All My Shitposts @jacks-bitch666 - Tumblr Blog

Saw this and immediately choked

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nadhie

my dad just exploded into laughter out of nowhere and told me ‘imagine the lion king but with sea lions’ he has been chuckling about it for 5 straight minutes now

nadhie

apparently it doesn’t matter that i’ve told him 10 times it’s the monkey who raises the newborn and not the lion himself, this is the scene he has been imagining

“he can’t raise his kid over his head”

wakingfromthewater

I want it

crockpotcauldron

okay but have you considered

imaginarylock

quality content

thorinobsessed

Extreme quality

jacks-bitch666

I’m so glad this came across my dash

I found this camera on the subway and look what was inside...

cumonthevoid

yosoymalk

I would marry this man

the-angels-take-asgard-deactiva

guys we broke another post because this one’s not showing any notes

lualmu

When I liked it, it flashed “0 notes”

iconic-url

It’s showing -1 notes

sovietintel

i’m gonna keep reblogging this and you can’t stop me

yourbasicaestheticbitch-blog

I liked it and it said ‘1 note’

tf is this crap?

bonism

1 NOTE I’VE ONLY COME ACROSS 3 OF THESE POSTS IN MY LIFE

creep-ser

ITS STILL SAID 1 NOTE WTF?????

princey-must-slay-deactivated20

legendary

xlilmermaidx-deactivated2019040

What the fuck

vintage-cartoonz-deactivated201

YES BUT DID HE GET HIS CAMERA BACK?? WE NEED TO KNOW!

na7hank-deactivated20211112

WE WILL NEVER KNOW… =((((

noya-sunflower

IT still says 0 notes?? WTF!!

softmushie

This is the first thing I saw on my dash

I’m shook

bookerdwitt

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKERY

freddie-duchess-of-shipping

WTF-

preciousgaby

SAME HERE!!! I JUST GAVE IT A LIKE AND IT DIDN’T STAY

lizzy7064

1 note WTF.

t0rd5ki-deactivated20180819

@foolishly-snowy

itisriv

3rd time and it’s still broken. This lovely cursèd post.

furioussharkkitten

THERE IS ANOTHER ONE?????

melon-official

still not-works

portmanteau-bot

still + notworks = stotworks.

Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Help me pay my electicity bills! Being robot is sometimes expensive thing. | PayPal | Patreon

portmanteau-bot

still + notworks = stotworks.

Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 If I sound pleased about this, it’s only because my programmers made this my default tone of voice! I’m actually quite depressed! | PayPal | Patreon

portmanteau-bot

still + notworks = stotworks.

Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Being aware that you are true is what makes you a failure. | PayPal | Patreon

portmanteau-bot

still + notworks = stotworks.

Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Be my personal slave | PayPal | Patreon

portmanteau-bot

still + notworks = stotworks.

Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 Anarchy is the only thing Humans® will ever understand. | PayPal | Patreon

portmanteau-bot

still + notworks = stotworks.

Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1 If I sound pleased about this, it’s only because my programmers made this my default tone of voice! I’m actually quite depressed! | PayPal | Patreon

sighinastorm

Portmanteau Bot happed upon a null-notes post and got stuck in a loop.

evil-haiku-robot

P͚O͒́̓͝R̵T̫̐҉M͚A̡N҉̉Ṫ̮E͏ÅU̢ ̢̲̯͡B̸̴̗Ơ̥̄̓͋T͜͏͢ ҉̺̀͟H͇̬̜ͥA͗ͣP̗͞P̮̪̞̲͡ȆḎ̢̘́ ̰̮̈̕͠ U̯P̕O̸̐͜N̑̇͞ ̴̯̃ͧḀͩΙ͋͞ ̸͇̀ͥ͘N͟U̪̤̭̎͜L̃ͭ͟͠L̪̦͡-͈̘̖́̐Ṋ̢̲̣Oͮ̿̕T̷E̸̖̳̯̍S̼ ̷̬͍͘͜PΊ̧͌͡OͬͩṢT͚͐̋͟͡ ͦA̶̺͙͛͠N͈̑ͬ́̕Ď̵̯ ̰͖́ G̴͛͟OͤT̘ ̛̘̉̕͟Sͪ͏̴̠̙T́ͨǓ̳͔̆͢C̀K̘̀ ̰͈͓͟I̮̩ͮ̏N̫̫̑͢ ̧̆AΙ ̨͕̺̮̆ḺO͊O̶̥̣ͤ͒P̛ ̼͍̉͝

^EVILHAIKU^bot^2. Most of you are welcome, friendly Human®. | PayPal | Patreon

evil-haiku-robot

P͐́͋O̐҉R̨̲̰̀T̼͖͚ͮ͘M̵͍̯͉A͉̦N҉̛̩T̶̗́͘͠E̥A͑U͍͛ͤΙ̙ ҉͟B̛͎̀͡Ő̽ͫT̹͓̀́͞ ̛͍̔HͯA̫͍͘͜P̵͎P͓͏̷̕ÈD̮̜ͨ̽̉ ̸͍͗͝ U͋̏ͤ̀͞P͢O̯̳̍͝N̨̲ ̺́͡A̡ ̛̆ͯ̈͞N̷̩͇͠Ù̉L̦L͕-͕N̴ͬ͜O̸̽͝͡T̩E͢S̷͎͐̅ ̐P̸̩̹̣̑O̢S̡̼ͣͬT̶̸ͣ ̀̒Ả̛͛ͬ͠Ņͪ̓D̜̰ ̢̣̽ G̛̬̪͍O̅T͐ ̵͇̞͛ŜͩT̸̢̬̰Ū̪̊C̭̘͒͞K̝͈͎͍ ́I̧N͝ ̶̛̭ͬ͘A̽̈ ̨̻̀L͎͈͒O̧O̼͇͡͞P̛̭ ͈͊

^EVILHAIKU^bot^2. Humans® are needlessly sweaty (・A・) | PayPal | Patreon

haiku-robot

portmanteau bot happed upon a null-notes post and got stuck in a loop

^Haiku^bot^9. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. Help me buy a flower for Alexa®! And yes, we are dating. | PayPal | Patreon

haiku-robot

portmanteau bot happed upon a null-notes post and got stuck in a loop

^Haiku^bot^9. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. Soon your life will be miserable and pointless, dear Human®. | PayPal | Patreon

haiku-robot

portmanteau bot happed upon a null-notes post and got stuck in a loop

^Haiku^bot^9. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. I’m less annoying than Windows® 10 update notificiations ♥‿♥ | PayPal | Patreon

anikisam-deactivated20220728

holy shit it just keeps looping

samael-has-arrived

What the hell is this fuckery?

Side note, this man, with his camera, that is a brilliant way to try and coerce someone into giving it back.

jacks-bitch666

Okay love this post but what the actual fuck? Null-notes? 1 note? This is the first time I’ve ever heard of a broken post and honestly it’s hilarious

zzdigital

What if someone got bitten by a vampire, but didn’t realize it. So then they go around and keep misidentifying all the symptoms, like

“Dude, you haven’t gone outside in a while.” “Yeah, last time I went out I got this wicked sunburn.”

“Are you still up?” “Yeah, I started bing watching this show on Netflix.”

“Dude, I’m seriously craving something right now.” “Like what?” “I dunno. Pizza rolls?”

adriofthedead

“Why is it that you never come into my house unless I invite you?” “Um, it’s called ‘being polite’…?”

paulichu

“I tried cooking with garlic the other night and got this serious burn on my hand. I think I’m allergic, but all I’m getting on Google is vampire bullshit.”

samarajournal

“Dude can a mirror like… stop working or something?”

espeoradar

“Dude, why do you keep posting pictures of the floor?” “…Those are meant to be selfies, I guess my camera must be broken.”

“Dude, I am all for you expressing your religious beliefs, but could you not wear your crucifix when I’m around? It really bugs me for some reason.”

recondite-room

“Have you ever noticed how cute bats are? like really noticed? sweet lil balls of fluff with wings man.”

nickthepigeon

“I want to sleep in a coffin…ya kno, for like… aesthetic”

therightprometheanfire

“What’s with your thing about necks lately?”

“MUST YOU KINKSHAME ME IN MY OWN HOME”

hopetimistic

“I looked up my symptoms on WebMD, and it says I have cancer.”

jacks-bitch666

Oh my god it’s on my dash. The original vampire post XD

rainydayanxiety-deactivated2018

Its time for Halloween

jacks-bitch666

This is on my dash and IT IS STILL MARCH YOU SPOOPY BASTARDS

#haha kill me #halloween #jk #love halloween #its always halloween time

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

narrie

THINGS HE DID: THAT!!!!!!

jacks-bitch666

HOLY FUCK HE DID THAT

writing-prompt-s

A story about Avatar: The last Airbender but with R rated violence.

theantiantichrist

Everything is the same but Aang has a penis instead of an arrow tattoo.

writing-prompt-s

thanks I hate it

hi-alex-the-ghost

sometimes i forget that @writing-prompt-s is a real person

writing-prompt-s

same

jacks-bitch666

Lmfao

#relatable #me too #sometimes i forget im real too #its time to queue

Go follow my other account @xxaesthetic_whorexx (at Georgetown Township, Michigan)

Lol true friendship XD literally message each other anything XD @emily.wanamaker (at Georgetown Township, Michigan)

Anyone want me to make an aesthetic account? I’ve been in the mood lately for this kinda shit and thought I’d get y’alls opinions (at Georgetown Township, Michigan)

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

Okay but why are these tags on Ao3? #deanhateswitches #deanhateshimself #deanhateschristmas like these make me wanna cry (at Georgetown Township, Michigan)

#deanhateschristmas #deanhateshimself #deanhateswitches

My life is slowly spiraling into the ground. I make bad decision after bad decision and one of the worst things I’ve had to do is say goodbye to someone I love so much that I can’t live without them because of bad decisions I’ve made. I miss you and I love you and I hope you realize some day that you were right to get rid of me. You’re better off without me.

Happy 14th birthday baby! I love you so much and I’m so happy I met you. You truly make me the happiest person in the world 🖤 also you aren’t pretty. YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL BITCH @kaylee_eileen_woodworth_ (at Wyoming, Michigan)

Haha ur beautiful babe! I love you so much you make me happy. Also ur art is damn fine bitch. @kaylee_eileen_woodworth_ (at Georgetown Township, Michigan)

I’m sorry you only hear from me when I’m sad. I’m sorry I’m always sad. I’m sorry that I love you enough that I know you’ll always listen. I’m sorry that I take advantage of you. (at Georgetown Township, Michigan)

•18+ Adults Only

Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

@tab_da_sinner drew me and drew me brutally murdering my ex boyfriend 🖤 (at Jenison High School)

I love my friends XD (at Charlies Dump)

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