles.

Your mom walked over to you and gave you a hug. She was careful to not accidentally bump your sprained arm. Then she looked at you with a softened expression on her face.

“Dad told me what happened yesterday.” She says.

“He did?” You asked.

“Yes and I’m sorry you went through all of that. I’m also sorry that I wasn’t here to help you.” She says softly.

“It’s ok. Dad, helped me get through it.” You say.

“I’m glad he did.” She says.

“Like we said last night, our daughters are strong.” Bucky chimes in as he walks into the kitchen.

You and your mom smiled at your dad as he walked over to you guys and hugged both of you.

“We want you to know that you’ll never be a burden to us. We love you more than anything in this world, sweetie. No matter how old you are, you’ll always be our baby girl.” Your mom says.

“I love you guys too.” You smiled.

You barely made it to the couch before you collapsed, groaning as you buried your face in the cushion. You only lifted your head to breathe and check your phone when it went off. A smile touched your lips when you sat that Bucky texted you. 

No matter how rough the days were, your boyfriend was a bright spot.

“Barely heard from you today, sweetheart. You okay?”

Your heart sank when you scrolled through the chat. You usually sent him memes or gifs that you knew would make him laugh, along with sweet messages to let him know you were thinking of him. Today you hardly sent a thing with everything going on.

It was touching that he noticed something was off.

“Rough day. Sorry I worried you.”

You curled up with a yawn, the phone resting beside you.

“Just resting my eyes,” you mumbled.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed when the familiar rumble of a motorcycle engine cut through the quiet of your apartment, making you sit up slowly. Your heart fluttered, not needing to look out the window because you knew exactly who was there. One of your favorite people.

Bucky.

Your Bucky.

The sudden knock at the door sounded impatient as you stood up and stretched. You almost laughed when the knock continued, louder and more persistent. Maybe it was time to give him a key.

You barely got the door open before Bucky pushed his way inside, forcing you to step back as he kicked the door shut without taking his eyes off you. Your breath rushed out of your lungs when you looked him over. The sight of him in a leather jacket always did something to you.

But the crease between his brows pushed the excitement away. 

“Bucky?” you asked.

A small sound left your mouth when he wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you against him. His other hand came up to cradle the back of your head, his hold protective and tender. It felt like your feet weren’t on the ground. 

“I’m here,” he answered, his voice rough and low. “I’ve got you.”

You felt his heart beat against you steadily, grounding you as your fingers curled in his jacket. The scent of leather and cologne filled your nostrils as you took a deep breath. Your eyes burned suddenly when he held you tighter, almost like he was giving you permission to fall apart if you wanted to. It wasn’t just a hug.

It was exactly what you needed without realizing it.

“I’ve got you,” he said again, his lips touching your temple.

You didn’t break down, but you did sniffle.

“Today sucked,” you said, proud of yourself for not pouting.

It sounded ridiculous. Bucky had lived through years of torture, brainwashing and more. You hadn’t experienced even a tenth of the pain he endured and you were whining about-

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he said sincerely, rubbing your back soothingly. He never invalidated your feelings. “I’ll listen if you wanna talk about it, or I can punch something or someone if it makes you feel better.”

You let out a watery laugh. “No punching,” you said, pulling back far enough to look at him. “Did you really speed all the way here because I said I had a rough day? I know you sped.”

“I may have.” The small smile on his face made you smile. “You tell me something like that and you think I won’t drop everything to get to you?”

Your heart skipped a beat. No other boyfriend dropped whatever they were doing to get to you in the past. But Bucky always managed to find ways to put you first. The male species could learn a thing or two from him.

“You were probably busy,” you guessed.

“Doesn’t matter. Nothing’s more important than you.”

Your eyes burned again, but you blinked the tears away. “Thank you.”

The corners of his eyes crinkled. “You don’t have to thank me for showing up,” he said, grasping your chin carefully. “Can I do one more thing?”

His mouth found yours before you finished nodding.

It wasn’t a rushed or hungry kiss. It was something warm and impossibly gentle, like the grip on your chin, a kind of kiss that resonated in your core. He deepened it, like he needed a reminder that you were real and safe as he comforted you. 

It felt like love.

His forehead rested against yours when he broke the kiss. “Did that help at all?” he asked, his breath ghosting your lips and thumb stroking your chin.

“More than you know,” you murmured, leaning into him. 

“Good.” He pressed another soft kiss to the corner of your mouth. “Did you eat?”

Your silence answered that question.

He sighed, not waiting for permission as he walked you backward toward your couch. “I’m ordering your favorite,” he said, pulling you onto his lap once he took a seat. His jacket was still on. “And I’m gonna hold you until it gets here, feed you if you let me, and do whatever you want for the rest of the night.”

You settled into him, your body truly relaxing this time. “Even watch a bad romcom?” you asked, still in awe of how much he wanted to take care of you.

He rested his chin on your shoulder. “If that’s what helps.”

“Getting a hug and kiss from you did wonders,” you said honestly.

Knowing that someone saw you made a world of difference. 

“Wonders, huh? Didn’t know I was that powerful,” he teased, taking out his phone to order.

You giggled and titled your head a bit. “You didn’t tell me about your day.”

“I got to see you,” he said, smiling gently. “So it’s a good day.”

And being in Bucky’s arms made your day much better.

I know a hug and kiss from Bucky would help me, okay? Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

You’re parents don’t fight often. When they do, it’s mostly disagreements, which they’re able to talk out. Out of all days for your parents to get into a fight, it was on the day of their wedding anniversary. Your younger sisters knew that they were fighting. It was over something stupid. They’ve heard it all day. They’re just hoping that they’ll talk everything out. Their moods brightened up when they saw your car pull into the driveway. You looked up at the window they’re looking out of as soon as you got out of your car. You smiled when you saw them waving at you. You waved back. You got the presents and cake you got your parents for their wedding anniversary and then walked up to the house. Your sisters opened the door before you even got to it and greeted you with hugs.

“We missed you.” Jamie says.

“You guys saw me a couple days ago.” You giggled.

“That feels like forever ago.” Grace says.

You giggled again as you followed them inside of the house. Your heart immediately drops to the pit of your stomach when you heard your parents fighting in the kitchen.

“Why are mom and dad fighting?” You asked your sisters.

“We don’t know. They’ve been fighting since this morning.” Jamie says.

“About what?” You asked.

“Something stupid.” Grace says.

“Well, hopefully they’ll talk it out and we can celebrate their wedding anniversary.” You say.

“Hopefully.” Jamie and Grace say at the same time.

You went into the kitchen to greet your parents. They didn’t even notice you were there. That’s how bad the fight is. You stood there for a moment, watching your parents fight before saying something.

“Mom? Dad?” You say, trying to get their attention.

They didn’t hear you.

“Mom? Dad?” You say a bit louder.

They heard you that time.

“Not now!” Your parents snapped at you.

You flinched and your eyes teared up when they snapped at you. They’ve never snapped at you. You’ve never given them a reason to.

“Sorry.” You mumbled under your breath.

You set their cake and presents on the table before leaving. Jamie and Grace saw you leaving and ran after you.

“Where are you going? You just got here.” Jamie asks.

You didn’t say anything. You got in your car and drove off. Your sisters watched you drive off till they couldn’t see your car anymore. They went back inside of the house with saddened looks on their faces. They went to the living room and sat down on the couch, slouching back against it. Your parent’s fight went on for a bit longer before it came to a stop. Your sisters were relieved for that, but they’re upset that you left.

“Where’s your sister? I thought she was coming over.” Bucky asks.

“She did.” Jamie says.

“When? We didn’t see her.” Your mom says.

“A few minutes ago, but she just left, because you two snapped at her.” Grace says.

“She put your cake and presents on the table.” Jamie says.

Your parents looked over at the table, seeing the cake and presents. They looked at what you brought over for a few seconds before opening the presents. Then they opened an envelope that contains a sweet note and plane tickets to Italy.

Happy wedding anniversary, mom and dad! You guys have been talking about wanting to go to Italy for so long that I saved up some money to buy you plane tickets for you two to go there on your wedding anniversary. I hope you guys have lots of fun while you’re there.

Love, Y/N

“Y/N told us that she wanted to do something special for you guys for your wedding anniversary this year, but you guys ruined it by snapping at her.” Grace says.

“We didn’t know.” Your mom says.

“Of course you guys didn’t, because you two couldn’t stop fighting long enough to even acknowledge that she was even here.” Jaime says.

Your parents looked at the plane tickets to Italy again before looking at each other.

“She probably hates us now.” Your mom says.

Your parents tried calling and texting you, but you didn’t answer them. You were too upset with them to answer them. When you got to your apartment, you closed and locked the door behind you. You tossed your keys onto the table and went straight to your bedroom. You laid down on your bed and started crying into your pillow. You screamed into your pillow. You couldn’t help it. That’s how upset and exhausted you are. Your phone kept ringing with calls and texts from your parents. You still didn’t answer any of them.

“Doll, please answer your phone.” Bucky says, leaving you another voicemail.

“Is she answering any of your calls and texts?” Your mom asks.

“No.” He answers.

“What are we going to do if our daughter never talks to us again?” She asks.

“I wouldn’t go that far, sweetheart.” He says, wrapping his arms around her.

“What are we going to do then?” She asks, leaning her head against his chest.

“I don’t know, but we’ll figure something out. We always do when our girls are upset.” He says softly.

->->->

A few days go by since your parents snapped at you on their wedding anniversary. You’re still upset with them. You’re still not answering any of their calls and texts. You’ve been off of work all week to breathe. When that weekend came, you woke up to the sound of your parents whispering. You stretched and rubbed your eyes before getting out of bed. You went to the kitchen to see your parents making your favorite breakfast.

“What are you guys doing here?” You asked, your voice a bit hoarse from waking up.

“This is our way of apologizing for snapping at you on our wedding anniversary.” Your mom says.

“We shouldn’t have done that. We were just too caught up in the fight that we didn’t even think about you and your feelings.” Bucky says.

You didn’t say anything. You just sat down at the table, not looking at them anymore. Your parents brought over a plate of your favorite breakfast, setting it in front of you on the table. Then your parents sat down on either side of you.

“We opened the presents you got us for our wedding anniversary.” Bucky says.

“I got you guys something special, but you guys ruined it by snapping at me.” You say, your voice cracking.

“We’re sorry. We didn’t mean to snap at you. We don’t want you to be upset with anymore. Please, sweetie.” Your mom says.

You slouched back in the chair. Your eyes teared up and your bottom lip quivered.

“Oh, doll.” Bucky whispers.

Your parents moved closer to you and wrapped their arms around you as you started crying.

“Please forgive us.” Bucky says.

“I do forgive you guys. I just didn’t like it when you guys snapped at me.” You say.

“We’re so sorry, sweetie.” Your mom apologizes again.

You sniffled and looked at your parents.

“What did you guys think of your presents?” You asked.

“We love all of them.” Your mom smiles.

“Especially the trip to Italy.” Bucky smiles.

“I’m glad you guys love it. I wanted to do something special for your wedding anniversary.” You say.

“Even if you and your sisters didn’t get us anything for our wedding anniversary, you girls will always be our something special.” Your mom says.

You smiled and hugged your parents.

“We love you and your sisters more than anything.” Bucky says.

“I love you guys too.” You say.

“Now, eat your breakfast before it gets cold.” Your mom says.

You couldn’t deny your favorite breakfast, especially if your parents made it. They made it with love and as an apology. That’s how sorry they are. Your parents made mental notes to themselves to try not to snap at you or your sisters the next time they fight.

Your friendship with Bucky was not automatic by any means. He is the way he is, so of course he was guarded, closed off, constant grump face. Slowly, you chipped away at his walls. You were yourself to a fault, and Bucky couldn’t help being sucked into your orbit.

He became looser around you—he’d crack a dry joke instead of just grunting in response, he let himself smile instead of pretending your jokes annoyed him.

Your bond grew over time—small jokes became easy banter, smiles became full laughs. You got to see his charming goofy side, and he got to see your quiet soft side. Late night talks on the balcony overlooking the lake—learning about each other’s deepest struggles, happiest memories, biggest fears.

You two became very close. Always looking out for one another, knowing when the other is feeling off. You were never bored when together, even if you’re just in the same room doing separate tasks. Sure you could annoy the crap out of each other, but you’d also be protective and caring for each other at the same moment.

On bad nights, you two would find solace in each other’s rooms. Bucky had more of those night than you. Tonight wasn’t even that bad—you just didn’t want to be alone.

You wrap your favorite blanket around your shoulders, and quietly shuffle down the hallway to his room. It’s not late, but you still knock softly just in case he could actually sleep tonight.

Bucky is propped up against his headboard reading ‘The Great Gatsby’, he’s been trying to read the modern classics he’s missed out on. His gaze lifts to the door, immediately he knew it was your knock.

“Come in,” he calls out, lowering the book with a thumb holding his place. He can tell when you open the door you aren’t feeling quite yourself.

“Can I just lay in here? I don’t need to talk, just don’t feel like being alone,” you ask. Holding your blanket securely around you.

“Come here,” his voice already becoming the gentle version, for when you’re like this. He sets his book on the nightstand, then lifts the covers for you to climb in.

“Thank you,” you say, gently nudging the door shut, then crossing the room to your designated side of his bed. You slide under the covers—nestling your head into the pillow.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, while he drapes your blanket on top of you.

“I just feel… off.” While you speak, he shifts to lie down on his side. His gaze is devoted to yours—trying to be see whatever you feel. “My period is in a couple of days. You know how I can get.” You shrug.

Bucky does know how hard it can be on you sometimes. It breaks his heart seeing you like this. He tried his best to learn what helps you during this monthly depressive episode. Usually it’s just support to get through it.

“I’m sorry, doll,” he says softly. He tugs the covers further up on you, before resting his hand on your shoulder.

“I’m okay. I just wanted to be with you,” you give him a soft smile. His eyes soften even more, and his thumb begins rubbing circles over the fabric of your shirt.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks, no pressure in his tone, just care.

“Not really. You keep reading. I’m just gonna sleep, if that’s okay?”

“Whatever you need, sweetheart,” his hand gently squeezes your shoulder.

“Thank you, Buck.” You already feel relief from the dark cloud that settled over you. Bucky leans over to place a kiss on your head. You huff air from your nose, and a small teasing smile pulls your lips. “Dork,” you murmur as a term of endearment.

“Weirdo,” he replies as usual. Smiling softly, feeling a little better that you still have some teasing in you.

Bucky adjusts back to his sitting position, and resumes his book. He looks over at you snuggling deeper into the bed.

“The light not gonna bother you?” He asks, voice a juxtaposition of rough and soft.

“Doesn’t bother me at all. Plus, your big head is blocking it pretty well,” you tease softly, a small lazy smile pulls my mouth.

“You’re a punk,” he huffs in amusement, shaking his head. You chuckle softly.

Every couple of minutes Bucky notices you move just a hair closer to him—a shift of your leg or subtle move of your hand. Whether you’re conscious of it or not, he doesn’t know.

Bucky looks over—you’re curled up facing him, forehead only a few inches from his elbow. He smiles softly to himself. He scoots further down the pillows—so he’s mostly lying now. He reaches his human arm, the one closest to you, over to pull you into his side.

You crack your eyes open, when you feel his hand pressed against your back. He gives you a soft knowing smile. A sleepy smile grows on your face, then you scoot completely into his side—head on his shoulder, right arm draping over his torso.

He hears the content exhale as your body relaxes. He cranes his neck to see your eyes are already closed again, hints of your sleepy smile still remain. He feels his chest tighten with affection for you. He wants to wrap you up in a cocoon of blankets, hold you tight in the safety of his arms, and plant kisses all over your cute sleepy face.

Instead he just savors what he has been given. Relishes in the love he feels he doesn’t deserve. He lets himself love you like this, even though he knows he could love you more. He’ll just never let himself.

His fingers tickle your back lightly, while his metal hand holds his book. Finagling with the book to turn each page without having to take his hand off of you.

After a while, he feels his eyes are getting heavier, and hears your quiet snores start against his shirt. He carefully sets his book on the nightstand, and stretches to turn off his lamp but keeps his arm around you. The movement pulls you from your slumber— making you mumble sleepily.

“Bucky?” You rasp, eyes barely cracking open. As soon as he hears your voice he goes to soothe you.

“Just turning off the light, doll.” He says softly, making you mumble incoherently. After the darkness takes over the room, he turns his body to yours, pulling you into his chest.

“Go back to sleep,” Bucky whispers, as his arms settle around you. Metal arm careful but firm over your waist, hand splayed against your back. His flesh arm is under your neck, hand cradling your head that is tucked into his chest.

“You okay?” You mumble, voice showing you aren’t really awake. The care in your voice despite being asleep makes the loving ache in his chest grow.

“Always okay with you.” He whispers, fingers card through your hair soothingly. You hum something incoherent, and Bucky knows you’re not conscious.

As he falls asleep, he lets himself pretend he’s not afraid of loving you. He lets himself feel not like a monster, but a man who loves a woman.

—————————

In the very early morning, you are awoken to the feeling of a baby alien trying to rip through your uterus, aka period cramps. You lift your head off of the pillow, which you come to realize is Bucky’s bicep.

Bucky is sound asleep—he always sleeps better when he’s with you. That doesn’t change the fact he’s been trained to be a light sleeper. Your quiet whimper pulls him right awake.

His eyes fly open to see you hunched over, eyes closed like you’re still trying to milk the last ounces of sleep in you. He sits up, placing his warm hand on your back.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Bucky’s voice rough with sleep. You open your eyes, face turning to his.

“I’m sorry. Did I wake you?” You rasp, discomfort evident in your voice.

“What’s wrong?” He asks again, ignoring your concern for waking him.

“I’m cramping,” you make a small noise of pain. “My period must be starting.”

“Stay right here. I’m going to get you something for the pain.” Bucky is on his feet, and walking out the door.

You don’t want to move, but you know you need to go to the bathroom to put something on before the blood starts. With a weak groan you slide out of Bucky’s bed.

You switch on the lamp to check the sheets, just in case, even though you can’t imagine anything has actually started yet—you freeze when you see the fresh blood on his gray sheets.

“No. No, no, no, no, no.” Tears automatically come to your eyes, panicking over what to do. You immediately start stripping the bed. Your mind is a cloudy mixture of pain, embarrassment, and sleep disrupted weepiness.

You’ve barely moved the pillows out of the way, when Bucky returns with a glass of water and a bottle of ibuprofen. You whip your head to him, putting your hands out as if that would stop him from coming closer.

“Wait, stop!” You try to tell him, but he’s already making his way to you.

“Hey, what are you doing?” He asks in confused worry. Setting down the glass and pills on the nightstand, so he can move grab onto you. His eyes almost frantically taking in your expression, then he looks past you to the bed. It clicks in his brain when he sees the blood on the sheets.

“Oh, doll,” his voice painfully tender. You step back trying to block the bed.

“I’m so sorry. Give me a second and i’ll fix it,” your voice a sad plead. His heart breaking over the look on your face.

“What? No. Come here,” he shushes you. He steps forward, closing the distance, and pulling you into his chest.

Your mind is too cloudy with embarrassment to stop. You try to push off of him, but he holds you tighter—not in a painful way, but in a reassuring way.

“Bucky,” you cry weakly into his shirt. He shushes you, one hand stroking the back of your head.

“It’s alright, doll,” he coos. He understands why you’re upset, but this is nothing to be embarrassed over. Especially not with him.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t know I was gonna start tonight,” you sob into his chest. He feels the dampness of your tears through the fabric.

“Stop it. It’s okay,” his voice is so tender it makes you cry more. He says your name like a gentle plea.

“You can go lay in my bed and i’ll change your sheets, okay?” You hiccup, lifting your head off of him. Immediately, Bucky is shaking his head.

“Absolutely not,” both of his hands come up to cradle your face, and make sure you listen. “Here’s what we’re gonna do. I’m gonna take care of this while you go sit in a warm bath.” Your brow furrows in disagreement. He can’t help but find it adorable. You shake your head, but before you can speak, Bucky says your name with such sure care.

“I can’t let you deal with this. It’s gross,” you try, but he just scoffs in reply.

“Nothing about this is gross, you got me?” He lowers himself so he’s eye level with you. “You’re hurting. Let me take care of you.” The sincerity in his eyes, and the stabbing pain in your uterus, makes you lose your ability to protest anymore.

“Are you sure?” You cry pitifully.

“Sweetheart,” he pulls you back into his chest, “please stop crying. I’ve got you.” He kisses your head, then rests his cheek against your hair.

You let yourself melt against him, arm finally coming up around him. Once your crying becomes a soft sniffle, he pulls back just enough to look at you. The tears made your face puffy and splotchy—it breaks his heart.

“Here,” he reaches for the glass, handing it to you. He grabs the ibuprofen, shaking some into his hand. “That enough?”

You nod, reaching out to take the pills. Rasping a quiet, “Thank you,” after swallowing them.

“Attagirl,” he praises, while taking the glass from your hands to set it down. His hands come to rest on both of your biceps. “Now, hows a bath sound?”

“Yeah…” you nod, “that sounds good.” Bucky feels a sense of relief you aren’t fighting him on this anymore.

“Yeah?” He gives you a gentle encouraging smile. “Let’s go get you a bath then.”

Bucky guides you, carefully, down the hall to your room. You turned down his offer to carry you, cause you were worried about blood somehow getting on him.

“Why don’t you grab you some fresh clothes, while I run the bath?” He suggests. You give him a small ‘okay’. You shuffle to your dresser to grab some designated period underwear, a big oversized shirt, and some gray sweatpants.

When you walk into your bathroom, you notice only some of the lights are on—casting the room in a dim warm light. Bucky is sitting on the edge of the tub ensuring the water is not too hot. He notices you when you set your clothes on the counter. He stands up moving over to you.

“There’s my girl,” he gives a supportive smile. If your stomach wasn’t in so much pain, you would’ve felt butterflies when he said that. “I’m gonna go change the sheets, then i’ll be back to check on you.”

Your eyes tear up at the embarrassing thought of him having to change his sheets. He quickly notices and goes to shut it down.

“Hey, hey, hey. None of that.” His rough yet oddly soft hand brushes away a tear from your cheek. “I just want you to feel better.”

You wrap your arms tightly around his torso. He’s taken aback at first, then tightly hugs you back. “I’m really sorry,” you apologize again.

“Stop that,” he gives you a squeeze before pulling back. “Just try to relax. I’ll be back soon,” he kisses your forehead, then leaves the bathroom.

————————

The heat of the water soothes your discomfort. Dulling the pain of your cramps. Relaxing your muscles from the tension they’ve been holding. You sink deeper into the water—your hair tied dryly atop your head. Probably not safe, but you almost fell asleep. A soft knock on the door made you come to.

“Doll, I’m back. You doing okay?” Bucky’s voice comes through the door. Hearing his voice reminds you of the embarrassment—bleeding on his bed, sobbing in his arms.

“I’m good,” you call back, cringing at yourself for simply existing.

“The pain any better?” He asks.

“Yeah, some,” you reply. You feel awkward talking through the door when you’re currently in the tub.

“Good, hopefully the meds are kicking in,” his tone indicates he’s not feeling awkward at all, he just wants to help you. “Do you need anything else?”

“I’m okay, thank you. You don’t have to worry about me. You should go back to bed,” your voice sweet in way that makes Bucky frown.

“Doll, stop that,” he sighs through the door. He knows you are embarrassed, and you don’t need to be alone stewing on it.

“What?” You say, acting like you don’t know what he’s talking about.

“You take your time, and i’ll be out here when you’re done,” he says, giving you no room to argue.

—————————

When you finally climb out of the tub, the pain is a dull whisper. Your muscles warm and relaxed, making your movements slow. You dry off, make sure whatever period product you use is secure, and get dressed in the fresh pajamas you set out.

Bucky stands from your bed when you exit the bathroom. His heart skips at your appearance—shoulders hunched, baggy clothes, hair a half fallen mess tied up on your head. To him you’re so beautiful.

“Buck, you shouldn’t have waited for me,” you say softly, wrapping your arms around yourself to shield your warm skin from the cool air.

“How many times do I have to tell you I want to be here, before it gets through that hard head of yours?” He closes the distance between you, and pulls you into his arms. You let your tired self melt into his hold.

“I feel bad,” you murmur against his chest.

“Enough of that,” his flesh hand comes up to angle your face up at his. He feels unworthy to be able to touch something so soft.

“But Buc-“ you start but he shakes his head.

“Now do you want to lay in your bed or mine?” Bucky asks simply. “Either one you pick i’ll be there,” he adds. Making you huff softly. That feels like a win to him.

“My bed,” you say quietly. He smiles softly, thumb stroking your cheek once more.

“Your bed it is,” he nods. He gently guides you to lay down. He climbs in beside you, and automatically you find yourself in his arms. You’re curl into him, hands tucking against his chest.

“I’m really sorry about everything,” you mumble quietly against him, you still feel embarrassed despite how tired you are.

“Please stop apologizing,” Bucky’s voice just above a whisper. His metal hand cradling the back of your head, while his warm flesh hand rubs up and down your back.

“It’s so embarrassing,” you mumble sadly.

“Hey, look at me,” he pulls back enough to angle your head upwards. His eyes lock onto yours, trying to get the point across. “It’s not embarrassing, especially not with me.”

“How are you not upset?” You asks, tired lip pouting.

“How could I be upset?,” he exhales, shaking his head in disbelief that you could even think he was upset. “I just hated it for you, so stop apologizing. Okay?”

“…Okay,” you exhale softly. Your eyes have a shine of love as you look up at him. “I hope you know how grateful I am for you.”

Bucky presses a soft kiss to your forehead, your eyes flutter closed. He reaches up to gently brush a stray strand from your head. He notices the slight furrow in your brow. “Headache?” He whispers.

“Not too bad,” you open your eyes.

“Let’s get your hair down,” he hums softly. You rest your forehead against his chest, while his hands carefully unwind your hairtie. His hands so large and rough, yet so delicate with you.

Once your hair is free, Bucky slides the hairtie onto his wrist, then runs his fingers over your scalp. You felt like you could’ve purred from the touch. It released any left of tension in your body.

“That better?” He whispers. Your hum is all the response he needed to hear. It makes a small smile grow on his lips.

He rolls onto his back, pulling you with him. You settle on top of him, as he pulls the covers higher over you.

“You okay?” He hums.

“Mhmm,” you nod against him.

Bucky keeps his flesh hand on your back and the metal one gently rubs your scalp. He knows the coolness helps with your headaches. It’s very obvious by the way you go limp against him and start drooling on his shirt. He smiles to himself, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“Sleep good, pretty girl.”

———————————————————————

i hope you guys enjoyed my first fic ! let me know what you think !

As a technician in the Avenger’s tower, you always wore the white coat on your usual clothes so you didn’t have to think about your outfit in the morning.

Today was different.

Ever since Sam told you that he could be the perfect match for you, you panicked.

He was Bucky Barnes.

The Bucky Barnes.

The former Winter Soldier now turned into a perfect built of muscles and blue eyes. He filled the space involuntarily every time he was in a room. His smile, sweet and warm, made your heart flutter every time you looked at him.

“You know,” Sam told you bringing your usual coffee. “Buck is really a great guy,” he took a sip. “And very much interested in you…” he left the phrase hanging.

“Yeah,” you huffed. “Six feet tall, built like a wall and fluffy hair… my type…”

You snorted thinking of how it would be weird seeing you two together.

“Why are you so… like that?” He asked you, looking straight into your eyes.

You put down the screwdriver on the table. “Because,” you started. “He’s handsome and… I’m just me…”

“Have you ever thought that ‘just you’ is what Bucky needs in his life?”

You laughed again.

“I’m serious,” he put down his coffee and turned better toward you. “He spent years being controlled and after that tons of women wanted him just because he has an handsome face…”

“He is handsome…” you confirmed.

“Yeah I know,” he told you. “But you could be the one for what it’s worth…”

It was true, Bucky was handsome but it wasn’t just that.

He was gentle, kind and friendly. He took his sweet time to acknowledge the new world he was in. His dating life was practically non existen and Sam was also true, women only wanted him for the night completely forgetting him as the sun came out.

“Sam,” you sat better on the stool. “I know what you’re doing but… he’s not going to be my boyfriend. I mean look at me,”

“I am,” he took a step back looking at you. “Before thinking of you as an annoying little sister,” he snorted. “You knew I thought you were beautiful.”

Sam took you under his wing, treating you as a sister as he noticed how you were way more mature than what he was thinking. Sure he gave you a look the first time he saw you, but with no malice. Now he made as his personal mission, to be the matchmaker for you and Bucky.

He saw how you two interact with each other.

You smiled when he entered every room, after he did the same exact thing careful to avoid being seen.

He noticed how much you like liquorice so he packed the cupboard.

Some shy hello and goodnight in the lobby bumping into each other.

That exact same afternoon, Sam took the decision of talking to Bucky.

“Hey Buck,” Sam said, finding the super soldier in the kitchen. “How’s life?”

Bucky looked at him, while pouring himself a cup of coffee. “Good.” He murmured.

“Right… having coffee I see…”

“Like every day, Samuel.”

“Damn, government name…”

“Need something?”

Sam sat in front of him and looked at him, resting his face on his closed fist. “How’s the last date? Went well?”

“Please,” Bucky took a sip of coffee. “She was desperate. I tried to talk but she ranted about her life and how she wanted to be an actress… and she didn’t let me talk,”

“Sounds bad.”

“Terrible.” Bucky confirmed.

“So, you need another date to erase the old one?”

“I don’t know, Sam,” Bucky whispered. “I don’t know if I’ll ever found someone for me…”

Sam looked at his best friend sweetly. “Maybe the one is close… closer than you can imagine…”

Bucky raised his head and looked at him. “Don’t joke please…”

“I’m not,” Sam smiled widely. “I’ve got the perfect lady for you… Y/N.”

Bucky chocked on his coffee. “Y/N? Are you out of your mind?” He whispered shout. “I can’t date Y/N!”

“Why?” Sam asked, clearly bothered by Bucky’s tone, arching an eyebrow.

“WHY? Sam,” he rested the mug on the table. “Y/N is too good and beautiful and kind and way out of my league…” he looked down. “What can I offer to someone so damn good?”

Sam breathed out relieved. “She’s not out of league,” he said remembering you telling him the exact same thing. “She’s warm so do you. She’s kind so do you…”

Bucky perched an eyebrow.

“Oh, shut up... you help that old lady crossing the street just two days ago.”

“Well, no one offered…” he blushed.

“So, you are kind too… and you have two amazing blue eyes which by the way may have already captured her… trust me…”

Bucky couldn’t believe it.

He had a big crush on you since day one.

Your warm smile, the way you perched on the table of the lab fully concentrated on the work you had to do. He noticed how you followed his movement, just as he looked and starred at you but in no way, you would be interest in him.

A broken former super soldier, scarred of the dark and with nightmares constantly keeping him awake in the night.

In his mind the thought of being in bed with you just cuddling, made his heart beat so fast.

“Even if this was true,” Bucky raised his index finger at Sam. “Don’t do anything… I can’t ruin our… relationship.”

“Buck,” Sam glared at him. “What relationship? You barely speak to her.”

“And that’s good. I can admire her from afar without being a trouble for her.”

Sam raised his arms in the air. “Alright,” he said smiling. “I’ll drop it. Don’t go cry when she’s gonna be with someone else.”

The thought made Bucky’s blood boiling.

Two days after that conversation, Sam decided to push the both of you.

He called you from the common room, asking you to went up from your lab. He then called Bucky, saying there was an emergency in the kitchen. Bucky grunted and picked up the towel from the floor, as he was training in the gym.

Once you were in the corridor, Bucky appeared. There was no point of avoiding him. You both looked down, while Bucky called the elevator. The moment the door close, everything stopped.

The steel box stopped his journey and a voice echoed in the small space.

“Sorry guys,” Sam told through the comms. “Must be the power… it went down for some reason.”

Bucky looked down, trying to made himself smaller in a corner. You rested yourself on the side of the elevator, completely far from Bucky. You had the impulse of covering your body but making that, your breast was a little crushed between your arm and Bucky blushed taking a quick look.

“Sorry,” he whispered.

You looked down at your chest. “No problem,” you said feeling the warm raising on your face. “Hope it’s quick…”

It wouldn’t be quick.

After a couple of minutes, Bucky began to wipe his forehead with the towel. His natural scent along the sweat was a devastating combo for you.

After almost ten minutes, you began to relax. “So, you were in the gym… sorry if Sam interrupted you.”

“No problem,” he told you. “I finished already… and you?”

“Oh, I was in the lab,” you said pointing at the white coat. “Had to fix some hard disks…”

After fifteen minutes, you were talking like normal people.

“You like reading?” You asked Bucky.

“I love reading,” he confirmed. “Keeps me busy at night…”

“Can’t sleep?”

He shook his head no. “Listen,” he started talking. “Would you like to have a cup of coffee or dinner sometime?”

“Dinner?”

“Uh… yeah,” he immediately regretted. “But you don’t have if… you don’t want…”

“I want. I want having dinner with you Bucky.”

“Amazing,” Bucky tried to contain his excitement. “Tomorrow night? At eight? The Chinese restaurant around the corner?”

“Sounds good.”

You gave him your address and in that exact moment, the door opened.

“Guys,” Sam shouted happily. “See wasn’t so bad.”

You both blushed.

“Don’t kiss or sleep with a guy on your first date. Maybe a kiss on your third date is okay but that’s it.”

That’s what your mom told you every time you had a date.

“I know mom,” you looked at yourself in the mirror. “Time to get ready. Call you later.”

Standing in front of the mirror, you looked intensely at your figure.

The white and fluffy towel hugged your curves. The knot you did slightly pinched and lifted your breast and the soft fabric covered your tummy.

“Why can I go out like that?”

You immediately started to think on what you could wear.

Bucky asked you out, in public at dinner.

He would be embarrassed of you, a voice in your head told you.

No, you thought. It’s gonna be awesome.

You opened your closet and starred at it.

Pants? Too formal.

Skirt? There’s wind outside so, no.

Jeans? Too casual.

A dress? Could work.

You picked the dress you used during a failed date where the guy treated you so bad, you almost swore to never date again.

It was black, knee length. The waist slightly tighter but soft on the belly.

Enough high necked to leave you breathe but not enough to made the other person stare at your chest.

You blushed thinking when Bucky looked at you involuntarily and blushed.

You paired the dress with black stocking and a pair of heels.

“Bucky’s big guy… he could handle it…”

Eight o’ clock on the dot, you enter the restaurant.

You noticed Bucky in the corner of the restaurant, and you saw something that made your heart beat faster. In front of him, a bouquet of peonies. You took a look while he was fidgeting with his hands. Hair combed back, a black shirt and dark jeans. As he sensed your eyes on him, he looked up and waved his hand. You walked to the table and he stood, quickly circling the table to pull out the chair for you.

“Hi,” you said already blushing. “Thank you, Bucky.”

He pulled out the chair, waited for you to sit and then circled back, sitting himself again. “Uh,” he stuttered a little. “I got you this… Sam said you like those…”

“I love them.” You smelled the flowers. “Thank you.”

After giving you the bouquet, a veil of silence surrounded you both.

Bucky quickly coughed a little. “So,” he took a sip of water. “How’s your day?”

“Pretty good,” you replied omitting completely the absolute crazy and non-sense convo you had with your other best friend.

“I’m telling you, Y/N…” she said on the phone. “I don’t know him, but I can say he’s a gentleman… and he’s handsome too…”

“Y/F/N! You’re married,” you laughed.

“Yeah, but I have eyes girl!” She shut down for a second. “I know why you’re nervous… but he’s not like the other guys you went out with. He’s from another time and you told me he already treats you good.”

“Yeah, as a colleague but… we’re talking about a date and he’s so…”

“So?”

“So handsome and brave and handsome,”

“You said it twice…”

You heard the smile in her voice. “Yeah, because he is… and I’m just me.”

“Maybe you’re the one for him.”

“Did you talk to Sam? God, he said the same exact thing…”

“Listen honey… just be yourself. He asked you out… it means something…”

You smiled thinking back at the phone call.

“What’s so funny?”

“Uh,” you looked down at the elegant glass in front of you. “I was thinking about my best friend… she helped me getting ready for… this…”

“Sam’s gonna be so noisy about that…” he snorted.

“Yeah, I can picture it… but I was talking about Y/F/N… let’s say she’s like Sam.”

“Oh,” he touched his heart, faking offnce. “God, why are so doomed…”

During all dinner, Bucky was the perfect example of a gentleman.

First helping you with the chair, then some quick chat about the usual pleasantries. He made you so at your ease, you forgot you had a six feet tall super soldier with blue eyes and a deathly smile in front of you.

“What?” He asked you, noticing you were staring at him.

“Oh,” you woke up from your daydream. “I was curious about why you asked me out…”

You involuntarily looked down, ready to the same and old reply.

“Well,” he sat better on the chair. “Isn’t it obvious?”

Here, you thought. That’s when he tells me about how he would love to date in private but not in public.

“Wasn’t it obvious what?”

“That I like you… very much… and I wanna spend time with you…”

“What?” You yelled.

“Yeah,” he looked uncomfortable. “Am I missing something?”

For the first time, you were speechless.

Every man you went out with, always wanted you for the night or the weekend away without any witnesses. You knew how you looked.

Your tummy wasn’t flat.

Your eyes weren’t blue.

Your hair wasn’t blonde.

You looked down more, fidgeting with your fingers. “Why did you ask me to meet here?”

“I know you like Chinese and I thought you weren’t comfy with me knowing your house before anything…”

You were too stunned to speak.

“Yeah,” he grabbed his head, scratching the back of his. “I mean back when I was younger my ma would have absolute beat my ass for not picking up a girl… but I figured times changed and a guy knowing your address immediately would made you…”

“Uncomfortable…” you finished the phrase.

As the dinner went on, your hand was intertwined with his as you walked out of the restaurant. He of course forced you to accept him paying the bill.

“Put that goddamn purse away sweetie.”

You blushed so hard, resting your forehead on his back.

He kept the door open for you, taking his sweet time to glance at you. You turned as he closed the restaurant’s door.

“Wanna take a walk?”

“Sure,” he said walking behind you, letting you slide away the street. “Keeping you safe.”

He took your hand into his, letting his thumb caress your knuckles. He rested the bouquet on his shoulder.

Your heart beat faster.

Involuntarily, you found yourself right in front of your apartment. “Oh,” you looked up at your building. “Didn’t realise I basically walked you here…”

“Don’t worry,” he stood in front of you, towering over you. “It’s a nice building.” He snorted, moving a chunk of hair from your face.

“Wanna get in? You know for a sweat treat…”

“I shouldn’t.” He told you.

You looked down, quite sad.

“You know what?” He picked your chin in his hand. “Let’s have a sweat treat.”

You smiled softly, picking the key from your purse.

He moved behind you, protecting from potential danger. His hand rested on your hip lightly. In the small elevator, he tried to keep his hands on himself but failed the moment you purred against his chest.

“Doll,” he looked up at the elevator’s ceiling. “Please…”

The bing signalled the arrival at your floor.

Inside, your apartment was already cozy and warm. Bucky slid off the jacket and then promptly helped you with yours. His fingers delicately grazed your skin. He kissed your shoulder as you removed your heels.

In that moment, with that kiss, tons of doubts rose in you.

You froze. “Want a beer?” You tried to keep your tone normal. “You can have a seat, Bucky.”

“Sounds good.” He replied, sitting on the couch.

“Popcorn?”

“Absolutely, doll.”

You padded back from the kitchen, balancing a bowl of freshly popped corn in one hand and two movie cases in the other.

Bucky was already sprawled across the sofa, his long legs stretched out, his dark hair falling in soft, untamed waves around his face. As you approached, he looked up, a lazy, affectionate smile curving his lips. He immediately shifted over, patting the cushions beside him in invitation.

“Alright, doll,” he said, his voice a low, rumbling timbre that settled right in your chest. “What’s on the docket tonight?”

You held up the remote, pointing at the tv. Tons of options appeared on the screen, but before you could even pitch them, Bucky raised a hand in mock surrender. “Your call. You know I’m terrible at picking these things anyway. Anything made after 1945 is basically magic to me.”

You chuckled, setting the snacks on the coffee table. But as you turned to sit down, a tiny, familiar flutter of hesitation kicked up in your chest. You looked at the space he’d made for you, then down at yourself. Being a woman with soft, generous curves, a silly little thought always tried to sneak into your head.

You sat down a little tentatively on the edge, but Bucky didn’t give your overthinking a single second to take root.

With a soft chuckle, he reached out, hooked his strong arm around your waist, and effortlessly pulled you right into his lap. He didn’t just let you sit next to him; he scooped you up until you were firmly nestled against his broad chest, your hips resting comfortably against his thigh.

“Bucky, wait… am I squishing you?” you murmured, a light blush rising to your cheeks as you tried to adjust your weight.

Bucky let out a warm, rumbling laugh that vibrated straight through your back. He wrapped both arms securely around you. His left arm, cool and polished, resting comfortably across your waist to hold you steady, while his right arm draped over your shoulder to pull you flush against him.

“Doll, I’m a super soldier,” he teased gently, pressing a soft kiss into your temple. “I lift armoured vehicles for fun. You feel absolute perfection to me. Soft, warm, and right where you belong. Now hush and let me hold you.”

The quiet reassurance melted your worries instantly.

Cuddling with Bucky was an experience entirely unique to him. It wasn’t just comfortable, it felt undeniably safe. In a world that was constantly loud and demanding, being held in his impossibly strong, loving grip felt like stepping into a fortress. He radiated a steady, cozy warmth and the rhythmic beat of his heart beneath your ear was a quiet rhythm that lulled all your lingering stress away.

As the movie played, your fingers absently traced the seams of his shirt and Bucky’s flesh and blood hand stroked gentle, loving circles over the soft curve of your hip. You shared the bowl of popcorn, trading quiet commentary and soft giggles, completely lost in the cozy cocoon you’d built together.

When the final credits finally began to roll, you let out a long contented sigh, sinking even deeper into his broad frame.

“Enjoy that one?” Bucky asked, his chin resting lightly on top of your head.

“Mm, loved it,” you murmured sleepily. “Best part was the company, though.”

Bucky hummed, a playful glint suddenly sparkling in his ice-blue eyes as he tilted his head to look down at you. “Oh, yeah? Even the part where you hogged the entire bowl of popcorn?”

You blinked, feigning offense. “I did not hog it! I offered you plenty!”

“Right, right,” he teased, his grin widening, showing those faint dimples that always made your heart flutter. “You offered me the unpopped kernels at the bottom. Very generous of you, sweetheart.”

“You are so full of it, James Barnes!” you laughed, turning in his lap to push playfully against his chest.

“Am I now?” He grinned.

Before you could react, his hands darted to your waist. His fingers lightly dug into your sides, and a jolt of pure laughter burst from your throat.

“Bucky! No… stop!” You squealed, squirming helplessly against him as he gently tickled your ribs.

“Just making sure you’re paying attention,” he barked out a laugh, his face lit up with pure, unadulterated joy.

Determined to fight back, you reached out, trying to dig your fingers into his waist. But Bucky was far too quick. With a smooth, soldier’s reflex, his large hands clamped around both of your wrists, holding them lightly above your chest. He hovered over you with an insufferably smug, victorious grin.

“Nice try, doll,” he chuckled, his dark eyes crinkling at the corners. “You’re fast, but I’ve had a few decades of training.”

You were trapped, outmaneuvered, and breathless from laughing. You needed a distraction, fast.

Looking up at him with wide and innocent eyes, you softened your posture. Bucky’s smirk faltered just a fraction, his gaze dropping to your lips as he fell for the quiet cue. Taking your chance, you leaned up quickly and pressed a soft, lingering kiss right to the center of his cheek.

The effect was instantaneous. Bucky’s breath hitched, his grip on your wrists loosening as his eyes fluttered shut for just a second, entirely disarmed by the affection.

Gotcha.

The moment his grasp slackened, you yanked your hands free and immediately drove your fingers right into his ribs.

Bucky gasped, a loud, startled laugh bursting out of him as he instantly doubled over, twisting away to protect his waist.

“Hey! That’s… that’s cheating!” He wheezed, his hands coming down to block yours as he squirmed across the couch cushions.

The formidable super-soldier was reduced to a helpless, wheezing mess of laughter on a Friday night living room sofa. His deep, full-bodied laugh filled the room, as he tried to fend off your fingers while catching his breath.

Eventually, he managed to catch your waist once more, gently pulling you down flat onto his chest so you couldn’t reach his sides anymore. Both of you lay there, chest to chest, breathing heavily, the sound of your shared laughter slowly tapering off into quiet, happy sighs.

Bucky looked up at you, his face flushed, eyes shining with a warmth that could melt glaciers. He reached up, gently tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone with immense tenderness.

“You’re a menace, you know that?” he whispered, his voice soft, affectionate, and utterly devoted. “Can I kiss you?”

“Of course…” you whispered.

As you replied, his lips smacked on yours. He rose his head a little meeting your face.

His hands flew between your hair, gripping them. His other hand, the metal one, grabbed your lower back. He pulled you toward himself. No space between you.

“Bucky,” you tried to speak. “Bucky, stop.”

He stopped immediately. “Oh my god sorry… did I hurt you or…”

You snorted. “No silly,” you smiled at his panicked voice. “I’ve never been with a guy like this…”

“Me too honey… I usually wait but you’re so-”

You interrupted him. “No… I mean I’m… a virgin,” you looked down, pressing your hands on his chest. His arms remained around you. “I’ve never done anything like that.”

You blushed and he looked at you like you hung the moon. “Oh doll,” he hugged you tightly. “If it’s too much we can’t stop right away,” he kissed your forehead. “No pressure.”

“I trust you, Bucky.” You looked straight into his eyes.

Bucky growled and stood up from the couch, you squeaked.

“Wait,” you said, grabbing him tightly.

“Are you scared I’d let you fall?” He gripped your tights harder. “You dated little boys… I’m a man.”

And then he kissed you deeply.

Guiding him with your voice, between kisses, he entered your bedroom. He let you down on the bed, gently and sweetly like you were made of glass.

Your back dipped in the bed, sinking more when he rested his knees.

Bucky never stopped kissing you while his hands roamed on your body.

His fingers traced line on your legs, his tongue dove into your mouth and his hips kept you down on the mattress.

“Tell me to stop, doll.”

“I don’t want you to stop.”

“Good.

He knelt on the bed, thighs around your hips. He slid of his shirt after opening the buttons. His chest appeared and you couldn’t avoid staring at it. The scar on his shoulder glowed under the lights of your bedroom.

“You’re so handsome, Bucky.” You said feeling the warmth rose up to your face.

“You’re the gorgeous one here.”

He looked at you, asking permission to take off your dress. You nodded blushing.

Sitting on the bed, he was still knelt on you lap. His hands went behind you and slid down the zip. He helped you taking off the dress, lifting your hips with his metal arm.

“So good… so damn good…” he breathed out.

Dress on the floor, his shirt near it. He took his time looking at you and you felt the urge to cover with your arms.

“No,” he delicately took your arms, opening them. “If we do that, I wanna see you…” he kissed you more on your collarbone where the bra stopped. “All of you…”

Convinced, you rested your arms on his shoulders pulling him toward you. He happily complied.

His mouth went down, on your breast. He took another look at you and when you nodded, his fingers slid behind you on your back. The bra felt in a second.

He cupped your boobs with his big hands, and you felt the contrast between his flesh one and his metal one.

Sucking on your nipple, he growled. “So soft…”

“Bucky…” you breathed out.

He followed a path on your stomach and stopped at the edge of the stocking.

“Can I?”

“Yeah,” you nodded quickly.

He smiled and looking at you straight into your eyes, he removed stoking and underwear.

You were now fully naked in front of him.

“A vision…”

He kissed your tight first, then the other one and when he felt your fingers through his hair, he dove down on your core.

Feeling electricity in the entire body, you arched your back as the tip of his tongue played with your clit.

“BUCKY! You yelled, grabbing his hair. “OH GOD… DON’T STOP…”

He remained silent, devouring you.

He didn’t stop until your legs were shaking.

As the pleasure rose and explode inside you, your core clenched.

“Just like that good girl…”

His fingers now pinched and played with your clit, walking you through all.

As your breath became normal again, he kissed the corner of your lips.

“Ready for more?”

“Fuck yes…”

He smiled and stood up.

In the heat of the moment, you didn’t notice he was still wearing his pants.

You turned your head and rested your body on your elbow.

“Like what you see?” He smirked at you.

“You know the answer.”

Looking at you without stopping the eye contact, he slowly unbuckled his belt. As he made it snatched out of the jeans loops, you flinched excited.

He took his metal hand and unbuttoned the jeans, sliding them down on his big thighs. The boxer made nothing to mask the erection he had.

“Yeah…” he looked down and then sweetly at you.

“Come here…” you pointed your finger at him.

He slid down the boxers and his cock sprang free. You gulped at the size.

Bucky snorted and knelt back on the bed. He kissed your legs and your stomach, about you weren’t uncomfortable anymore thanks to him, and positioned himself between your legs.

“It may hurts, doll…”

“Don’t care. I trust you.”

He dipped down kissing you and in the same exact moment, he slid the tip of his cock inside you. You opened your mouth while he was still kissing you.

“I know… I know…”

You grabbed him by the neck and kissed him more. “More please…”

He snatched his hips and inserted himself inside you completely. He remained immobile for a second, letting you adjust to the size. “Fucking made for me…”

He began to move when you nodded to him.

Never letting go the eye contact again, he began to move.

You felt every inches, every veins and even the warmth his big body irradiated.

He grabbed your face and kissed you more and deeply, suffocating every moans.

“Buck…”

“I know… me too,” he pushed harder. “Come with me, doll…”

Another wave of pleasure hit you. Bucky immediately followed you.

Coming down again, you were now exhausted.

“You did it so good, Bucky…”

“You did it so good too, doll…”

He slid his arms around you, pulling you against his chest.

After some minutes, he stood and walked out toward the bathroom.

You heard the water running when he came back.

Without talking, he picked you up in a second.

“Bucky?”

“Can’t let you sleep like that…”

You blushed sensing your whole body in the air, in the arms of Bucky.

In the bathroom, the shower’s water was already ready and steaming.

He opened the door with one hand and walked inside. He finally let your feet touch the floor.

“Don’t give me that look,” he told you looking down. “Your like a pillow in my arms… I barely felt your weight…”

“Bucky…”

“No,” hi kissed you. “You’re so goddamn hot and I’ll spend my life telling you that.”

He pinned you against the shower wall and kissed you.

You found out quickly Bucky Barnes was a serial kisser.

After the shower, in which he insisted was the only one licensed and good to wash your hair and back, he picked you up again and brought you back on the bed.

The morning sun filtered softly through the bedroom blinds, casting warm golden stripes across the duvet. Bucky stirred first, his gaze tender as he looked down at you. Pressing a trail of soft, feather-light kisses along the crook of your neck and up over your shoulder, he smiled as you slowly blinked awake.

“Morning, beautiful,” he hummed, his voice deep and gravelly with sleep.

You murmured a sleepy greeting, pulling the blanket higher as you snuggled deeper into his chest. As you lay together in the quiet lazy morning, your fingers absently found the skin where his flesh met the intricate seam of his metal arm. You gently traced the soft, raised patterns of his scar before leaning up to press a lingering kiss right against it.

Bucky went completely still. When you pulled back, his ice-blue eyes were glistening, glassy with an emotion so deep it left him breathless.

“You deserve to be loved, James,” you whispered softly, looking right into his soul. “You deserve all the good things.”

His breath hitched. Without a word, he cupped your cheek with his large, warm hand, his thumb brushing over your skin as he pulled you into a kiss that tasted like devotion and quiet reverence.

Then, with a sudden burst of mischievous energy, he flipped you smoothly onto your back. A delighted squeak escaped your lips, followed by a bright laugh as he hovered right over you, a wicked, handsome smirk playing on his lips.

Hours later, the afternoon light washed over the room while you two remained tangled in the sheets, blissfully glued together. The sharp ring of your phone shattered the quiet, displaying Sam’s name on the screen.

You answered on speaker, holding the phone between you while Bucky rested his chin on your shoulder, his arm draped possessively over your waist.

“Alright, you two,” Sam’s voice boomed playfully through the speaker. “Just checking in to see if James actually let you leave the house today, or if I need to send a rescue team.”

You and Bucky locked eyes, biting back triumphant grins.

“Oh, no rescue needed, Sam,” you replied, your voice smooth and innocent. “Bucky just came over.”

Bucky leaned his head closer to the microphone, a sly smile dancing on his lips. “Yeah, Wilson. I just came, too.”

A beat of stunned, dead silence stretched over the line as Sam realized he’d been completely out-maneuvered, leaving him zero room to tease. Before Sam could recover or offer a sputtering retort, Bucky reached out, tapped the screen, and ended the call.

The bedroom exploded into shared, breathless laughter. Bucky buried his face in the crook of your neck, his body shaking with chuckles as you ran your hands through his messy hair.

When the laughter finally settled, he leaned up, looking at you with pure, radiant affection. He captured your lips in a slow, sweet kiss, sealing the perfect quiet of your afternoon together.